WAA Weirdos Emissary
by GengarFan3
Summary: WAArio, WaluiGEE, Falcocococo, INSANE Hand, WeegIiIiI, Mlleo, Ssssnake, DONE Hunt, Tails?, add a :zpecial guest! GO down angst the Hot Toxin Crew andAndAND CUTe Tot Howse- But... wasn't this universe done for? Didn't it get rebooted? Discover what is going on by starting on Chapter 1?.
1. Ch 1: Ow The Edge And What The Fuck

**Chapter 1: Ow The Edge And What The Fuck**

**NOTE: This is an alternitive universe from Super Wario Bros.: Daily Life at Smash. Also, the stories "Hot Topic Krew" and "Cute Toot House" are property of GeneralDarkPit and Yoshizilla respectively.**

Wario was sitting at a large desk, picking his nose while watching "The Sky had a Weegee" on his laptop. Waluigi was sitting in a nearby recliner, busy playing Gmod with Yoshi and Duck Hunt Dog. Suddenly, the phone on Wario's desk began to ring, causing the plumber to pick it up.

"Wario here!" the pest said over the phone. He listened to the other line for a bit before his face turned to shock. "Sweet mother of Sparta, this is a complete emergency!" He replied before hanging up. "Falco, Crazy Hand, front and center!"

"Sir, yes sir!" The two idiots shouted as they barged into the room.

"Go get Weegee and his army here, on the pronto!" Wario ordered. "Waluigi, you get all inhabitants of the Smasher's Palace in the court!"

"Aye aye, sir!" Falco and Crazy cheered before leaving.

"You got it!" Waluigi replied as he put his laptop onto a nearby table. As he walked towards the exit, Wario closed his eyes and placed his hands on the table.

"He said only to use it in case of an emergency..." Wario muttered as his left hand reached for one of the drawers. "Well... this is an emergency all right." He pulled the drawer open, revealing a large, pink, conch shell inside. He grabbed it with his right hand and brought it to his mouth. "We are in need of his aid..." He then blew into it, making a horrid noise that filled the whole room.

**XxXx**

"What is the meaning of this?!" Weegee shouted.

"And I thought I was finally going to have a relaxing Sunday for once!" Lucario grumbled.

"I was in the middle of such a great game too..." Ness muttered.

"Will you all just shut up?!" Waluigi shouted, though no one listened.

"QUIET!" Wario shouted as he smashed the judge's stand with his oversized mallet.

"Wario, you need to pay for those damages, you know," Master Hand said.

"Shut up!" Wario order as he flung the mallet at the floating hand. It missed it's target and instead landed in the middle of Dark Pit's face.

"Damn the gods!" Original the Angel cried as he fell to the floor.

"Now, let us begin, shall we?" Wario said. "In some alternate universe, fanfiction, whatever you want to call it, two beyond evil armies are destroying not only their own forces, but their own planet as well!"

"And this is our problem how?" Marth asked.

"Shut up, "Pretty Boy Butt Monkey!" I'm talking!" the yellow pest yelled. "Their planet will be nothing but rubble if we don't do anything about it!"

"Again, not our problem," Marth argued.

"Shut up!" Waluigi commanded as he fired Dark Pit's staff at the prince. Marth fell to the ground, unconscious from the blast.

"You asses still have my staff?!" Dark Pit roared. "Give it back!"

"Shut up, you Original Character!" Waluigi responded as he fired the staff again.

"Thank you!" Wario thanked his friend. "Now, I demand that everyone grab as much as you can get! Those of us going to war will need it!"

"Might as well..." Bowser sighed as he got up.

"Only for Waluigi's heart," Lucina thought to herself.

"So, when will "he" be arriving?" Waluigi asked his friend.

"Soon enough, Waluigi," Wario answered. "Soon enough."

**XxXx**

Wario, Waluigi, Falco, Crazy Hand, and Duck Hunt Dog were all gathered around a table in the palace's basement. Many items were gathered on said table: the Dinner Blaster, Dark Pit's Staff, Falco's laser-pooping gum, a DVD of WAA-conda, two loafs of bread, ten Super Mushrooms, four 1UP Mushrooms, two Super Stars, the DVD collection of the first three seasons of SpongeBob, Wario's 3DS, Mario Kart 7, Crazy's nail polish, and Sonic 06.

"Sonic should be getting the rest of the weapons, and everyone else should be gathering our food supply," Falco said seriously. "Wario, are you sure we should do this?"

"We must, for the poor people on that planet," Wario replied. "Besides, it's not like we have anything better to do."

"So, playing Gmod, running people over, annoying Weegee with prank calls, and making parodies of cruddy songs aren't fun now?" Duck Hunt questioned.

"That's not the point!" Wario argued. The door to the basement was then banged on.

"I am here, ready to fight EVVVIIIILLLLLLL!"

"Is... is he finally here?!" Falco squealed.

"Come on in!" Wario said. The door swung open, revealing a fat old man in the most ridiculous costume you could ever find. He jumped down the stairs in an epic front flip, and landed safely on the floor.

"It is I, Mermaid Man!" the old man shouted.

"MERMAID MAN!" Crazy shouted in pure joy as he flung himself across the room.

"I am ready to combat the forces of EVVVIIIILLLLL that is the Hot Topic Krew and the Cute Toot House!" Mermaid Man cheered.

"As am I!" Duck Hunt Dog said.

"Me too!" Falco added.

"Mermaid Man!" Crazy spazzed.

"Ready as ever!" Waluigi joined in.

"Then let's get out there, and rub those losers' faces in our glory!" Wario cheered as he cracked his neck and knuckles.

"YEAH!" the rest of the group shouted as they grabbed the items on the table. Wario took the Dinner Blaster and his 3DS, Waluigi snagged Dark Pit's Staff and the Mario Kart 7 cartridge, Falco grabbed his gum and the loafs of bread, Crazy got his nail polish and the WAA-conda DVD, DHD swiped the Sonic 06 and the SpongeBob collection, and Mermaid Man snagged the Mario power-ups. They all rushed up the stairs, through the halls, out the back exit of the palace, and to the Smasher's Garden, where many of the Smasher's were building rocket ships for the adventure ahead.

"Hey, Wario!" Sonic called the fat plumber. "Tails and I got all those weapons you wanted!"

"They're all packed into the trunks of every vehicle that will be heading out into space!" Tails added.

"Great!" Wario replied. "Now go leap into that plane thing of yours, cause we'll be leaving soon!"

"Sonic, do we really have to?" Tails asked his best friend as Wario's group walked away.

"Tails, I have learned one thing about the Wario Bros.," the blue hedgehog replied as the duo walked towards the Tornado. "If you try to resist them, things will only wind up worse for you in the end. Might as well do what they want."

**XxXx**

"Is everyone in their rockets?" Wario asked over a radio transmission.

"Falco here. Inside my Arwing right now." the bird responded.

"Mermaid Man here, inside the Invisible Boatmobile!" the superhero said.

"Sonic and Tails here, ready for takeoff!" Tails added.

"Snake and Duck Hunt here. We're ready to barrel roll." the soldier said.

"Haha, good joke there, Snake! Crazy Hand here in the Whatever!"

"Weegee and Malleo here, in the Super Yushee, like we were forced to," the Luigi clone muttered.

"Say, isn't Lucario supposed to be with you, Crazy?" Wario wondered out loud. "Where is that flea bag?!"

**XxXx**

"Ahhhh..." Lucario sighed as he leaned back in his recliner. "No Wario or Waluigi for who knows how many days." The Aura Pokémon sunk his feet into a foot bath as he grabbed the Sunday paper. "This is going to be the greatest experience in my life!"

**XxXx**

"Who cares, he's worthless anyways!" Waluigi shouted.

"Whatever. Prepare for takeoff!" Wario ordered.

"All right. All secondary characters come with me," Master Hand commanded as the rest of the Smashers walked away from the rocket ships.

"Remember to keep your hands, feet, and private parts inside the vehicle at all times," Waluigi said to the others in a rather robotic voice.

"First, music!" Wario said as he turned on the radio in the Wario Mobile, with "We're the Kids of America" instantly playing. "Now, to space!" Wario turned the keys in the ignition, turning on the engine. He pulled the shift and set it in "Fly", resulting with two wings popping out of the purple vehicle. Rainbows began to spew out of the exhausts, and the car took to the sky.

"For doughnuts!" Mermaid Man shouted as he went into the air.

"WHEEEEEEE!" Crazy spazzed as the Whatever took off rather oddly.

"Here we go!" Snake shouted as the Mega Duck took flight.

"The bread shall protect me!" Falco shouted as he took to the skies.

"Malleo, quit fucking around with the controls!" Weegee shouted as he tried to keep his brother's arm back.

"Come on, this is fun!" Malleo argued as he kept pressing random buttons.

"At least we're going on this stupid adventure together, right Sonic?" Tails asked his blue friend, getting no response. "Sonic...?" Tails turned his head to find his friend missing. "Sonic, I should have known you would have bailed on me, you mother-"

"There's another thing I learned about Wario and Waluigi," Sonic said as he was laying in a beach chair, holding a pouch of Capri-Sun in his left hand. "They are also too stupid to realize you bailed on them at last second! Ha!" He was about to take a sip of his drink when Shadow rushed up to the blue "faker".

"DON'T DRINK THAT!" Shadow demanded as he slapped the drink out of Sonic's hand. "IT'S ILLEGAL!"

"Wow, that was so ironic," Sonic muttered.

**XxXx**

"I never thought space looked so beautiful!" Malleo said as he was admiring the stars.

"Say, how exactly are we breathing in space with helmets?" Duck Hunt Dog asked.

"I dunno," Wario responded as he grabbed a Nyan Cat that was flying through space. "It's one of those mysteries that don't matter, really." He then proceeded to eat the Poptart with a cat head, enjoying it's taste.

"Look!" Tails yelled. "It's the Death Egg Mark II!" The small group passed by the large space station surrounding the planet known as Little Planet.

"Now that is what I call a masterpiece!" Weegee complimented on the space station. "Eggman is one hell of a scientist!"

"More like a heck of a moron," Tails argued. "More than twenty years of Sonic games, and he still hasn't defeated Sonic."

"No evil genius stands a chance against a Gary Stu. We all know that." Weegee commented.

"EVVVVIIIILLLL!" Mermaid Man yelled.

"Sonic is not a Gary Stu!" Tails argued.

"Sure, a hedgehog that can run at the speed of sound, has an insane fan girl, and can apparently beat his dark clone who can manipulate time and space, totally isn't a Gary Stu. I can so buy that," Weegee sarcastically said.

"Q-quit calling Sonic that!" the fox stuttered.

"Weegee, quit being a jerk to Tails!" Falco ordered. "Arguing like this will only bring us down in the war."

"Hey, you actually made sense with that sentence. You may not be as stupid as he initially seem," the crude meme said.

"Weegee, stop!" Wario demanded. "What did Falco just say?!"

"Oh fine," Weegee grumbled. "Just tell me I can insult the enemies."

"Feel free. We're dealing with goths and preps. They deserve the insults," Waluigi said. The "screen" then began to shift back to the Death Egg.

"Why is the screen zooming in on the Death Egg thing?" Snake asked.

"Never pay attention to minor details in our universe," Crazy said. "Fanfics are always containing weird things like that."

**XxXx**

Dr. Eggman was walking through a hall in the Death Egg, approaching a large open room with a large computer inside.

"How's the progress on rebuilding my Interstellar Amusement Park, you two knuckleheads?" The egg-shaped scientist asked his two minions, Orbot and Cubot, who were busy working on the large computer in the room.

"We just reopened Sweet Mountain to the public, and it is raking in wheelbarrows full of money by the hour!" the red Orbot exclaimed.

"Excellent!" Dr. Eggman replied. "Soon, I'll have more than enough money to pay for the repairs we had on this glorious masterpiece of mine!"

"What masterpiece? This place is a hunk of junk!" the yellow Cubot commented.

"What?! How dare you offend your master's glory?!" Eggman shouted at the yellow robot.

"Well, it's not my fault this place is basically being held together by bandages!" Cubot argued as he held up a picture of the Death Egg, covered by Band-Aids.

"You just keep that voice of yours silent if you are going to question your master!" Eggman ordered. "Or else I'll have it removed! I don't even remember why I ever bothered to give you one in the first place!"

"You gave it to me so I can talk all day and all night!" Cubot replied. "Speaking of talking, I once talked to this guy, who knew this guy, who knew this guy, who knew this guy, who knew this guy, who knew-"

"Can someone please just shut this idiot up?!" Eggman roared. A small blue ball then rolled into the room at high speed and sliced Cubot in half, with the sound of a bunch of bowling pins falling booming throughout the room. Three Egg Pawns across the room each held up a sign. Two of them had a ten on them, while on had "7/ 10, too much water" on it. Other Egg Pawns across the room then started insulting the Pawn holding the 7/ 10 sign.

"Cubot! Are you all right?!" Orbot screamed as he leaped from his chair.

"Heh, I've felt worse..." Cubot muttered.

"At least I have a few competent minions on this thing. Thank you, Metal Sonic!" the rotund genius thanked the blue Sonic robot, who bowed in response.

"Speaking of incompetence, you might want to look at the screen, sir!" a nearby Motobug said.

"What are you talk- oh my goodness! What do those edgeheads think they're doing?!" Eggman yelled.

"Edgeheads. Like how you're an egghead?" Orbot asked.

"No! I am not an egghead!" Dr. Eggman roared. "More importantly, these edgy idiots will pay for what they are doing to my park!"

"They're just sliding across the park..." Orbot muttered as he saw Dark Pit, Lucas, and Shadow sliding across the ground.

"WITH THEIR BUTTS!" Eggman hollered as he slammed his fists down on the control panel. "Do you know how disgusting that is?!"

"Aren't they from another fanfiction? How did they get here?" an Egg Pawn wondered out loud.

"Because this is a crossover, you idiot!" Dr. Eggman answered as he walked to a nearby elevator. "And I am sick of all these fourth wall breaking jokes! Metal Sonic, come with me!" The genius and the robot went inside the elevator and Metal Sonic began to stretch his legs. "I'm putting Mecha Sonic in charge until I'm back. Don't do anything stupid while I'm gone." He then began to press some of the buttons on the elevator's control panel. "Once I'm done with this mission, I'm gonna have to give myself a PRRRRMOTION!" The door shut, and Eggman and Metal Sonic went down to the Death Egg's deck. A taller Sonic robot then walked into the room, noticing his master gone.

"Is Eggman out doing stupid stuff again?" Mecha Sonic asked.

"Yeah, and you're in charge!" Cubot said as Orbot managed to get the yellow robot's head on his body. Everyone stayed silent for a few seconds before Mecha Sonic spoke up.

"Party till we're purple!" he ordered. Mecha Sonic began to breakdance as "Metal Sonic's Theme" from Sonic + All Stars Racing Transformed began to play. Cubot and Orbot "moonwalked", while the Badniks surrounded the three dancing mechas, cheering them on. The computer screen changed to a video of the Keyboard Cat on his keyboard, while a disco ball lowered from the ceiling.

**XxXx**

Eggman and Metal Sonic ran out of the elevator as "Never Let It Go" from Sonic the Fighters began to play. They ran through the deck of the Death Egg, leaping over any Badnik they came across. They soon came across a pair of rails and began to grind across them, with a giant, red, Metal Sonic look-a-like beginning to chase after them. The duo jumped to grab some floating rings whenever possible, and eventually managed to fit in a small hole just the right size for them. The red robot smashed into the wall causing a massive explosion the two got away from by leaping high into the air. They quickly landed on the ground, and began dashing again. They barely made it safe from the falling spike balls, which were caused by the magnetic ceiling failing to keep it's power on. The two then leaped into a large cannon's internal mechanism. It rose high into the ceiling, taking the duo to the cannon itself.

"Hey, which way is the cannon facing? HEY!" Eggman roared just before the cannon fired, sending the two out and across the deck, all the way to a large, metal, and gray Sonic head, which they promptly destroyed with their force. They leaped into the sky, now on "snowboards" made out of scrap metal, before they began to slide down a large, steel slope, dotted with seemingly completely iron buildings. Eggman and Metal Sonic swiftly dodged said buildings with ease, as a large, rocket-powered truck began to chase them. To were chased by it for a short amount of time, as it crashed into a large building before it could reach them. They leaped off the snowboards as Never Let It Go stopped playing.

"Are you ready to see that most impressive piece of machinery in the entire universe?!" Eggman asked his companion as they slowly approached a large door.

"Most certainly, master!" Metal Sonic replied in his slightly robotic voice.

"Then, behold!" the doctor screamed as the door opened, revealing the Egg Mobile, now with a side seat reserved for Metal Sonic.

"...Are you serious? This is it?" the robot asked, completely annoyed.

"Wait until you see the best part!" Eggman eagerly said as he rang a bell attached to the seat, as if the seat were a girl's bike. "It even has a basket for all your little goodies!"

"I sometimes wonder why I haven't fused with the other Sonic robots, crashed the Death Egg into Mobius, and killed Sonic's friends without you controlling me," Metal Sonic grumbled.

"Did you just make a reference to something so obscure, no one is likely going to get it?" Eggman, now inside the flying machine, inquired his minion.

"No, you're just hearing things," the robot replied as he got comfortable in his seat. "Now, let's roll."


	2. Ch 2: Lost And Separated

**Chapter 2: Lost and Separated**

"Have we past the damn fourth dimensional border?!" Weegee yelled, tired of hearing Malleo's blabbering.

"Bla bla bla bla, ble ble ble ble, blo blo blo blo!" Malleo said.

"Yes, we finally have," Wario replied. "Believe me, I'm just as sick of his odd sounds too."

"More importantly, we need to brace for impact!" Waluigi warned the group. "We are approaching the alternate universe!"

"How exactly do we brace ourselves?!" Snake asked.

"Uhhhhh..." the purple pest responded as time seemingly froze around them. "I forget." A very bright light then blinded the group as they began to scream.

"WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE, WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!" Duck Hunt Dog screamed.

"I want my mommy!" Snake shouted before he began to suck his thumb.

"This is fun!" Crazy Hand squealed happily. The light dissipated, with the group gone as well.

**XxXx**

"According to my information, we seem to be approaching the final alternate universe barrier," Dr. Eggman told his metal assistant, who was currently busy looking at his fingers.

"Yippie," Metal Sonic said, not amused. "What's the plan anyways?"

"We're going to kidnap that leader of this "Hot Topic Morons" and hold a massive ransome for him," Eggman gloated as he cracked his nonexistent neck. "Then, when the rest of the cult shows up, we ambush them, and we will hold them in our grasp forever, forcing them to clean up their mess!"

"They just slid around the park, it's no big deal," Metal Sonic muttered.

"WITH THEIR BUTTS!" the fat mad man yelled. "Do you robots just have no sense in how bad germs are?!"

"We're robots, why should we care?" Metal replied as he gazed off into the stars.

"Well, I sup- WOAH, WE'RE ENTERING THE ALTERNATE UNIVERSE!" Eggman screamed as they encountered the same light the heroes ran into earlier.

"HAAAAHHWHAAAA!" Metal Sonic screamed.

**XxXx**

"Huh?" Waluigi said as he woke up, feeling the gravel beneath his hands. "Am I dead?"

"Far from it pal!" Wario assured his friend as he got up. "We're alive!"

"Hurray!" Waluigi cheered as he sprang up into the air. "Just... where are we?" The duo looked around, noticing that they were in a cave very similar to the Mermalair.

"You like it, boys?" Mermaid Man asked the idiotic pair as he and Tails approached them. "I managed to build this place right under a Pizza Hut while you three were sleeping!"

"Wait, us THREE?!" Waluigi nervously asked.

"Sadly, yes," Tails replied with a frown. "We were the only ones down in this tunnel when Mermaid Man woke up. I'm afraid that we must have gotten seperated while we were breaking through the fanfiction barrier."

"WAA! What are we gonna do?!" Waluigi panicked. "Falco, Crazy, Weegee, Malleo, Duck Hunt, and Snake, all out on their own!"

"Bud, calm down!" his friend reassured him. "They are capable of surviving... except for Weegee, who's just a massive pingas about everything, and Snake, depending on how much of a pervert he has been lately. Besides, we'll find them! After all, we are the WAA Weirdos Emissary!"

"Speaking of which, we haven't done our epic cheer like the Hot Topic Krew has!" Mermaid Man brought up.

"Then let's hit it!" Waluigi said. "A one, a two, a one two three four!"

"Wario, the leader!"

"Waluigi, the general!"

"Falco, the bread guy!"

"Crazy Hand, the guy currently having a nightmare!"

"Weegee, the only serious guy in this crossover."

"Malleo, the guy who has no idea on what he is doing!"

"Snake, the pervert!"

"Duck Hunt Dog, the dog!"

"Tails, the smart one!"

"And Mermaid Man, destroyer of EVVVVIIIILLLL!"

"And now for our theme song!" Waluigi added before the Pokémon Anime theme song began to play.

"We're gonna be, the very best, like no clique ever was!"

"To smash them is our real quest, to humiliate them is our cause!"

"We will travel across the land, waaing far and wide!"

"This edgeheads, need to understand, the power of bread!"

"Wario, gotta smash them all, it's you and me!" It's not our destiny, but who cares?"

"Oh, you're my fattest friend, in a world we must defend!"

"Wario, gotta smash them all, and it's also true! That Palutena just made a poo!"

"You teach me and I beat you! WARIO!"

"Gotta smash them all, gotta smash them all, Wario!"

"W-wow," Vector the Crocodile stuttered as the quartet finally noticed him. "That was the most beautiful song ever. But that doesn't excuse you punks for building a hideout underneath my Pizza Hut! I'm so going to throt-"

"I'll pay you with this golden hedgehog that can lay golden eggs if you let us stay here, give us free pizza, and ban the Hot Topic Krew and the Cute Toot House from the Pizza Hut," Mermaid Man said as he whipped a golden Shadow the Hedgehog from his right pocket.

"I did not ask for this," the hedgehog grumbled.

"Woah, why didn't ya say so?!" Vector gleefully replied as dollar signs popped up onto his eyes. "You got yourself a deal!" He then swiped the hedgehog from the super hero's hand and rushed up the newly built stairs.

"Well, that was rather awkward," Wario said as he scratched his butt.

"So was the part where everyone else joined in on our cheer when they weren't anywhere around here," Tails replied. "How did that happen?" The four then stared into the "screen" for a few moments before Mermaid Man fell asleep standing up.

"Well, um, er..." Waluigi stuttered, feeling odd about the fat hero's sudden and recent actions.

"Bah, forget about that!" Wario said. "We need to find our friends before either of those evil armies do!"

"Let's keep in mind that we can't just barge into the outside world without a decent cover to keep us hidden," Tails added.

"Don't worry, we have the perfect cover for us to use!" Wario assured the young fox.

**XxXx**

"Where the hell are we?" Malleo asked Weegee as they were strolling through the Seaside Hill Zone.

"How should I fucking know?" the crude meme snarled. "Just keep your voice down. The last thing we need is to be overheard." The duo walked some more before the scent of tacos filled their noses.

"Mmmmmmm... tacos..." Malleo said as his body began to float towards the scent's source. Weegee followed him, wondering how in the hell his brother's body could float like that. The two came to a stop on a cliff that was overlooking Waluigi's Taco Stand.

"I didn't know that this universe's Waluigi owned a taco stand too," Weegee commented.

"Yeah. Too bad he's on break right now. I really want some tacos!" the Mario clone said.

"Dude, we're fricken evil," his brother reminded him. "We can just steal all the tacos from him!"

**XxXx**

"I said we can steal from Waluigi, not burn the entire seaside to the ground!" Weegee grunted as many fires razed across the Zone, causing the locals to panic.

"Well, at least we have our tacos!" Malleo responded. "Besides, we're "evil". We can totally do stuff like this."

"Don't mock me!" Weegee ordered. His body then began to shake oddly. "Hold on, my "We Have Someone to Watch" sense is tingling!"

"You mean you're getting an erection?" Malleo teased.

"No, you jackass!" Weegee shouted. "Now, into the Warp Pipe!" A gray Warp Pipe then popped out of the ash-covered ground below their feet. Malleo jumped into the pipe, with his brother quickly following afterwards.

**XxXx**

"Where are we?" Malleo asked as the two found themselves inside a small, dark, area.

"I think this is a closer of some sort," Weegee whispered as he felt clothes in his right hand. "More importantly, just what the hell is that moaning?"

"Not sure, I'll check," his brother responded as he took a peak through the crack in the wood. He stared through the wood for a few seconds silently.

"What's with this silence?" Weegee wondered.

"It's something really disgusting..." Malleo whispered. "This universe's Palutena is nude..."

"Disgusting? Dude, that's fucking aw-"

"... And having lesbian sex with that mushroom girl, Toadette," Malleo finished.

"-ful!" Weegee whispered. "Oh well, I guess I could just try to keep that mushroom out of view and keep my eyes on that sexy goddess."

"Good luck with that," his brother muttered. "I'm getting out of here."

"And how do you plan on doing that without getting caught?" Weegee asked his annoying brother.

"That's simple," Malleo answered as he mutated into his 2D, pixelated form from Mario is Missing. He then slipped through the crack of the closest and slunk down to the floor. He slid his completely flat body across the floor, all the way to a nearby window. He snuck through the bottom of said window and managed to sneak outside, completely undetected.

"I forgot we could do that," Weegee muttered as he turned his attention back to the two love birds. "Man, it sure is hard trying to keep that ugly pink creature out of my view though. Damn it all!"

**XxXx**

"I-is anyone here?" Falco nervously asked as he made his way through an empty, mechanical, and rusty hallway. "W-wario? Waluigi? Anyone?!" He then entered a large chamber, finding Crazy Hand on the ground.

"M-monster! No! Wario!" Crazy screamed as he twisted and turned, as if he was having a nightmare.

"Crazy!" Falco yelled as he ran right towards his friend. "What's going on!"

"Death Hand! Darkness! Wet panties!" the hand continued to scream.

"He must be having a nightmare of some sort..." the bird muttered as he placed his hand on Crazy's thumb. This seemed to relax the giant hand, as he stopped his screaming and stopped squirming. Falco smiled, and a tear began to form on his eye. It fell down his face, and dropped onto the floor, surprisingly loud. This scared him and brought him back to his senses. He took a look across the large room, noticing a big pool of pink water in the center. "Wait... is this... the Ark?"

**XxXx**

"It's a good thing no one found us while we we're exposed," Duck Hunt Dog said to Snake, strutting along through the mall in his new trench coat.

"I still don't get how you can walk on two legs," Snake replied as he put his hands into his trench coat pockets.

"Me neither, but who really cares?" the dog responded as he looked around the mall, noticing Toadsworth entering the Barnes and Noble store.

"You know, I've never really visited a mall before," Snake said.

"Really? Surprised to hear that, old Snakey."

"Old Snakey? We haven't known each other that long for you to call me that."

"Maybe so, but you still are one of my closest friends," Duck Hunt said. "I mean, you're one of the few who did seem to know me before I came to the Smasher's Palace. Heck, Mario barely remembered me!"

"Heh, I guess so, Ducky," the soldier replied with a smirk on his hardly visible face.

"Ducky? Is that a reference to some other fanfiction?"

"And ironically, it's one where you get killed... though that hasn't happened yet... I think."

"Hey now, spoilers!" Duck Hunt Dog said as he punched his ally softly in the stomach. He then caught the scent of something in the air.

"What is it?" Snake asked, growing serious.

"I thought I smelled someone... someone evil," the dog responded. "It must just be me though."

"Alright, let's just keep a sharp eye out for anyone suspicious." What the duo didn't realize however, was that someone was watching them from a faraway potted plant.

"Mmmmm... they look like possible threats," the being muttered. "I wonder... are they among those that entered our fanfic to stop the us and the Cute Toot House?" He closed his eyes, allowing this to all sink in. "The leader needs to know about this. I should have known he was right all along." The being then leaped out of his hiding spot, revealing himself to be none other than this universe's Shadow the Hedgehog, wearing a red hoodie. He pulled up the hood and sped off, down the mall, to the abandoned Chuck E. Cheese's.

**XxXx**

"This appears to be the mall of question," Dr. Eggman said as he and his robot companion approached the front entrance.

"Good," Metal Sonic replied as he stretched his arms. "Because I need to kick some dark hedgehogs right in the butt."

"What deal do you have with Shadow in particular?" Eggman inquired, slightly pulling on his long mustache.

"Well, for one, he did replace me as "Sonic's doppleganger rival"!" Metal said, slightly irritated. "And two, he's nothing but a pathetic Original Character. As if our franchise doesn't have enough of those."

"You do realize that you are one of those "Original Characters", right?" the scientist argued.

"I AM NOT!" Metal roared on the top of his nonexistent lungs. "As my creator, you should very well know that!" He then punched a nearby tree, causing a beehive hanging from one of the branches to fall down and break on poor Dixie Kong, who was busy sipping on too much grape soda.

"Ow!" she squeaked, holding onto her head with her free hand. She then noticed the broken hive down by her left foot, and quickly looked up to see a sea of angry bees, staring directly at her.

"That's not gonna look pretty," Metal Sonic said as he scratched the back of his head.

"Nice bees, good bees..." Dixie pleaded as she walked backwards, away from the mad horde. They then struck, many of them stinging her all over. She screamed in terror and ran away. "Buuuuuurrrp! Oh great, now I'm burping! Now, not only do I have a huge swarm of bees after me, I'm gonna burp my butt off, and this is so going to prompt someone to make a burping fetish fanfiction about me! Buuuuuurrrrrppp! Worst day ever!" With that, she ran off into the sunset, with the swarm still after her.

"... That was odd," Eggman said awkwardly. "Back on topic, you are indeed an Original Character."

"All right, just don't go spazzing who-know-what!" Metal angrily replied.

"ORIGINAL THE CHARACTER, DO NOT STEAL!" a certain voice shouted.

"What did I just tell you?!" Metal Sonic asked his creator.

"I didn't do it," Eggman responded, pulling his mustache again. "And be thankful. At least you don't have so many quotes everybody could be screaming out loud at any given time."

"PINGAS! BEHOLD MY FLOATING MASTERPIECE, THE EGG CARRIER! I HATE THAT HEDGEHOG! GET A LOAD OF THIS! YOU KNOW WHAT THEY SAY, THE MORE THE MERRIER! EVIL HAM!" the certain voice yelled.

"WHAT?! I demand to know who in the peanut barrel did that!" Eggman roared as he scavenged the area for any potential suspects. His eyes eventually came across a walking piece of cardboard, saying "Nothing to see here".

"OK, now who is that much of an idiot to use that as a disguise?" the blue robot wondered, nearly laughing.

"OK, now how much of a pair of geniuses are we to use this as a disguise?!" Wario said holding up to pieces of cardboard, hiding Waluigi, Tails, and his own physique.

"I'm still surprised that this is actually working," Tails said as a Goomba approached the three from the side.

"Nothing to see here, huh? Gee, that's convenient!" the Goomba said before walking away.

"You've got to be kidding me," Eggman sighed, watching the mushroom minion waltz away.

"Eh, people can be idiots. Some stupid, and some Patrick stupid," Metal Sonic replied.

"Still... something like that is so obvious, even those without brain cells should know that's hiding a secret of some sort!" the doctor said as he face palmed himself. "I swear, the people of today..."

"Hey Tails, where are we?" Waluigi asked the twin-tailed fox.

"Let me see..." Tails whispered, peeking out of the small gap between the cardboard. "Hmmm... it's looks like we are in the parking lot of a mall."

"... Did you just say "mall"?" Waluigi asked his he lacked expression on his face.

"Yeah. What did you think I said, "That tornado is carrying the sign post?" or something?"

"THAT TORNADO IS CARRYING THE SIGN POST!" the certain voice shouted.

"Knock it off, Wario!" Tails ordered.

"Mall. Mall. M-m-m-mall-lll..." Waluigi stuttered as he began to quiver.

"Is he OK?!" the yellow fox wondered.

"Yeah, he just really likes malls," Wario said.

"MALLLLLLL, MOTHERFLUFFERS!" the purple pest yelled as he leaped out from the cardboard and rushed for the entrance. The cardboard fell to the ground, leaving Wario and Tails exposed.

"What, is that OUR universe's Tails, Wario, and Waluigi?!" Eggman wondered as the two gave chase after their ally.

"Possibly. But what in the great Cyan Wisp would they be doing here?" Metal Sonic pondered, scratching his chin. "And what's with Waluigi's fetish over malls?"

"It's not a fetish!" Waluigi screamed as he whacked the blue robot with his tennis racket, knocking him over. The moron then made his way back over to the mall.

"Oww... bad question," Metal grumbled as he got back on his feet.

"One thing's for sure: we need to find out just what they are doing here!" Eggman said as he grabbed his robot's left arm. "Onward!"

"Today's gonna be a very long day..." Metal muttered as the doctor dragged him towards the large building.

"Hey, a mall!" Malleo said as he approached the same spot the two villains were just standing at. "Maybe I can finally get my damn nails redone. It's been years." He then pulled off his right glove, and the "screen" gave a close up of his disturbing hand, complete with large warts, blood stains, and tons of wrinkles. He put the glove back on before screaming "It's mall time!"


	3. Ch 3: Mayhem At The Mall

**Chapter 3: Mayhem At The Mall**

One happy, little Koopa Troopa was swinging on a mechanical horse ride, laughing as his younger sister watched him. Waluigi quickly ran up to the horse and knocked the young Koopa off, before hopping on it himself.

"Hey!" the Koopa angrily said as he got up. "I was riding that thing first, mister!"

"Oh yeah?" Waluigi responded. "Too bad, Waluigi time!" He then slapped the Koopa, causing him to run away whilst crying, with his sister giving chase.

"Waluigi, you need to stop this chaos!" Tails ordered as he and the fat yellow plumber approached him. "We're going to be exposed!"

"Who cares, I'm having fun!" Waluigi argued as he leaped off of the horse and ran towards the northern part of the mall.

"Oh brother!" Tails yelled. "How are we going to find Waluigi in a mall of this size?!"

"We split up, obviously!" Wario suggested. "You follow him, while I hang around here, in case he comes back!"

"That's... actually not a bad plan," the fox said.

"Eh, sometimes I'm not as stupid as usual," Wario stated as he gave Tails a map of the massive mall. "If you find him, bring him to the GameStop here, OK?"

"Roger that, see ya!" Tails said as he ran after the skinny plumber. Wario then felt his lower intestine groan oddly.

"Uh-oh, gotta "bake some brownies"," he joked. "YA KNOW, IN THE BATHROOM, WITH MY BUTT!" He ran directly towards the closest men's bathroom, not to far from where he was standing. As soon as he entered the restroom, Dr. Eggman and Metal Sonic came inside the mall.

"How are we supposed to find those three inside this dump?" Metal asked as he impatiently tapped his right foot, arms crossed.

"All we need to do is find the camera room, and we'll find them as simple as that!" Eggman said proudly.

"And how are we going to find the camera room?!" Metal asked as he got slightly annoyed.

"Everyone knows that they are right in the open! Everybody's just too oblivious by all of the amazing stuff in these malls," Eggman answered. "Thankfully, I'm not one of those that one of those money wasting fools." He then sniffed the air, catching a wonderful scent. "Sayyyy, what's that... AHHHHHHH!"

"What?! Did you find some Hot Topic Krew members?!" Metal Sonic asked as he got into a battle stance.

"No!" Eggman squealed happily. "This mall has a Villain's Thrift Store opening up over there!" He pointed to a new store, right next to the restroom Wario went into. He grabbed onto his minion's arm and rushed over to the new store. "Into that shop!"

"Hypocrite," the blue robot grumbled as Wario exited the bathroom.

"Ahhhh, so much better," the pest sighed as he scratched his butt. "Hm, now what to do... I know! I'll apply for a job at that McDonald's!" He then ran faster than Sonic towards the restaurant as Malleo entered.

"Let's bring out my to do list," the chubby meme said as he reached into his pocket. He pulled out a list that said "Get nails done, buy lotsa spaghetti, break the fourth wall, act stupid, call Weegee, and sell my damn copy of Sonic 06". "Seems simple enough for one trip to the mall. Let's get this shit done!" He looked up from the paper to see a huge group of fat, hairy nudists staring right at him, one of which walked right up to him. The two had a staring contest before Malleo blinked.

"Haha, I won, bitch!" the ugly nudist cheered.

"Fuck you!" Malleo roared as he charged up a massive eye laser. He fired the attack, vaporizing all of the disturbing nudists. He blinked twice before he turned his head towards a Shy Guy policeman, who had seen the whole incident.

"Oh. My. Spaghetti," the Shy Guy said in awe.

"Uhh, uhh," Malleo stuttered, twisting his head three times. "He did it!" He then pointed to the nearby Starfy, who missed the entire crime. The Shy Guy looked at Malleo, then at Starfy, and back at Malleo before shouting "Catch that sea star!" He chased the star, who tried to flee.

"What am I being chased by a cop for?!" Starfy whined. "I want my lawyer!"

"Well, that was awkward," the Mario clone sighed. "Either way, let's get shit done!"

**XxXx**

"Just look at all this stuff!" Eggman told his robot ally. "Look, this bell is just like the one in your seat in the Egg Mobile! Let's buy it!"

"Quit embarrassing me," Metal Sonic commanded.

"I knew you would like it!" Eggman said as grabbed the bell. "Ooooohhhh, look at that! Pink paint to brighten up your seat!"

"I wonder if you are torturing me, or if you are just an incompetent moron," Metal sighed before he went down the weapons isle.

**XxXx**

"Waa-haa-haa!" Waluigi laughed as he ran through the mall, knocking over Sonic the Hedgehog in the process.

"Ow, what the-" the blue blur said before he saw that Waluigi had stopped to talk to this universe's Waluigi. "Oh shit, I need to tell Palutena about this!" He then ran off, leaving the two Waluigis be.

"Hi Waluigi!" Waluigi greeted his counterpart.

"Hi Waluigi! the counterpart repeated.

"Waluigi heard that Waluigi used to sell tacos," Waluigi said. "Can Waluigi please give Waluigi a taco?"

"Sure Waluigi!" the counterpart agreed as he gave Waluigi a taco. "Have a nice day, Waluigi!"

"You too, Waluigi!" Waluigi said before the two made their separated ways. The counterpart Waluigi took a few steps before he stopped, realizing something important.

"Wait a second!" he yelled. "My shoe's untied!"

**XxXx**

"All right, I will do your nails today," Rosalina told Malleo as he sat down in the large seat.

"I really need them done. I'm not sure if you'll be able to even look at them without falling apart," Malleo warned the space princess.

"Oh, they can't be that bad," Rosalina replied.

"OK, just don't say I didn't warn ya." Malleo then took his right glove off, exposing his disturbing hand. Rosalina's face turned pure green in disgust.

"Sweet... mother of... hentai..." the princess said before she fell to the ground unconscious. Malleo looked around the room, making sure no one else saw the incident.

"Hmmm... I wonder if I can do my own nails," the meme said as he grabbed a bottle of nail polish.

**XxXx**

"So, what exactly are you good at?" the manager of McDonald's, Tom Nook, asked Wario.

"Well..." Wario started as he had a small fart. "I'm good at farting, annoying people, making parodies of terrible songs, prank phone calls, being lazy, stealing money from my employers, and eating. Not the best résumé, I know, but-"

"HOLY SMOKES YOU'RE HIRED!" Tom interrupted as he dressed Wario in his new uniform. The manager then tossed him out into the kitchen.

"Gee, I had one heck of a résumé, and he still hired me?" Wario wondered as he made his way to the counter where people would place their orders. "What, are all of the employees around here way worse than I am?" He finally made it to the counter, and witnessed just what his fellow employees were like. One was holding a sign, which had the Wendy's logo on it, and ordered anyone who entered the store to go to Wendy's instead. He was currently yelling at Knuckles and Amy, telling them about their horrible restaurant, and how they should go to Wendy's. Meanwhile, an insane worker was busy stabbing a poor Pokémon trainer to death, blood splattering all over the table. Another employee was busy greasing up the floors, instead of cleaning it with water. A Gengar worked popped up right next to the yellow pest.

"We're the only sane workers here," the Pokémon warned him. Wario's pupils shrunk massively at this remark./p

**XxXx**

"Gotta go fast, gotta go tell Palutena!" Sonic said as the southern exit of the mall finally became visible. He was just about to open the doors when a sleeping dart struck him in the back of his head, causing him to spin around before falling to the floor.

"We meet again, faker," Shadow sneered as he grabbed the blue blur by the legs. "And this time, I have won." He then began to laugh evilly as he dragged Sonic away.

**XxXx**

"Come on Waluigi!" Tails shouted as he went through the isles of the new Hot Topic store. "Where are you?!" Tails looked around, and noticed Lana at the register, buying a manga magazine. Hearts began to fly around the fox as he gained a crush on the blue-haired girl. He quickly rushed up to her and began to kiss her all over the face.

"YAHH!" Lana screamed as people began to crowd around the two.

"Beastiality!" a Goomba screamed.

"It's Sonic 06 all over again!" Blaze the Cat shouted as she covered her eyes.

"Security!" a Wooper pleaded. Within seconds, two Waddle Dee security guards rushed in and grabbed the fox off of Lana. They then threw him out of the store, as well as Waluigi.

"Stay out of the Wallsworth!" one Waddle Dee proudly ordered.

"This is a Hot Topic, you moron!" the other chubby creature said.

"I know, but someone had to make a reference to an obscure movie!" the first Waddle Dee said as they went back inside the store.

"Waluigi! There you are!" Tails cheered.

"Why did you get kicked out of there for?" Waluigi inquired.

"I kissed some girl, who I now realize isn't all that attractive," the fox answered. "You?"

"I was touching someone," Waluigi said.

"I hope that's not in the way I think it is," Tails moaned as he got onto his feet.

"Of course not!" Waluigi protested as he got up. "I may be an idiot, but I am not a pervert! On another note, I'm already bored of this mall. Can you get out of here now?"

"Sure," Tails responded as the two began to walk away from the store.

"Say, isn't that our Tails and Waluigi?!" Snaked questioned Duck Hunt Dog.

"I think so," the dog replied. "Just to make sure, let's follow them."

"So, we're going to become stalkers?" Snake teased.

"Well, when you put it like that it sounds disturbing," Duck Hunt said as the two followed Waluigi and Tails. "Besides, you're the one who looks up women's dresses!"

"Touché," the soldier responded.

**XxXx**

"And that was Open Your Heart by Crush40, people!" the DJ of channel SuperMall64, Jet the Hawk, said into the microphone. "Coming up, we have "Seaside Hill Zone" and "Conquest Ablaze", followed by an interview with R.O.B., who will be expressing his opinions on the supposed fanfic barrier breaking, with our very own Ridley! Right after this five minute break." Jet got out of his eat and took off his headset, leaving it on the nearby table as the commercials began. He then left the room as Malleo slunk up from where the hawk was sitting in previously.

"Who puts a radio station inside a mall?" Malleo muttered. "Whatever. Most of my checklist is complete, but I still need to act stupid. And I know just the perfect plan to do so!" He then stopped the commercials and put in a DVD.

**XxXx**

"Ahh, that sure was a nice trip," Samurai Goroh said as he turned on the radio inside his Fire Stingray.

"And now, you will all listen to WAA-Conda, bitches!" Malleo shouted over the radio before the song began to play.

"My Pingas don't... my Pingas don't... my Pingas don't want none unless you got dinner, hun!"

"Oh my damn god, this song is effing terrible!" Goroh screamed before he crashed into the mall, resulting in a miniature explosion.

**XxXx**

The song began to play inside the McDonald's, causing the already insane employees to get worse. The Wendy's loving guy ran around the restaurant, spazzing about how this is all McDonald's fault. The murderer was about to stab a poor Goomba, but instead leaped out of the window, in order to escape the horrid song. The greaser began to slather his ears in grease. The customers began to run around and throw food at each other.

"What the Cowboy Lucario is going on here?!" Tom Nook demanded to know as he barged out of his office. Wario tackled him, in order to protect him from all of the flying projectiles being flung around the food establishment.

"It's a full scale riot, sir!" Gengar told his boss. "This song is making everyone act completely psychotic! Well, except for those insane workers you somehow bother to hire..."

"Hey, we didn't exactly have many options!" Tom argued. "Besides, you know how teenagers who work at McDonald's are!"

"As stupid as I am, even I know that this really isn't the best place to be debating!" Wario reminded them.

"You have a point," Tom responded as he got up. "We must evacuate in a calm and orderly manner!"

**XxXx**

"Would you just look at all this stuff we got!" Eggman gleefully said as he pushed a shopping cart filled with items out of the store. "And half of it is stuff you like! I know you so well!"

"Yep, you sure do," Metal Sonic sarcastically said as he walked behind his creator. Eggman began to sniff the air again, catching the scent of smoke. His ears also were filled with screams.

"Do you hear and smell that?" Eggman asked.

"Actually, I do," Metal replied as he held his right hand to his ear. "Sounds like mass panic."

"WAAAAA!" Wario screamed as he, Gengar, and Tom burst through the door of the nearby McDonald's. Many creatures of all kinds followed them, running away from the now burning restaurant.

"Oh, how I love mass panic!" Dr. Eggman squealed. "Wait a second... that's Wario!" After him!" The scientist and the robot gave chase after the three towards the northern end of the mall.

**XxXx**

"Waa-haa-haa!" Waluigi cheered as he and Tails exited the local GameStop. "I got Sims 3!"

"Since when have you been interested in the Sims?" Tails asked.

"Longer than you have known me, bro," Waluigi answered. "Hey, it's Wario!"

"Hey guys!" Wario gasped as he took of his McDonald's hat.

"What happened to you?" Tails wondered.

"A bunch of cruddy nonsense, I tell you hwut," Wario said as he put his regular hat on. "On the plus side, we got two more supporters for the WWE, by the names of Gengar and Tom Nook!"

"I always wondered why you decided to use the name WAA Weirdos Emissary," the fox muttered.

"On another note, the people here really seem to hate WAA-conda," the yellow pest added.

"What?! How dare they hate on the wonderful parodies we produce!" Waluigi shouted as he stomped his foot.

"On yet another note, I have a plan on stopping the Cute Toot House and Hot Topic Krew!" Wario said devilishly. "We're going to kidnap the goddess, Viridi!"

"Now, why in the Konkey Dong would we do that?!" Tails inquired.

**One Chapter 22 of the Cute Toot House later...**

"... And that's why we're kidnapping her!" Wario exclaimed.

"That story made my brain hurt," Tails remarked as he noticed Amy and Knuckles heading to a Wendy's together, squinting his eyes. "No way..."

"Waa. Now you know how I feel," Waluigi remarked as he folded his arms together, wondering what his counterpart in this universe was up to. He imagined his counterpart drawing up a wonderful comic called "Waluigi in the Family". Waluigi smiled at this as he came back to the real world.

"Wait, I just thought of something," Tails said. "Wario, how would you know that the people here hate your song?"

"It was oddly on the radio channel, SuperMall64. Why do you ask?"

"Because, it must mean that someone knows of our existence! We gotta head back to the Pizza Hut, stat!"

"Okie dokie!" Waluigi obeyed as the three ran back to the southern exit.

**XxXx**

Falco was up in the computer room of the Space Colony Ark's ruins, meddling with all of the many buttons on the control panel.

"Man, so many buttons, so little time!" the bird said as he continued his button mashing, as Crazy Hand floated into the room.

"Falco! Where is everybody, and where are we?" the giant hand asked.

"Up from that nightmare, I see," Falco smiled. "As far as I can tell, we are on the Space Colony Ark, and we're the only ones here."

"WHAT?!" Crazy panicked.

"Don't worry," Falco told his friend. "I'm sure we'll find a way to get onto the planet. "Let's see if this button does something!" He then pressed a large, red button, which sent a missile down to the Smash Mansion. "Yeeaahh, it does!"

"Uhhhh... what are we going to do about that missile?" Crazy asked.

"Nothing," Falco replied. "I mean, it's not like it's headed straight for one of our friends!"

**XxXx**

Weegee was sneaking out the back door of the Smash Mansion, ready to find Wario and the rest of the WWE.

"Now, let's see," Weegee thought out loud. "If I was Wario, where the hell would I be?" He then heard a grumble in the sky, and turned his attention to the clouds, noticing the missile. "Why the fuck do I feel like this is all Falco's fault?" The missile exploded right in front of the large mansion, and Weegee barely stood tall from the resulting high winds from the explosion. The winds died down as people ran out of the mansion, with many of them screaming. "Man, I thought that missile was going to hit me for sure!" The meme took a few steps away from the now barely standing mansion, before getting smashed by a large piece of scrap metal.

**XxXx**

"Where are they?!" Dr. Eggman asked, searching for the WWE members by the local Taco Bell. "We must find them!"

"I don't know, but since we are near the end of the chapter, we should expect some exciting event any second now," Metal Sonic said right before a large, wire net fell on the scientist. "Yep."

"Muhahaha!" a voice laughed. "It looks like you fell into my trap, fatty!"

"I-it's him!" Eggman stuttered.

"Yes, it is I! Dark Edgious Pit, leader of the Hot Topic Krew!"

"Next time, you will view the epic battle between Dark Pit and Metal Sonic! Who will win? Will the WWE ever fully reunite? What was Crazy Hand's nightmare about? Is Palutena a maniac?" a random voice said.

"If you don't know the answer to the last question, you're a moron," Metal responded.

"Tune in next time on, WAA Weirdos Emissary!"


	4. Ch 4: Metal Sonic VS Dark Pit

**Chapter 4: Metal Sonic VS Dark Pit**

"You will pay for this, Dark Pit!" Dr. Eggman shouted as he struggled to free himself from the wire trap. "Not only for this, but for what you did to my theme park!"

"Hmmph. I won't pay for anything, you fatass," Dark Pit smirked.

"Why you little..." Eggman muttered as he turned his head towards his minion. "Metal Sonic, get him!"

"As you wish," Metal obeyed. "You're going down, pathetic recolor."

"You're one to talk, Adjective Sonic!" Dark Pit insulted as he pulled out his Silver Bow.

"You're so on!" Metal Sonic shouted as he lunged for the angel. He landed successfully, but Dark Pit managed to shake him off swiftly. The robot managed to get up quickly before the edgy teen could stab him with the bow.

"You know, if you give up, I could let your friend there free," Dark Pit said.

"Please, like that's the truth," Metal Sonic replied. "I'm smart enough to not fall for garbage like that!" He curled up into a ball and leaped into the air, before quickly smashing into Dark Pit's face. The angel was sent skidding back a bit, nearly bumping into a wall. A little stream of blood fell from his mouth, but he ignored it. He fire a storm of arrows at the robot, who dodged most of them. One however, managed to strike the robot right above his eyes, leaving a small crack. Metal Sonic lunged for Dark Pit, while said angel did the same. The two stopped just before colliding, and they started dealing a flurry of lightning-fast punches on each other. The blows all blocked each other, rending them useless. Metal Sonic finally managed to strike an uppercut on his adversary, but at the cost of Dark Pit landing a hook jab on the robot as well. Dark Pit went flying up into the air before quickly smashing into the ground, while Metal was sent crashing through the nearby window of the local Taco Bell, scarring most of the current customers and workers there.

**XxXx**

Palutena, Toadette, Silver the Hedgehog, and Mario were roaming through the northern half of the mall, wanting to find Pit, who snuck away from them while they weren't looking.

"Why on Earth would Pit sneak away from us like that?" Toadette wondered as Palutena made a high pitched toot.

"He probably saw his boyfriend Mega Man while we were in SEARS," the goddess replied as she wafted the fart towards Mario. The red plumber caught the scent of it, and nearly puked at the smell.

"I should be used to this by now..." Mario thought to himself.

"I remember when they had sex at the Lincoln Memorial," Silver commented. "Damn, I really wish I could unsee that moment."

"Why can't you just accept the fact that they are in love with each other?" Toadette asked the hedgehog.

"I can accept it, but come on! Who in the hell would want to see an angel and a robot making love on a national memorial?!"

"Breaking news!" a nearby voice shouted. The group turned their heads towards the local TV store, noticing that all of the TVs were on the local news, channel 75. "All of the nudists roaming through the mall have all been murdered."

"What?!" the whole group exclaimed as they surrounded the TVs.

"The police believe that none other than Starfy committed the crime, though a few citizens claim that a hideous Mario impersonator is responsible. We managed to catch an interview with said impersonator, with his thoughts on the murder.

"Toadette looks very ugly naked," Malleo said as he appeared on the TVs. "Never look at her naked body!"

"What the..." Toadette muttered as she shook her head.

"The hell is this bullcrap?!" Silver added.

"Also breaking news, the local McDonald's at the mall has caught on fire just an hour ago. Thankfully, the firemen were successful in putting it out."

"The one we were just at two hours ago?!" Mario said in awe.

"It appears that it was caused by a riot from the customers, who were upset by some horrid song," the male news anchor added.

"OK..." Silver muttered as he pulled his long, silver quills.

"Even more breaking news, Samurai Goroh has just died in a car crash, unsurprisingly, at the mall's southern parking lot," the news man said.

"This mall's falling apart!" Toadette screamed.

"Keep calm," Palutena said. "We can handle this. Just as long as nothing else happens that's worse."

"Wahoo!" a surviving nudist yelled as he leaped in front of the quartet. "California girls, we're undeniable!"

"God damn it all, not this song!" Mario screamed as he and the rest of the group ran away from the ugly nudist. He continued to dance until Dark Pit crashed right into him.

"Thanks, fatass mother fucker," Dark Pit muttered as he got onto his pathetic feet.

"How did you know I fuck my mo- I mean, that's offensive!" the nudist cried.

"... Wow, you're beyond fucked up," Original the Angel said as he pulled out his staff. "Seriously, who fucks their own mother?!" Dark Pit then fired his staff into the ugly man's chest, leaving a huge, bloody hole in his body. The nudists eyes quickly shut tight as he died.

"Geez, you must be the king of the emos, huh?" Metal Sonic asked as he stood a few feet away from the angel, in a battle stance.

"Hell yeah I am," Dark Pit responded, only slightly turning his head. "And I'm about to show you the true power of us goths!" Prepare to go to hell, bitch!" He then made a 180 leap and began firing his staff at the alternative universe robot. Metal Sonic managed to use his quick feet to good use, and dodged all four shots. He then lunged for his opponent, seemingly ready to tackle him. Dark Pit got ready for the attack, but Metal Sonic vanished right before he landed his strike. Dark Pit kept an eye out for the robot, waiting for his return. Metal Sonic reappeared right behind his adversary and latched onto his wings, tugging harshly on them.

"How do you like this?!" Metal Sonic taunted as the angel fell to the ground in pain.

"AGGGHHH!" Dark Pit cried. "Don't think... you've won yet!" Dark Pit shook himself violently, attempting to send the robot flying. He finally succeeded a few seconds later, sending Metal into a flower pot. The angel fled as the robot got up.

"Coward!" Metal insulted before he gave chase.

**XxXx**

"WEEEEE!" Malleo squealed as he drove around the mall in a rocket-powered shopping cart. He nearly ran over the Koopa child Waluigi scared off of the mechanical horse earlier, before he noticed Snake and Duck Hunt Dog being chased by Princess Peach and another Snake, who was launching a storm of missiles at our heroes.

"I told you it was a bad idea to talk to your alternate self!" Duck Hunt shouted.

"Yeah, but who would have expected this to happen?!" Snake argued.

"This world will be filled with beautiful scents of all kinds, and there is nothing you fools can do about it!" Peach laughed.

"Well, I could look up your dress!" Snake said as he turned his head back towards their new foes.

"I'm such a pervert in that alternate universe thing, aren't I?" the other Snake replied.

"Hold it right there, you fiends!" Malleo ordered as he pulled up alongside the two villains.

"Who the fuck are you?!" the alternate Snake demanded to know.

"I AM MALLEO, GOD OF YOUTUBE POOP!" the meme said in an extremely manly voice. "Now, give up or else!"

"Or else what?" Peach taunted. "A purple robot from another dimension, driving a tub with a squid inside, will crush us?!

"I WAS TRIPPING DOWN THE STAIRS!" a voice shouted before the purple robot from our heroes' universe came crashing down on the two enemies. The squid, Squidward Q. Tentacles, was screaming as usual at the currently occurring events.

"Aw man, I was going to poison their water supply, burn their crops, and deliver a plague onto their houses!" Malleo moaned as he drove past the now dead Peach and alternate Snake.

"Can we talk about this later and ditch this place?" Duck Hunt Dog begged, as he and Snake were still running.

"Sure!" Malleo came to a complete stop, and his two allies leaped into the cart. "Hold onto your chocolate, cause this is going to be a bumpy ride!"

"Oh geez..." Snake muttered as Malleo started bolting through the mall again, leaving a trail of flames in his wake.

**XxXx**

"Keep running! He's onto us!" Wario commanded as he, Waluigi, and Tails were running away from the murderous McDonald's employee, who currently was wielding a chainsaw.

"Man, are all people in this universe like this?!" Tails wailed as he nearly tripped.

"No, just the people who work at McDonald's," Wario remarked. "Then again, all teenage workers suck in that food chain."

"I'll drink to that," Waluigi replied.

"Guahahaghllle!" the murderer laughed oddly as he got closer to the heroic trio.

"Can we please take care of this guy?!" Tails begged.

"Can do!" Wario responded as he pulled out the Dinner Blaster from his right pocket.

"How in Koridai did you manage to fit that thing in your pocket?" the fox inquired, curious about the weapon.

"Never underestimate the power of fanfiction, mai boi," the yellow pest answered as he began to run backwards. "Taste the wrath of dinner, you foul beast!" Wario launched a pile of spaghetti from his Dinner Blaster, hitting the worker right on his hands. Said hands caught on fire, causing the murderer to throw the chainsaw up into the air, before running into the local Subway owned by Mashiro Sakurai. The trio stopped running, finally able to catch their breaths.

"Phew!" Waluigi sighed as he leaned down forward. "That was... quite the workout."

"Huff... puff," Tails breathed. "Glad... that's over with."

"Come on... we need to... ditch this dump," Wario stuttered as he got up. The trio began to walk down to the southern end of the mall.

**XxXx**

"Run for your lives!" A Waddle Doo shouted as he and a group of all kinds of creatures ran out of the SEARS store. Inside, Metal Sonic and Dark Pit were still having their brawl.

"Just die already!" Metal yelled as he tried to attack Dark Pit with a kick, who managed to dodge said attack by ducking.

"Hell no, bitch!" Dark Pit responded as he got his back straight. "I won't lose to the likes of you damn preps! We emos shall win, and bring Hot Topic to it's former glory!"

"Also, is it possible that you could stop cursing so much?" Metal Sonic wondered as he blocked a punch with his arms. "I mean, think of the children!"

"Who gives a shit about the children?" Dark Pit asked as he withdrew his fist.

"I should have known he wouldn't have cared," Metal thought to himself. He sighed, jumping over a low sweep kick.

**XxXx**

"Good job on kidnapping Sonic," Mewtwo said to Shadow. The two were in the abandoned Chuck E Cheese's, with with a tied up and gaged Sonic sitting in front of them.

"Hhmph. It was only natural of me," Shadow boasted as he kicked the blue hedgehog. "Now, for part two of our plan!"

"Of course," Mewtwo replied. Shadow snapped his fingers, with a set of mechanical doors opening up a second later. Out of said doors walked a near look-a-like of Sonic, but with purple eyes.

"Sonic Robo, you must find the Cute Toot House and hang around with them," Shadow ordered. "When the time comes, you may attack them. But until then, you must act exactly like the real Sonic."

"Understood," the robot replied as his eyes turned into a copy of Sonic's. He turned to the real blue hedgehog and smirked. "So long, pathetic faggot." He then kicked the real Sonic, before marching out of the restaurant.

"I sure love his personality," Mewtwo commented.

"Hell yeah," Shadow smirked. "He's a true emo already."

"So, what do you suppose we do now?" the Pokémon asked.

"You go check on the leader's battle with that alternate universe Metal Sonic," Shadow said. "I'll catch up. First, I must take this fucker into the back closet."

"Rodger that," Mewtwo said before he teleported away.

**XxXx**

"Let's see..." Weegee muttered as he looked at a map of Station Square. "Wario's not at the Wal-Mart, the library, or the pool... where is he?!"

"Woah, so much shit going on at the mall!" a voice shouted. Weegee turned his head towards the TV section of the local Wal-Mart, noticing a huge crowd gathered around the flat screens.

"Glad I'm not there right now," a Motobug stated.

"This just in: the ugly Mario imposter claimed to have killed the nudists at the mall, is currently driving around there, causing complete chaos with Solid Snake and Duck Hunt Dog!" the news reporter said. "Here is a video of the imposter's antics, brought to us by one of our very few fans. The screens then switched to footage of Malleo, driving his shopping cart around the GameStop of the mall, knocking shelves over and running over people.

"God damn it Malleo!" Weegee said in rage. "What have you done now?!" the meme walked away, with a few faces staring at him.

**XxXx**

"What are you people doing?!" Dr. Eggman shouted, still stuck inside the wire net. "Can't you see that I'm stuck in here?!"

"Hey guys, look!" A Togepi said, pointing at Eggman. "A guy stuck in a net!"

"Let's see if he does something funny!" A Kritter replied as a group of creatures surrounded the fat scientist.

"You people are bafoons!" Eggman growled. "And I thought Orbot and Cubot were idiots. You fools take ignorance to a whole new level!" He looked around for a bit, until he noticed Palutena walking by. "Uh, Ms. Green Goddess Lady, over here!"

"Hm?" Palutena muttered, searching for the owner of the voice. "Oh, my apologizes, Dr. Robotnik! I didn't see you there!"

"No body calls me Robotnik anymore!" the doctor argued. "Anyway, can you please get me out of this net?"

"Sure thing!" Palutena said. She turned around and bent forward, preparing for a massive fart.

"Wait, what are you-" Eggman was interrupted by Palutena's fart, which disintegrated the net around him.

"Gross!" a Pooka shouted as many of the creatures ran away. The fog of the goddess's fart lingered for a few minutes, before clearing up.

"I told you these gas masks were a good idea," Toadsworth bragged to Big the Cat.

"Um, Robotnik?" Palutena asked as she noticed that Eggman's face was pure red. "Are you OK?"

"Mmmmmmmmmmraaahhh!" Eggman growled before he walked away from the scene, grumbling about something.

**XxXx**

"Now, you better be done with that slushy pretty quick!" Metal nagged at Dark Pit, who was slurping on the icy treat. "I don't have all day to waste on your hunger!"

"Yeah, yeah, idiot," the angel whispered as he gave Morshu ten Rupees for the slushy. He sat down on a nearby bench that had the recolor's staff leaning on it.

"Come back when your mmmmmmmm hungry again!" Morshu smirked as Dark Pit sat down. Meanwhile, Metal Sonic wandered away while no one was looking. He quickly ran into a young Waddle Dee carrying an ice cream cone. Metal then swiped the cone from the child.

"Hey, that's mine, jerk!" the creature whined. Metal Sonic growled at the young lass, causing her to run away, crying for her mother. The blue robot then tossed the ice cream cone down onto the floor.

"Oh no!" Metal yelled. "Someone dropped their sweet ice cream onto the floor!"

"Di-did somebody say FLOOR ICE CREAM?!" Dark Pit squealed. "Curse my non-edgy weakness!" He then leaped into the air, running still in the classic cartoon fashion, before he crashed right into the messy dairy product. Metal Sonic swiftly dashed for his foe's staff and grabbed it.

"Now, how do you use this piece of junk?!" The robot grumbled as he tinkered with the machine, unknowingly firing it on accident. He heard a crash and looked up, finding Dark Pit unconscious. "Oh... that's how." He then caught the scent of a horrid odor, and covered his nose in response. "What the Buzz Bomber is that smell coming from?!"

"That would be from me," Eggman answered as he approached his creation. "Don't ask where I got it."

"I certainty don't want to know, geez!" Metal complained. A rumbling noise filled both of their ears, causing them to look around.

"OK, wha-" Eggman and Metal Sonic were grabbed and pulled into the rocket-powered cart, now with Wario, Waluigi, and Tails in it too.

"Hold on to your Pingas!" Wario cheered as the cart made it's way out of the mall.

"Come on! Does everyone have to bring up that meme?!" Dr. Eggman whined as the cart left the parking lot.

**XxXx**

"Shit, not again!" Mewtwo cursed as he found his leader on the floor. "Not only did he fall for the ice cream trick again, he's also been eating that un-edgy shit from Morshu's!"

"Take that back, you dick face!" Morshu insulted from his ice cream stand.

"Why the fuck should I listen do you?!" Mewtwo taunted.

"I do not accept your shitty behavior," the fat salesman replied. "You will die at the hands of me!"

"Yeah, you and what army?!" the Pokémon smirked.

"Bombs!" Morshu shouted as he threw a bomb at the Pokémon.

"What the fu-" was all Mewtwo could say before the bomb detonated.

"BOOM!" a mysterious voice shouted as bits of the roof flung away from the mall. All of the stores near Morshu's Ice Cream Stand were ablaze, and people were running for their worthless lives. Morshu's stand was thankfully fire-proof, so it was perfectly fine.

"Fuck yeah!" Morshu yelled at the now unconscious Mewtwo, giving two middle fingers to the poor Pokémon. "Don't mess with Morshu!" Mashiro Sakurai slunk up right next to the salesman.

"Yes, I'm still alive," Sakurai said as Morshu noticed his presence.


	5. Ch 5: Walutena, Horrible Clone

**Chapter 5: Walutena, Horrible Clone**

"God damn it all!" Mewtwo roared as he smashed his fists on the table. "That Morshu bitch will pay for my injuries!"

"Calm down," Shadow said, passing a pouch of Capri-Sun to his somewhat injured ally. "We'll get your revenge at a later time. For right now, we need to focus on those alternate universe freaks."

"Shadow, don't be wasting those pouches," Wolf joined in. "Our supply is very finite, and we were lucky to have found that box earlier.

"Calm your furry tits, Wolf," Mewtwo said as he took a breather from his drink. "One pouch a day will last us at least for about four months or so."

"Whatever, low tier," Wolf grumbled. "Back to those guys you were rambling about, Shadow."

"Of course." Shadow pulled out a picture of the WWE members at the mall earlier and laid on the table for his allies to see. "So far, we know that there is a Wario, Waluigi, Tails, Snake, Duck Hunt Dog, some Mario faker, Dr. Eggman, and Metal Sonic here. Possibly even more."

"They're just a bunch of dumbasses. Big deal," Mewtwo remarked.

"True as that may be, they are very powerful," Wolf said. "Most of the damage to this hellhole today were caused by those preps. I'm surprised this mall is still standing."

"Exactly," Shadow added. "If we don't act, we'll get our own asses handed to us... and I mean that figuratively and literally."

"So, what the hell are we going to do? Kidnap one of their members and send out a robot clone of them like we did with Sonic?" Mewtwo said before he took another sip of his illegal drink.

"Speaking of the devil, how's that plan going?" Wolf asked Shadow.

"Quite well, as far as I know," the hedgehog proudly replied. "But, we should check on Sonic Robo."

"Whatever," Wolf said as the three got up from the table and headed for an old Pac-Man arcade machine. Shadow inserted a penny, and the machine began to work.

"Making this machines into super computers was the only good thing fatass Cia ever did... unless you count sitting like the lazy piece of shit she was as "good"," the Pokémon commented.

"Mewtwo, can't you give it a damn rest?!" Shadow impatiently asked.

"Looks like that Cunt Toot House are in the southern country side of Station Square," the humanoid wolf commented as he took a look at the screen, which now had Sonic Robo's point of view on it.

"Haha, Cunt Toot House," Mewtwo chuckled. "Sounds like something I would say."

"It is something you would say," Shadow sighed.

**XxXx**

The WWE were back in their Pizza Hut Hideout, except for Waluigi and Tails, who were out spying on the Cute Toot House.

"When are they gonna get here?" Snake inquired Wario. "I want to start interrogating that Eggman right now."

"I already told you, we are here to give that Hot Topic Krew what for!" Dr. Eggman butted in.

"Just be patient Snake," Wario said. "Waluigi called me an hour ago, saying he would be back soon."

"And now I am here!" Waluigi yelled as he and Tails ran down the stairs.

"Hey, young fellows!" Mermaid Man greeted.

"Now can we start the interrogation?" Snake asked.

"Sure, why not?" Wario responded as he scratched his butt. "Alright, Egghead, what are you-"

"FOR THE OVER 9000TH TIME, I AM HERE TO KICK THE HOT TOPIC KREW'S BUTTS!" Eggman shouted so loudly that the entire town of Station Square could hear.

"Gee, no need to be so cranky!" Malleo commented.

"So, that's it?" Duck Hunt questioned. "We're supposed to believe this villain's story?"

"Well, Eggman's a wimp," Tails stated. "Even if he is lying and is up to something, we can kick his butt."

"I feel like I'm in some sort of torture porn right now!" Dr. Robotnik growled as his face turned pink.

"Welcome to my world," Metal Sonic muttered.

"Either way, whether or not Eggman isn't lying, we could use his help right now," Mermaid Man suggested.

"Fine," Wario responded. "No funny tricks though, Eggman!"

"You have my word," Eggman promised. "I just want those pathetic emos to suffer for what they have done."

"Hey, WAA Weiros Whatever!" Vector shouted as he appeared on the giant computer screen.

"What is it, Vector?" Waluigi questioned.

"Some creepy guy here has something to say to you," the croc answered.

"Bring him on the screen!" Wario commanded. The screen then shifted from Vector to a familiar meme.

"Weegee!" Malleo cheered.

"Glad to see you guys, but I have some big news," Weegee seriously said. "I just spotted the Cute Toot Whores heading this way on my way here!"

"Haha, Cute Toot Whores," Malleo laughed. "Sounds like something Mewtwo would say."

"Wait, what?" Duck Hunt Dog asked.

"Forget about that!" Wario demanded. "So, anyone got any ideas on what to do?"

"You mean you don't have any?!" Tails shouted.

"Hey, I'm just the leader," Wario argued. "All I have to do is give orders and have you guys do what I want."

"That's not how it goes," Malleo replied.

"I just say we attack them!" Weegee suggested. "I have a new weapon to test out anyways."

"You heard the man!" Wario turned around to his allies. "Move, move, move!" The entire emissary fled the hideout and went upstairs to the Pizza Hut.

***One 1966 Batman styled scene transition later***

The WWE were hiding behind a large bush, now accompanied by Weegee. Wario peeked his head out to try and find the CTH.

"So, what's this new weapon you got?" Snake asked.

"Oh, it's a multipurpose ray!" Weegee replied as he pulled said weapon out from his pocket. It has a freeze ray, an antimatter ray, a shock ray, a fart ray, and even a ray ray!"

"Even I find the idea of a "ray ray" to be ridiculous, and I'm extremely stupid," Waluigi muttered.

"We all do," Wario added, still searching.

"I got it from some shifty guy down by that Seaside Hill Zone that they're rebuilding," the meme continued. "A certain Seaside Hill that a certain someone destroyed!"

"You won't let me live that one down, will you?" Malleo frowned.

"Shhhh, I see them!" Wario whispered as Palutena, Silver, Mario, Zelda, Ness, and Sonic Robo came into view.

"Did you seriously have to do that, Ness?" Silver said from across the street.

"What? That guy did say, "kick the baby"!" Ness argued.

"Does any ones else get the feeling that something plot relevant is about to happen?" Zelda wondered.

"Ready to try out that new weapon of yours, Weegee?" Wario asked.

"Alright, just let me get this thing set to the right ray," the meme responded. He began to tinker with the machine, unable to find the proper ray. "God damn it, where the hell is that shock ray?"

"Waa," Waluigi sighed as Weegee continued to fiddle with his contraption. The purple pest then decided to poke his head out of the bush, to see what idiotic things the CTH were up to. The first thing he saw however, was a shiny, new penny. His irises turned into golden dollar signs, as his desire for the coin grew. "I want that penny!"

"Waluigi, don't do it!" Wario begged, but it was too late. Waluigi had leaped out of the WWE's hiding spot and ran across the street.

"I think I found it!" Weegee exclaimed as he poked his head and weapon out of the bush. The rude and evil meme pulled the trigger, thrilled that he was finally going to get some action.

"I can't watch," Tails whimpered as he hid behind Snake.

"What is Waluigi doing?" Silver questioned as said purple pest had landed right in front of Palutena, who was standing in front of the penny.

"Gotcha!" Waluigi cheered as he pinched the penny, right before he and Palutena got shocked from the ray gun.

"What the heck?!" Ness screamed.

"Damn it Waluigi, what the hell are you doing?!" Weegee cursed.

"That better not kill him!" Wario shouted as his anger began to grow.

"Of course it wo-" Weegee was cut short by an explosion, which sent Waluigi flying back to the WWE's hiding spot.

"Are you OK?!" Duck Hunt Dog panicked as he crawled to his friend.

"Yeah, I think so," the plumber muttered as he sat up. "Was that one of Wendy's pennies? Cause it pinched back."

"This is not the time for references, bud!" Wario replied as the high winds died down. "Check this out!" The rest of the emissary poked there heads through the bush, noticing that the CTH had vanished, and in their place was a giant burst of aura, with a tall, dark figure in the fiddle. The aura died, revealing the figure to look nearly like Palutena, except that her long dress was now purple instead of white, and her long, green hair was now short and brown.

"W-what the-" Malleo stuttered before the character turned around, showing it's face. The WWE's mouths hung agape, shocked at the newcomer's facial features. The newcomer had an exact replica of Waluigi's face, with no feature out of place.

"Waahaa! Good rhyme there, narrator!" the character laughed before it's gaze went to the emissary. "Greetings, pathetic idiots! Bow in my glory!"

"What the living hell is that ugly thing?!" Weegee gasped, wanting to throw up.

"Some ugly little critter, ain't she?" Waluigi added. Everyone turned their heads to the purple moron, giving him confused looks.

"... Are you serious right now?" the newbie pondered.

"Well, yeah!" Waluigi answered. "I mean, that dress is so ratchet! Even a diaper is more 2015 than that hunk of junk!"

"What?" Tails sputtered as he began to spin around in circles, unable to take much more confusion.

"... Well then. I am the great Walutena!" the newcomer proudly shouted. "You shall all bow to me, as I am your future ruler!"

"Not without a fight you won't! We'll take you on!" Wario roared as he leaped out of the hiding spot.

"Ha! Like you would stand much of a chance against an ultimate overlord like me!" Walutena mocked. It flicked Wario on the nose, causing the yellow plumber to grow angry. "I tell you hwut: if you feel like battling me so much, come meet me at my super secret lair I will have built in two hours... if you will ever find it, that is!" Walutena laughed, before throwing out a bomb filled with stinky gas right beneath itself, sending the evil amalgamate all the way to the high skies above.

"Woah! Not even I can handle this stench!" Wario coughed as he ran towards the Pizza Hut's front doors.

"I guess that was a cloning ray of some sort!" Weegee wheezed. Wario swung the door open, letting the rest of the members into the restaurant. Everyone kept gagging on the horrid stench as Vector, Espio, and the newly employed Gengar approached our heroes.

"What in Davey Jones' Locker is that smell?!" Vector inquired as he plug his long alligator nose.

"It's the stench of some ugly bitch called "Walutena" and their bomb," Snake said after taking a huge breath.

"That gas makes even Wario's farts smell bearable!" Eggman added. "I think this Waloser character might just be a bigger threat than the Hot Topic Krew."

"Hey, take that back, loser!" Wario groaned.

"You got that right!" Vector responded to Eggman as he unplugged his nose. "This stench could ruin my business!"

"That should be the least of your worries," Weegee muttered as he sat down on the floor.

"Espio and Gengar, you call everyone you know and tell them about this criminal!" The crocodile ordered, ignoring the meme's comment.

"Roger!" Espio obeyed as he ran out of the room.

"Wario, what are you guys gonna do?" Gengar asked his new friend.

"We're going to find this fiend and bring him to justice!" Wario exclaimed as he smashed his right fist into his left hand. "Or her... whatever gender that thing was."

"Does that thing even have a gender?" Metal Sonic commented as Gengar went into the back room. He was really worried about this new adversary, and was unsure about the future.

**XxXx**

"What the hell was that?!" Shadow screamed as Sonic Robo's point of view grew dark on the arcade machine.

"Shit, I think that shit excuse of a shit plan is in some deep shit," Mewtwo said.

"World record for the amount of times shit has been used in a sentence officially broken," Lucina commented as she entered the room.

"This is no times for gags, woman!" Wolf shouted. "We have a miniature crisis here!"

"Lucina, you go out and search for Sonic Robo!" Shadow commanded. "Mewtwo, you go tell Dark Pit about this!"

"Who the hell put you charge?" Mewtwo questioned.

"Now's not the time, you now penis-less freak!" Wolf growled as he held his claws right up to the Psychic Pokémon's neck.

"Wait, Mewtwo actually had a dick?" Lucina wondered.

"Yeah, but you needed a microscope to see it anyways, so you really couldn't tell," Wolf teased.

"You son of a dick, I should kill you for that!" Mewtwo shouted.

"At least I have a dick," the space furry mocked.

"You won't have one either if you keep wasting time, punk!" Shadow shouted. Wolf gulped and took a few steps back from Mewtwo, not wanting to end up in his fate.

**XxXx**

Falco was once again wandering through the Space Colony Ark. He was rather tired, but he still managed to find his way through the giant space station. He yawned as he walked into the control room again, finding Crazy Hand asleep again. The hand twitched and turned, causing the bird to believe that Crazy was experiencing another nightmare. Falco sighed, feeling bad for his friend, as he laid down on the hard floor.

"I wonder what he is dreaming about," Falco whispered as he closed his eyes.

**XxXx**

It was a barren, red wasteland inside Crazy's dream. Storm clouds brewed overhead, ready to unleash their fury any second. Many corpse laid on the ground, rotting away. Screams could be heard from all over. One said scream came from a certain goddess.

"Yaaaahhhh!" Palutena cried as her body smashed face-first into the ground. Blood leaked out from her cuts, which covered her entire body. A giant, red left hand loomed over the goddess, and laughed at her misery.

"You have failed, Palutena!" the giant hand taunted. "You and your pathetic Cute Toot House, all dead! Now the only ones who oppose me are those idiotic members of the WAA Weirdos Emissary and the remains of the Hot Topic Krew!" The hand looked off to the distance, noticing the sun rising in the far east. "But they will meet the same fate as you! Because I am the ultimate god! I am Death Hand!" With that, the monster floated off to the sunrise as the world grew dark.

Sadly, this would soon become more than a dream.

**XxXx**

Walutena was on one of the many balconies that were built onto the ugly clone's flying fortress. It sighed as it pulled out a rocket launcher. The villain pointed the weapon carefully, before launching a rocket down upon the Onett circus. Screams of all kinds were heard as everyone at the circus fled from the scene.

"Ahhh, the sweet scent of death," Walutena sighed in relief as it tossed the rocket launcher aside. "Oh, and roasting peanuts, that's a great smell too."

"My WAA-derful leader!" a voice shouted. Walutena turned it's head to see a Tharja clone with Waluigi's face approaching.

"What is it, Watharja? I need to get back to causing death!" Walutena grumbled as it turned it's whole body towards the newcomer.

"Just wondering where we should hide once the sun rises," Watharja asked.

"Oh," Walutena replied. The ugly clone scratched it's chin, thinking about a good hiding spot. A lightbulb popped up above the villain's head in a cartoon fashion as the clone got an idea. "We'll head to that Seaside Hill Zone in the morning. It's the best place I can think of."

"Wait, you can think? I thought you were brainless!" Watharja commented.

"What was that?!" Walutena roared as it grabbed the rocket launcher and pointed it at the other hideous clone.

"Uh, uh," Watharja stuttered. "I mean, tacos give me bad gas!"

"... What?" Walutena shook it's head and put down the weapon down, deciding it was for the best to just change the subject. "Never mind. Just go and order me some McDonald's. My stomach is in need of a Big Mac... or ten."

"Fine," Watharja responded as it walked away. "See you later, beautiful master!" The ugly clone sighed, glad to be by itself again. It looked down on the city below and laughed.

"Soon, this will be all mine," Walutena chuckled. "This, and way much more. Those moronic fools at the WAA Weirdos Emissary don't stand a chance against my glorious power. They will fail, I will kill them, and then I shall rule this whole planet! Muhuhahahahaha-" Walutena choked in the middle of it's laugh. "Gah! I tink I swallowed tah buggg!" The villainous, unknown gendered clone kept gagging for a few moments, until it finally spit out a fly. "Gods, sometimes it sucks to be a comic relief villain."

**XxXx**

"Man, what the heck went on earlier?" Silver muttered as he found himself back inside the remains of the Smash Mansion.

"All I remember is that Waluigi jumped for that penny before some eexplosion sent us flying," Zelda replied as she scratched her head.

"This world is getting more and more fucked up," Sonic Robo said.

"Well, at least we're home, where everything is safe and sound," Palutena said before she randomly threw a bomb filled with mustard gas, causing the whole room to fill with... well, noxious gas.

"Sure Pal, safe and sound," Silver sarcastically said as he covered his nose, while everyone else gagged on the awful smell.


	6. Ch 6: Seaside Denial

**Chapter 6: Seaside Denial**

Wario grumbled as the alarm clock sitting next to his bed achieved. He smashed the clock with his fist, shattering it completely. He dragged himself out of the maze of blankets covering him and sat on the right edge of his bed. He noticed that most of the WAA Weirdos Emissary had woken up and out of the room, with Weegee and Snake being the only others asleep.

"It's about time you woke up, pal," Waluigi said as he entered the bedroom.

"Ah, shut up," Wario replied as put on his yellow hat. "So, any luck on locating that Walutena?"

"We think so," his purple friend stated. "It's somewhere in the Seaside Hill Zone. Wake those two up and we can head there."

"Heh, with pleasure!" Wario obeyed as he turned his butt towards the two sleepy heads. "Three, two, one... BOOM!" He then unleashed a massive fart, waking up the duo in an instant.

"OH GODS IT BURRRRNNNNNNSSSSS!" Weegee screamed as he ran into the wall.

"Wario, why the hell would you do this?!" Snake demanded to know as he covered his mouth with his elbow.

**XxXx**

"So, this is the place?" Snake inquired Eggman as the group made it to the gates that surrounded Seaside Hill.

"Of course it is, just follow my lead!" the fat scientist answered as he tugged slightly on the left side of his long mustache.

"All right, boys!" Wario raised his voice to get everyone's attention. "We must find Walutena's lair before sundown, or else we might lose her! Or him!"

"I say we take it out here where the light is better and check it's gender!" Metal Sonic suggested.

"Random reference is random," Waluigi said. "Let's just get this over with."

"Musical number time!" Malleo cheered as he pulled out his portable stereo.

"Wait, w-what?!" Weegee stuttered at Malleo's sentence. "I hate musical numbers!"

**XxXx**

The Seaside Hill theme began to play inside of Walutena's fortress, as said clone finally finished writing on a piece of paper.

"Attention everyone! In three days, I will unleashed my ultimate fart on the world! Think you can stop me, WAA Weidros Emissary?" Walutena read out loud to Watharja.

"Terrible," Watharja commented.

**XxXx**

Wario: Let's go guys, we got a song we're parodying! (Wario is running along the beach, with Waluigi picking up Weegee not far behind him.)

Weegee: Waluigi, what in the hell are you doing?!

Waluigi: I'm going to throw you towards the hot sun!"

Weegee: Wait, what, NO! (Waluigi throws Weegee into a nearby cliff.)

Waluigi: Waa, waa, waa! No more things to throw left!

Wario: Stop it Walu, poor Weegee's bleeding to death! (Wario runs back towards his pal, while Waluigi picks up a bomb.)

Waluigi: Just a sec. I have one more thing to throw! (Waluigi throws the bomb at the same cliff, which blows off the top of the cliff, which sent Silver, Toadette, and Fox, who were on said cliff, to random directions across the beach.)

Shadow: I can't see the point of this quest. We likely meet a grave fate! (Shadow crushes an apple with his hand as Fox flies far behind him.)

Mewtwo: Oh come on Shad, be more depressed. (Shadow gets surrounded by a bunch of flowers.)

Morshu: Worthless fucking edgeheads. Bombs, annihilate! (Morshu throws a barrage of bombs at the two HTK members, sending them flying.)

Tails: I wish I could fly all dang day. (Tails is flying over the sea, with Duck Hunt and Snake, the latter using a phone with one hand, hanging onto his feet.)

Duck Hunt Dog: Ugggh! Snake, stop looking up hentai! (Duck Hunt looks down at the soldier, noticing what was on his phone.)

Snake: I was just noticed by senpai!

Dr. Eggman: Where are the others, can't be far? (Eggman, with Metal Sonic and Malleo, are standing on a large pillar.)

Metal Sonic: Who cares where the others are?

Malleo: Let's just drive that swagalicious car! (The trio climb into a golden car with the words "Swag" and the front doors and drive off as they stick their heads out of the windows. They now wear black sunglasses on their faces.)

Some Random Guy: Heavy and Bomb slept with Gardevoir!

Weegee: Wario, look, there's walkers in the ocean! (Wario's group are on another cliff overlooking the sea, which had zombies swimming towards the shore.)

Waluigi: Let's run into them!

Wario: NO! Don't wanna cause a commotion! Sorta brings back frightening memories too! (A thought bubble pops up next to the yellow idiot, depicting him surrounded by clones of Wisconsin governor Scott Walker.)

Omochao: Jump makes you jump, press the button to jump! (Eggman's group are running on a cliff, with the Chao robot flying around them.)

Metal Sonic: What button? (The group come to a halt to think.)

Malleo: Hey guys, I peed on that stump! (Malleo points to a nearby stump, which is dripping with urine.)

Omachao: Omachao will repeat!

Fat Pikachu: I'm confused! (Fat Pikachu punches himself in the face, before Dr. Meowth picks the fat rodent up.)

GengarFan3: My brain has melted, what have I done?! (LF3 and Yoshizilla are sitting on a bench right next to Waluigi's Taco Stand.)

Yoshizilla: Come on, I think this song is number one!

GeneralDarkPit: Now I see you, and now you're gone! (GDP shoots LF3 and Yoshizilla with a very edgy machine gun, causing the duo to run away.)

Snake: This fanfic makes sense, not one bit. (Snake is crawling through the sands of the beach, with DHD and Tails walking right behind him.)

Tails: Too bad, deal with it.

Duck Hunt Dog: Don't touch that hermit! (Snake sits up, before a hermit crab pinches his expanded dong.)

Cheese: Listen all you morons, I just murdered Justin Bieber! That dumbass goddess is holding you back, yo! In my opinion, you should leave her! (Cheese the Chao, with his words translated solely for the readers of this horrid fan fic, does an epic breakdance in front of Palutena, Cream the Rabbit, and Tiny Kong, before his words are no longer translated.) Oka me o mak, sing!

Cream: He wants you to sing!

Palutena: Isn't that cute! (Palutena bends over and turns around.) Singing time!

Mermaid Man: I'll make you mute! (Mermaid Man swings a Home-Run Bat, and then smashes it into the goddess' face, sending her soared as the iconic "KRRRRIIIINNNGGG!" sound plays.)

Shadow: I've had enough of this. Chaos Control! (A red aura surrounds Shadow, and a massive swiss roll appears over Shadow, Mewtwo, Lucina, and Wolf.)

Wolf: The fuck, that's a giant ass swiss roll! (The roll quickly falls to the ground.)

Lucina: What use is that?!

Shadow: It's gonna crush us all!

Mewtwo: Ow, ow, ow! (The swiss roll crushes the group of goths.)

Vector: OK, fly us to the swiss roll, Charmy! (Vector points to the swiss roll on top of a heavy cliff.)

Espio: Uh, boss? Can we just head to Arbby's? (Charmy lifts Espio and Vector over the gap that stands between them and the roll.)

Charmy: No way, dude! Swiss Rolls are too tasty!

**XxXx**

"That was the worst parody I have ever heard," Weegee muttered as he, Wario, Waluigi, Tails, and Metal Sonic walked along the beach.

"I think I lost brain cells from that," Tails muttered.

"As terrible as that song was, our top priority should be finding Walutena's fortress," Metal Sonic said, stopping in his tracks.

"He's right!" Wario said as the rest of the group stopped. "I mean, that fortress isn't just going to fall out of the sky, you know?"

"Are you sure about that, Wario?" Waluigi questioned his moronic pal. "Cause it looks like something huge is plummeting to the ground over there!"

"What?" Tails said before the entire ground shook, just enough to cause Weegee to fall down in the sand. It lasted for a few moments, dying down slowly. The rest of the pack turned their heads towards the direction that Waluigi was facing, noticing a large, black castle on a nearby cliff.

"Seven out of ten, too much irony," Weegee said, referencing a certain website.

**XxXx**

Falco and Crazy Hand were in the control room of the Space Colony Ark, sitting at a table made from metal scraps that the duo had found on the space station.

"So let me get this straight," Falco said as stretched his wings back. "Some monster called Death Hand will be created within the near future, will kill all of the Cute Toot House and most of the Hot Topic Krew, and will conquer this entire planet below us?"

"Yes," Crazy responded. "I'm really scared, Falco. He'll come for us, and rip us apart! What do we do?!"

"Don't panic, Crazy," Falco ordered. He sighed, knowing what this meant. Crazy Hand had the strange ability to see into the future through his dreams on the great occasion. Usually, whenever the world was threatened by a powerful force, such as the Subspace Emissary. Falco had no doubt in his mind that Crazy was telling the truth. "We'll stop that Death Hand, I know of it. But, we need some help in doing so."

"But who? Who in this universe could be able to help us?" The giant hand inquired, twitching his fingers wildly.

"Think Crazy," Falco replied. "We're dealing with a hostile, red, dictator hand really out for blood. What is the first word that comes to your mind when you hear those words?"

"Ed- Wait! Falco, you don't mean..."

"Yes." Falco took a deep breath, knowing what he was about to say would be difficult to believe, but it was the truth none the less. "We need to fight Dragon types with Dragon types. We need the help of the Hot Topic Krew."

**XxXx**

Back at Smasher's Palace in the WWE's universe, Lucario was sitting in the recliner that sat in in his room, reading the local paper. Pikachu and Ness were playing cards on the Aura Pokémon's bed, while Lucina was busy watching the TV.

"Guys, I'm really worried for those guys who went to that alternate universe," Lucina said with worry crawling up her spine.

"We all know that you're only worried for them because of that weird crush you have on Waluigi," Lucario grunted. "Besides, I'm sure they are fine. I mean, they have Weegee, Duck Hunt, Snake, and Tails with them."

"Now that I think of it, didn't Master Hand give them a communicator?" Ness wondered, keeping his eyes on his cards.

"Exactly," Lucina replied. "And Master Hand claims that he has yet to hear any word from him. Lucario took his eyes off of the paper, beginning to worry himself.

"Maybe you're right. Maybe they are in trouble." Just then, the news station on TV grew in volume as the "Breaking News" siren rang.

"This just in!" the news anchor, a random Chatot, exclaimed. "At the Red Mountain Zone in Mobius, a very unusual Pichu has been sighted, cursing up a storm and claiming he will get his revenge."

"Turn it up," Master Hand ordered as he entered the room, along with Shadow, Luigi, and Villager entered the room. Lucina obeyed, turning the volume of the TV up to max through the use of the remote.

"Thank you, Chatot," Daisy said sternly as the screen went to live footage at the Red Mountain. "I am here with the Pokémon himself, ready to hear what he has to say." The camera moved down as Daisy bent over to get face-to-face with the Pichu. "Little sir, why are you doing all of this?"

"I am sick of the bullshit! I am sick of being treat like a miserable piece of crap!" the Pichu on TV roared.

"We all go through that phase, mah boi," the Pichu of the Smashers replied, nibbling on some popcorn.

"But, now I'm stronger!" the other Pichu shouted. "You may have thought I was dead, but I only got stronger! You hear me, you pieces of shit?! I will come back to our universe and kick your asses for the constant insults! I will fuck you up, Legion of Stupid Eggs!"

"Alright, I think it's time for you to settle down, little guy..." Daisy chuckled.

"Fuck off, whore!" the TV Pichu screamed as he fired a beam of electricity from his hand, which shot through the princess' chest, killing her. The cameraman dropped the camera and ran away from the scene.

"Sweet Hylia, get me out of here!" said cameraman whailed. The screen then went back to Chatot, whose face was frozen in horror. The same was true for the Smashers, who had all caught the murder with their own eyes, as they were either in the room with Lucario and Co., or had seen the incident on their own TVs.

"What the hell?!" Marth shouted.

"Uh, M-master Hand?" Pikachu stuttered in fear. "Didn't Wario mention something about a Legion of Stupid Eggs before he left?"

"Close, he said "Legion of Super Evil"," Master Hand corrected the tiny Pokémon. "But... that Pichu worries me regardless."

"Master Hand, as crazy as it seems, I must go find Wario," Lucario said as he got up from his chair. "As much torture he puts me through every single day I spend here, I can't let a fellow Smasher get into so much danger without me there to help them."

"Well, we would let you if we had any extra vehicles left, but we don't," Master Hand sighed.

"Hold everything," Samus ordered as she walked her way through the cluster of Smashers that filled the entire room. "Lucario can borrow my Gunship if he really needs to go."

"Does Lucario even know how to pilot that thing?" Dark Pit grumbled as he tried to squirm his way through the Smashers and all the way to the door.

"Samus gave me some training over the years I have spent here," the Aura Pokémon answered. "I may not be an extreme expert, but I should be just fine piloting it." Lucario turned back to Samus, ready to continue speaking. "You have the backup keys?"

"Of course," Samus responded as she held out a pair of keys, which Lucario quickly swiped with his left hand.

"You'll also need a communicator," Master Hand added as he held a small, black device. Lucario grabbed this with his other hand, and began walking out the door as the Smashers in the room cleared the way for the blue Pokémon.

"Lucario, won't your presence in that alternate universe cause a massive amount of confusion?" Pikachu questioned as he leaped off of the bed.

"And Wario and Waluigi's presences haven't already?" Lucario replied, still walking towards the door.

**XxXx**

"Let's see what the hell is on TV," the evil Walutena grumbled as it sat down in a nice, comfy, red recliner. It picked up the remote that laid on the table in between the recliner and the HD television, and used said remote to turn the TV on.

"Next up on the Stupidity R Us channel, we will have the wrestling match of the year! Tom the Fish VS Doc Louis! Who will win the title if the Chocolate Master? Will people actually watch this? Why am I wearing a tampon? Find out here on channel 666, Stupidity R Us!" the TV boomed.

"Wow, a wrestling match actually worth watching? On Stupidity R Us, no less? What is this sorcery?!" Walutena cheered. A creaking sound could be heard after Walutena's rejoice, which came from Watharja entering the door.

"Your majesty, Wario and his minions have invaded the area of Seaside Hill Zone," the second-in-command said with grief.

"How can we help?" Walutena groaned as it turned its head towards the dark mage.

"It is written, that only Walutena can defeat Wario," Watharja continued.

"OK, for one, that part is a fucking lie," the disgusting clone argued. "And two, why in the living hell are we roleplaying as King Harkinian and Gwonam?!"

"I thought it would be fun!" Watharja replied, scratching the back of its head. "Besides, what is our pathetic army of Waluigi clones going to do, stall them?!"

"As long as they stall them enough so that I can watch that entire match between Tom and Louis, I am perfectly OK with that!" Walutena shouted as it turned back to the TV. "I want to see Tom preform the Wumbo Combo on that fat idiot who steals people's bikes!"

"Wumbo Combo?" the mage wondered.

"You know, I Wumbo, you Wumbo, he, she, me Wumbo?" Walutena answered. "Oh, forget about it! We're just wasting this chapter talking about nothing! Besides, you still need to round up my army and have them get the WAA Weirdos Emissary!"

"Fine, Miss Whiny Pants!" Watharja groaned as it walked out the door, slamming it.

"Hey, I'm not a woman!" the ugly clone shouted. "I think... I really should go outside where the light is better and find out."

"Once again, random reference is random," Waluigi groaned as he poked his head through the head of the only window of the room.

"What are you doing here?! Did you even bother to read the script?!" Walutena shouted at the lanky original.

"No! Who has time to do that?!" Waluigi argued.

"Why do I feel like this is a reference to GengarFan3's past?" the clone sighed. It shook its head, realizing that it was not relevant. "Just get out of here!"

**XxXx**

"When's Waluigi coming back?" Snake whinned as the rest of the WWE were standing in front of Walutena's smelly fortress.

"Whenever he feels like it, so shut up!" Wario ordered.

"Which is right now," Waluigi himself said as he wandered over to the group.

"So, what did you find out?" Metal Sonic asked.

"Well, other than the fact that even he or she is unaware of her gender, and the fact that Tom the Fish and Doc Louis are wrestling live soon, nothing really," the lanky plumber responded.

"Tom is so going to win, we all know that," Duck Hunt said.

"With the power of the Wumbo Combo, we all know he's going to win," Mermaid Man added.

"Can we please pay attention to what's more important here?!" Wario commanded, pointing to the fortress.

"Is Wario actually being intelligent for once?" Weegee insulted as the group walked towards the front door.


	7. Ch 7: Walutena's Foul Fortress

**Chapter 7: Walutena's Foul Fortress**

"She will arise from the dead! She will arise from the dead!"

"Is that the overly annoying conspiracy theorist hobo again?" Vector asked Charmy, who was starring out the window of the Pizza Hut.

"Yep!" the bee responded, keeping his eyes glued to the homeless Goomba outside. "He's been spazzing about some woman that's going to come back to life. Oh, and something about Planktopolis being reborn or something."

"I might actually buy the whole Planktopolis bit," Gengar said as he and Espio wandered towards their coworkers.

"Why would you buy into something ridiculous sounding like that?" Vector wondered.

"Just take a look around you!" the Pokémon replied, turning the crocodile's body around, revealing that most of the customers, ranging from Shy Guys to Waddle Dees and everything else in between, were all wearing bucket helmets with the word "Marc" labeled on the front.

"Where is everyone getting these helmets?!" Vector growled.

"According to my knowledge, they all seem to be getting them from this place called "Marc's Pizza Stand" in the Seaside Hill Zone," Espio stated.

"You mean the same Marc that terrorized the town just a few hours ago?" Charmy wondered while he finally took his gaze to his coworkers.

"Many claim he is, but some sense that he has a much more violent and evil personality to him," Gengar added. "I have some sort of feeling that he is not the same Marc."

"It doesn't effing matter!" the croc roared in absolute anger. "This guy is not only trying to enslave the entire city, but he wants to throw my business into bankruptcy by building an unoriginal stand?! I'm not going to stand for this! I'm going to show that Marc what for!"

"You can't! The stand is closed today, and no one knows where Marc lives!" Gengar said. "You'll have to wait until tomorrow."

"Fine! But tomorrow, I'm going to kick Marc's sorry ass!"

**XxXx**

"Wow, this reminds me about that one time when we invaded Weegee's Castle!" Wario said as the WWE admired the entry of Walutena's Fortress.

"Yep. No guards, no booby traps, nothing," Duck Hunt Dog agreed.

"Lol, boobies," Snake snickered, acting like the immature perv as usual.

"Can we please focus on killing Walutena already?" Metal Sonic impatiently asked, crossing his arms.

"Look at this, Metal Sonic! I found the Egg Mobile!" Dr. Eggman cheered, now sitting inside the aerial vehicle... which got from god knows where.

"Everyone, shut up!" Weegee demanded. "Metal Sonic's right, we need to find Walutena!"

"Alright, Mr. Crabby!" Snake grunted before the group made their way to the next room. Snake and Malleo slowly opened up the large, double doors that blocked their way, revealing a very dangerous sight.

"Weedle!" Wario gasped, taking in the sight of the massive army of Pokémon, who were entirely oblivious to the WWE.

"So what?" Weegee scoffed. "Just a bunch of wimpy Pokémon. I can just kill them all."

"You can't kill a Pokémon!" Waluigi warned. "They will only faint! Have you even heard of the story "The Pidgey Who Cried Gyrados"?"

"Please, that's just a shitty fairy tale," Weegee argued, turning his head away from the rest of the group.

"Regardless, there's also the fact that there is a hoard of Kakuna hanging above us," Eggman warned, pointing towards the Kakuna tribe hanging above them. "And everyone knows that if you mess around while near a Kakuna pack, you are as good as dead."

"Well shit, I can't argue with that," the Luigi clone admitted in defeat, turning back to the group. "But what the hell are we supposed to do?"

"Simple," Snake answered as he pulled out a very illegal plant out of his left pocket.

"Snake! What the hell are you doing with weed in your pocket?!" Malleo screamed.

"Calm your tits, Eager McBeaver," the soldier said. "We law enforcement guys carry this to distract Weedle. It is their biggest weakness, after all."

"Are you sure about that?" Wario asked as his suspicion grew.

"As sure as I am that Weegee has a one inch dick," Snake stated as he threw the weed towards the hoard of Weedle.

"Fuck you, Snake!" Weegee cursed as the weed landed in the middle of the army of Weedle. The Weedle stared at the drug for a few seconds, before staring at the WWE.

"Well, that didn't work," Duck Hunt groaned, covering his eyes with his paws.

"It got that gangster one," Malleo argued.

"Hell yeah, this is the shit!" the gangster Weedle shouted as he squirmed his way to the weed.

"Oh gee, that totally helps!" Weegee sarcastically replied.

"Attack!" one of the Weedle ordered. The army of Pokémon charged for the WAA Weirdos Emissary, ready to stab them to death with their head needles.

"Everyone, jump!" Wario commanded. The yellow pest crawled into the second seat of Eggman's Egg Mobile as the machine began to take off. Tails grabbed Metal Sonic's hands, while Mermaid Man grabbed Metal's feet, before the fox used his tails to fly. Snake did a similar technique, with Weegee hanging onto the soldier's feet, while Malleo hung onto his younger brother's, and Snake used his Cypher instead of twin tails. A purple duck flew over to Duck Hunt Dog and grabbed him by the tail and took off, but not before Waluigi grabbed onto dog's front paws.

"Dang it all!" one of the many Weedle roared.

"We have another group do deal with anyways, so keep charging!" another Weedle commanded, continuing his movement towards the Pink Peers, who just arrived on the scene.

"Weedle!" Amy shouted in fear.

"Quick, ru-" Toadette cried before getting stabbed in the head by one of the Pokémon. The Weedle continued to stab the Pink Peers all over.

"Yo dawgs, keep that princess slut alive!" the gangster Weedle demanded. "I want to give her a special type of Poison Sting, if you know what I mean!"

"Gross! Even Pokémon enjoy that stuff?!" Wario gagged as he leaped out of the Egg Mobile.

"Forget about that, Wario!" Snake said as the rest of the WWE landed. "We need to get moving, before those Weedle finish off those dorks!"

"Yeah, yeah, whatever," the yellow plumber grumbled as the WWE entered the next room, which was a long hallway, filled with pictures of Walutena, tacos, and Morshu.

"Well, this is boring," Waluigi muttered as he examined the hall.

"You got that right," Weegee groaned as he face palmed himself. "Seriously, how lazy is this Walutena? This is the most embarrassing excuse of a fortress I have ever seen, and I have seen Bowza's Castle!"

"You never know bro, there could be some sort of hidden trap in these halls," Malleo added as the group walked through the hall together.

"Like what?" Weegee inquired. "These paintings are actually robots that spring to life whenever some idiot spazzes about how stupid this fortress is?"

"Uh, Weegee, mah boi?" Eggman whispered. "That just happened."

"What?" the meme wondered before he realized that they were surrounded by the paintings.

"This is just great!" Metal Sonic groaned.

"Well guys, let's get dangerous and show these clowns what for!" Wario commanded as he whipped out the Dinner Blaster.

"Aww yeah, show time!" Weegee grinned as he fired an eye laser through one of the paintings.

"No, it's Waluigi time!" Waluigi screamed as he lunged for an anime drawing of Walutena. He smashed it with his trusty racket a few times, before he punctured it with his foot. Duck Hunt in the meantime, had shot down a few drawings with his Zapper, while Metal Sonic was busy slashing a 8-Bit painting of a taco with his sharp fingers.

"Get a load of this!" Eggman roared, whipping out the Egg Mobile's wrecking ball, before smashing said wrecking ball into ten robots.

"Taste the wrath of lotsa spaghetti, you Pingas-sucking fakers!" Wario taunted as he fired four plates of hot pasta at four drawings of Walutena, all hitting their targets.

"Gods, why are you doing this to us?!" a painting of Morshu cried.

"Malleo, what in Troll Face's name are you doing?!" Weegee yelled, noticing that his brother held a gun to three robotic drawings.

"Forcing them to play Sonic 06, of course!" the older brother replied. "Now, they shall know the pain I have felt!"

"Gee, he's eviler than I thought," Mermaid Man commented on the meme's actions as he threw a water ball at another enemy.

"Well, I'm proud of him," Weegee grinned as he punched a robot doodle, ripping it open.

**XxXx**

Falco and Crazy Hand were busy navigating the Space Colony Ark, trying to find a way off of it and get onto the planet below that, in order to warn the rest of the WAA Weirdos Emissary of the looming threat of Death Hand.

"Say Crazy, I got another question for you," Falco said, cracking his neck at the same time. "Do you know how this Death Hand gets formed in the first place?"

"Let me think..." Crazy muttered, stopping his movement. "I think there was something about some sort of host body, but I am not sure."

"That can only mean Master Hand must be the host, if that host part is true," Falco replied as Crazy Hand quickly caught up. "But that leaves us with another question: who is the one responsible for Death Hand's creation?"

"I dunno, but whoever it is must DIE!" Crazy spazzed, saying "DIE" in CD-I Ganon's voice. Falco sighed at the giant hand's YouTube Poop reference, when he noticed something outside, though the glass that contained the air in the giant station.

"Crazy, look!" the space pilot happily ordered. "My Arwing! And the Whatever! Both outside!"

"Yippee!" Crazy spazzed with joy. "A way to Earth!" The giant hand then punched his way through the glass, with his ally not from behind. The duo climbed into their respective vehicles quickly and joyfully.

"Prepare you're butt, Death Hand!" Falco smirked. "Cause the WAA Weirdos Emissary is going to shove a foot of justice straight up there!"

"That's... a rather disturbing thought," Crazy Hand sighed as he started up the Whatever.

**XxXx**

Master Hand and Lucario, as well as the Master Hand from the WWE universe, who decided to travel to the HTK universe not long after his Lucario left, were inside Master Hand's office, discussing about the current issues at hand.

"Gods be damned... shit has really gone down," Master Hand cursed, curling his fingers up into a fist. "And this is just the beginning."

"Pardon me, but didn't you say that the Lucario from your universe is somewhere here as well?" Lucario asked the other Master Hand.

"Yes," the other giant hand confirmed. "He left for this universe after the WAA Weirdos Emissary did, attempting to find them."

"Have you communicated with your Lucario since he left?" Master Hand questioned his counterpart.

"Indeed I have. Over a special communication device I have given him, he claimed that he was somewhere in the Emerald Hill Zone. That conversation took place just before I decided to come here."

"That would be quite a ways south of here, about a ten days walk to there and back," Master Hand replied. "As tiring as that would be, we certainly need his help with this situation. And I really need a big vacation from the chaos here anyways, so I really want to go for that walk."

"But what about Station Square? We can't leave it with all those clubs running around!" Lucario argued. "It probably would be destroyed even in one day if we weren't here to protect it!"

"Lucario, I'm going to have to ask you to guard the city while I and... I are gone," Master Hand said as he floated over to his WWE counterpart. "You are right, and someone must keep this city safe."

"Well, I suppose that could work." the Aura Pokémon said.

"Good," the WWE Master Hand said. "I suppose we should be leaving as soon as possible then."

**XxXx**

"Man, this place has been crawling with traps!" Wario groaned as the WAA Weirdos Emissary made their way through a dark, dank hallway.

"You said it!" Mermaid Man sighed. "Those Stunky sure do know how to make a big stink!"

"I still think that the phantom room was scary as hell," Malleo whimpered as he leaped onto Weegee's back.

"Get off me, you two year old!" Weegee ordered. His older brother did not comply, shaking his head as he stayed on the Luigi impostor's back.

"I just hope this doesn't last much longer," Tails whined.

"Oh, but it will," Waluigi said. "We still have quite a bit of this chapter left." Everyone but the Wario Bros. groaned at this, already fed up with this mission.

**XxXx**

Chrom and his army of pathetic misfits were wandering through the Seaside Hill Zone, searching for Walutena's fortress.

"I'm getting so wet from all the hot ladies here!" Sully the lesbian squeaked as she tried to contain her sexual excitement.

"LESBAN!" a voice screamed, causing an echo to spread throughout the Seaside Hill.

"Was that a reference to some really bad fanfiction?" Chrom gulped as he looked for the source of the voice.

"I hope not, because that could only mean we may or may not have crossed over with... that atrocity," Frederick whinned.

"And that's no good!" Sonic Robo added, dashing away as soon as he was finished with his sentence. Everyone stared at the ground where the fake hedgehog was standing for a few seconds until Donnel made another Sonic reference.

"Looks like he was snooPING AS usual, I see!" Everyone except for the very sexy Cordelia laughed at the joke.

"Ugg..." the attractive young woman sighed while she planted her left hand firmly on her face. "I swear, I might need to put Donnel's damn head into a grave if he stays so ignorant!" She thought to herself, before she realized that the rest of the worthless misfits were moving onward.

"Thank Arceus above that those dweebs are gone," Morshu said as he was preparing himself for the lunch rush of the day. Fat Pikachu and Gay Piplup helped him, pushing barrels of ice cream towards the stand.

"Phew!" Fat Pikachu gasped as he leaned on the last barrel he moved. "I might have actually lost a few pounds from doing that!"

"Shit, here they come," Morshu muttered as a somewhat large line sprawled in front of the stand. In the front of said line was none other than Anal. Since Anal was a clone of Lana, Morshu grew annoyed very quickly, but kept all of his anger in.

"One mint flavored ice cream cone!" Anal said, passing five rupees across the stand.

"O-of course, Miss...?"

"Anal. Miss Anal."

"Did anybody else just hear Anal just now?" Gay Piplup commented, nearly hurling at the name.

"Oh boy, anal!" the ever sex-craving Skitty squealed from the back of his girlfriend, Wailord. "Say honey, how about we have some sweet anal once we get home?"

"WWWAAAAIIILLLL!" Wailord gleefully screamed as she flailed her fins around like a complete idiot.

"What the hell?" Morshu grumbled.

"Pokémon logic, gotta love it!" Fat Pikachu said before he began to sip from his cherry wine, while Gay Piplup slid his butt across the sand for no decent reason, instead of looking at his phone's wallpaper of Chrom.

**XxXx**

"Man, I really hope that this is the end of this mess and we can finally just kick that fucker's ass!" Snake groaned. Everyone of the WWE, sans Wario, Waluigi, Weegee, and Mermaid Man, were all lying on the floor of the stone castle, wiped out from the chaos they had to go through.

"Thankfully, it is," Weegee sighed. "Judging by this giant sigh that clearly says, "Welcome to Walutena's Sexy Throne Room of Farts"."

"Geez, does this guy or girl or whatever really need a giant sign like that?" Duck Hunt Dog wondered while he got up.

"Considering some of its minions, yes," Weegee smriked. He pointed to a Goomba with a Waluigi face on it, who kept walking into the hard wall for no reason.

"Bah, who cares?!" Tails responded. The rest of the WWE were now up and ready to duel with the disgusting clone. "Let's show Walutena what for!"

"Okey dokie!" Wario agreed while he grabbed the doorknob to the throne room. "Prepare yourselves for one of the greatest battles of your lives!" The WWE put on brave faces as they barged into the room, only for said faces to turn horrified, as they were sent flying out of the room, castle, and seaside from an awful smelling fart blast.

"Wow, that smells horrid!" Walutena gagged on its own gas. "Guess that's what happens when you hold it in for too long!"

"You know what Shrek says," Watharja commented, taking a clothing pin off of its nose. "Better out than in!"

"You got that right!" the other ugly clone replied as the gas left the room. "Now, it's time that I went back to my ultimate, evil plan... the plan to eliminate all fish sticks in the world!"

"Yes, some action!" Watharja cheered. "Eh- wait, why just that fish sticks? Why not every single last food out there?"

"That's coming after I get rid of those disgusting fish sticks. And that will happen right after I watch the wrestling match between Tom and Doc!" the ugly "goddess" finished.

"Oh, for the love of all that is insane..."

**XxXx**

The WAA Weirdos Emissary were still flying over the ground, but there were rapidly approaching the Pizza Hut. Wario covered his eyes while the rest of the WWE began to scream. Ironically enough, the emissary landed on a giant pile of pillows that were lying right in the middle of the Pizza Hut's parking lot.

"Wait, we actually survived that?" Wario grunted as he got onto his feet.

Metal Sonic crawled out from beneath Snake, before saying "Somehow, yes." Soon, all members of the emissary were on their feet. "And I can't believe we really wasted our time going through that place only to get sent flying back out!"

"How the hell are we going to kill that bitch, though?" Weegee questioned.

"Don't fret, young heroes," Mermaid Man assured. "I have a secret weapon that we can use against Walutena."

"Is it the Aqua Glove?! Or the Tickle Belt?!" Waluigi excitedly asked.

"I'll show you," the super hero said as the group went inside the Pizza Hut.

**XxXx**

Inside the ruins of the Capri-Sun Factory, the evil and perverted meme character, Dolan Duk, was looking out a shattered window, with his frenemies, Gooby and Spoderman, standing right behind him.

"Soon," Dolan said in his raspy voice. "Soon, the Dolan United Krew, shall take over this whole city." He turned to his allies, who had looks of pure evil in their eyes... well, Spoderman did. Gooby just had his same old derpy look. "First, we must kill the leaders of all the major clubs. Dark Pit, Palutena, Shulk, and Shrek... but I think our little friend will take care of those idiots."


	8. Ch 8: The Justice League

**Chapter 8: The Justice League**

The WAA Weirdos Emissary were inside their Pizza Hut hideout, with Mermaid Man standing in front of a door no one else ever bothered to enter.

"So, what is this stupid secret weapon, Mermaid Man?" Weegee asked, getting impatient.

"Just one of the many remain 60's super hero garments left in the world!" the fat hero replied as he swung open the door, revealing somethings that the Wario Bros. squealed in joy at just seeing them in real life.

"THE ORGINAL INTERNATIONAL JUSTICE LEAGUE OF SUPER AQUATINTANCES OUTFITS!" The dumb duo screamed.

"As seen in episode 52b of SpongeBob!" a random voice shouted.

"Can we please shorten that name, good lord," Weegee groaned. "Because I'm not going to say a ridiculous name like that over and over."

"Fine, we'll call it the Justice League. Happy?" Tails replied.

"It doesn't matter what we call it, as long as four of you wear these costumes," Mermaid Man said, handing Wario, Waluigi, Weegee, and Dr. Eggman each a costume.

"Cool!" Wario squealed, holding up his new costume. "Isn't this sweet, Waluigi?!"

"Fanboys," Snake muttered while he planted his right hand on his face.

"Just remember boys," Mermaid Man warned. "With great power comes big responsibility."

"Did somebody say big?!" Ridley shouted, trying to squirm his way into the entrance of the Pizza Hut Hideout.

"Get out of here Ridley!" the WWE commanded. "You're too big!" The giant purple dragon nearly immediately began to cry, before running away from the scene. Sakurai, who was watching the whole incident from a hidden camera he hid inside the hideout, laughed at poor Ridley's misery.

**XxXx**

The WWE were sitting in a small movie theater, hidden within the Pizza Hut Hideout. A movie began to play, as Malleo began to chew on his popcorn.

"Introducing the new Justic League!" a voice shouted as said words appeared on the screen.

"We paid nine dollars for this?!" Tails growled, crumpling up the bag of popcorn he had in his left hand.

"I paid Over 9000!" Vegeta, who had mysteriously appeared next to the young fox, screamed.

"Meet the Quickster, the fastest freak alive!" the voice said as Wario, now in his costume, appeared on the screen, running away from Sanic Hegehog while said meme's theme began to play.

"Come on, step it up!" Malleo referenced. "This movie is too low quality for me!"

"Captain Magma, who's overflowing with anger!" the voice continued as Eggman in his outfit appeared on the screen.

"Red Mountain Zone!" Dr. Eggman yelled before his whole body suddenly caught on fire. This caused the mad scientist to scream and roll around the floor.

"Miss Appear!" the voice said as Weegee was shown in the footage.

"Why the hell am I the woman?!" the meme asked in rage and humiliation. Everyone in the audience laughed at this.

"And finally, the Elastic Waistband!" the voice said while Dhalsim and Lanky Kong were shown playing Patty Cake, instead of Waluigi.

"What am I watching?" Duck Hunt sighed, shaking his head in the process.

"This four idiots shall stop the evil Walutena and save the world!" the voice finished, the screen into darkness. Mermaid Man and the Justice League stood in between the audience and the screen.

"Now, young heroes," Mermaid Man began. He quickly cleared his throat before continuing. "While these four may have powers that will enable us to end the reign of Walutena, they still are in of training before we can attempt our assault. We shall train until sundown tomorrow, when we will fight that EEEVIILLL tyrant!"

"I thought you stopped shouting evil like that," Eggman said to the elderly hero as everyone else left the room.

"Eh, it's an on and off thing," Mermaid Man replied.

**XxXx**

"My, this countryside sure does look lovely!" WWE Master Hand commented on the wild range that spanned across Station Square's southern border.

"Indeed it is," his counterpart, the CTH Master Hand agreed. "It's a tragedy however, that this could all turn to a burning wasteland if we don't do something."

"Are you sure we can stand up to it?" WWE Master Hand asked. "I mean, these clubs are just going to keep running around, causing chaos, while a legitimate threat keeps looming over us all!"

"Of course," CTH Master Hand replied. "We just need to gather as many people like us, and we should develop an army powerful enough to bring down the Master Core."

"Considering this world is just as insane, if not than more, than my world, that will be near impossible to do," WWE Master Hand groaned as the popular resort, the Grape Gardens, came into view ahead.

**XxXx**

*Kirby and the Rainbow Curse's version of Heavy Lobster's Theme begins to play*

Wario was running up a large stack of question mark blocks at a tremendous speed. Sweat quickly fell down from his face, flying down towards the ground once it reached his neck area. Wario eventually slowed down, to tired from running, and falls down towards the Earth. Sadly for Weegee, he got crushed by the ignorant plumber, breaking his fall.

**XxXx**

Dr. Eggman stood still, looking at a target floating in the air a small ways away from him. He bent over, ready to launch a fireball from the tiny volcano that was on his head. He fired, but the fireball missed its target, instead hitting an oil tank, causing a massive fire. Eggman ran as fast as he could while firemen arrived to extinguish the flames.

**XxXx**

Waluigi was standing perfectly still, eyes closed. A light came on in front of him, and his eyes opened in a flash. He started moving his legs in an incredible and fast movement. The source of light was coming from a large, flat screen TV, which revealked that Waluigi was playing Dance Dance Revolution: Hot Topic Krew Edition. However, he was getting all of the wrong steps. Metal Sonic, who stood a few feet away, facepalmed as he wondered how this was useful training.

**XxXx**

Weegee quickly turned invisible and began tip toeing his way across a stick covered hallway. He was doing quite well, until he cracked a stick. An alarm went off as the floor beneath him turned into a giant stairwell. Poor Weegee was tripped down the trap, screaming in pain. In another room, a certain purple robot, was laughing at the poor meme's misery as the whole scene was on a massive TV.

**XxXx**

Wario was running on a treadmill, going about 250 MPH as he kept going. He took a quick drink of the water that was held in his right hand. However, he accidently spilt some on the conveyor belt of the treadmill, which he quickly tripped on, sending him flying all over the gym he was in. Waluigi, Duck Hunt, and Tails quickly ran out the door as Wario continued to fly uncontrollably.

**XxXx**

Eggman once again stood in front of the target, his back facing the sunset. He bent down before he tried to fire another fireball, but he instead farted. Eggman groaned at this when an actual fireball did come out of the volcano and hit the target. However, Eggman did not notice the fireball nor the target, so he angrily walked away, muttering something as he went.

**XxXx**

Waluigi began to play Dance Dance Revolution again, actually succeeding this time around. He was getting such a high record, he was rivaling THE world record. Sadly, his efforts were cut short when the power went out. Waluigi stared at the now pitch black screen for a few seconds, before he was surrounded by blue flames. He lunged for the TV, screaming and smashing the television with his bare fists.

**XxXx**

Weegee was sneaking behind a stuffed doll of Dark Pit, slowly tip toeing. He had a knife in his right hand, and was supposed to stab the doll in the neck without catching it's attention. He nearly made it to the doll, until Tails ran in, screaming about Wario flying all around the gym. This caught the doll's attention, which turned around an began firing bullets from its mouth. Weegee and Tails ran as fast as they could, avoiding the bullets in the process.

**XxXx  
**

*Heavy Lobster's Theme stops as Kibou no Uta starts playing instead*

Wario was running up the question mark blocks once again, going double the speed he was going before. This time, not a single drop of sweat fell from his face. He kept on going past the spot he fell from before, before he reached the peak of the blocks. He stood on top of the peak, looking at the rising sun that stood in the east.

**XxXx**

Eggman stood in front of the target for the last time, as the sun rose behind said target. The mad scientist bent down again and launched another fireball, which hit he target. Eggman quickly stood straight and began dancing in place. Meanwhile, the fireball kept flying through the world, eventually crashing right into Liligant's Lemonade Stand inside the Seaside Hill Zone.

**XxXx**

Waluigi was dancing on his game once again, nearing the world record once again. This time, he actually managed to break it, which caused him to scream in happiness, as paparazzi rushed into the room and took pictures of the lanky plumber.

**XxXx**

Weegee was once again tip toeing through the hallway of sticks. He eventually began to stop tip toeing and started running through the hall, safely dodging the sticks with ease. He kept running, as the purple robot began to cry at Weegee's success.

**XxXx**

*Kibou no Uta stops playing*

"Wow, young lads! I'm more than impressed!" Mermaid Man exclaimed as the WWE were gathering inside the main room of the Pizza Hut Hideout. "You managed to use master powers at a much faster rate than the original Justice League itself!"

"We did WHAT?!" Wario squealed. "WAHOOOOOOO!"

"Shut up!" Snake roared.

"So, are we going to launch our second attack on Walutena soon?" Weegee asked as he scratched his back.

"Yes," the elderly super hero answered. "We shall head for the Seaside Hill near sundown."

"That only givs us about three hours!" Tails added. "We need to grab everything we can before we go!"

"You got that right!" Wario agreed. "Everyone, grab as much useful stuff as you can! We're going to kick Walutena's butt soon!"

**XxXx**

"All right boys!" Vector shouted, getting the attention of Espio, Charmy, and Gengar. "We're going to kick this Marc moron's ass up really good!"

"Are you sure about this?" Gengar worringly questioned. "I mean, have you seen the SpongeBob movie? This is only going to bring the apocalypse on early!"

"We gotta do something though!" Vector argued, clenching his right hand into a fist. "If things get bad, we can trust the WAA Weirdoes Emissary to stop it!"

"Alright, but don't say I didn't warn you," the ghost Pokémon sighed as the coworkers exited the Pizza Hut. Gengar took a look at the sky as he was walking, wondering if this was the last time he would see blue skies ever again. He shook his head and looked at the ground, trying to believe that the WWE would handle things.

**XxXx**

"Hey Morshu, what are you doing?" Fat Pikachu asked his friend, who was gathering his belongings.

"I'm moving some of my things to a secret stand I set up in the far northern section of this Zone," Morshu replied as he lifted a large sack of his stuff over his head. "Up in the jungles. Major shit is about to go down here."

"Oh geez..." Fat Pikachu gulped, beginning to panic. "Can I help you get some things?"

"Sure," his friend said. 'We won't be able to get all of my junk in one trip though, so we'll have to come back. oh, and make sure you tell Gay Piplup and Mewtwo about this."

"Gotcha," Fat Pikachu grunted while he lifted a stone statue of King Harkinian over his yellow head.

**XxXx**

The WWE was moving through the streets of southern Station Square, looking around the city. Wario and Waluigi grew concerned faces, which caused Tails to question what was bothering the normally happy, ignorant duo.

"What's up, you guys?" Tails asked. "Why the long faces?"

"Look around you!" Wario replied. He pointed to many different creatures with the bucket helmets on their heads.

"What's the big deal? It's just a bunch of people with bad tastes," Weegee said as the group passed the Smash Mansion.

"I think I have seen this before, but I can't remember where..." Mermaid Man muttered.

"The old hag is right," Snake added. "This does seem awfully familiar."

"Well, whatever it is, we don't have the time to dwell on it," Duck Hunt Dog butted in. "We have an evil, hideous clone to exterminate first."

"You're right," Waluigi said, though he was still highly concerned over the fate of Station Square. "Walutena comes first. We can deal with these helmets afterwards."

**XxXx**

Tiny Kong was busily skipping along through the dark alleyways of Station Square, not concerned about what could be lurking through the place.

"Tralalalala..." the monkey girl chirped, unaware of the trio of villains right behind her.

"So, this is that Tiny Kong kid, right?" Spoderman asked his allies, Gooby and Bogs Binny, the newest member of the Dolan United Krew.

"Sure is, Spoderman," Bogs answered, crossing him arms. "What I would like to know is though, is why we have to attack this overly sexualized ape to begin with. Weren't we supposed to kill the leaders instead of their miserable minions?"

"We're not supposed to kill her, just beat her down," Gooby commented. "It's so we can make sure that the major clubs are aware of our presence."

"So, has Dolan given us the signal yet?" Bogs wondered. Gooby stared at the roof of the nearest building, finding Dolan on there. He gave the group a thumbs down.

"Move," Gooby ordered. The trio began to follow Tiny through the alleys, making sure not to lose her. They pursed her for a few minutes, until Tiny eventually got the feeling that she was being followed.

"W-who's there?" Tiny stuttered while she turned her head around, with Sonic CD's final boss theme playing. The DUK trio were already behind a garbage bin, as the monkey girl shrugged. When she turned around however, she was in for a big surprise.

"Hello, little, helpless girl," Dolan whispered, holding a switchblade in his hand. His eyes were mutating into a dark red color as the other DUK members crawled out from their hiding spots, now with whips in their hands. Tiny looked around for a place to escape, but there was none.

All Tiny could do was get beaten to near death.

**XxXx**

"WAAHHHHH!" a voice shouted in space. A lone spaceship was flying towards Earth itself and was entirely out of control. "MAYDAY!"

"Axel, you dumbass! Look what you've done!" another voice yelled.

"Zero divided by Zero is... IMPOSSIBLE!" yet another voice screamed.

"Vile, shut up!" the second voice commanded. "Now we're being dragged into some random fanfiction, solely to be a stupid inside joke!"

"Actually, a future ins-" the first voice was interrupted by the ship crashing into the moon, slicing it in half.

"Hey Falco, do you hear that?" Crazy asked his fine feathered friend. The duo were flying past the now broken moon, not noticing what just happened.

"Hear what?" Falco said. "Unless you hear that weird expanding sound too..."

"What, wait?" Crazy questioned until he noticed what was right in front of the two ships. It was none other than a giant Donkey Kong with a highly perverted look on his face, and a massive censor bar coming from his waist area.

"This is a feature length fanfiction," the giant DK said before he swung the censor bar at the two heroes, who barely dodged the attack.

"His Expand Dong is attacking! Quick, do a barrel roll!" Falco commanded, doing an actual barrel roll while Crazy did an Aileron roll. But since an Aileron roll is a barrel roll as far as Star Fox games seem to care, it might as well be considered a barrel roll.

**XxXx**

"Well, there it is," Waluigi groaned as the group stood on a cliff that overlooked the dark fortress that is Walutena's. The group sighed, having bad memories of that place, and already expecting it to be way worse.

"Why do we have to go through that hellhole again?" Weegee sighed, acting like his typical, whiny self.

"Well, do you want that ugly clone to get away with whatever he or she is planning?" Wario argued.

"Let's just get this over with," Metal Sonic threw in. "It will be quick and painless if we do."

"Says the personality lacking robot!" Malleo roared, punching the robot in the gut. Metal was sent skidding for a bit, before he regained his balance.

"What was that for?!" Metal Sonic angrily asked.

"Expect shit like that from him," Weegee answered. "He's an awkward ass like that."

"Why, thank you!" Malleo responded. The group stared at the younger meme for a few seconds, until they hear Chrom's voice.

"My fishstick senses are tingling! And when that happens, that's no good!" the prince shouted, unsheathing his sword.

"Did he just say "my fishsticks senses are tingling" or "my fish dicks are tinkling"?" Snake whispered to Duck Hunt Dog.

"I will find out what will happen to my fishsticks, and will keep them safe from harm!" Chrom continued while he leaped over the WWE and ran straight towards Walutena's fort.

"Well, that was... stupid, to say the very least," Weegee said. "Shall we get going?"

"Sure thing," Wario agreed, the group climbing down the cliff. Right next to said cliff however, a certain funky monkey by the name of Funky Kong was walked by with a somewhat sad look on his face.

"I don't know why I'm here, but I feel like I am going to become a part of some crazy club soon," the ape sighed, pulling out his sexy saxophone. "I just wish I could head back to my own dimension..."


	9. Ch 9: Reinvading The Fortress

**Chapter 9: Reinvading The Fortress**

"And once again, no traps whatsoever inside the main lobby," Wario sighed. The WAA Weirdos Emissary stood in front of the door that lead to the room previously filled with Weedle and Kakuna.

"Hell, I have a very bad feeling about this," Weegee groaned. He knew something had changed about this foul fortress. Nothing looked different, but he could certainly tell that bigger danger lurked through this hellhole. Dangers from worse than the ones from their last adventure here.

"What kind of bad feeling?" Snake asked, who was itching to open the door.

"I can't really explain, as my memory of it is very foggy," the meme said, stiffly folding his stiff arms. "All I can really remember is that I got this feeling playing some ROM hacks a few weeks ago..."

"Whatever, loser," Wario butted in. "Let's just get this dumb mission finally over with!" Weegee sighed at Wario's eagerness as Waluigi swung the door open, revealing some of the most horrifying traps you could ever see in your life.

"Chain Chomps!" Tails screamed, pointing at the herd of black-colored creatures that cluttered the now much larger room.

"Flamethrowers!" Malleo added.

"Black Muncher Plants!" Waluigi yelled.

"GengarFan3 and Yoshizilla!" Mermaid Man shouted.

"Why in the hell are we in this dump?" GengarFan3 wondered as he took a sip of AoStH Robotnik's tea.

"Shouldn't you know, since you typed this up?" Yoshizilla countered. "Unless... Morshu has started to type up this fanfic as well now."

"Gods damn it all..." GF3 mummered. "As if one fanfic wasn't enough..."

"Now what are we gonna do?!" Duck Hunt Dog panicked. Wario thought about it for a few moments before a light bulb popped out of his left ear.

"I got it! I got a plan!" Wario said, getting everyone's attention.

"Well, that's a first," Weegee commented.

"Although, I must warn you guys... I may not survive this plan," the fat plumber continued while he ignored Weegee's comment.

"What?!" Waluigi whined. "Wario, you can't! We need you!"

"I'm sorry, old pal, but I must do this." Wario walked towards the edge of the platform that divided the room, which blocked the non-chained Chain Chomps from escaping. "If I don't make it out of this alive, please defeat Walutena for me... and the pathetic clubs out there... and record all of the first three seasons of SpongeBob, so I can watch them in heaven... and-"

"Just get onto your dumb plan!" Dr. Eggman interrupted.

"Fine, geez!" Wario obeyed. He snapped his fingers, causing Malleo to pull out his stereo.

"Gotta go fast?" Malleo asked, ready to turn his stereo on.

"Gotta go fast," Wario repeated. Malleo played Sonic X's opening theme, Gotta Go Faster, on his stereo while Wario, using his newfound powers, began powering up a Spin Dash. After five seconds, he unleashed the attack, rolling around at the speed of all while leaving a trail of flames in his wake. The rest of the WWE could only watch in awe as Wario rolled into the soon-to-be incinerated muncher plants, smashed through a small portion of the herd of Chain Chomps, and burst open the many flamethrowers that scattered the room.

Waluigi shook his head, realizing that the rest of the emissary could help now that most of the traps had been eliminated. "Come on!" The other members charged ahead, helping destroy the remaining Chain Chomps. Metal Sonic and Tails helped distract a single Chain Chomp before Dr. Eggman blew it to bits with his new volcanic powers, while Snake and Duck Hunt Dog were busy shooting a trio of Chomps with their guns. Waluigi and Mermaid Man kept tossing a barrage of bombs and water balls at a small portion of the herd as Weegee and Malleo fired eyes lasers at the remaining Chomps. Once the Chomp were eliminated, the group gathered around the door to the next room as Yoshizilla and GengarFan3 stood frozen due to the events that just happened.

"Well, that went much faster than expected," Duck Hunt said with a grin on his puppy face.

"Yipee, let's just get this shit over with," Weegee whined.

"I'm with the Geester on this one," Snake added. "We need to get out of this hellhole and fast."

"I would love to, but this door is stuck!" Malleo cringed while he tried to yank open the large double door that stood before them. Weegee sighed before he fired a eye laser blast from his eyes, which incinerated a massive portion of the door. Waluigi peered his head into the gapping hole before gasping loudly.

"What is it? Something dangerous up ahead?" Tails wondered.

"Possibly... It's clones of some of us!" Waluigi replied. The rest of the emissary peered though the hole to discover a group consisting of Wario, Waluigi, Lucario, Falco, King Harkinian, Weegee, Malleo, Dr. Wily, Bowza, the Weegee version of Bowser, and Tewd, the Weegee version of Toad, approaching them.

"Hey there, alternate universe versions of us!" the mystery Wario waved.

"Are you from this universe, then?" Weegee asked.

"No, we're from another one, based off of your universe," Dr. Wily answered. "In our universe, you guys have never found out about the Hot Topic Krew until the war between them and the rest of the dorky clubs around here was done and over with."

"Then why are you here?" Waluigi pondered, getting suspicious of this new group.

"We are crossing other alternative universes, in search of a wicked villain, the rest of the remaining Smashers, and a special virus," Lucario said. "We accidentally wondered into this universe on our way to another one, supposedly set in a zombie apocalypse."

"Just one more question: what exactly is this wicked villain?" Wario asked, intrigued by this story.

"It's kinda hard to explain, but simply put he is Metal Luigi from yet another alternate universe," the mystery Wario stated. "And since I'm extremely stupid, even I haven't exactly got my head around him and his abilities yet."

"Well, we can confirm that this alternate universe of yours sucks just as badly as ours then," Weegee said while he shook his head.

"You said it, brother," the other Weegee agreed. The wall to the left began to shake, causing the WWE and these "clones" to stop their conversation and pay attention to said wall, which quickly crumbled. Behind the rubble stood the supposedly dead Pink Peers Toadette, who had a silver look in her eyes.

"Fuck, an infected!" Bowza screamed. "Metal Luigi must be here too!"

"An infected? What do you mean?" Snake gagged as the "clones" approached the "infected" Toadette.

"There's not enough time to explain!" Harkinian cried out. "Just remember: if you ever encounter anyone with that sort of silver gaze in their eyes, battle carefully, or else you will become infected too!"

"Also, never fight them alone!" the other Malleo added while Lucario and Toadette traded blows with each other. "You're basically committing suicide if you pull a stunt like that!" Lucario managed to send the infected mushroom girl out of the fort with a fully charged Aura Sphere, which caused the clones to rush out after her. The WAA Weirdos Emissary stood in awe at the events that had just occurred, before they came to their senses.

"Well, luckily there is only a .5 percent chance that we will ever encounter them or any of these infected creatures ever again in this world," Eggman sighed.

"Good, because that may have contained to many spoilers already," Wario replied. "Not only for this fic, but for that other one that doesn't even exist yet as well."

"As much as I would like to continue blabbering about this topic, we have far more important things to be focusing on!" Tails said in panic. He pointed above them, where a near exact look-a-like of Big Arms, the final boss of Sonic 3 loomed over them. The only real difference was that its spikes on the top of the head looked like Super Sayian hair, being longer and yellow.

"What?! That Walutena now thinks that she can steal my creations?!" Eggman roared. His hatred for Walutena was growing tremendously, and he was ready to burst, in case his cherry red face couldn't deliver that message. "He or she or it or whatever will pay for this!"

"Well, this looks like this is going to take a while," Wario commented as Mermaid Man and Eggman began firing barrages of water and fireballs at the giant, floating mech. "Why don't you kiddies go and see what the Hot Topic Krew and all those other dorks are up to while we beat the living Dankey Kang out of this hunk of junk!"

"Oook! Let me out!" Dankey Kang, the blue colored Donkey Kong clone, cried from inside the machine while chewing on his rings.

**XxXx**

"Gods damn it!" Shadow yelled. "Not more rumors!"

"Rumors of what?" Lucina wondered.

"Oh, only about how I have supposedly left you guys to become "neutral" or some shit. I'm willing to bet it was that Silver dumbass you started this crap. That pot head will pay for this..."

"Does he actually smoke weed or no?" Lucas asked while he entered the room.

"Probably, being the wasteful piece of shit he is," Shadow muttered, clenching his fists. "Seriously, he's an absolute nobody that no one likes. Even that fatass Big is more beloved than that dick. Why the hell must SEGA insist on bringing him back?!"

"Are we going to keep acting like babies or actually do something about it then?" Greninja commented.

"He's right," Lucina agreed. "Let's go and kick his ass if you're really that salty about it."

"I don't think we need to," Luigi, who was watching the local news, said. "Come check this out!" The rest of the krew in the room surrounded the TV, only to find something very surprising.

"As previously mentioned just five minutes ago, Silver the Hedgehog was been found near death inside the former hideout of Team Magma," the news reporter on TV said. "Team Magma has turned "good" recently and reportedly moved out to Rustboro City, so few people believe that there were responsible. However, it does seem to be an attempted murder, as there was a note of some kind left of his body. Sadly, most of the ink was washed away, rendering it useless as to find out who the assailant was."

"Woah..." Lucas whispered.

"The odds of the hedgehog's survival is said to be around 10%, as his wrists were cut and his stomach was stabbed," the reporter continued. "We will bring more news once Professor Birch discovers more information."

"Even... even I find this to be insane..." Shadow stuttered. "It is all just... too damn crazy."

"But just who did it?" Greninja wondered. "We know it wasn't any of us, and there are no other leads..."

"Just leave it to the police to figure that out," Luigi said. "They'll solve this case."

"I suppose you're right," Lucina shrugged.

**XxXx**

"Hmmm... interesting," Dolan said. He, as well as Gooby, were inside of their hideout, which was the Sea Mauville.

"What? Something big go down?" Gooby asked.

"Over by that Team Moron's old hideout or whatever, Silver the Derphog got beaten up real good."

"Really? So it looks like we have another force to deal with. One that's actually taking things seriously like us. We might actually have a worthy foe on our hands."

"Not for long," Dolan assured his ally. "Spoderman and Bogs have captured a whole army of glitch Pokémon from Cinnabar's western coast, and are heading back here quickly."

"I sure am glad that we got that juicy info from that old hag in Viridian," Gooby giggled. "Now we are more of a threat than ever."

"Indeed, Gooby," Dolan grinned. "Indeed."

**XxXx**

Inside the remains of the Team Magma hideout, the place was all but quiet. Nearly everything had been taken out when Magma left the place, only leaving mostly irrelevant things such as old books, as well as a prototype Mega Stone that was in development before Maxie cancelled the project, eventually realizing the dangers a project like this could cause. However, there was one thing that was not inside the base before Magma left: inside what once was Maxie's room laid a seemingly harmless stone.

Seemingly, of course. In reality, it contain multiple spirits, which formed into a creature. People have claimed to have seen stones similar to this stone, and some have claimed to even discover the creature itself, which was supposedly the embodiment of evil. Despite these claims, scientists have dismissed this as a myth and never bothered researching on this creature.

Was this creature truly evil? What was its goals? Why was it in the abandoned base? That is a tale for another day.

**XxXx**

"Get ready to land, Crazy!" Falco screamed. "We're heading straight for the Seaside Hill!"

"Really?! Yay!" Crazy squealed with joy. "Say, is that a Landmaster down on the beach?"

"Sure looks like it!" Falco said. "What do you say we do to it?"

"I dunno," the giant hand replied.

"Wait, is that Falco's Arwing in the air?" Fox, who was inside the Landmaster with Ness and the MemeMemeMeme Brigade.

"Yeah, but I'm right here! So who on Seaside Hill is driving that thing?!" the MMMB Falco wondered. As soon as he finished his sentence, the giant tank blew up, sending the CTH and MMMB flying across the beach. The Arwing and the Whatever swooped down by the blast site, both firing laser beams down on the seaside. The residents and tourists of the beach , ranging from Garfield the Cat to Morshu, to Mini Sonic to Bernice the Pigeon, began to run around in mass panic as yet another fire spread across the Seaside Hill.

"Say, do you guys hear all of that screaming?" Wario, who was standing in front of a window that showed the current episode of chaos happening in the seaside.

"I don't know what you are talking about," Tails shrugged. "Besides, why should we worry about what is happening outside when we have Walutena to finish off?"

"Because maybe that disgusting tyrant might be up to something out there?" Weegee argued. "As stupid as Wario can be, he does have some common sense... extremely infrequently maybe, but still."

"Nah, Master Walutena is too busy trying to eliminate fish sticks inside the throne room," Watharja, who randomly appeared out of thin air at that second. "So, whatever nonsense is going on outside is not involving us."

"Thanks for the help, extremely hideous moron," Waluigi said. "Now lead me to the closest room with a bathroom so I can stare at my amazingly gorgeous face!" Watharja sighed at this absurdly stupid comment.

"Excuse me, king of hypocrisy, I didn't know that you were in an even dumber mood than usual today!" the ugly fused clone insulted.

"Go suck a Pingas, you liar!" Waluigi roared before he kicked his ugly clone out of the hallway the WWE were in.

"Now that we finally got through that moment of brain cell damage, can we please move onto the next room, please?" Snake groaned, folding his arms together.

"I don't think I lost that many brain cells," Malleo, who held his brain in the palm of his left hand, commented.

"That's because you don't have many to begin with," Tails reminded the Mario clone. "Now put your brain back in your head so we can go into the throne room!" Malleo did as told, flipping open the lid of his head and tossed his brain in, before the group burst through the giant door, revealing a Chrom-shaped hole in the left wall and a large pile of ash looming over Walutena. The evil clone laughed as the whole world transformed into a very serious, anime-like art style.

"You're too late, WAA Weirdos Emissary!" Walutena cackled. "I have eliminated the Fish Stick God, thus ending the existence of fish sticks unless that wasteful god is revived!"

"How could you do such a thing?!" Wario growled. Raising his fists, he was ready to beat the living tar out of this punk for all the crimes it has committed.

"Because it is all a part of my master plan: to eliminate all food products in the world, so everyone can starve to death! Leaving me the sole life form on the planet!"

"Are you crazy?! That'll mean you won't have any food for yourself!" Metal Sonic argued.

"I won't need food soon enough," the evil clone grinned. "With just a bit more nuclear energy and the power of the Chaos Emeralds, I will be granted with the greatest thing ever possible: immortality!" Walutena laughed maniacally for a few moments before continuing. "I say we settle this, once a for all! Try to defeat me, WAA Weirdos Emissary!"

"Will the WWE manage to defeat Walutena?" an odd voice asked. "Who attempted to murder Silver? And will Vector and his crew find Evil Marc before it is too late? Tune in for the next episode!"

"And now," another odd voice said. "A special sneak peak at the next episode of WAA Weirdos Emissary!"

**XxXx**

The whole WWE, Walutena, Watharja, and Gengar were all dancing awkwardly while wearing goofy expressions on their faces.

"Wow, this sneak peak is shit," Morshu, who was sitting in a movie theater with Mewtwo and the CD-I Pokémon Bros., watching the sneak peak, scoffed.

"You got that right," Mewtwo agreed. "This is almost as bad as that fucking bitch Cia!"

"Why are we here to begin with? I could be at home masturbating right now instead!" Gay Piplup shunned while his friends stared at him awkwardly.

"OK," Fat Pikachu murmured. "I just want this chapter to end so that we don't have to put up with anymore bullshit." Just then, Bernice the Pigeon flew into the theater before her face mutated into the infamous Shoop Da Whoop face. She then shouted the Shoop Da Whoop's also infamous line as she fired multiple lasers from her mouth causing everyone in the movie theater to panic. The classic Looney Tunes theme began to play as Wario poked his head out of the screen of the projection.

"That's all, folks!" Wario quoted before he got fried by one of Bernice's lasers.


	10. Ch 10: WWE VS Walutena

**Chapter 10: WWE VS Walutena**

"Now, we shall fight!" Wario shouted at Walutena. "Prepare yourself for the end of your reign of terror!"

"Bring it on, fools!" the evil clone dared. The WWE got into battle positions as herds of Waluigi fusions marched into the room. Wario stared deeply into Walutena's eyes, who did the same. They continued to stare into each other's eyes as sweat drops fell from both of their faces. Eventually, Walutena blinked, quick enough that most people would easily miss it.

"Ha, it blinked!" Wario bragged, pointing at the loser of the staring contest.

"Oh, shut up!" Walutena whined.

"Wait, were you two actually having a staring contest?" Dr. Eggman inquired.

"I had a staring contest with a minion too," Malleo butted in. "Although, the minion went through a bit of plastic surgery on his face, if you know what I mean." He then pointed to said henchman, who now had the face of Malleo himself.

"For once, I'm actually glad my brother did something totally stupid for once," Weegee commented. "He actually managed to use the Weegee Virus correctly!"

"For the love of icing, can we please move onto the battle?!" Walutena grumbled.

"Did someone say icing?!" Meloetta squealed, breaking into the throne room.

"Get the fuck out of here, you fucked up girl with an icing fetish!" Snake ordered. The poor Normal/ Psychic Pokémon sighed before sulking away.

"That's it, that does it!" Weegee roared while flames engulfed his eyes. "I'm going to kick some ass no matter what happens now!" The crude meme proceeded to charge straight for a Waluchomp, a fusion of Waluigi and a Garchomp, before smashing the creature with his right fist. The monster flew back into the wall, before getting crushed by a giant pile of rubble.

"Time to fight EEEVVVVIIIILLLL!" Mermaid Man shouted, hurling a water ball at a Walustarman.

"Malleo, play the Pokémon Black/ White Gym Leader theme!" Wario commanded as he smashed a Wamotobug with both of his hands.

"But that one's the worst theme!" Tails argued while choking a Walucario. "Gen one's theme is the best! Gen one is best Gen!"

"Fuck you, genwunner!" Weegee cursed, before pulling out a Bob-omb from his pocket. He chucked it at the young fox, which went hurdling at the speed of sound through the air. Time itself froze, leaving the bomb stuck in midair.

"Bob-omb!" King Koopa from the crappy Mario Bros. movie randomly said before time continued smoothly. Tails tried to dodge the attack, but his attempts were in vain. He got caught in the explosion with the Walucario, screaming in pain. When the dust settled, Tails was revealed to have survived the blast, covered entirely in soot. The Waluigi fusion however, was not so lucky. It was now no more than a mere pile of burning ash.

"Alright, now hit it, Malleo!" Wario joyfully roared. Malleo, being the music guy he was, did so, letting the piece of music fill the air inside the fortress.

"No! Stop it!" Walutena screeched, firmly planting hands onto it's own ears. "That nerdy fox is right!"

"Hey, you are you calling nerdy?!" Tails angrily said. However, Walutena managed to continue it's sentence while ignoring the comment.

"Gen one is the only that Gen that is and will matter! All others suck!" With that, Walutena summoned a portal that sucked in Wario, Waluigi, Weegee, and Eggman all in, before Walutena itself flew inside the portal.

"Wario, no!" Duck Hunt Dog cried as he held back a Wawaddle Dee.

**XxXx**

"Any sign of that brat?!" Vector demanded to know. He and the rest of the coworkers were at the Seaside Hill Zone in search of Evil Marc. Despite their greatest efforts, they had failed to truly find the evil little child.

"Nothing over here!" Charmy, who was busily flying over a few cliffs, reported.

"I have nothing also!" Espio claimed as he tried to climb down one of the checkered hills.

"I don't have any..." Gengar started before his eyes caught something off into the distance. "Wait! I think I see it!"

"Really?! Where?!" his boss inquired.

"Over there, right near the edge of the jungle that lies to the north!" Gengar answered. The rest of the co-workers gathered around the purple Pokémon before their boss gave them orders.

"Alright men, let's charge right into the pest and run him out of town!"

"If we do that, he might try to pull something!" Espio warned. "It's best if we try to settle this with peace."

"Everyone knows that never ends well!" Vector retorted. "Besides, violence is fun!"

"Violence is all fun and games until someone gets a Game Over," Charmy said.

"Oh fine!" Vector muttered. "But don't come crying to me when this peace plan fails!"

**XxXx**

Morshu and the rest of his misfit group were waddling through the sands that covered most of the beach. A sweet sea breeze blew right into Fat Pikachu's nose, filling the rodent with glee before the scent escaped his nostrils.

"Ahh!" Fat Pikachu sighed in sweet relief. "This place has such a glorious fragrance to it! I feel like I could stay here forever and never feel pain or sorrow!"

"That's a lie right there," Morshu pessimistically commented. "Not with what will happen very soon."

"Oh, that," Gay Piplup groaned. Piplup tried his best to forget that soon, Station Square would fall into the hands of evil, but Morshu had to consistently keep reminding him of the impending doom.

"When's that supposed to happen anyways?" Mewtwo wondered after taking a sip of Capri-Sun. Morshu was just going to shrug as he wasn't entirely sure of it himself, but he quickly caught a glimpse of what was happening at Evil Marc's pizza stand. A giant radio antenna rose up from the ground, causing a miniature earthquake in the process.

"Right now!" the salesman screamed. "Run!" The quartet of misfits ran as fast as they could, making sure that they would get away from the chaos. Sadly, a claw poked through the sand, grabbing Gay Piplup's foot.

"Gay Piplup!" Fat Pikachu screamed as the owner of the claw, which was a Krabby with a bucket helmet on its head, dragged Gay Piplup down into the sand.

"Leave me here!" Gay Piplup cried out. "Save yourselves! Just make sure you survive!"

"Come on, we have no choice!" Mewtwo shouted to Fat Pikachu. Using his psychic powers, he quickly grabbed the fat mouse and tried to catch up to Morshu, who was oblivious to the fact that Piplup was captured. Gengar and Charmy flew over the two Pokémon as Espio and Vector tried to hold off an army of Evil Marc's minions off.

"Damn it, they're everywhere!" Vector cursed while he and Espio got surrounded by Evil Marc's new army.

"Boss, help!" Espio cried out. Vector turned his head to see his most loyal pal get dragged into the crowd of minions.

"No, Espio!" the croc screamed before he was tackled by the army. Evil Marc laughed maniacally as he noticed an odd feeling in his pants.

"Oh dear, it appears I have an hardened Pingas from all this chaos," the naughty brat stated. "Excuse me, my minions, but I must go masterbate... for you."

**XxXx**

"Why are we in Subspace?" Wario questioned. Wario, Waluigi, Weegee, and Dr. Eggman were wandering around the giant land of dark energy, which seemed to be eternal.

"It's pretty obvious that Walutena warped us here," Eggman answered. "Though the reason for that is still unknown."

"No duh, genius!" Weegee snorted. "How else do you think we got here?"

"Hey, you keep your mouth shut, you vermin!" Eggman snapped.

"Oh, so I'm the vermin?! Looks like the pot is calling the kettle black!"

"Uh, guys?" Waluigi said, desperately trying to get the attention of his two allies.

"What is it, you damn pest?!" Weegee roared right before the group got knocked over by a speeding figure. It was none other than the disturbing Walutena, being a Pingas as usual. The quartet of weirdos quickly got up to confront the jerk.

"Haha!" Walutena laughed. "Now that we are free of that horrid song, I can finally kick your asses!"

"Fucking genwunners..." Weegee cursed. "This place will be your death bed, bitch!"

"Getting edgy, huh?" the ugly fusion mocked. "That will only make this battle that more fun as I slaughter you!"

"We'll see about that, punk! Get it, boys!" Wario ordered. The group quickly rushed towards Walutena as ToxicXEternity's remix of Pokémon Red's Gym Leader theme started playing. Wario, due to the power of the Quickster's costume, easily out sped his allies.

"Autopingas!" Walutena shouted as it fired three censored bars from the staff it wielded. While the three other heroes were hit by the homing attacks, Wario's speed helped him dodge them as he started preforming his iconic Shoulder Bash while running. Walutena tried to block the attack with the staff, but Wario's power and speed allowed him to hurt the ugly clone anyways, sending it flying. He didn't stop running and kept pursuing the clone as it flew through the air. Wario leaped into the air and then began to slice right though Walutena's body multiple times before he curled up into a ball above it and smashed downwards, crushing Walutena between him and the ground. Wario quickly got up and started posing before Walutena warped right behind him and smashed the fat plumber with the staff.

Walutena then charged at Dr. Eggman, who was continuously firing fireballs from the volcano that was on his head. All of them missed as Walutena rapidly approached the scientist. Just as it was about to collide with Eggman however, Waluigi snagged it with his now stretchy arms before spinning it around, Mario 64 style, and tossing the fusion of himself away from the heroes. Right before landing, Walutena was hit by a punch by the now invisible Weegee, now being sent back. Weegee quickly teleported right behind the clone in midair and landed yet another punch on it. The evil meme continued to do this a few more times before he turned visible right above Walutena and prepared for another attack. This time, time froze for a second as a light enveloped around his feet. The light quickly disappeared as time was brought back to normal, allowing Weegee to stomp on Walutena.

The clone was sent hurdling towards the ground again as Eggman started charging up an attack from the volcano on his head. Right before the fusion hit the ground, Eggman unleashed a stream of fire onto the clone, burning it up before it was sent flying through the air yet again. This time, Walutena corrected itself in the air before teleporting away, right behind the oblivious Waluigi. By spinning around with the staff extended outwards, Walutena managed to strike Waluigi multiple times before kicking him towards the dark skies above. Quickly teleporting above the poor plumber, Walutena smashed him back towards the ground.

"Waa haa!" Walutena laughed as it appeared right next to the plumber. "Now it's time for Waluigi to die!"

"Not so fast, loser!" Waluigi shouted. However, the voice did not come from the Waluigi, which in reality was just a fake dummy of the annoying plumber, and instead came from behind Walutena. The hideous faker quickly turned its head to see the real Waluigi standing alongside Weegee.

"You fucking cheater!" Walutena screamed in a fit of rage. A dark, purple aura surrounded the ugly beast as its eyes turned dark red.

"Oh shit," Weegee cursed.

**XxXx**

"WAA!" Watharja yelled, taking notice of its fallen allies. The remainder of the WWE were leagues ahead of the Waluigi clone army, and were barely breaking a sweat. Tails smashed a Wachimchar into a pool of ice, cold water while Snake shot a Wamonoeye right in, you guessed it, the eye.

"Tell us where your leader took Wario, or we will beat the info out of you, punk!" Snake demanded.

"Geez, you should calm down," Watharja grumbled. "Besides, I have no idea. Walutena never tells me things like this. I mean, he or she or it is a big bastard who won't tell me diddly squat about crap."

"Really?" Metal Sonic asked.

"Yes, really," the ugly fusion assured. "I do have an idea on where that bitch of a master is though." Snake then got an wonderful, awful idea. An idea that would really make Walutena saltier than Nintendo apologists drinking their own salty tears.

"Why do you bother with that ass then?" Snake smirked. "I mean, you could actually do what YOU want, and not what that moron wants!" This heavily intrigued the Waluigi fusion. Turning its back to the WWE for a few moments, it thought about the idea of betraying Walutena.

"You know what?" Watharja grinned evilly. "Why the hell not?"

**XxXx**

The four WWE members inside Subspace were now having massive issues in defeating Walutena. The ugly god now possessed power that you couldn't believe. Or, at least seemingly had that type of power. Either way, Walutena had the upper hand. Wario and the rest of his crew were on their last legs, barely standing, as sweat dropped from their faces.

"Give it up, damn bitches!" Walutena shouted as fire surrounded it. "I have won! I am the ultimate lifeform!"

"Actually, that is Shadow the Hedgehog's title," Fastidious Beaver, who somehow entered the giant hellhole known as Subspace, corrected the god. Wario and Co. just stared at him oddly as Walutena fired a Autopingas at the annoying beaver, who was sent flying into the depths of Subspace. Don't worry Fastidious, you'll get your chance... another day.

"Gee, that sure was odd," Weegee muttered to himself. "Anyways, we're not about to back down that fucking easily!"

"Man, you guy's must really like getting your asses whooped real bad," the ugly Waloser commented. "Oh well, that seems like fun! Prepare yourselves, because it is time for you to die!"

"Not on our watch, mister!" a voice from behind called. Walutena groaned, wondering just what was going to happen this time. Turning to the voice, it was shocked to see the rest of the WWE, as well as Watharja, all in battle stances.

"What the- Watharja, why are you doing here?! And why are these delinquents with you?!" the god growled.

"Delinquents? You sure are a big talker!" Watharja laughed. The dark mage was sure enjoying this moment. "At least they have some sort of intellect, unalike you!"

"WHAT?!" the Waloser screamed, causing the ground to crack slightly. "YOU MEAN TO TELL ME THAT YOU ARE BETRAYING ME?!"

"Cry all you want, because your tears are delicious," Watharja continued, not intimidated at all. "Face it: you were a horrid leader who doesn't have a damn idea on how to run an army or any of that crap. I had to help you every damn step of the way. Well, guess what? I ain't taking that shit anymore! I'm going to kick your ass, and show you how to be a real villain!"

"I. WILL. KILL YOU!" Watharja's ex-master roared. Subspace itself turned into a void of fire as Walutena rammed straight towards Watharja at full speed. The dark mage merely smirked, knowing that this joker will never win.

"Take this, fool!" Malleo screamed as he whipped out the stereo, playing GlitchXCity's remix of Hoenn's Battle Frontier. Walutena screamed in absolute pain as it fell to the floor, unable to take the all mighty power of Gen three and GlitchXCity.

"Oh yeah, payback time, baby!" Waluigi smirked as he stretched his arms out to grab the ugly Waloser by the legs. Everyone gathered around the loser, beginning to beat the living daylights out of the now powerless wimp. Punching, kicking, laser beams, it didn't matter. All the torture Walutena put them through made this all justifiable. Besides, it was a ugly and evil moron. Walutena deserved every second of it.

"This is more fun than the time I ate those hot dogs on the roller coaster when I was two!" Wario grinned.

"Not going to ask," Weegee replied. "Not like I could care though. This is wonderful!"

"N-no..." Walutena groaned, bleeding from all over. "It... can't... end... this damn way!" A white light enveloped the area as the group were sent back into the throne room of Walutena's fortress. None of the WWE paid attention to it until Walutena used up the last of its power to sending the attackers flying away.

"Sounds like someone's saltier than usual," Watharja mocked. "Good thing, I'm all out of salty tears to drink!"

"No... fuck you," Walutena wheezed, crawling over to a large machine. Wario and his pals were confused as to why the Waloser was dragging itself all the way to said machine until it spoke again. "If... I go down... you will all go down with me! Prepare to fell the wrath of nuclear energy blow you to hell and back!"

"What the- you cheapskate!" Weegee shouted. "Trying to take us down with you?! Have you gone mad?! Er, forget that, you were mad since your conception."

"No..." Walutena gagged. "Even... if you have stopped me here... I will be back... to haunt you in the afterlife..." The evil clone then pulled a lever as the room was filled with a red light.

"NUCLEAR SELFDESTRUCT ENGAGED," a robotic voice sternly said. "TEN MINIUTES TO DETANATION."

"Run while... you can," Walutena choked as the WWE and Watharja realized that Waloser's eyes were now just black holes with blood leaking out of them. "You might just live... but if you do... you will face me again."

"Quick, let's ditch this joint!" Metal Sonic ordered as everyone left the room.

**XxXx**

"Crazy! What are you doing with us?!" Falco wondered. Crazy Hand had him and the Kirby Crew in his big, white grasp as he flew away from Walutena's fortress.

"I SMELL NUCLEAR ENERGY FROM THERE!" Crazy spazzingly panicked. "THAT, AND PICKLES! Mmmm... nuclear pickles..."

"I have no idea on what is going on anymore," Kirby groaned.

"Hey, has anyone else noticed the sky is really orange now?" King Dedede commented while staring off into the dark orange skies.

"I think I know why!" Pac Man shouted, pointing to what was once Station Square. Now, it was a burning metropolis, with Evil Marc statues scattered across it. The sign that once read "Welcome to Station Square!" now said "Welcome to Marctopolis, land of depression".

"Sweet Nova, what has happened to our town?" Meta Knight said with tons of worry.


	11. Ch 11: Finally Reunited

**Chapter 11: Finally Reunited**

"How the hell did Walutena get nuclear energy to begin with?!" Snake asked the traitorous Watharja as the WAA Weirdos Emissary ran through the hallways of Walutena's crumbling fortress.

"Waloser doesn't have any nuclear energy," Watharja answered. "That wimp just likes to make over exaggerated threats to act tough. Course, this place will still explode in just a few minutes."

"Well, I'm at least partially relieved," Weegee sighed.

"I'm just creeped out about how Walutena looked before we left the throne room," Wario said with a shiver. He truly was terrified of the disturbing image of the Waluigi imposter with its bleeding, empty eye sockets.

"I've seen worse," Weegee replied as he jumped over a burning carcass. "But yeah, that was pretty creepy."

"Can we please focus about that later and just focus and leaving this place?!" Duck Hunt Dog cried out.

"It shouldn't be much longer," Watharja assured. "Just keep running!"

"Just keep running, just keep running, just keep running, running, running, running..." Waluigi awkwardly sang.

"Waluigi, are you serious right now?!" Tails groaned.

**XxXx**

"I'm still confused about this shit," Morshu cursed. He, as well as his pals Mewtwo and Fat Pikachu, Falco, Crazy, the Kirby Crew, Gengar, Charmy, and Scratcher were on the tallest hill of the Seaside Hill Zone, which was still blanketed by the orange sky.

"Me too," Meta Knight commented while scratching his nonexistent chin. "I mean, characters from alternative universes? Some idiot taking over Station Square? This is blowing my mind!"

"Well, we should stop acting like fat, lazy morons and figure out on how we can save our town!" Dedede shouted.

"Speaking of fat morons, are you eve going to lose some weight and go to school?" Scratcher insulted. Dedede turned his body towards the robotic chicken as flames grew within his eyes.

"WHAT WAS THAT, PUNK?!" Dedede roared as his head grew to massive proportions.

"Gahh!" was all Scratcher could scream before Dedede fell to the ground while entering unconsciousness. Meta Knight stood behind him with a giant pot in his hands.

"Sorry, Dededork here has some major anger issues," Meta groaned.

"Speaking of anger issues, why isn't Kirby fucking pissed as usual?" Mewtwo wondered.

"That's because our Kirby is not the same as the MMMB's," Meta started. "You see, the MMMB's Kirby is actually a clone that was born and raised in America, the land of the pissed and edgy. Thus, he wound up being the ticked off jerk he is."

"Well, that explains a lot," Charmy stated.

"Now that we have that out of the damn way, I suppose it is time to kick some evil clone ass?" Morshu said, itching to save Station Square.

"I still say we wait for the rest of our gang to show up first!" Crazy Hand spazzed.

"Now, hold on," Meta Knight said. "As much as I would love the extra help from the rest of your... unique club, didn't you say that your leader is stubborn? How do we know that the rest of your club will help us?"

**XxXx**

"TWENTY SECONDS TIL DETONATION," a voice echoed throughout the crumbling fortress. "PLEASE EVACUATE IMMEDIATELY."

"There's not enough time!" Duck Hunt Dog cried as the emissary ran towards the exit.

"If only we could stop the explosion! Where's an off button when you need it?!" Wario shouted.

"Need help?" the ever fantastic Off Button asked.

"No, now go away!" Wario roared before kicking Off Button out of the fortress.

"Wario, you fucking dumbass!" Weegee screamed. "That thing could have saved us!"

"No way! That Off Button is a cheapskate!" Wario retorted.

"ATTENTION: COUNTDOWN FOR DETONATION APPEARS TO BE OFF," the robotic voice said. "DETONATION WILL COMENCE IN TWO HOURS."

"Woah, seriously?" Metal Sonic said in awe.

"Eh, we were right in front of the door anyways," Tails replied as the gang walked out of the fort.

"Wait... why is the damn sky orange?" Malleo wondered, looking up to the rusty orange sky while the WWE kept walking away from the fort. Before anyone could answer, the fortress suddenly blew up behind them, sending rock bits everywhere.

"NOPE, COUNTDOWN WAS FINE. OH WELL, WHO GIVES A CRAP," the robotic voice said.

"Well, that was odd," Snake commented. "Although, Malleo does bring up an interesting point: what is with the sky?"

"I have another interesting point: take a look over there!" Waluigi cheered. He pointed to the east, where a group of creatures were approaching the WWE from. Everyone instantly recognized two of the figures.

"It's Falco and Crazy Hand!" Wario squealed before he ran for his two pals. Everyone quickly followed as the figures came into better view.

"WARIO! I LIKE HAM AND APPLES!" Crazy spazzed as he picked up his speed.

"Thank you bread lord for reuniting us!" Falco said as the two groups were now standing in front of each other.

"You guys are alive!" Malleo said.

"I'm guessing this is the rest of your clique?" Meta Knight asked Falco.

"Yep!" Falco happily answered. "Time for our chant, guys!"

"You got it! I'm Wario, the leader!"

"Waluigi, the sidekick!"

"Falco, the bread guy!"

"Crazy Hand, the crazy guy!"

"Weegee, the villain!"

"Snake, the pervert!"

"Duck Hunt Dog, the spy!"

"Malleo, the Sonic 06 hater!"

"Tails, the nerdy kid!"

"Dr. Eggman, the scientist!"

"Metal Sonic, the personality-lacking robot!"

"Mermaid Man, the mentor!"

"Wait, since when was Eggman or his bland robot a part of our group?" Crazy wondered.

"Long story," Wario shrugged. "More importantly, why is the sky orange? It wasn't like this earlier!"

"Take a look for yourselves," Gengar ordered as he pointed to what was once known as Station Square, now known as Marctopolis. The WAA Weirdos Emissary stood in awe, gazing at the once happy city, now a complete wasteland. "Most of the city has been taken over by some jerk named Evil Marc, and now most of the inhabitants are under mind control!"

"I knew those bucket helmets were no good!" Wario growled.

"Well, I'm not about to let Gay Piplup go down in vain like that!" Fat Pikachu said. "Let's go free the town!"

"How do you propose we do that?" Weegee questioned. "We can't just run into a taken over metro like a bunch of babbling idiots like Wario, you know!"

"Hey, uncalled for!" Wario said, not taking the insult lightly.

"Well, we have to take out those radio towers," Kirby answered while everyone ignored our favorite moron. "It's pretty simple."

"How many towers are there though?" Dr. Eggman added.

"Two," Meta Knight said. "One is here in the Seaside Hill, while the other one is out in the middle of town. The problem is that the town is bound to have minions everywhere, so we can't just plow our way through. We have to be sneaky and quick about it."

"Sounds like a plan to me," the now conscious Dedede commented. "I suppose we should get going?"

"Just what I was thinking," Wario responded. "Let's find the first radio tower!"

**XxXx**

Both the WWE Master Hand and his CTH counterpart were inside of the Olive Garden of Grape Gardens, sitting in the very back of the restaurant as possible. WWE Master Hand was upset about something, but he didn't really show it, because HE'S A FREAKING HAND HOW IS HE SUPPOSED TO SHOW EMOTION ITS LIKE EXPECTING WOLF TO DO NON-WOLF THINGS OMG. Despite this, CTH Master Hand could sense his counterpart's concern.

"What's up, me?" CTH Master Hand inquired. "Why aren't you eating?"

"I feel that something is not right..." WWE Master Hand trailed off.

"If it's about both of us being in a public place, don't worry. People here have seen weirder things."

"No, that's not it. I just have a feeling that Station Square is in major trouble right now."

"Why? With the Cute Toot House there, I doubt anything bad would happen."

"I guess it's just a gut feeling. I should take my mind off it for a while."

"Good idea."

**XxXx**

"Gather, my minions!" Evil Marc, who was standing on the remains of the Smash Mansion, commanded.

"We're already surrounding you!" a mind controlled Goomba said.

"Oh, damn," the evil clone groaned. "Anyways, I have a special announcement!"

"Hooray, the new spatulas are here!" a Shy Guy minion cheered while dancing.

"Shut the hell up, there are no new spatulas!" Evil Marc shouted. The Shy Guy stopped dancing before Evil Marc and Cheese continued his speech. "Why would we care about some damn spatulas anyways?!"

"Because all of the old one's are broken!" a minion Eggplant Wizard complained. She pointed to a pile of broken, burnt, and eaten spatulas laying not to far away from a giant grill. "Now we can't have any hamburgers until we get new ones!"

"And this is why you don't leave minions with buckets covering their eyes to do cooking," Evil Marc thought inside his head. "OK, we do have a problem there. What I would like to know is why exactly are those things are wrecked anyways?"

"Now you people will have to deal with starvation, just like how I have to," a voice from behind a giant apartment from across the street whispered before the owner of said voice ran away from the scene.

**XxXx**

"What is wrong with this place?!" WWE Lucario yelled as he ran away from a herd of angry Tauros. "And why are there Tauros in this place?!"

"That's what I'd like to know," Doc Brown, who was busy driving his time-traveling DeLorean alongside Lucario, said. "I wish I just stayed back home..."

"Me too, this place is a wreck," Lucario groaned. "And I thought staying at the Smasher's Palace was weird as heck."

**XxXx**

"What's with this place?" WWE Funky Kong questioned. He was sitting on top of one of the many Evil Marc statues laid scattered across Marctopolis. "Now all of the jazz is lost, and now someone needs to deliver some funkiness to brighten this place up!" Swiftly pulling out his saxophone, he began to play Route 111 of Ruby and Sapphire on it. The many minions below heard the song.

"Wait, where is that jazz coming from?" a mind controlled Kritter wondered.

"Who cares, this jazz is sweet!" a minion Knuckle Joe replied before he began to dance. Everyone around him also began to dance, not resisting the sweet tunes of Funky's saxophone.

"This should expand dong, and it does!" Donkey Kong screamed before he started dancing himself. None of the minions cared about the big ape, since they were too occupied with Funky's jazz.

"It looks like those goons enjoy jazz," Paul Blaurt commented. He, as well as Mr. Ressetti, Steven Stone (quit expecting Steven Universe, you guys), and Scooby Doo were also standing on top of a Marc statue, spying on Evil Marc and Cheese's henchmen.

"Reah, but rho can resist razz?" Scooby said as he began to dance.

"Razz? As in, Razz berries?" Steven questioned, quickly pulling out three Razz berries from his bag.

"Can we please focus on the fact that they are distracted by jazz?!" Mr. Ressetti, being his cranky old self, shouted.

"He's right," Paul agreed. "This appears to be their main weakness. And we all know that there is only one type of music better than jazz..."

"Heavy metal?" Steven replied.

"Hell no! Rock and roll!" Paul yelled.

"Please, all rock does is melt the brain," Ressetti grumbled.

"Shut up, you geezer," Steven said. "But what good will some rock music do? And even then, where are we supposed to get some if all off the music stores have been destroyed?"

"If my calculations are correct, rock should be powerful enough to completely obliterate the bucket helmets," Paul said.

"Or just melt their brains," Ressetti said.

"Plus, according to my rock detector, someone is carrying a record with Goofy Goober Rock on it."

"Rut where ris the record?" Scooby asked.

"It appears to be in the possession of someone in the Seaside Hill Zone," Paul said while taking a quick look at his rock detector. "While these minions are distracted, I think we should be able to head back to the Pizza Hut and tell this to Nook."

"Sounds like a plan to me," Steven nodded as everyone climbed down the statue.

**XxXx**

"Excellent!" Dolan cheered. "Our little clone has taken Station Square over for us!"

"Oh boy!" Gooby grinned. "Now we can move our stuff there, right?"

"Not yet," the derpy duck villain responded. "After all, this is merely a distraction while we gather more supplies for our true takeover."

"Like what?" Spoderman asked. "We already have that army of glitch Pokémon, what else do we need?"

"That answer is simple, my friend," Dolan answered. "We still need the Elite Four from the Pokémon Adventures manga. They will help us takeover Station Square for real. And once we have that accomplished..."

"We kill them too?" Bigs finished.

"Exactly, mai boi!" Dolan said. "But first, I must head to Bikini Bottom. Plankton said that the universal transporter is finally finished."

"It's about time," Gooby derpily said. "I'm coming with, Dolan!"

"You're doing what? I'm sorry, but I didn't know that the universal transporter excited you in that kind of way," Dolan teased.

"Dolan, why you tease me like that?!" Gooby groaned.

"Gooby please," Dolan quoted.

**XxXx**

"What happened here?" Zinnia, the long lost sister of Ryuko, said, staring at the ruins of the once happy Station Square from the southern outskirts of said city. "This place looks horrid!"

"Why on Earth are we here?" Aster, the Whismur wondered as she scratched the back of her head. "I thought we weren't plot relevant."

"Oh, we're not, my little darling, Zinnia answered. "LucarioFan3 just brought us here as filler."

"I did not!" the stupid fanfic writer retorted. "Well, OK, maybe a little..."

"OK..." Aster trailed off as the duo made their way into the city, leaving LF3 all by his lonesome.

**XxXx**

"There it is! The radio tower of Seaside Hill!" Meta Knight said as the small army approached the giant radio antenna.

"Now let's take it down!" Fat Pikachu yelled as he charged for the tower, before Morshu blocked him.

"Hold it, pal! This place is guarded!" Morshu warned the fat mouse.

"OK, here's the plan: Waluigi, Morshu, Mewtwo, Kirby, and I will climb up the tower while everyone else stays down here to handle the guards," Wario suggested.

"Not a bad plan. Pretty damn shocking," Weegee commented.

"Then what are we waiting for?! For my best pal!" Fat Pikachu screamed his battle cry before everyone charged for the tower. The herd of brain washed Snorlax noticed them and charged for them as well. Wario, Waluigi, and the rest of those who were to climb the tower leaped over the enemies and were completely unnoticed by them.

"Take this!" Crazy shouted as he fired a finger bullet at two Snorlax.

"For our lord and savoir, BREAD!" Falco screamed. He quickly pulled out his laser-pooping gum, which began pooping lasers at the fat, mind controlled Pokémon. This was a pretty disgusting sight that belonged, you know, IN THE BATHROOM.

"How long will it take to climb this thing?" Kirby questioned.

"Beats me," Wario stated. "But that doesn't matter! We must reach the top!"

*Tycoon Waltz form Final Fantasy V starts playing*

**2 Hours Later...**

"We're getting there!" Wario roared as the group continued climbing, starting to get tired.

**Another 2 Hours Later...**

"We're a quarter of a way there... man, I'm tired!"

**Yet Another 2 Hours Later...**

"We're... halfway... to halfway... there!"

**Even Yet Another 2 Hours Later...**

"We... are just a few hundred feet away from... the halfway mark..."

**So Much Later That No One Cared Anymore Later...**

"I think... oh, who cares... I just want to sleep and eat lotsa spaghetti right now..."

**So Much Later That Patrick Ran Out Of Time Cards And Had To Buy This One From The Bargain Mart Later...**

"Finally... the top..."

"Quit complaining and just let me destroy this thing!" Morshu screamed as he tossed a bomb at the antenna. The entire tower collapsed as Wario and his gang fell to the ground. Thankfully, they survived the fall without a single crash, because that totally makes sense. The Snorlax's bucket helmets broke, causing the Pokémon to cheer before they fell asleep.

"We did it!" Falco squealed.

"Yes, but our work is far from done," Meta Knight reminded the space idiot. "Now, we must invade "Marctopolis" and destroy the second tower!"

"Can we do that in... oh... twelve years... I'm so tired..." Kirby whined.

"We can rest for five minutes," Fat Pikachu said. "Then, it's onto freeing the city!"

"Oh come on!" Mewtwo begged. "I'm in so much damn pain right now... at least six years of rest, please!"

"Does anyone else here that music?" Crazy said, obviously referring to the Tycoon Waltz.

"Why does it sound familiar?" Malleo thought. Weegee then realized just where he heard this theme before. He quickly ran away, before he had to deal with the wrath of the most evil creatures throughout the multiverse.

SPINDA, MASTERS OF THE UNIVERSE.

"Say, what are those things?" Scratcher wondered, pointing to an army of figures slowly approaching them.

"Fuck, a Spinda herd!" Morshu whimpered as everyone began to ran away. "Run for your damn lives!

"Will the WAA Weirdos Emissary save Station Square?" the narrator asked.

"Not this guy too!" Metal Sonic groaned.

"What other tricks does Dolan and his crew have in store? Will this theme quit playing? Will the emissary escape the horrors of Spinda? Will Teddy quit making un"bear"able puns? Find out next time on the WAA Weirdos Emissary!"


	12. Ch 12: Marctopolis

**Chapter 12: Marctopolis**

The ever disturbing, orange color filled the skies over the remains of Station Square, now known as Marctopolis, as Evil Marc was pacing around the remains of the Smash Mansion.

"Gah," Evil Marc wheezed. "Where are those lousy patrollers?!"

"Right here, ssssssssir!" a bucket head Ekans hissed as he and a goon Eggplant Wizard approached their master.

"Have you two found anything suspicious?" Evil Marc wondered.

"Outside of Donkey Kong, no sir," the Eggplant Wizard reported.

"Wait, why in the fuck did you just let him roam around my city, then?!"

"Becassssse, if we got clossssse to that pessssst, we would ssssstart dancing," Ekans replied.

"Yeah, somehow some jazz started playing by the gates of Seaside Hill," Eggplant Wizard added. "Anyone who came close would start boogying to death!"

"Blast it all... I fucking hate jazz..." Evil Marc and Cheese groaned. "Well, get out there and find out where that jazz is coming from!"

"Yesssss sssssir."

"And quit hissing so damn much! It's annoying as hell!"

"Shut the hell up, sssssscrub!"

**XxXx**

"Take this, Cunt Toot House!"

The Hot Topic Krew, Cute Toot House, and Memememememe Brigade were in the midst of their large battle, with the edgehead crew losing. Somehow, none of them cared about the fact that their entire city had been taken over. Their battle was taking place not too far away from the HTK's Chuck E. Cheese hideout, which was beginning to fall apart. Sonic poked his head out of the hideout, as he managed to free himself while the Krew were out doing stupid things, quickly noticing Sonic Robo fighting alongside his crew.

"Shoot! They don't seem to realize that "Sonic" there is an imposter!" Sonic muttered. "I gotta go tell them the truth, Super Sonic style!"

"Oh no you don't!" a voice from behind responded. Sonic was quickly ensnared by a lap sack bag and was dragged away. The owner of said voice was none other than the newest member of the Dolan United Krew, Prudo, AKA Dolan's pet dog, who was also dragging the bag that Sanic- I mean Sonic- was in.

"Seriously?! I got out of that place only to get captured again?!" Sonic whined.

**XxXx**

The WWE, Kirby Crew, Morshu, Mewtwo, Fat Pikachu, Watharja, Gengar, Charmy, and Scratcher were standing right at the gates of Marctopolis, eager to barge in and kick the stupid edgy clone's ass real good. Of course, that plan you just get them all killed. Wario, Waluigi, Weegee, and Dr. Eggman were back to wearing their regular outfits, instead of their tacky costumes.

"What's the plan, Meta Nerd?" Wario asked their temporary ally, Meta Knight.

"Never call me that again," Meta Knight sternly said. "Either way, I think it is best if we send someone who can fly over the gates and see what is going on in there."

"Not it!" King Dedede swiftly said.

"We're not doing it that way, Dedede!" Pac Man argued.

"I'll do it!" Kirby volunteered, raising his hand in the process.

"Now Kirby, you do realize that you are risking your life in doing this?" Gengar asked.

"Of course! I will risk my life to let this town see happiness again!" the pink puffball replied. Meta Knight smiled at this, though his mask made said smile impossible to see.

"That's Kirby for you," the knight said. "Go for it, young warrior." Kirby then kept to his word and inhaled a large portion of air before taking to the skies. He stopped as soon as he was above the gates, noticing that there were no enemies about. Turning around, he floated down.

"It's all clear down there!" Kirby said with a smile.

"Good. Now, I suggest that we split up to cover more ground," Meta Knight suggested.

"All right, leave that to me! I'll decide who goes on what team!" Wario eagerly said.

"Prepare to die of Wario's bad plans," Weegee whispered to Dedede, whose eyes widened.

"All members of the WAA Weirdos Emissary will be in one group!" Wario continued.

"Can I shoot myself now?" the annoying meme whined.

"Shut up!" Waluigi demanded as he whipped out Dark Pit's staff and pointed it at Weegee.

"Kirby Crew, you guys will be as a group, and we will have Gamerfan64 write whatever you guys do while we are apart," the yellow plumber added.

"Who's Gamerfan64?" Clyde thought.

"A stupid guy who likes to torture me," King Dedede groaned.

"Jerk!" Gamerfan64 said from his spot in the mountains east of Station Square, somehow overhearing Dedede's rude comment.

"The rest of you guys can go off on your own," Wario finished.

"Waa, how wonderful," Watharja grumbled. "I get stuck with four complete strangers."

"Shut up, freak of nature," Mewtwo insulted.

"Is this really the time for that, Mewtwo?" Morshu sternly asked as his arms crossed.

"I suppose not," Mewtwo sighed. "But that doesn't stop that thing from being hideous."

"Fucking bitch," Watharja thought to itself.

"Alright team, let's get to work!" Wario eagerly commanded.

"Break down the gates!" Snake roared. Wario pulled out the Dinner Blaster while Waluigi pointed the staff at the gates. Snake tossed a grenade at the gates while the Wario Bros. fired their weapons.

"This explosion scene was written by Michael Bay," Malleo commented as the gates exploded into absolute nothing, thanks to a combination of the attacks. Said explosion could be seen from so far away that even Dr. Robotnik and Grounder saw the explosion from the Battle Resort.

"Well, we're going to be caught for sure now," Weegee sighed. The explosion cleared up, revealing that a ton of bucket helmet minions were sitting there, sleeping and completely unaware of the blast that had just happened.

"Well, all logic has officially been broken," Duck Hunt Dog muttered.

"Who cares, Lady Luck is on our side today!" Waluigi responded. "Besides, no fanfictions we ever enter have logic!"

"Point taken," everyone's favorite dog nodded. The entire gang ran into the city before moving onto their separate ways.

**XxXx**

"No more."

*Pokémon Black/ White Elite 4 theme starts to play*

"I must fight. My home has been taken from me. The will rule the world if I don't do something. They must pay!"

The strange rock inside Team Magma's base was radiating purple. Soon, a purple shape came crawling out of the cracks, which quickly morphed into a black hole-like head, with green eyes and mouth.

"I... am... SPIRITOMB!"

The creature hopped over to what was once Maxie's desk, looking at the results of the Mega Stone project Team Magma once attempted. They thought the hadn't created a legitimate Mega Stone, but they did. The stone itself was purple, while the Mega Stone Symbol in the center was a mixture of brown and green.

"This is... the Spiritombite."

A purple hand squeezed out from one of the cracks on Spiritomb's keystone, swiftly grabbing the Mega Stone without hesitation. Looking at it quietly, Spiritomb grinned at the small rock.

"Now, to find my destined master... the fallen wing."

**XxXx**

"Wow, this place is barren as hell! Where are the minions?!"

The WWE were wandering around the street once known as Join Avenue, looking for the radio tower that controlled the bucket heads. However, their luck was very low, and the gang were left with no clues whatsoever.

"You'd think there would be some sort of idiot goon running around this joint!" Snake growled, really wanting to kick some ass.

"I think I hear something!" Crazy Hand said.

"Like what, Donkey Kong and Panty doing the naughty?" Weegee sarcastically asked. Everyone else just stared at him with disgusted looks on their faces. Weegee sighed at them not getting the joke. "You guys do realize that it was just a joke, right?"

"Oh, a Donkey Kong X Juice reference! I get it!" Wario replied before laughing.

**Meanwhile...**

Morshu and the rest of his gang were staring at a very disturbing scene that was taking place before their very eyes. Let's just say that it involved an ape, a female fallen angel, an Expand Dong, and the yummy stuff. Thankfully, 4Kidz managed to censor this scene for us.

**Back With The WWE...**

"Let's be serious here!" Mermaid Man ordered.

"Either way, it sounds like a huge herd of something is coming this way, right behind us!" Crazy added to his previous statement. Everyone turned to the direction from where they came to see Funky Kong being chased by a herd of Foggers from the SpongeBob Movie video game.

"Foggers!" Metal Sonic exclaimed.

"I say we take them out, rock n' roll style!" Wario smirked while pulling out the Dinner Blaster, which was currently in some sort of guitar form. "Oh, and a hint of dinner style too!"

"Way ahead of ya, old pal!" Waluigi replied as he pulled out Dark Pit's staff, also in a guitar form. Both started playing music on their respective weapons, sending the music directly towards the Fogger hoard. Both attacks struck a Fogger each, which eventually started a chain reaction of Foggers bumping into each other and defeating each other.

"Wow, that was tight!" Funky wheezed as he walked up to the emissary. "Thanks for saving me!"

"No problem, Funky!" Waluigi said.

"I hate to break it to you guys, but it looks like we have more company!" Tails yelled. Everyone else looked aound to notice that Foggers were arriving from all directions.

"Heh, no problem!" Wario laughed. "Take 'em out!"

"Aye, will do!" Mermaid Man obeyed. Water ball after water ball, everyone's favorite hero kept eliminating Foggers, one by one. Metal Sonic rolled into a small group of enemies gather like a set of bowling pins using his Spin Dash. Three Foggers each held up a sign, two of which had a ten on them, while one had "9.8/ 10, it's not Call of Duty" on it. Falco then charged into the 9.8/ 10 Fogger using his Fire Bird attack, while the other two walked away from the battle.

"WEEEEEEWOOOOOOWEEEEEEWOOOOO!" Crazy Hand spazzed, ramming into a massive group of Foggers.

"Lookout, Slammers!" Wario warned his companions as another herd of SpongeBob Movie enemies approached the battle.

"Leave it to me!" Tails volunteered. He quickly got close to them and tossed out a huge amount of Dummy Rings, which paralyzed the whole troop of opponents. Duck Hunt Dog then began to blast them with his Super Scope, defeating them quickly.

**XxXx**

Chrom stood above the tallest building in Marctopolis, staring at the radio tower. His eyes twitched, as he was surely insane at this point without his glorious fishsticks.

"Heh... heheh... heheheheHAHAHAHAHA!" Chrom laughed before leaping down, impaling a bucket head Goomba in the most badass way possible once he reached the ground. Blood splattered everywhere as soon as the Goomba and Falchion met. Chrom didn't care about anything anymore though. He just wanted his fishsticks back, and until he got them, he would murder anyone he saw. "FISHSTICKS ARE LEMONS! ALL BOW BEFORE GRIMA! I LOVE JAZZ! FIGHT ME IN REAL LIFE! I WANT FISHSTICKS!" Man, Chrom would be the perfect husbando for Courtney of Team Magma right now.

**XxXx**

The WAA Weirdos Emissary were running away from a massive army of Foggers, Slammers, Flingers, and a bunch of other SpongeBob Movie enemies that were keeping up with our heroes.

"Keep running!" Wario, who was legitimately scared for once, screamed.

"Rolling around at the speed of sound..." Falco sang.

"Not now, dumbass!" Weegee ordered his comrade.

"Does anyone of any good ideas?!" Malleo begged to know.

"I have one!" Dr. Eggman said. "There should be a nuclear power plant farther down this road! If we can reach it without getting caught by those weirdos behind us, we may be able to trick them into following us!"

"What good would that do us?" Snake pondered.

"The nuclear energy from there should be able to cause a malfunction within the bucket helmets' circuitry, leading to the devices to fail and fall apart."

"OK wise guy, now tell us how we will totally not get nuclear radiation from that place!" Waluigi said.

"The radiation is too weak to do any damage to any living thing or highly advanced robot," Tails stated. "It will only effect low quality technology."

"Good enough for me!" Wario said.

**XxXx**

"Ha... haha... I... am not only alive... I am much stronger than before..."

The skies over Seaside Hill were quickly covered with blood red clouds, all sending down blue thunderbolts to the ground. It soon began to rain blood and fire as the storm quickly intensified. A lone figure stood on a cliff overlooking the vast ocean of the once happy resort.

"My last plan... was stupid. I realize that now. Thankfully, I have a much better scheme now. One that will cause just as much pain and depression, and will have twice the bloodshed! I must revive the real original project that took place on the Space Colony Ark. The demon that nearly sent that place hurdling down towards this blasted planet, riding the world of its pathetic lifeforms. I must revive... Death Hand."

The figure disappeared at the speed of light itself as the storm swiftly ended, leaving the Seaside Hill back to its orange skies.

**XxXx**

The emissary were running through the southern part of town, were Marc statues were being placed, and were the skies were actually the regular blue. Trees still filled the park, no carcasses laid in the street, and the statues were in small portions.

"Wow, this place ain't half bad!" Tails commented.

"Good thing we freed those civilians from the wrath of this Evil Marc guy!" Waluigi said. "Now, they can stay here in peace until we save the rest of the city from that big, fat meanie!"

"I wonder if that moron is even aware of our existence yet," Weegee added.

"I sure am aware, thank you very much!" Evil Marc shouted from the top of the biggest statue in the area. Pressing a button on his edgy remote, all of the statues began firing laser beams at our heroes.

"Oh, nice. Fucking lasers," Snake groaned.

"I really hope that Morshu's gang and the Kirby Crew aren't going through as much crap as we are," Weegee stated, actually being compassionate for once.

**XxXx**

Morshu and his crew were running through the remains of the Capri Sun Factory, trying to stay hidden from the goons outside, while trying to find some useful equipment.

"We can't sit here and hide! We have to avenge my best pal!" Fat Pikachu stated.

"Jesus, it's not like Gay Piplup is dead, just under mind control. We don't need to avenge him," Mewtwo said.

"He may be alive, but that doesn't mean he isn't going through a lot of pain right now!" the fat mouse argued. "I mean, mind control still sucks! Hell, some could consider it worse than death!"

"Calm down. We must stay focused on finding that radio tower," Morshu reminded his two friends as the group walked through a hill that lead them to the top of the rubble of the factory.

"Say, that's it over there!" Watharja pointed out, as everyone stared at the tower that loomed over the mall to the east.

"Over there!" Gay Luigi, who randomly popped out of thin air, shouted, pointing in the same direction.

"Ughhh... it's been one of those days," Morshu sighed. Gay Luigi wasn't exactly best pals with the Koridian, though they weren't enemies either. Morshu just found Gay Luigi annoying.

"Let's go and destroy it!" Fat Pikachu insisted.

"No way we're going to be able to destroy that damn thing without the help of those alternate universe freaks and those dicks of the Kirby Crew!" Mewtwo argued. "That place is bound to be guarded to hell and back, to the point were even I, the taker of lives, can't handle!"

"Pussy," Watharja insulted. Normally, Mewtwo would murder someone for an insult like that, but now was not the time.

"I'll get you back for that later," the edgy jerk said with a cold tone on his voice.

**XxXx**

"Alright, gang!" Paul Blaurt said to his small army, consisting of Mr. Ressetti, Scooby, Steven and his Pokémon, and a bunch of other guys. "Are you ready to defeat Evil Marc and save our town?!"

"I'm ready to actually reset things for once!" Mr. NO RESETING cheered.

"Rot really..." Scooby moaned, obviously afraid.

"For the peace of our world!" Steven shouted.

"For kibble!" Cosmo the fairy said.

"This world of ours has went through enough pain and suffering. I will do anything to end that," Blaze the Cat stated.

"Now, let's charge through Station Square and take back what is ours!" Paul shouted at the top of his lungs. He then ran towards the remains of the Smash Mansion, with his massive army right behind him.

**XxXx**

Lucina of the WWE universe was crying on her bed, tears staining her bed. Pikachu opened the door, wondering what was going on.

"Sheesh, what's she crying about?" he thought to himself.

"She's crying over Waluigi and what is happening to the alternate universe that he is in," a voice within Pikachu answered.

"Father Arceus? Is that you?" Pikachu said in his mind.

"Yes. I must ask that you head back into your room. I have something to tell you there. It not only concerns that universe and ours, but all universes. From the one where people protect the Seaside Hill Zone, to the one where Metal Luigi kills for world domination, to the one where Tomadachi Life creates reality, and ever single last one in between." Arceus replied.

"Sweet legendries... what is going on in that world... Is it Wario's fault?"

"No. In fact, he and his ragtag team are the only ones who can prevent it at the current moment. As strange as it sounds, Wario was right: that world is in danger. But not because of the clubs ruining the place. A true evil will arise soon. One stronger than me."


	13. Ch 13: Rock N' Roll Power

**Chapter 13: Rock N' Roll Power**

The WWE Pikachu, Greninja, Jigglypuff, and Arceus were in Pikachu's room, discussing about the issues within the CTH universe.

"So, a group of villains with that other universe are going to gather together and revive some sort of monster called the Death Hand?" Pikachu asked his foster father.

"Well, that's the TL;DR version, but yes," Arceus replied. "Sadly, I know little about this Death Hand character, but I do know that he will cause chaos across all fan fiction dimensions."

"We can't let anything like that happen!" Jigglypuff said with pride.

"But what can we do about it? If we all go that alternate universe at once, mass panic and confusion is bound to spread, and we will not accomplish anything!" Greninja stated.

"Correct, Greninja," Arceus said. "This is why I plan to go there alone and find the Cute Toot House version of myself, while you three spread the word of what will happen."

"Sounds like a plan," Pikachu said while cracking his tiny knuckles.

"Good. I must leave now. Farewell, my children." And so, Arceus disappeared in a flash.

**XxXx**

The WWE and their current allies were standing a long distance away from the radio tower that gave Evil Marc control over the citizens of Station Square. Wario had a look of determination on his ugly face, as he was ready to save the day.

"Fuck it all," Snake cursed while observing the army of goons that surrounded the tower. "Does there have to be so many damn enemies?!

"Because that wimp actually knows we are against him, and that we eliminated his first tower," Eggman responded.

"I know that!" the legendary pervert growled. "I am just sick of all this chaos and shit we have to deal with!"

"Now you know what it feels like to deal with my annoying brother on a daily ," Weegee commented.

"Thanks, bro!" Malleo said before making a bunch of hiccups for no reason.

"Come fourth, ye losers!" Evil Marc taunted from the top of the tower. "Try your best to beat thy maker!"

"Why the heck is he using that stupid old English?" Gay Piplup wondered.

"Because it's fancy!" Malleo answered.

"Must we go on with this nonsense?" Wario said seriously. "We have to save this town!"

"Is Wario sick?" Duck Hunt Dog brought up.

"No," the fat doofus stated. "I'm just getting serious."

**XxXx**

Up in space, the soul's of Papa Wario and his wife, Mama Wario, were staring down at the planet beneath them.

"It's time, my wife," Papa Wario said as his voice somehow echoed through space.

"I can't go through that time of the month anymore!" Mama Wario stated. "Ghosts don't go through that."

"No!" Papa Wario replied. "I mean, we must give our first child sweet sunglasses!" The fat ghost shot lightning bolts from his hands, which were heading towards Earth.

**XxXx**

*The lightning bolts from Papa Wario land on Wario's face, morphing into a pair of sunglasses as Goofy Goober Rock begins to play*

Wario: I'm a WAA Weirdo!

Waluigi, Falco, Crazy: Rock!

Wario: You're a WAA Weirdo!

Waluigi, Falco, Crazy: Rock!

Wario: We're all WAA Weirdos!

Waluigi, Falco, Crazy, Mermaid Man: Rock!

Wario: WAA WAA, weirdos, weirdos!"

Waluigi, Falco, Crazy, Malleo, Mermaid Man: Rock!

Wario: Put your memes away, well, all I gotta say when you tell me not to play, I say no way! (Wario crawls along a brick wall)

Waluigi, Falco, Crazy, Malleo, Tails, Mermaid Man: No way! (Warlord detonates a bomb, which destroys the wall)

Wario: No, no, freaking way! (Troll Face, Pedobear, Vegeta, and Gwonam emerge from the hole in the wall, and the scene changes to a street, with three stripers posing not far from Wario) I'm a moron, you say? When you say I'm a moron I say "Say it again!" And then I say "Thanks!"

Waluigi, Falco, Crazy, Duck Hunt, Malleo, Tails, Mermaid Man: Thanks!

Wario: Thank you very much! (Wario catches sight of the stripers before throwing up. The scene then changes to a nuclear power plant) So if you think would like to be like me, go ahead and try! The weirdo inside will set you free! Bythewaythisstoryisactuallymovingontotumblrain'tthatstinkinggreat! I'm a WAA Weirdo!

All members of the WWE: Rock!

Evil Marc: Fuck, I know where this is going!

Eggplant Wizard: And why should I care?

Evil Marc: Because I will fucking lose! Get him, slaves! Before he transforms into his next form! (All of Evil Marc's goons surround Wario before getting blasted away. Wario, now in a ridiculous wizard costume, flies upwards while playing a guitar. He does a few notes on it before firing a laser, striking a Skarmory's helmet, freeing the Pokémon)

Skarmory: I'm free! I'm free to fly high!

Evil Marc: WHAT THE GOD DAMN FUCK IS THIS FUCKING SHIT?! (Wario fires three more lasers, freeing a Goomba, a Psyduck, and a Inkling from the mind control)

Waluigi: Rock it, pal!

Evil Marc: Ekans, Eggplant Wizard! STOP THAT PUNK! (Wario fires two lasers at Ekans and Eggplant Wizard, breaking their helmets)

Ekans: You were ssssssaying, ssssssscrub? (Gwonam flies next to the duo on his glorious magic carpet and let's them on)

Eggplant Wizard: Adios, bane of my existence... for you! (The trio flies away, leaving a tomato-red clone all by himself)

Wario: Let's take it up a notch! (Wario spins around, firing lasers in random directions, all hitting slaves and setting them free)

All non-slave characters and Wario: ROCK! ROCK! ROCK! (More and more freed characters join in on the chant)

Evil Marc: THIS. CAN'T. BE. HAPPENING! I'm losing to a idiotic as fuck fatass! (Lasers hit Vector, Espio, Gay Piplup, and one of the nudists from the mall)

Vector: Yeah baby!

Espio: Wario is a true warrior, mah boi!

Gay Piplup: Spaghetti!

Nudist: Wooo! Let's dance!

Evil Marc: BLAST YOU TO HELL! Oh well, I still have my final weapon! (Everyone's favorite evil clone whips out a remote control from his left pocket, looking at a giant mech standing right behind the radio tower. Wario quickly fires a laser at the mech, completely destroying it) COME THE FUCK ON! THAT COST ME MY PENIS AND OVER 9000 DOLLARS!

Paul Blaurt: There's the punk who took over our city! Take down that tower, fellow freedom fighters! (Paul leads his army to the tower, all of them wrecking it in seconds. Evil Marc falls to the ground, landing in the middle of a group of civilians)

Evil Marc: Uhhhhh... I can explain.

Gwonam: It is written that Evil Marc...

CD-I Ganon: MUST DIE! (All of the civilians tackle the evil clone and begin tearing him apart)

Fat Pikachu: I'm going to hang your head over my fireplace!

Ekans: Sssssscrub! You shall feel my pain!

Morshu: Lamp oil, rope, bombs! All of them are going straight up your ass!

Evil Marc: FAAAAAAaaaaaaaaa! Ahhhhhhhh...

Diggersby: Start knocking them down, boys! (Everyone begins to push down the Evil Marc statues, one by one)

Everyone but Wario: Wario! Cha-cha-cha! Wario! Cha-cha-cha!

**XxXx**

*Goofy Goober Rock stops playing and is replaced by Iris' battle theme from Pokémon: Black and White 2*

"Looks like everything is back to normal!" Dedede claimed. The sky then began to turn back into its natural blue color, with a rainbow as well.

"I still can't believe it! Not one, but TWO clubs that actually do good!" the mayor of Station Square, Professor Oak, exclaimed. "Thank you, WAA Weirdos Emissary and Kirby Crew!"

"Waa. The pleasure is all ours, mayor!" Wario, who was back in his usual attire, stated.

"Speaking of pleasuring, Solid and Long Snake went of for "pleasure" back at our hideout," Weegee said with a disgusted look.

"Yuck! That guy is so perverted!" Gay Piplup winced.

"Waa, and we have to put up with it everyday," Waluigi said. "At least you don't have to deal with it on a day-to-day basis!"

"Hrrrmm, anyways, I cannot truly thank you for what you have done! I must ask that you come with me to town hall, where I will give you all medals!" Oak continued.

"No thanks, Oakster! I just want free pizza!" Wario thanked the mayor. "How about it, Vector?"

"You guys got free pizza before this!" Vector reminded him. "But, what the hay, free pizza for everyone who is a WAA Weirdos Emissary fan!" Everyone cheered at this.

"Come on, everyone!" Waluigi eagerly shouted. "To Pizza Hut!" Nearly everyone left the street, except for the Kirby Crew, Morshu's gang, Watharja, and Scratcher.

"Well, I guess I have to head back to the Battle Resort!" Scratcher stated before walking away.

"Where should we go, gang?" Kirby asked his team.

"Let's head to the mall and see what's going on there!" Clyde suggested.

"Clyde, we all know what happens to the mall!" Pac Man groaned.

"I dunno about you guys, but I'm heading off to find my girlfriend!" Dedede said while taking off towards the Smash Mansion.

"Maybe we should just stick with the emissary?" Meta Knight brought up.

"Nah, I think we should go do our own business. Though the idea of free pizza is so dang tempting..." Kirby stated.

"Well, I guess I'll have to get a job somewhere around this dump," Watharja whined.

"You could work for me, you know," Morshu replied.

"We'll see about that," the fusion stated. "See you guys, and dorky Mewtwo, later!"

"Hey!" Mewtwo shouted, although Watharja was already out of sight. "Gah..."

"Don't sweat over it, Mewtwo," Morshu assured his friend. "We have the Lancia's to punish, remember?" Gay Piplup sighed at the mention of that family, knowing that only meant one thing.

"But first, we have to head back home to hang my newest piece to my collection of enemies!" Fat Pikachu said. He was admiring Evil Marc's head, now stuck on a plaque, as if he was a deer or something.

"Don't fret, we have to head back home anyways," Morshu said. "We have to go get equipment for our assault on the Lancia's house of Link and anime."

**XxXx**

The two Master Hand's were at the Fountain of Dreams, still shaken up the earthquake that had happened there. They were surrounded by Nintendo characters of kinds, most of which were trying to get info from the twin right hands about what happened a few hours prior.

"Why was there an earthquake?"

"Why are there two of you, Master Hand?"

"Why do I feel like I'm about to release a load?"

"We have to get out of this mess, before thing's get worse!" CTH Master Hand told his counterpart.

"I know, but how?" WWE Master Hand questioned while on the verge of panic. "And why do people in this universe have the stupidest of questions?!" Just then, a loud blast was heard as dozens of characters were sent flying, leaving a wide path for the two hands. On the outside of the circle of Nintendo charcters sat a Landmaster, currently being piloted by Dry Bowser.

"This way, before they crowd around you again!" Dry Bowser shouted towards the two. Both hands made a dash for it, swiftly getting a long ways away from the herd of characters. Dry Bower followed them in his Landmaster, with the trio meeting up right in front of the Red Mountain, which was about a few miles from the Fountain of Dreams and the rest of Grape Gardens.

"Man, that was intense!" CTH Master Hand, clearly tired from the run, panted.

"I'm glad you two are safe!" Dry Bowser commented. "The paparazzi can be a really pain in the ass!"

"That's for sure," WWE Master Hand responded, curling up in a fist before shuddering.

"Say, Dry Bowser, do you have any idea on what happened to Station Square during our absence?" CTH Master Hand asked.

"Not really," the skeleton answered. "Why?"

"Well, my counterpart here mentioned earlier that he sensed something going on at our town, and we just wanted to make sure that nothing happened," CTH Master Hand replied. "By the way, what are you doing this far out into the countryside?"

"I just around the neighborhood when I saw you getting attacked by those assholes, simple as that," Dry Bowser said, scratching his boney head. "What are you doing here though, and with another one of you at the same time?"

"Long story short, I'm from another universe," WWE Master Hand said. "I'll explain the rest latter."

"OK..." Dry Bowser said. "Mind if I tag along on whatever quest you two are on?"

"I don't see why not!" WWE Master Hand replied.

"Wynaut!" Wynaut, who appeared out of nowhere, said randomly, before running away. The trio just stared at the blue Pokémon for a moment before continuing their conversation.

"All right, that was awkward..." Dry Bowser muttered.

"Meh, I deal with worse everyday of my life," WWE Master Hand responded.

"You and me both, brother from the same mother," CTH Master Hand agreed.

"By the way, I have a bit of a long story to explain as well..." Dry Bowser said.

**XxXx**

The skies above Melee City, AKA Fourside, were filled with raining clouds as people ran into the nearest buildings possible. Speaking of buildings, one in particular was usually empty, what with it being an abandoned hotel and all. However, on this day, it wasn't. One sole scientist had recently sneaked into the old hotel, deciding that it would make an ideal laboratory. Machines scattered across the top floor.

"So, it appears she is still alive," the scientist said, with the words echoing throughout the room. "Ooh, an echo! So evil! I knew this would be a good evil lair!"

"You know, you are just a shame to legit evil scientists everywhere," a nearby Magnezone commented.

"How dare you say that about your master?!" he shouted. "I am a true evil genius!"

"Yeah, says the guy who used his mother's basement as an evil lair for twelve years," Magnezone brought up.

"T-that was because I had no money since I bought all that evil machinery!" the scientist stuttered. "Not to mention that I also lost my job due to this shitty economy! No one can get a job these days!"

"Whatever," Magnezone replied. "You're still a terrible excuse for a villain."

"Not for long!" the scientist exclaimed. "With that blasted woman still alive, I can trick that Morshu fellow into helping me with my goals of getting Lana all to myself, before I conquer the world!"

"I don't know why you have that fetish for that weeaboo, and I'm sure I don't want to know," Magnezone muttered.

"Scoff all you want, you are still my minion!" the scientist responded. "Besides, weeaboo or not, she does have sexy curves!"

"If you like a butt load of fat," the Pokémon added.

"She also has a butt load of cash!" the scientist mentioned. Magnezone's eyes widened at this part. If the Pokémon had a mouth, he would be smiling right now.

"Really?" Magnezone inquired.

"Yes. Rumors have it that she has a massive loot of anime gunk stored at the Fourside Anime Bank, said loot is rumoured to add up to over one billion dollars! And I, the fabulous Colress, shall have that moolah if it's the last thing I do!" Colress began to laugh evilly for a moment before suddenly stopping. "Damn, laughing like a villain just isn't as good if you don't have thunder and lightning to go along with it!"

"I can help with that!" a Rotom squealed. Colress and Magnezone stared at the Motor Pokémon in horror, knowing what was going to happen next.

"No, stop!" Colress ordered. Sadly, Rotom disobeyed, firing a massive Thunder attack, which blasted the other two villains out of the building.

"And this is why I told you having that guy was a bad idea," Magnezone stated as Colress was just screaming in panic.

**XxXx**

"Lamp oil?" Morshu asked Mewtwo.

"Check," Mewtwo answered.

"Rope?"

"Check."

"Bombs?"

"Check."

"You want it? It's yours, my friend... as long as you have enough rupees!"

"Uhhh... why did you say that last part?"

"Sorry. I just had to say it. It's been too long, since I don't sell that stuff anymore. Gods, I miss that old shop back in Koridai..."

"Then why are you selling ice cream here, when you can go back home and live your dream?" Mewtwo inquired. Morshu gulped, as he still didn't want to tell his friend the truth of what happened to the original shop back home. That event still haunted him in his dreams, and they would stay there until he avenged Koridai.

"Well, uh, the economy got so crappy there that I couldn't afford the place anymore, and no other place throughout the planet would allow me to sell bombs... except for Detroit, but we all know how bad that place is," Morshu stuttered, hoping Mewtwo would believe his story. Mewtwo however didn't care, as at the mention of Detroit, he began to gag violently. Either way, Morshu still lucked out.

"Sweet Arceus, Detroit..." the psychic jerk winced while still shivering at the mention of that place. "I remember when I first went there in the second grade with Dark Pit and Shadow... crappiest experience of my life to this day. Especially because of those drunk clowns that were wandering the street with guns."

"Wait... drunk clowns with guns? Man, and here I thought Mama Luigi and Arwing incident was nuts..." Morshu said, clearly flabbergasted.

"Well, that's Detroit for you: nothing can go right there," Mewtwo responded. "It's the worst place on Earth for a reason."

"Hell, you got that right," the shopkeeper commented. "Ah well, we better get going. It's time to mess with bitches!"


	14. Ch 14: Non-Funky Future

**Chapter 14: Non-Funky Future**

The WAA Weirdos Emissary were back inside their Pizza Hut Hideout, celebrating their victories over Walutena and Evil Marc, as well as the newest addition to the team, Funky Kong, and the return of Falco and Crazy Hand. While everyone else was breaking it down on the newly polished dance floor, Falco and Crazy stood aside, thinking about the horrors that the future had in store.

"Waa! This is one heck of a party!" Waluigi told Wario, as both of them were at the punch table.

"Yeah, but something here is giving me bad vibes..." Wario muttered.

"Like what? Did you eat prunes again?" his lanky friend asked.

"I dunno, but it feels like someone around here knows something the rest of us don't."

"I've been getting that vibe as well. You do you think it is?"

"I'm not sure about you two, but it seems like Crazy and Falco over there aren't as giddy as you'd think they'd be," Duck Hunt Dog said as he approached the duo, before pointing to those on the back wall of the dance floor.

"Waa, you're right," Wario nodded. "What is up with them?"

"I think it's best to end this party and talk to them as a team, Wario," Mermaid Man suggested.

"WAA?! MERMAID MAN, HOW CAN YOU SUGGEST SUCH A THING?! WHAT DID I DO WRONG TO DESERVE SUCH A PUNISHMENT?!" Waluigi shouted.

"No pal, he's right," Wario replied before grabbing a microphone. "Everyone! This party is ending post haste!"

"What?!"

"Bullshit!"

"Boo! It's Boo the Bee! Get him away from me!"

"Quiet! We are having an emergency meeting! Meet me in the discussion room within five minutes! That's final!" While most of the gang groaned, they quickly obeyed.

**XxXx**

Morshu stood on the top of the tallest hill at the Seaside Hill Zone. Holding red roses in his hand, he walked slowly towards the edge of the hill, where a black stone, stuck in the ground, sat. Morshu bent down to read the words labeled across the rock.

Mariella Shumor

1940-2014

The very first to die during that horrid war. You died a death that even most villains would never deserve. We miss you.

Signed, Morshu, Azurill, Link, Zelda, King Harkinian, Gwonam.

We placed you where you wanted to be. Right on the highest hill of Seaside Hill, where you met the love of your life.

Morshu placed the roses in front of the grave, next to the nearly rotted batch that he had placed there just a year before, during her funeral. Sitting there, the salesman just continued to stare at the grave. That is, until a blue arm touched his backside. Turning around, Morshu saw something he thought he would never see.

An Azumarill. Most people wouldn't care for encountering a Pokémon like this, but Morshu was glad as possible.

"After a year of being separated... you found me... and evolved twice while we were apart..."

"You may not look like what you were when I first met you, back when I was ten. But, you still are the same little Azurill I love."

"I missed you, pal."

"Azumarill."

The two hugged each other tightly, both lightly sobbing in the process. The wind picked up as the two let go.

"Let's go. Let's go to my new home."

**XxXx**

"What's this about, Wario?" Weegee asked. The entire emissary was gathered around a large table, with Wario and Waluigi sitting together on one edge of it.

"It's about two members of our gang. They seem to know something we don't," Wario answered.

"Who? It's not me!" Malleo stated.

"I know it's not you, Malleo," the leader responded. "It's Falco and Crazy Hand who have secrets!" Everyone except for Eggman, Metal Sonic, Tails, and Mermaid Man gasped. They couldn't believe Wario would accuse two of his closest friends of something. Falco looked down at the table with sadness, while Crazy looked the other way.

"I guess it's time to fess up," Falco grunted. This was hard for him to say, not only because he himself didn't want to admit this fact, but because he was worried that everyone else wouldn't believe him.

"You're a woman?!" Malleo asked, being his typical idiot self.

"Malleo, can't you be serious for one moment?!" Everyone gasped again. Falco getting serious only made things even more suspicious. "This concerns the safety of not only this universe, but ours as well! Heck, all universes could be in peril for all we know!"

"Uhhh..." Snake stammered.

"OK guys, calm down," Wario commanded. "Falco, what do you and Crazy know?"

"Well... first, I should tell you that... Crazy had that sort of dream again, back on the Space Colony ARK. The same sort that saved our world during the attack of the Subspace Emissary."

"I don't follow," Weegee said.

"Crazy Hand had a dream before the Subspatial War that depicted many of the events that would happen during said war," Snake answered. "Crazy has been known to have these sort of dreams, usually before a time of crisis."

"It was the only thing that gave us a true chance in the war," Wario added. "We may have not known everything about what was going to happen, but we knew enough that mattered. Thus, Tabuu fell, never to be heard from again. Now, I must ask, what was in that dream?"

"Something... horrible. Nearly beyond imagination itself," Falco stated. "We didn't get much, but we did get enough for us to know that we may be doomed."

"Yes..." Crazy whispered. "It was... the end of, at least, this universe. Ours will most likely go through a similar fate."

"Don't leave us hanging like this, man!" Duck Hunt demanded. "We need this news, pronto!"

"First... there is some sort of monster whose soul lies somewhere within this world... the being known as Death Hand. We don't know much about this beast, but it appears that he is using the body of Master Hand as his new body. As such, it is confirmed that sometime within the near future, Master Hand will be killed. However, it seems that a cult is forming to revive him. I can't say much about this cult, other than the fact that this leader seems oddly familiar..."

"In what sort of way?" Mermaid Man pondered.

"I don't know, there is just something familiar about that character's aura... There were at least three other members, but I couldn't make them out. After that, Death Hand gets revived, after Master Hand's death, and unleashes his wrath upon the world..."

**XxXx**

"HAHAHAHA!" Death Hand laughed over the burning remains of Station Square. "Defeat me if you can, mere mortals! My power is triple that of even all of the clubs in the world combined!"

"Back off, you wanker!" Shulk roared. All members of the MMMB and CTH stood in the streets of the dying city, not ready to let the devil take over and kill anymore civilians. "This is the end of you!"

"Well put, Morono Boy!" Death Hand insulted. "This will be the end of you!"

"I'd like to see you try and kill all of us! Go on, try!" Sonic shouted.

"Please, I'd have a harder time trying to clean my ass than that stupid challenge!"

*Project Chaos' remix of Doomsday Zone from Sonic and Knuckles begins to play*

Sonic dashed for the floating figure, with the rest of the army right behind him. Death Hand lowered himself down to the ground, ready for any attack. Sonic quickly approached the giant hand, but the devilish hand disappeared before Sonic could do anything. Just a second later, Death Hand reappeared behind the hedgehog, merely flicking him with his index finger. This caused Sonic to go flying towards the sky, being engulfed in flames. The fire died in about five seconds, as the remains of Sonic fell to the ground. Everyone stared at the ashes of the hedgehog, before looking up at the killer.

"Please, someone had to punish him for his cockiness!" Death Hand cackled. "After all, you fools couldn't bother on fixing that one flaw of his. If you did, he would have lived. That means it's all your fault for his death! You should be ashamed of yourselves!"

"Don't try to pin this on us, bitch!" Marth yelled.

"Denying the truth? That deserves punishment as well!" the evil hand laughed before snapping his fingers. A second later, Marth blew up, scattering his blood and guts all over the street.

"MARTH!" Shulk cried out. "That's it, you bloody bastard! I think it's time for your punishment!"

"Bring it, fools!" Death Hand taunted. "Know this: you should be honored. Honored that I will murder you all!"

"I'd feel honored if I was a damn fool!" Wolf, who had joined the battle with Lucina, shouted. Wolf swiftly ran towards the hand, only to get grabbed by his opponent and get squeezed slowly and painfully in the process. While Death Hand preformed this maneuver, Lucina began to get erased from existence, due to Marth's death. Shulk and Donkey Kong tried to free Wolf from the satin of a hand, but they couldn't do anything. Once Wolf was dead, Death Hand shook the two off of him, sending them into two different buildings, which collapsed on them. Riki tried to freeze the satin, but the attack was merely shaken off, before the devil summoned knives, which all stabbed Riki at once. The MMMB Kirby whipped out the Ultra Sword before slashing his foe at least a hundred times. Despite his efforts, Death Hand felt nothing, and poked the puffball, who popped a second later.

"Im... impossible..." was all that Palutena could say as Death Hand continued to kill her allies. Ness. Dunban. Jigglypuff. Nearly everyone one the side of justice quickly died, leaving the goddess with Toadette and Mario.

"That was fun!" Death Hand taunted. "Admittedly, easier than doing essentially anything, but fun! Now, it's just time to finish you punks off!"

"That's it! I'm teleporting us out of here!" Palutena stated as she and her three remaining allies were beginning to emit a green light. Before they could get away, the devil grabbed Toadette and Mario, as Palutena was whisked away.

"No!" Mario shouted in dismay.

"Let's see, what shall I do with you two... oh yes, how about, I hold you captive in this city until it blows up?!"

**XxXx**

"After that, Palutena will head back to the remains of Station Square, where she dies during her solo battle with that... thing."

"... Even I'm terrified now," Weegee said.

"... What, uhhh, happens to us, Crazy?" Wario stuttered.

"I do not know much, but I do know that during the Death Hand's assault on this city, we will be hiding out in Adder's Lair, with most of the Hot Topic Krew, the Kirby Crew, and this League of Super Evil I have heard about, as well as a bunch of Station Square's inhabitants," Crazy stated.

"... Man, and to think I figured coming here would be pointless," Snake said. "To think we actually have to save this world!"

"WHAT DO WE DO?! THIS WORLD IS DOOMED!" Malleo panicked.

"Calm down!" Wario ordered. "We didn't make it this far because of panicking, and it certainly won't get us any farther!"

"Wario's right!" Falco added. "Thankfully, I have an idea!"

"What is that?" Waluigi questioned.

"As crazy as it is... we need to do something desperate... we need to whip out the Dragon types to fight the Dragon types... in order to fight an edgy opponent, we need edgy allies... the Hot Topic Krew is our only hope."

"I hate to admit it, but... he's right," Wario sighed in defeat, unable to argue. "We need to make an alliance with those Hot Topic morons."

"We don't know where they are located though!" Metal Sonic brought up. "We need to do that first!"

"Correct," Waluigi agreed. "What do you say we do about that, Wario?"

"Snake, Duck Hunt, I must ask you two to find as much info as you can on their current location," Wario said sternly. "Stay as low profile as possible, and do not confront them by yourselves, no matter the situation."

"Rodger that!" Duck Hunt Dog complied before both of them left the room.

"Everyone else, I must ask that you try to stay calm, and make sure you do not spread this news to anyone untrustworthy," Wario continued. "Only the Pizza Hut workers and Oak should know about this right now."

"Understood," Dr. Eggman said. "As much as I hate those edgy punks, I will follow these orders. After all, once this nonsense with Death Hand is over, we can go back to beating down those fools, right?"

"Of course," the yellow leader answered. "But only once we dispose of the bigger threat. Everyone is dismissed. All but Wario, Waluigi, and Weegee left the room, all heading out into the Pizza Hut above them.

"So, do we team up with the Cute Toot House or no?" Weegee questioned.

"No," Wario said. "Their club is supposed to be falling apart, judging from the events that occurred at the mall. They'd be little help to us right now. Besides... I honestly don't trust them..."

**XxXx**

"Intriguing. So, Maria was the original owner of the essence of chaos? But when the G.U.N troops invaded here, Maria inserted the essence into Shadow, who is completely oblivious to the fact that it lurks inside his blood?"

The creature that was in the Seaside Hill Zone during the the bloody storm was looking through some old and hardly working videos on the Space Colony ARK, trying to get as much information on the obscure but deadly" essence of chaos", by far the most dangerous of all essences in this universe. If used properly, this energy would be double that of the essences of space, nature, time, and light combined.

"It appears that I have to kill that blasted hedgehog to obtain this power... so I get to kill two mockingbirds with one stone, I suppose. I've always hated the edgy bitch."

"So, how are we going to divide this essence amongst the two of us, hm?"

The creature stared its cell phone, as it was on a call with another villain, who was this diabolical monster's ally.

"As long as you have those splicers, we should be able to divide it easily. Now, you still have them, correct?"

"Indeed. I also have the Frigate in my possession still as well. With both of these things, it should be easy to eliminate that hedgehog."

"Have you heard any word from Cyrus?"

"Yes, and it seems that he is willing to strike a deal with us. However, I do suggest that we go together, in case this is a trap of some sort."

"Agreed. I will be back to Earth by tomorrow. I wish to obtain more information on this power, so that we may be able to fully utilize it once we get our hands on it."

"Understood. See you then, partner."

"Farewell, Zinzolin."

The creature quickly hung up before letting out a light chuckle. It looked back at the video, seeing Maria get shot by the G.U.N.

"And soon... Zinzolin will meet that fate as well. That poor soul. He fails to realize that he's just a pawn for the real villain. We're far from equal, and we shall never be equal. I am above all other forms of life. I am above the universe itself. I may lack power now, but I will soon have more than enough to quench my thirst for power... and revenge. With the essence of chaos, I shall have a god underneath my control. No one shall be able to stop me."

The monster let out another light chuckle, now staring down at the planet below.

"I do wonder how those blasted fools are doing right now, thinking they had rid the planet of me for good. Probably something stupid, while I actually make my life count. Although, I do suppose I can have a little fun while doing my work..."

The villain began to mess around with the controls, eager to cause mayhem. After pressing a big, black button, the ARK fired a giant missile right down towards Earth.

**XxXx**

It was your average day at the Skyarrow Bridge in Unova. Blue skies, few clouds, and... no Pokémon flying around? Something didn't seem right, but the humans failed to realize it.

Above, the missile was approaching.

No one knew why the Pokémon stayed away from the bridge. Nothing seemed out of place. Even during some of the deadliest of storms, some Pokémon were zooming over the bridge. No one truly cared about this fact, however.

Above, the missile was closer.

Soon, a young child about the age of four noticed something in the skies. Since he couldn't talk, his mother failed to understand anything he was saying. No one else noticed the thing... until it was too late.

The missile hit.

The entire bridge sunk into the ocean within seconds. Everyone on the bridge during the incident died either from drowning or from the explosion. Bodies floated across the water, most of which were burnt completely. A fire began to spread into Castelia City, but no one could stop it.

Not a single soul.

The entire city was no more within a few short hours. While many did escape, more than seventy-five percent of the population was wiped out that day. All that remained of Castelia was the sewers.

All because of one heartless monster.

A monster that would not give up.

A monster that would spread even more pain across the world.

The world was left stumped that day. No one had any idea on where that missile came from, or why it hit the Skyarrow Bridge. Many speculated that it was the force of something beyond their home planet, some sort of alien species. Others predicted that Judgment Day itself was nearing. Regardless, the people of the world would never know the answer until a few weeks later.


	15. Ch 15: Clones, Dimwits, and Morshu

**Chapter 15: Clones, Dimwits, and Morshu**

The evening skies of Station Square were a beautiful mix of red and orange, as they typically were. Paratroopas and Starly were flying through the clouds, barely in sight to those on the ground. Snake and Duck Hunt Dog were still out, looking for info on where the Hot Topic Krew was currently located.

"Seems like no one has a damn clue on where they went," Snake sighed. He was on the verge of giving up, sweat dripping down his manly face.

"Well, we can't give up," Duck Hunt reminded his pal. "Remember what will happen if the future?"

"Yeah, but I really need a rest," Snake protested. That's when Duck Hunt's cell phone began to ring loudly, playing the DK Rap.

"What is it, Falco?" Duck Hunt Dog asked as he answered his phone.

"Personally, I prefer the air over a rest!" Falco screeched on the other end.

"Dang it all Falco, did you seriously just call me to say that?! And what happened to being serious?!"

"Hey, being to serious means that you will get too negative. soon enough. Lighten up a bit, pup," Falco said right before hanging up.

"Blasted bird... that cost me precious minutes on my phone... that I can't add more minutes on!"

"Calm down. That barely took a minute, if even that long," the soldier said. "Besides, we have more important things to worry about than that thing."

"You're right, sorry Snake," the young dog replied.

"KEEEEEEYYYYYYYYYYIIIIIIIEEEEEEEEOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHFISHSTICKSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!" some random voice shouted loud enough for the entire town to hear.

"Woah... what was that about?" Snake wondered, actually somewhat scared.

"We better check it out. Sounds like it came from the middle of town," Duck Hunt suggested. Despite not wanting to, Snake reluctantly agreed to the plan.

**XxXx**

"I can't believe Palutena actually managed to get us a home here in Mauville Hills!" Toadette squealed to Jigglypuff, both of whom were standing outside the Mauville Pokémon Center.

"Not sure why she would buy a place so far away from Station Square though..." Jigglypuff responded. "I mean, we may not be able to do much right now, but if something happens to that place? Like that disaster of Castelia City? Or a repeat of that whole Marctopolis episode?"

"True, but I think it's best for all of us to just calm down for a bit before we get back into action," Toadette argued. " I just wish are group didn't have to separate like that... I miss Lucario and Silver already..."

"Hey, guys," Mario said from a ways away. "Palutena wants us to head back to the apartment. She wants to start a meeting."

"Like what?" the Balloon Pokémon asked while her and Toadette approached him.

"Well, trying to revive our team, a new team name, new members, and... something even I wasn't told about. The last thing must be something big."

"Bigger than me?!" Ridley screeched as he landed right in the middle of the square, scaring everyone else away.

"Shut it, purple pest!" Mario shouted.

"Aww... no one cares for Ridley..." With that, Ridley flew away while crying... while Sakurai was drinking the space dragon's tears.

"Well, now that we got that... thing done and over with, I suppose we should head to our base?"

**XxXx**

"KKKKOOOOOOOOOKIEEEEEEFISHSTICKOFDDDOOOOOOOOOMMMMMMM! EATLIOOOOOOOOONDICK! WWWWWWWRRRRRROOOOOOOAAAAAARRRRR PEEKO!"

"What the hell is this copycat even saying?!"

"What do you make of the situation, Duck Hunt?" Snake questioned his friend as they were watching a confrontation between Chrom and a very strange clone of him.

"Seems like either that Evil Marc guy has made a clone of Chrom or something stupid like that," the ally answered, just as confused as the soldier. "Got any ideas on what to do about this?"

"Only thing I can say is that we kidnap both of these weirdos and take them back to the hideout to experiment on them," Snake suggested.

"Are you crazy?! We could be caught doing something like that, and the town might just change their minds on our entire crew!"

"ILIKEGARDEVVVVVVVVVVOIRHENTTTTAIIIII! LET'SEAAAAAATTNUUUUUUUCLEARPICKLLLLLLEEESSSS!"

"Well, I'm pretty sure nobody wants a wacko like that running around, now do they?" Snake rhetorically asked, grin on his face.

"That I'm sure about as well, but we can't kidnap the normal Chrom as well! Do you think the people will be OK with that?!"

"You better thank the gods that nobody else is here, or else this would be extremely embarrassing! Course, us being here, ALONE, could lead us to getting, KIDNAPPED...

"OK, now he's just asking to get taken away," Duck Hunt groaned.

"So we go with my plan?" the pervert asked.

"Does a Snake go "I wanna suck on tits"?"

"Haha, good impersonation. I could teach you how to become a pervert like me, though."

"If I wanted to get flamed by women, I would love that."

**XxXx**

"Can we start this meeting now? I'm tired of waiting," Fox groaned, having to deal with Ness' hiccupping since 3:28 AM that morning.

"Yes... everyone, I have called this meeting between us... because some I have some big news to share," Palutena stated.

"What about trying to revive our group? What happened to that part?" Mario asked as everyone finally took their seats.

"Don't worry Mario, we'll get to that... but first, some news I have just obtained from Zelda just a few moments after I had released the news about the meeting," Palutena replied. "Mind doing the honors, Zelda?"

"Of course," Zelda said. "Now, as you know, there have been rumors about a club, known to us as the WAA Weirdos Emissary, has recently appeared, saving Station Square from this Evil Marc fellow we have heard about."

"Tell us something we don't know!" Fox shouted.

"Yes, well, it appears... that they treat us as an enemy." Everyone began to mutter about this new info, wondering why exactly the emissary had a bone to pick with the Cute Toot House.

"What did we do to them?"

"I'm confused..."

"Why isn't Palutena farting?"

"Quiet, please!" the goddess ordered. The room quickly went quiet as Palutena nodded towards Zelda as a gesture to continue.

"Anyways, I'm not too sure why they have the apparent need to fight against us. However, fighting them is not the best option either. Right Palutena?

"Yes. I highly recommend that we try to ask them why we are a threat to them and try to solve things peacefully," the leader stated. "I truly don't think that this crew is bad, and there is just some sort of misunderstanding here. After all, they are against the Hot Topic Krew as well."

"I suppose that makes sense... but why should we matter to them regardless? This isn't their universe," Ness questioned.

"I'm not sure of that myself, honestly," Palutena said sheepishly. "Now, onto other business..."

**XxXx**

"Damn it... and here I thought those pooting parasites would never notice the antenna on Sonic Robo... and then the fact that Sonic somehow escaped, only to disappear again... and those fucking rumors that I left the krew still exist! Man, my life has been shit lately!" Shadow yelled from inside the Temple of Souls.

"Shut the hell up! You are really getting loud!" Robin screamed at the hedgehog.

"At least I don't keep people up at night by tweeting like I'm sort of retarded bird!" Shadow spat.

"How did you know about that?!" Robin asked with loads of suspicion. "I know that you like to stay up late, but by the time I start tweeting, you are usually asleep!"

"Y-you know all edgy kids stay up late! It's fucking edgy to do shit like that!" Shadow claimed. This was far from true however, as Shadow had a different reason to stay up late. It involved Shrek, condoms, Gay Luigi, and a bunch of other crap. Let's just say that the whole incident was complete chaos.

"Why in the hell are you two not packing?!" Dark Pit yelled from downstairs. "We have that trip to Fourside tomorrow, and we can't waste time arguing about stupid crap!"

"The boss is right," Robin sighed. "Let's pack the things we need, and argue about this later."

"Agreed," Shadow said.

**XxXx**

"So, you were once a Pokémon Trainer back in Koridai, your starter was an Azurill, shit happened, you were afraid to tell your other Pokémon about Azurill's disappearance, and now your starter finds you after evolving twice?" Mewtwo asked Morshu as the usual quartet walked alongside the beach of Seaside Hill, accompanied by Azumarill.

"Yes, basically," Morshu answered.

"Why don't you catch Mewtwo then? After all, he'd sure add to your Pokedex!" Gay Piplup jokingly said.

"Not funny," Mewtwo responded, slightly gagging afterwards. "So, why didn't you tell us this earlier?"

"Because I was still to busy laughing at Waluigi's misfortune. After getting a massive load dropped on him, Mr. Krabs demolishing his stand just took all of my money and thoughts at that moment."

"Figures," Fat Pikachu commented as he took a bite of a Krabby Patty. "Speaking of crabs, has anyone else noticed that the Krabby around this place are getting violent ever since that restaurant has been placed here?"

"Hey, that yellow punk's eating a Krabby Patty!" a Kinger shouted from the top of a palm tree. "Get him!"

"... Well crud, this isn't good..." Fat Pikachu whimpered as a herd of Krabby popped out of the ground, surrounding the fat rodent as fast as possible.

"Quick, safe our pal!" Morshu told Gay Piplup, Mewtwo, and Azumarill while the Krabby ran off with their friend. "I have a very important text to read before I can join you guys!"

"What the hell, Morshu?!" Mewtwo scolded the shopkeeper. "Can't that text wait?!"

"Not now, edgehead!" Gay Piplup said while grabbing Mewtwo's left arm. "Just do what he says!"

"Whatever," the edgy Pokémon groaned as the trio ran after the Krabby army. Morshu took a quick glance at his cell phone, reading the text out loud.

Dear Morshu,

It has been some time since high school back in Koridai, hasn't it? Those were the best day of my life. But that's aside from the point. I heard about what happened to your home country, and I have some major news to tell you.

It appears that the mad woman who caused that horrid war and killed your mother is, in fact, alive. She has been hiding out here in Fourside since her "death", waiting for her chance to return. It seems she has gotten much stronger, possibly enough to even ruin CD-I Hyrule this time.

I am more than willing to help you defeat her before she can do any damage. However, I am stuck here in Fourside, so I need you to come here with any allies you currently have and meeting me in the abandoned building, across the street from the Burger King.

Signed, Colress

PS, I'm not even sure if it's possible for texts to get this long in real life. But since this fanfic lacks logic, who cares, right?

Morshu was flabbergasted, to say the least. Besides the fact that he finally got word from one of his closest friends back during high school, but the fact that Cia, the bitch that ruined Morshu's life, was still alive really blew his mind.

Of course, the instant he took in all the info this text gave him, his blood was boiling.

"That bitch is still out there?!" Morshu yelled. "That's it! I'm going to Fourside and end that bitch once and for all! For Koridai!"

"What's all the yelling about?" Watharja yawned as it poked its head out of the nearby bushes. "And did I hear something about Fourside?"

"Oh, it's you!" Morshu sighed in relief, expecting it to be Mewtwo and the rest of his gang. "Did you find a job yet?"

"No, but I plan on heading to head to Fourside to find a job," Watharja groaned, getting up rather slowly in the meantime. "That's why I wondered if someone mentioned that city.

"Yeah, I'm heading there to settle my revenge. I guess we might as well go together then, eh?"

"Might as well," the Waluigi fusion said.

"Mmm... I can't just leave my stand though..." Morshu muttered. "I guess I'll just have to have Gay Piplup stay here and watch over things here."

**XxXx**

"Step one of my plan, complete," Colress grinned. "Morshu just replied to my text, saying he's bringing his group of friends along with him."

"As much as I want that money, do you have to use one of your greatest friends to your selfish ends?" Magnezone questioned. "I mean, he may be able to avenge his country once and for all, but you even said earlier, and I quote "Even if he fails to get rid of that pathetic woman, as long as I get my money, I'll be happy forever!" How can you look in the mirror?"

"Please, you will never understand what it is like to be a true villain," Colress replied. "Even villains have to use their old buds as a means to get their way."

"... I see..." Magnezone quietly replied before leaving the room. After passing Rotom in the halls, he entered a small room. His room, which just so happened to have a diary in it. After sighing, he read it out to himself.

Dear Magnezone,

I know you can't stand Colress anymore. I couldn't either. I never really went missing. I ran away, hoping to find a new owner, someone like Colress back when he was a kid. By the time you have read this, I likely have found someone. Do consider leaving him. You know you want to.

Signed, Metagross.

"Should... or should I not leave... I guess that is the true question," Magnezone said. "I hate the new Colress, but the old one gave me so many great memories..."

**XxXx**

"So, that explains why you brought us these to Chroms," Wario said to Duck Hunt Dog, both of which were inside the main room of the Pizza Hut Hideout, with Waluigi and Mermaid Man in there as well. "I just hope Eggman can explain to us why there are two of that blue hair Ike clone to begin with."

"I surely can," Eggman proudly said, entering the room. "It appears that when fishsticks were eliminated from existence, Chrom split into two similar looking characters, but with entirely new personalities. The calm Chrom is the original..."

"While the wacko is the clone, right?" Waluigi finished.

"Precisely," Eggman said.

"OK, so what exactly do we do with that insane Chrom, then?" Duck Hunt asked the doctor.

"... Well, first, we have to relocate him."

"Let me guess, he escaped," Wario guessed.

"Yes, but I have already notified the police," the fat scientist stated. "We'll just leave that thing to them while we hunt for the Hot Topic Krew."

"I like the sounds of that," Waluigi said.

"Say, where's the rest of the gang, anyways?" Duck Hunt Dog asked, slightly concerned. "I know Snake is still in the bathroom, but what about everyone else?"

"Funky called me, saying he is coming back as we speak," Wario said. "Weegee's upstairs, eating pizza with Tails."

"And I'm sliding around on the floor!" Malleo shouted happily, sliding all over the place.

"WITH YOUR BUTT!" Eggman shouted. "You're leaving germs all over the place, and I'm on cleaning duty! I'm going to get you, disgusting pest!"

"Oi, this will end horribly," Mermaid Man grunted as Malleo was chased out of the room by everyone's favorite neat freak, Eggman.

"No point in crying over it though, since there's nothing we can do without making the situation worse," Duck Hunt Dog responded. "When Malleo's involved, there's nothing you can do."

"Took the words right out of my mouth," Weegee said as he came down the stairs, a large box of pizza in hand. "Speaking of mouths, you can fill yours with this."

"Oh boy, lotsa pizza!" Wario and Waluigi shouted.

"No, lotsa spaghetti!" Gay Luigi shouted as he burst into the hideout.

BATTLE START!

*Mario and Luigi: Superstar Saga Boss theme begins to play*

Wario: Wait, a Mario and Luigi style battle with Gay Luigi? Must be a filler scene.

Waluigi: If it's not a filler scene, I'll eat Weegee.

Wario: Do you realize how disgusting that would be?

Waluigi: Fair point. Now, enough stupid RPG dialogue, and let's have a battle!

Starlow: Hey! Listen! Do you need to know how to attack the opponent?

Wario: No.

Starlow: OK, how about dodging their attcks?

Waluigi: No, we're fine.

Starlow: How about healing?

Wario: No!

Starlow: Maybe some help with running away?

Waluigi: Will you please just get away?!

Starlow: Preforming Bro attacks? Moving through the overworld? Talking to NPCs? Attacking your opponent? Dodging enemy attacks? Healing yourselves? Saving your game? Eating? Breathing? Sleeping? Existing? I can help you with anything! Blah blah blah...

Wario: Stop this madness!

King Leonidas: Madness? THIS. IS. SPARTA!

Waluigi: I'll kindnap over 9000 children before I start listening to this Navi clone's gibberish!

Off Button: Need help getting rid off Starlow?

Wario: No, now go away!

Gay Luigi: Maybe this battle was a dumb idea...

Weegee: You think?

Duck Hunt Dog: How much longer do we have to deal with this terrible dialogue that rivals that of Pokémon: Snakewood's?

Weegee: Have you even bothered to play through Snakewood? That dialogue was way worse than this.

Duck Hunt Dog: Oh yeah, the dialogue was worse there. It has been a while since I last played that hack.

Wario: Talking about Snakewood reminds me of all the horrid Fakemon in that game. Dragoone is literally just a Rayquaza recolor.

Waluigi: Original the character, do not steal.

Weegee: Don't forget Gigawolf, AKA Zoroark on all fours!

"... That's it, enough RPG dialogue," LucarioFan3 said as the world was finally rid of that horrible nonsense.


	16. Ch 16: Morshu's Revenge

**Chapter 16: Morshu's Revenge**

"Now, you guys remember the plan, right?" Morshu asked Mewtwo, Fat Pikachu, and Azumarill, all four of them being at the back entrance of the Fourside hospital.

"How could I forget?" Mewtwo told his friend. "After all, this is easily the best plan of getting revenge on that stupid family yet!"

"I'm not lazy enough to forget," Fat Pikachu muttered.

"Azu!" Azumarill squeaked.

"Good," Morshu commented all while pulling out an Ultra Ball. "Now then, I suppose it's time to reintroduce Weezing to the world." In the blink of an eye, a bright light enveloped the area, disappearing just as fast. As soon as it was gone, a Weezing floated over Morshu's head.

"Weez?" the Pokémon said, taking in the environment around him. After scanning the area around him, he looked down to see his Trainer, sitting right below him.

"Long time no see, Weezing," the shopkeeper greeted.

"Weezing weez!" Weezing coughed in delight.

"I haen't seen you this happy since I ran over that punk who nearly killed you," Morshu chuckled. "Nice to see you again."

"OK, tender moment over," Mewtwo said. "Let's go get our revenge!"

"Right," Morshu replied. "Now, Weezing, I need you to head inside and..."

**XxXx**

"How's Robin doing?" Dark Pit asked Lucas, who had just came back from Cia's room within the hospital.

"Still happy as hell, but who can blame him?" Lucas reported. "After all, after thinking you lost your lover, what more could you ask for than to see them again?"

"Good point," Dark Pit said before the sound of shattering glass and screaming was heard just down the hall.

"What the hell was that?!" Shadow, who had been sleeping on the floor for the past three hours, asked with quiet a bit of anger in his voice.

"Sounded like it came from Cia's room!" Lucas shouted.

"Then let's roll!" Dark Pit ordered.

**XxXx**

Morshu was driving along the abandoned road that lead to a vacant hotel just on the edge of town, with Azumarill in the front seat of the car, leaving Mewtwo and Fat Pikachu stuck with riding in the back. Banging could be heard from the trunk, which was caused by Cia squirming around in there.

"That was easier than taking candy from a baby, which is fine by me," Mewtwo chuckled. "Not like I enjoy candy..."

"So, what does that Colress guy want next, Morshu?" Fat Pikachu asked. The salesman looked at his phone, noticing that he had a text.

"Dear Morshu,

Congrates on kidnapping Cia so easily. Of course, we still need to talk about the rest of our deal. Head up to the top floor of the vacant hotel as soon as you arrive.

Signed, Colress"

"We're to meet my bud on the top floor of the mansion once we get there."

"I still don't totally trust this guy, Morshu," the psychic Pokémon stated. "I mean, he does seem really creepy, even for me."

"Meh, everyone says that until they get to know him better," Morshu assured Mewtwo.

**XxXx**

"WHY DOES THIS KEEP HAPPENING TO ME?!" Robin cried. Everything in the room now smelled like a horrid combo of sludge, death, and lamp oil. Baby Marc, Morgan, and Ravio, were crying to death, mostly because their father was as well. Lucina kept trying to calm the babies down, but nothing worked.

"If I got here earlier, I would have caught the perpetrator red handed... regardless if they actually have red hands or not!" Greninja claimed. "This is why Shadow should have been the one to go get some Capri Sun!"

"Shut it, wannabe ninja!" Shadow shouted. "We have better things to worry about right now!"

"Shadow's right," Dark Pit said. "We need to find clues on who did this!"

"And I just think I found one!" Lucas said. "They apparently were stupid enough to leave us a note!"

"Can I have a look?" Dark Pit questioned. Lucas quickly handed him the note, which had a small coffee stain on it.

"Dear pesky edgeheads,

My minions and I have taken over a random hotel on the outskirts of town! The bitch known as Cia is now a permanent guest at said hotel. I dare you to find her if you can!

Signed, why should you know who signed this? Mind your own business!"

"Yeah... I think they left it here because of how terrible it is," Dark Pit sighed, passing the note to Robin.

"We gotta find Cia!" Wolf said.

"And you gotta help us!" Luigi added while pointing towards the "screen".

"Uhhhh... what?" Greninja grunted while everyone else just stood there, staring at Luigi.

"What? Can't a guy make a reference every once in a while?" Luigi inquired everyone.

"No," Fat Mario answered as he poked his head through the window.

"Who the hell are you?!" Dark Pit asked edgiliy.

"What's it to ya?" Fat Mario asked back as he threw a book right into Mr. Game and Watch. "If you need instructions on how to get through the hotel, check out the enclosed instruction book!"

"You mean this piece of shit you just threw at the edgiest man alive?!" Robin asked, picking up the book.

"No duh, dumbass!" the very fat plumber yelled. "Did you think it was going to be this condom, which I would wear as I pounded you?!"

"Ha! Gay!" Gay Luigi laughed as he popped through the hole in the window.

"Shut up, hypocrite!" Fat Mario yelled before smacking his brother, which caused said green plumber to fall to the ground.

"Well, enough of this shit!" Dark Pit said. "Everyone but Lucina is to come with me and rescue Cia! Now, let's march!"

"Uh oh!" Fat Mario gasped as the HTK ran towards the window. Before they knew it, all of them were falling towards the ground. Somehow, despite all of them falling on each other, they all made it down safely.

"That went better than expected," Greninja commented before the group got crushed by a Thwomp that had Gay Luigi on top of it.

"Go Weegee! Go Weegee!" Gay Luigi sang in happiness.

"Did somebody say Weegee?" a voice from above asked. Gay Luigi looked up, but was nearly immediately crushed by a giant Weegee clone.

"It's been one of those days," Fat Mario grunted.

**XxXx**

"So, Colress wants us to wait here until the Hot Topic Krew gets here?" Mewtwo asked. He and Morshu were looking out of the highest balcony of the abandoned hotel, looking over the forest that sprawled behind the building.

"Yeah, because he wants those brats to get humiliated," Morshu said. "Not like I can't blame him or anything."

"You got that right," Mewtwo responded. "Those bitches deserve to be punished."

"I know how to punish them!" Rotom shouted from the room that led to the balcony. "I will give them a blood bath... in their own freaking blood!"

"Sweet Arceus, that truly takes edgy up to eleven," Morshu replied, groaning afterwards.

"Meh, I think it sounds awesome, seeing those asses getting drowned in their damn blood," the edgy psychic Pokémon said.

"Morshu, I have big news!" Fat Pikachu screamed as he opened the door. "The Hot Topic Krew is here! We need to do something!"

"Why bother?" Morshu shrugged. "After all, the odds of those punks actually getting through this house of horrors is so fucking low, considering how fucked up the lower floors are."

**XxXx**

"Uhhh... how exactly do we get through this hellhole?" Greninja questioned Dark Pit. After doing a quick survey of the area, the fallen angel sighed, coming up with no answer and figured that the only hope would be to read the enclosed instruction book. Groaning, Dark Pit pulled the book out and opened it up, conveniently opening up to the page that explained how to get to the next floor.

"This shitty book says we have to close all of the doors to move onto the next floor. Not sure how that fucking works," the angel cursed.

"Well, in that case, time to get to work," Lucas said. Everyone walked away from the group, each heading to an open door.

"I fucking hate Hotel Mario," Shadow groaned as he shut a door tight. However, just as he began to walk away, the door swung right back open, with the Trololo song being sung by Eduard Khil himself. Shadow, in an a minor fit of jealousy and anger, tried to shut the door again, only for it to stay completely still.

"Beep beep boop," Mr. Game and Watch muttered to himself before he made it the front of a door. As soon as he stepped in front of it however, a laser beam shot right through the door, sending the 2D edgehead flying. Vegeta swiftly stepped out the door, taking off his scouter while doing so.

"It's OVER 9000!" the Saiyan shouted before flying around the room. Robin had to duck, or else the flying idiot would have knocked the tactician over.

"The hell was that?!" the tactician shouted.

"It's a football, Robin!" Mama Luigi wheezed. The usually happy meme then proceeded to punch Robin right in the nuts, laughing at his misery.

"This place is mad!" Greninja screamed as he shut another door shut.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!111!" Darth Vader screamed, cried, laughed, sighed, whined, grunted, sang, wheezed, burped, grinned, and all that crap that somehow makes sense, upset that Greninja shut the door.

"My lord, whoever thought that this would be good torture... was sadly right," Lucas moaned before closing a door. "Man, I'm surprised that nothing was inside that one..."

"Now you've jinxed yourself, fool!" a voice that came from behind the door roared. Lucas, being the curious brat he was, reopened the door, unleashing a hoard of Nyan Cats out.

"I wonder... why is this door is shut?" Wolf asked himself. Just a foot away from him, stood a door that had been shut the entire time. Curiosity getting the best of him, he opened it, allowing a bipedal Mudkip with a top hat and a cane come dancing out, as well as a herd of regular Mudkip following. After a few failed attempts at closing the doors, the Hot Topic Krew was beginning to succeed. At this point, nearly door had somehow been shut by the crew, despite the whole hallway being filled to the brim with memes of all sorts.

"I hope that's all..." Dark Pit whined.

"Let's go check!" Wolf suggested as he dragged the angel over to the stairway, with the rest of the crew right behind them.

"Hold it!" the ever glorious Mario Head shouted while blocking the crew's path. "I'm afraid that not all doors are closed."

"What?!" Lucas shouted. "We closed all of them!"

"Not... this one..." Shadow groaned, lying on the ground in defeat. Eduard kept singing his special song, laughing at the hedgehog's misery.

**XxXx**

"Gee, it sure is boring around here!" Morshu quoted.

"You said it. I just want to rip off those bastards dicks!" Mewtwo complained.

"Wopopopo! The Hot Topic Krew is on this floor!" Rotom shouted, bursting into the room like the complete maniac he was.

"What?! They actually made it up here?!" Morshu inquired in shock.

"Looks like my prayers have been answered!" Mewtwo said with the evilest grin possible on his edgy face.

"Hold it, Mewtwo!" Morshu replied. "I need you to hide in the other room!"

"What the hell?! Why?!" the edgy Pokémon questioned.

"Because... I need to teach those fools a lesson, alone. You go and plant the device onto Cia."

"Gah... fine, but next time, I want in too!" With that, Mewtwo and Rotom went into another room.

"Bring it on, Hot Topic Krew..." Morshu whispered. "Show me your power..."

"We're here to save you, Cia!" Dark Pit shouted from behind the door. Said door was banged against for a few times before it finally opened. The crew ran in, shocked to find our favorite shopkeep instead of Cia.

"Wait... isn't that the troll who used to sell ice cream at the old mall?" Robin asked Shadow.

"You can bet your ass he is," Ow the edge answered. "But what the hell is he doing here?"

"What? Is it not obvious?" Morshu chuckled in a rather evil manner. "I guess some silly little ice cream seller can't be a "bad" guy, can he?"

"Wait, you are responsible for this?!" Lucas wondered.

"Took you long enough to figure that out. I suppose edgy brats don't know anything these days. At least back in my day, they knew something."

"Quit mocking us, bastard!" Dark Pit demanded. "Hand over Cia, or we will take her by fucking force!"

"Do you seriously think I'm just going to hand Cia over just like that?" Morshu asked the crew. "I have a goal, you know. After all, I didn't just bomb the cookie factory and ruin the Temple of Souls for nothing. Do you realize how much of a waste doing all that nonsense would be if I just gave her away?"

"Th-those crimes! You were the one who did all of that?!" Shadow stammered. "But I thought-"

"It doesn't matter what you thought!" Morshu yelled. "It's time to show you my power!"

"Battle stances, everyone!" Dark Pit ordered. "It's time to sharpen our blades to complete edge!" Before anyone could attack, a bright light flashed throughout the room, quickly disappearing as an Azumarill, a Weezing, a Infernape, an Emolga, a Sudowoodo, and a Malamar now stood by Morshu's side.

"Shit! He has backup!" Viridi cursed.

"Damn straight I do!" the shopkeeper shouted. "Let's fight off those pricks, my friends!"

"Azu!" Azumarill shouted, lunging for Greninja. The Ninja Pokémon normally would have dodged, but there was something about the Aqua Rabbit Pokémon that distracted him. For the first time in his life, Greninja experienced... love.

... Of course, not dodging resulted in him getting pummeled until he fainted from Azumarill's Play Rough attack.

"Move, move!" Dark Pit commanded the crew. Wolf dashed straight for Emolga, but Infernape used a Fire Punch attack to stop the canine in his tracks, before assaulting the wolf with a Close Combat. Viridi tried to get in close to Morshu, but Weezing blasted her with Sludge Bomb, blinding the goddess' vision.

"Damn! Fucking acid!" Viridi cried out, running around in circles. Weezing let out a light chuckle before he used Fire Blast on the poor edgehead, knocking her out.

"Taste my Lamp Oil Wave, Dork Pot!" Morshu shouted towards Dark Pit, insantly showering him in lamp oil.

"Gah! It's in my fucking eye!" Meanwhile, Robin kept trying to teleport away from Malamar, but whenever he did, Mthe Pokémon somehow managed to know where the tactician was going to end up and made it there before he could.

"I... can't... lose!" Wolf whimpered as his body gave out. Infernape laughed at the canine's pain before he moved on to attack Mr. Game and Watch, would kept his distance from the battle.

"I need a damn opening..." Game and Watch thought to himself, studying the battle carefully. "I need to get to that damn ice cream bitch..."

"INFERNAPE!" Infernape roared as he grabbed the 2D man from behind, before the monkey leaped into the air and threw Game and Watch back to the ground. As his finishing move, Infernape fell straight towards the hardly conscious body of the 2D being, smashing him with a Thunder Punch as he was right about to crush Game and Watch.

"What... the hell?!" Dark Pit shouted. All members except Lucas, Shadow, and himself were knocked out, as Morshu's team was too strong. Said salesman laughed at the crew's failure. Today truly was the greatest day of his life so far.

"Couldn't win, eh?" Morshu taunted. "Not a surprise, honestly. But I was expecting more effort than that crappy excuse for a fight."

"Fuck off! You won't get away with this!" Lucas roared.

"But I already have!" Morshu responded. "By now, Cia should be thrown out of this place by now, stuck in the nearby woods! Soon to be dinner for the Ursaring that live there!"

"Shit! This fight was a scam to keep us here!" Shadow cursed, clenching his fist. "We need to leave, ASAP!"

"We can't just leave the rest of our gang here either, though!" Lucas reminded the hedgehog.

"Please, me and my associates are done with this place," Morshu said. "You can have your buds rest up here while we move out. Now, get us out of here, Malamar."

"Mar," Malamar said as all six of Morshu's Pokémon and the fat man himself vanished.

"... Well then, let's go find Cia!" Shadow said.

**XxXx**

Morshu, Azumarill, Mewtwo, and Fat Pikachu were out in the middle of the woods, sitting around a campfire. Everyone laughed at how plan one of their plan went perfect, much better than expected.

"Part one is complete," Mewtwo said. "Now for part two."

"Speaking of which, Harkinian has already agreed to help us develop a supreme Dinner Blaster, specifically designed to end Cia," Morshu gladly stated. "All I need is for Robotnik to lend a hand and then part two is finished."

"Good thing we planted that tracking device on that hunk of junk, eh Mewtwo?" Fat Pikachu quoted. "Especially since she has no clue you are on this scheme too!"

"Hell yes. With that device stuck inside her stomach, there's no way they'll ever find it, and we will always know where they are!" the edgy Pokémon chuckled. "Speaking of which, I bet those fucking cowards are running back to Station Square!"

"I'll alert Colress of this. You three find Watharja in the meantime," Morshu commanded as he pulled out his cell phone.

"Affirmative," Fat Pikachu stated with a salute before the trio of Pocket Monsters wandered out of the woods.

**XxXx**

"Weren't expecting the WAA Weirdos to make an appearance? Too bad, Waluigi time!"

Wario, Waluigi, Snake, Metal Sonic, and Gengar were all having pizza at the Pizza Hut, sitting right next to the doors. So far, no luck had come about the location of the Hot Topic Krew, but the emissary was not willing to give up that easily.

"Who are you talking to?" Gengar asked as he swallowed some pizza crust.

"Just the fourth wall, no big deal," Waluigi answered. "I just want us to get more attention next time!"

"Why are you worrying about that?" Wario brought up. "This story is all about us. We'll get the spotlight back soon."


	17. Ch 17: Memeing Rivals

**Chapter 17: Memeing Rivals**

"Ahh! What a wonderful day!"

Wario, Waluigi, Falco, Crazy Hand, Mermaid Man, and Funky Kong were taking a stroll through Station Square, admiring the lovely day. Many citizens of the city constantly asked for autographs, with the gang more than happy to do so. Even though they there on the lookout for the Hot Topic Krew, they couldn't help but slightly lose track of their goal.

"You said it!' Funky agreed with Wario's comment. "The only thing that could make this day better would be some sweet jazz!"

"I'll just praise the Bread God for giving us such a great day!" Falco happily said.

"It does seem nice... but things won't stay like this..." Crazy whispered to the rest of the group.

"Don't worry, young fellow!" Mermaid Man assured the giant hand. "We'll put an end to this Death Hand and his cult!"

"Yeah, what he said!" Wario said. "But, we still need to find the Hot Topic Krew!"

**XxXx**

On the rooftops of Station Square, four figures were watching the small group of WWE members stroll through the city.

"So, that must be a portion of that WAA Weirdos Emissary group we've heard about," one of the figures said. "But why are they looking for the Hot Topic Krew?"

"Maybe they plan on giving those edgeheads a shower of coconut creampies!" another, much bulkier figure suggested.

"Damn it DK, can you please not act like a pervert for once!" the first figure complained.

"Gee Shulk, what ever happened to being a meme? Can I no longer say Expand Dong or any of that shit?" DK asked.

"Uggg... fine, but let's at least act a little serious here, please?" Shulk said. DK nodded, and the group's focus went back to the WWE, who were now walking out of sight.

"What do you think we should do about them?" another figure asked.

"I say we confront them ourselves and see what they want with the edgeheads," Shulk stated.

**XxXx**

Palutena, as well as the rest of the current members of the Cute Toot House, were still inside their apartment in Mauville Hills. Zelda was packing her things, finally ready to leave the group.

"I do wish you could stay with us Zelda, but I can understand why you must leave," Palutena said to the princess.

"Yeah. I honestly don't want to leave myself, but I have other things I must do now," Zelda replied. "If things do get really bad though, just let me know. I'll rush over to help in anyway I can."

"Thanks, Zel," Palutena said with a smile.

"Speaking of leaving though, I thought Mario was quitting the club too," Zelda remarked.

"Eh, I changed my mind," the portly plumber responded. "After all, I am the mascot! I can't just leave. Besides, this club has went through enough loses recently. Why bother adding more onto that pile?"

"I suppose that answers that question then," the princess said. "In that case, I must take my leave. Good bye, everyone!"

"Bye!" Toadette squeaked while Zelda left the apartment.

"So, when's Toon Link heading over here?" Tiny Kong asked.

"He should be here soon," Toadette answered. "He just texted me a few minutes ago, saying his boat landed in Slateport safely. I'd say it will take him an hour or two at worst for him to get here."

**XxXx**

"Damn, more big businesses?" Morshu sighed. His group were busy staring at a new Burger King that was just set up not too far from the Ocean Palace Zone. "I swear, this is just getting annoying at this point.

"You heard what we agreed on in the meeting, Morshu," Gay Piplup said. "We have to send someone in there and see if we can get any juicy info before we can eliminate the place."

"You're right," the shopkeeper replied, pulling out a Poke Ball. After tossing it into the air, Morshu's Infernape popped out and safely landed on the soft sand.

"Infernape!" the Pokémon roared excitedly.

"Infernape, I need you to infiltrate that Burger King over there and see if you can find anything important out," Morshu ordered.

"Nape!" the monkey obeyed, running towards the fast food restaurant as fast as his legs could take him.

"Well, now that we have that problem under control, what should we do now?" Mewtwo wondered.

"Eh, I'll call Harkinian. I need to let him know that Robotnik agreed to helping with the Dinner Blaster," Morshu said.

"Whatever," Fat Pikachu said. "Gay Piplup and I are heading towards the Krusty Krab for lunch."

"I'm heading back home to upload some crap about Cia. Catch you later," Mewtwo said as everyone took their different paths.

"Well, I guess it's just you and me, Azumarill," the shopkeeper said to the Aqua Rabbit Pokémon.

"Azu," Azumarill squeaked.

"I suppose I should make that call."

**XxXx**

"And that's why I can't stand burritos," Wario told the rest of the small group he was currently in. The incomplete WWE were continuing their patrol through the town, not concerned about the potential dangers that lurked throughout the alleyways.

"Meh, I can't stand those things either," Funky commented.

"Hey guys, looks like a ragtag group of losers is coming this way," Waluigi said, getting everyone's attention. He pointed to a small group of four, which consisted of Shulk, DK, Little Mac, and Riki.

"Hello, WAA Weirdos Emissary!" Shulk greeted. "Are you really feeling it?"

"If you mean I'm feeling my brain cells die off because of your presence, then yes, I am feeling it," Wario insulted.

"If Weegee was here, he'd comment on the irony," Waluigi noted.

"Hey, can't you treat me with some respect?!" Shulk groaned.

"I would, but if you want me to be truthful, you're in between a rock and a hard place, mate," the fat plumber said.

"Riki no like dicks!" Riki shouted.

"Not now, Riki," Shulk said before continuing his main point. "At either point, I do have a question for you guys: what do you want with the Hot Topic Krew?"

"Who said you deserve to know!" Wario yelled. "Mind your own business!"

"Wow, I know we just met, but you really can't tell me anything, club leader to club leader?"

"Waa? You're in charge of a club yourself?" Waluigi asked.

"A rather lame club, judging from the looks of it," Wario muttered.

"Plus, their story hasn't been updated for forever," Funky added.

"Can you please stop being such jerks and just answer my damn question?!" Shulk inquired, really feeling pissed.

"Why? We clearly can't trust you," Wario bluntly said. "After all, you're just a bunch of pests, and not even decent pests at that. Your leader looks like he's been doing drugs, the ape looks like a massive pervert that's worse than Snake, the boxer looks laughably stupid, and the little guy over there looks like some insane Christian."

"Riki completely pissed now! Riki kill bitches!" the stupid Heropon roared before running towards the WWE. Before he could land a single scratch, Waluigi sent him flying with his trusty tennis racket.

"What's going on here?!" a policeman Waddle Dee wondered just as Riki crashed into Fred the Fish.

"My leg!" Fred cried.

"These idiots keep trying to annoy us!" Wario told the Waddle Dee.

"Well, well, well, if it isn't the MemeMemeMeme Brigade!" the cop said. "Up to more trouble, I see! And I hope you haven't been storing some more heroin again!"

"Damn it, run!" Shulk ordered. Little Mac and DK ran after him, but Riki was to injured to do anything.

"Wait, why aren't you going after them?!" Funky questioned, noting that the Waddle Dee didn't bother to chase the MMMB members.

"Bah, I'll find them eventually," the cop answered. "Besides, I can still arrest that little punk over there."

"Riki... no little punk!"

"Tell that to the judge, little pest!" Waddle Dee told the Heropon, placing handcuffs on him.

"Well, that was awkward," Waluigi said.

"At least it wasn't any worse," Wario replied. "We could have started a fight or something." Falco then got a call. Pulling out his cell phone, the space bird answered said call.

"We got nothing so far," Malleo said on the other side of the call. "How about you guys?"

"Nope, we haven't found any clues either," Falco reported.

"Hmm, that's not good. What does Wario want is to do next?"

"Wario, Malleo's calling me. He wants to know what we should do next." The fat plumber thought about it for a few seconds, before he arrived at a conclusion.

"Well, it is nearly lunch time, so I guess we should head back to Pizza Hut to eat," the yellow idiot said.

"Good call, I feel like I'm about to starve," Funky said while Falco told Malleo what to do and hanging up the call.

"Good! Now let's go get some pizza!" Waluigi cheered.

"Pizza!" Chica shouted, running towards the Pizza Hut with a crowbar in hand.

**XxXx**

Shulk, DK, and Little Mac swiftly entered the Mad Monster Mansion, before locking the doors up as fast as possible.

"Sweet Mama Luigi, why are you guys locking the doors?" Captain Falcon asked the trio. "And where in the hell is Riki?"

"Judging from the looks of things, they ran into the police again," Ike said.

"Yeah, and they have Riki too!" Little Mac added.

"Great, now we have to bust the spawn of Sarah out of jail," Falcon grumbled.

"Spawn of Sarah?" DK sarcastically asked. "Hell no, Riki isn't that bad."

"The hell have you been smoking lately?" Nikki questioned. "That guy killed twelve people because they were gay!"

"Forget about rescuing Riki, we need to get revenge!" Shulk screamed.

"What? On who?" Marth wondered.

"Those WAA Weirdos Emissary jerks!" Little Mac answered. "They're the reason Riki is in jail to begin with!"

"Come on, how much of dicks were they being?" Nikki , scratching the back of her head.

"They poisoned our water supply, burned our crops, and delivered a plague onto this house!" Little Mac claimed.

"They did?!" Everyone but Shulk, DK, Mac, and Ike asked in horror.

"We have crops?" Ike thought inside his head.

"No! But are we going to wait around until they do?!" Mac responded.

"I say we tip Shulk over!" Marth suggested, with everyone else sans Monado Boy himself surprisingly agreeing.

"Hey!" Shulk yelled as the rest of his gang knocked him over.

"Now what?" Captain Falcon asked. There was absolute silence for a few seconds until DK suggested something.

"Let's plant some crops!" Everyone agreed to the suggestion, but poor Shulk couldn't get up and follow the rest of his gang.

"It's been one of those days," Monado Boy sighed.

"Hey, nobody steals my quotes on my watch!" Fat Mario said to Shulk, kicking the Hom while doing so.

**XxXx**

"Gahaha!" Colress laughed inside his not so evil lair inside Fourside. "Very soon, Lana shall be mine!"

"What's the plan, boss man?" Rotom asked his pathetic master.

"It's elementary, dear Rotom!" the scientist chuckled. "All I have to do is kidnap Lana's current boyfriend, Crossbow Training Link! And since Morshu just delivered the lamp oil, rope, bombs, and ice cream I asked him to give me, it should be a piece of cake!"

"Ooh, cake! Can we have some later?! Maybe we can go to Meloetta's and have icing flavor cake?!" Rotom spazzed.

"Not if you keep acting insane like that! There's no such thing as icing flavor cake!" Colress reminded his Pokémon.

"Blast all the dongs!" Rotom cursed.

"Say, I just realized that I haven't seen Magnezone all damn day! Where is that metal head?"

"Either he's up your arse, or he's just being a lazy bum somewhere around."

"... Must you suggest the stupidest of things?" Colress questioned.

"It's my main trait, what do you expect? I'm far from normal, not only personality wise, but type wise as well!" the Pokémon stated.

"Whatever. Just look for that magnet master," Colress ordered.

"Alrighty!" Rotom giggled, flying out of the room.

**XxXx**

"Fufufu... poor little Icarus is such an airhead... thinking that he's the main villain... what a joke of a antagonist."

The same villain who destroyed Castelia City was inside the once abandoned New Mauville, staring at a recently built computer. All of the Pokémon who have originally lived there fled the instant the villain and the remains of Team Plasma invaded the place.

"Time to give those Plasma and Galactic members their orders."

After pressing a few buttons on the control panel, Cyrus, the original leader of Team Galactic, and Zinzolin appeared on the computer screen.

"Ah, if it isn't Mr. Mystery. New orders, I assume?"

"Yes, Cyrus. Nothing major: I just want you two to lurk around two major Hoenn cities to see if we can find some info on where Shadow the Hedgehog is. Zinzolin, I want you and your Plasma troops to hang around Lilycove."

"Understood."

"Cyrus, you and your grunts are to head to Mauville."

"Rodger."

"Good. I hope to hear from you two again soon."

As quick as a flash, the computer turned off, and the villain began to laugh.

"I almost feel sorry for those two fools... thinking that they are my equals... too bad I'm far superior to those failures. I just hope they don't get too upset when I betray them."

The evil creature turned the computer on again, which showed a map of all of Hoenn. Most of the map seemed normal, except for Route 120, which flashed in red.

"Oh, it seems that the pathetic Yoshi that is working for Icarus the dick is in that wasteful route, eh?" I guess it's time for part two of the "End Icarus" operation."

After press a big, green button, a Yoshi appeared on the screen.

"Oh, hi Mr. Weird Guy! What are you calling me for?"

"I'll just cut to the chase: the Yoshi that "replaced" you is somewhere in Route 120 of Hoenn. Now, you want proper revenge, right?"

"Heck yeah! That jerk deserves to pay!"

"Good. Now get out there and show him the power you have gained over your extensive training."

"Will do!"

Yoshi disappeared from the screen, leaving the Hoenn map left. The evil creature began to laugh again.

"And then there's that dinosaur who thinks he's working for a good guy, and not a bad guy. Oh well, at least he'll take care of that blasted prep."

**XxXx**

"Sheesh, I'm still tense about what Dry Bowser told us," WWE Master Hand said. The two hands were wandering through the Mushroom Gorge, which was near the Emerald Hill Zone, where WWE Lucario was at. Their progress was much better than expected.

"Me too. The thought of me being a host of a insane demon is just horrifying."

"That's not the only thing that weirds me out. The fact that it was Dry Bowser of all people telling us something that deep is almost mind blowing. I mean, in my universe, he's just your typical guy, no one major."

"Yeah, it's a shame he had to leave as soon as he told us what will happen. He sure is a nice guy to hang around with, especially when most of the Smashers in this world are chaotic idiots."

"How about we change the topic to how we're making tremendous progress? I thought this trip was supposed to take much longer!"

"Oh, that sure is a blessing indeed. As much as I want to stay out of this club nonsense, I am getting a little worried about Station Square myself."

"I just wish we could call your Lucario and see what's happening back there."

**XxXx**

The entire WWE was munching on their fresh cheese pizza. Aside from the workers and two Goombas, the Pizza Hut was empty.

"Mmm, this sure is great pizza!" Funky Kong noted.

"Meh, it's OK to those who have mediocre tastes," Weegee claimed.

"Stop treating yourself as if you're better than everyone else, Geester," Snake said.

"I wouldn't treat myself better if I wasn't, you know."

"Woah, check out the TV!" Wario said. All WWE members turned their heads to the only TV in the restaurant.

"Conker the Squirrel was found dead earlier today by the base of Mt. Pichu," the news reporter on the TV, Bluster Kong, said. "It appears that he was either electrocuted or burnt to death. The only current suspects are the local, wild Pichu who live in the area. While said Pichu are usually friendly creatures, as if late, they appear to have gotten somewhat hostile to outsiders. And now, for our next story, we shall hear the tale of how I, the glorious Bluster Kong, have lost my business and how I deserve it back."

"Stupid ape," Vector growled. "Does he have to give us that stupid story every day?!"

"More importantly, I'm concerned about those Pichu," Gengar said. "Ever since yesterday, they've been acting strange..."

"We can go investigate!" Wario volunteered.

"What about finding the Hot Topic Krew?" Metal Sonic reminded the plumber.

"This shouldn't take too long," Wario claimed. "Besides, we might find some clues on where they are."

"Yeah, let's just help out," Waluigi agreed. "We checked all over town and we haven't found squat."

"Then I suppose it's settled?" Eggman asked.

"Yep! Once we're done eating, we're heading to Mt. Pichu!" Wario said.

**XxXx**

On the top of Mt. Pichu, a lone figure stood. Dead bodies were scattered all over the peak, most of which were fried and had lost appendages. The shrine that once stood was completely destroyed, with one pile of ash being the only remains.

"Soon, I will kill them all... I will show them that I truly am the face of evil..." He stopped his words, staring down the mountain, before looking at a picture of the League of Super Evil before Pichu died. "They shall know the true power of I, Pichu! Hahahaha!"


	18. Ch 18: Of Pichu and Yoshis

**Chapter 18: Of Pichu and Yoshis**

"Here it is, folks! The base of Mt. Pichu!" the driver of the bus that the WWE was riding, Kapp'n, said. Malleo stared out at the woods that surrounded the small mountain, finding it to be a wonderful sight. "Home of the largest Pichu population throughout the entire planet, as well as home to Skinny Pikachu's Light Ball Stand!"

"Alright gang, let's get off this bus and dive right into the mess!" Wario ordered. Everyone climbed out of the rather large bus and got a better view of the wilderness themselves. It truly was amazing to see such an untouched place of nature this close to a city as big as Station Square.

"Gee, it sure is pretty around here!" Falco stated, taking in the wonderful view.

"As much as I would like to stare into this natural beauty myself, we really should head into the investigation," Duck Hunt Dog reminded the space bird.

"Looks like the body's over there, mates," Snake said while pointing to the charred corpse of Conker the Squirrel. Several policemen Waddle Dees and Magmar were all by said corpse, either scarfing down doughnuts or actually doing their job.

"Great! Let's dig in, boys!" Wario said.

"Can you please use better language than that?" Malleo whined. "Thinking about "digging into" that corpse sounds revolting!"

"Wimp," as all Weegee bothered to say as he passed his younger brother.

"Say, looks like the WAA gang is here to lend a hand!" one of the Magmar noted before walking up to them. "Nice to have you heroes here to join the cause!"

"No problem!" Waluigi replied. "So, what do you guys have so far?"

"Well, at this point, we honestly believe that the local Pichu have gone savage here for some reason and have killed that drunk idiot," Magmar claimed. "As much as I hate to do it, the chief wants to close of Mt. Pichu to the public to ensure that this never happens to anyone important."

"Why can't we just try and find whatever is agitating those bums?" Wario suggested.

*Growing Anxiety from Pokémon Mystery Dungeon: Explores of Time/ Darkness begins to play*

"That's what I told the chief, but he said that would be too dangerous," Magmar said, seemingly slightly upset. "But the boss himself as of late has been rather strange... whenever night comes, no one ever finds him at home! People stop by every night, and not a sign of him! To add onto this, he refuses to ever show his face. He always wore a paper bag over his face."

"Who exactly is this chief of yours?" Snake asked.

"Our chief is none other than Professor Layton," Magmar answered.

"And when did he start acting strange?" Metal Sonic continued.

"The day before Evil Marc took over the city, actually," the Pokémon stated. He thought to himself for a bit until he became slightly concerned about something. "Come to think of it... no one else really seemed to notice this before, but that was the same day that the Pichu started going nuts too!"

"Waa! Looks like we're onto something!" Waluigi shouted.

"You don't suppose... Layton himself is responsible for the mad Pichu attack?" Duck Hunt Dog thought out loud.

"What?! Never! He would never do such a thing!" the Spitfire Pokémon argued. "Although... the events being connected sure isn't an impossibility..."

"Woah, another hidden corpse over here, dudes!" one of the Waddle Dees yelled from a small ways into the forest. Everyone stopped what they were doing and ran over to get a closer look. The WWE and the Magmar they were talking to got the best view of the body.

"Charred, just like Conker's," Eggman noted. "But it looks much more... decayed. Must have been here for a few days longer than the nut head's."

"I wish we could tell who it is though..." Snake sighed.

"I can sample their DNA, no matter how destroyed, Metal Sonic claimed. "Even if they were shocked to death."

"Is technology like that even possible?!" Crazy Hand questioned, flabbergasted by Metal Sonic's supposed ability.

"Hey, what do you expect from a scientist like me?!" Eggman shouted.

"While you two are arguing about stupid stuff, I'm going to identify this guy," the robotic Sonic said. He stuck his right hand right into the carcass, and his eyes changed from red to green. After about five minutes of analyzing and Eggman's nonsense, the robot pulled his hand back out and reverted his eyes back to normal. "It's... Layton himself."

"So... the Layton we have been coming across was an imposter!" Magmar said.

"But, who exactly is this imposter? And why is he messing with the Pichu?" Weegee wondered. "Mmm... this is just like a good episode of some mystery show! Me gusta!"

"Looks like we have to split up an search the surrounding area!" Wario commanded. "Waluigi, Falco, Crazy, Funky, you're coming with me! Weegee, you're in charge of Malleo, Snake, and Duck Hunt! Mermaid Man, you, Eggman, Metal Sonic, and Tails are a team! All you cops can decide who goes with who, but no one goes alone! Any objections?"

"None!" everybody shouted.

"Good! Let's get to the bottom of this!"

**XxXx**

"Yahoo! Wow! Yoshi!"

Parts of the planet in the area that is Route 120 as the two Yoshis were having their battle. The good Yoshi was surprisingly winning, with the prep Yoshi barely doing a thing to his foe. The route was nearly void of any other form of non-plant life, leaving no one to get in the way of the battle.

"Blasted punk... how did he get this strong?!" Prep Yoshi grimaced, holding his broken left arm. "Even the Cute Toot House when they were at their full strength was nowhere near this powerful..."

"I went under severe training, jerk!" Good Yoshi shouted with pride. "You replaced me as if I was nothing, and that really grinded my gears! You're the reason I wasn't revealed at E3 2013 like I should have been!"

"Still... this damn strong?!" Prep Yoshi continued with his questions. "That does it... I was playing nicely... but now's time to cheat... Terminators, attack!" A herd of Terminator clones shot up from the forest that surrounded most of Route 120 and flew over towards the battlefield.

"TERMINATE GOOD YOSHI," the leader of the horrid robots ordered.

"Bring it, preppy Terminerds!" Good Yoshi taunted. The first robot tried to bash into his foe at full speed, but didn't anticipate Yoshi jumping over him. The shitty robot couldn't stop and eventually crashed into the Ancient Tomb that housed Registeel.

"Idiots! How can you not anticipate an attack like that?!" Prep Yoshi shouted. One by one, Good Yoshi managed to wreck most of the robots without much trouble. Two crashed into each other, one was swallowed alive, and the list goes on. Only five Terminators were left.

"GOOD YOSHI APPEARS TO HAVE MASSIVE STRENGTH. MAY BE IMPOSSIBLE TO DEFEAT," the leader of the Arnold Schwarzenegger troop stated.

"The hell with that bullshit!" Prep Yoshi roared in a whiny fit. "You five are the strongest of my whole damn army! No way in hell that pest will take you down! Now kick his ass to the moon!"

"UNDERSTOOD. TEAM, LAUNCH FULL SCALE SCHWARZENEGGER ATTACK."

"Please, won't you plebs just give up?!" Good Yoshi smirked as he put on the most badass pair of sunglasses that you will ever see.

"YOU SHALL UNDERSTAND YOUR FULL POWER, LOWER LIFE FORM," the leader Terminator told the good dinosaur as the five began to fuse into a Mega Terminator. By the end of their transformation, the once five robots were now one, ten foot tall, black and red colored replica of none other than the Pokémon Mew itself. "FEEL THE WRATH OF YOUR MAKER."

"Bring it, then!"

**XxXx**

"Two hours of searching, and not a sight of those Pichu or even any other clues! What kind of bad luck is this?!" Wario grumbled. The small group were wandering through the woods on the southern side of the mountain, which was strangely, despite the fact that the area never had cold weather before, almost cold enough to allow snow to form.

"And why is it so cold? My fingers are freezing!" Waluigi whined.

"Come on, it's not that bad. And this is coming from someone who lives on a tropical island and is completely new to the concept of cold weather!" Funky stated.

"GAH! HELP US!" a voice shouted, which echoed throughout the entire woodland.

"That sounded like that Magmar guy!" Falco said.

"Then let's chase after him!" Wrio ordered. The small gang rushed through the trees, running over any animals or Pokémon that they came across.

**XxXx**

"So, one of your own has betrayed my cause? I'm surprised a fellow Pichu would leave another hanging like this!" the Pichu who was once a member of the League of Super Evil roared. He somehow was beginning to mutate, as his size was much taller than even a Raichu, his eyes were now empty sockets with blood leaking out of them, and he seemed to have razor-like claws on his fingers.

"I-I wish to know why h-he left us as well, my lord..." a regular Pichu stammered, rather intimidated by his master's new appearance. "What do you suppose we do?"

"It's too late now to stop him. I must prepare myself for the battle ahead... not like I will need much training regardless. My power is rising faster than I have suspected."

**XxXx**

"What's all the commotion about?!" Wario asked with tons of worry, peering through the bushes. He noticed that there, in a small forest clearing, was a sole Pichu standing on one side, seemingly innocent, and the entire investigation team on the other, quite scared.

"I don't want to hurt anybody!" the Pichu squeaked.

"Yeah, I bet!" Waluigi shouted from behind the bush. Leaping over said undergrowth, he landed smack dab in front of the little baby. "And I'm a nuclear pickle!"

"Nuclear pickle! Me wants some!" Crazy Hand spazzed. In seconds, he darted from the bush and grabbed his purple pal. "Waluigi?! You're a nuclear pickle?"

"He was being sarcastic, dumbass!" Weegee said as he and the rest of the WWE came out from the other end of the small clearing. "Sheesh, don't you know anything?"

"I can count to Mudkip!"

"Forget I asked."

"Quiet!" Wario shouted. "What is going on here?!"

"I just want to tell these guys about what that monster on top of the mountain has been forcing us to do!" Pichu sniffled, getting a slight cold from the weather.

"Wait... some monster has been forcing you Pichu to do its biding?" Falco calmly asked.

"Yes... a fellow Pichu, actually. An extremely vicious one who arrived a few days ago," Pichu responded with a sneeze. "He claimed he came from the place where that devil thing comes from, hopping from universe to universe, killing many innocents along the way."

"WHAT?! WHY IN ARCEUS' NAME WOULD HE DO THAT FOR?!" Waluigi asked, clearly pissed with the vicious Pichu on the mountain.

"... Revenge..." the baby whispered before passing out.

"What the?! Why did he pass out like that?!" Malleo wondered, ready to panic.

"Legend's has it that the weather drops to bone chilling degrees when something has upset the spirit's of the original settlers that arrived here," one of the Waddle Dees claimed. "He must be getting a sever cold from this weather, and it's only going to get worse."

"Then we need to hurry!" Wario said.

"I honestly don't feel safe with just us," Falco said, beginning to shiver from the cold.

"But who can we call upon? The police still have to bury their chief, and there's no one else here to help us." Snake said.

"Who said we couldn't lend a hand?" a familiar voice inquired from behind the Pichu's limp body. Malleo's already wide eyes grew wider, recognizing the owner of the voice.

"Is that who I think it is?!" the idiotic meme screeched. That's when four figures stepped through the scrubs and revealed themselves, the largest one letting out a burp in doing so.

"Better out than in, I always say," the big guy (for you) chuckled.

"OMG IT'S MOTHER FUCKING SHREK SHREK IS LOVE SHREK IS LIFE I LIKE TACOS WHERES MY PEANUT BUTTER NEVER LEAVE YOUR EXPANSION PAK AT HOME!1!?" Malleo shrieked loud enough that the entire planet shook, before he went flying around as if he was a doll in Gmod.

"Hey, what about me, Deadpool?" the tall superhero/ villain/ whatever asked.

"Fuck you," Malleo cursed, stopping right in front of the tall guy. "Get out of my life."

"I sure do love it when my big bro acts like how he's supposed to. Tell him that you'll rip his legs off if he doesn't leave!" Weegee encouraged his brother.

"Not now, memehead," Waluigi sighed. "Malleo, quit floating in the air like that!"

"NO I MUST CONTINUE SPAZZING ABOUT SHREK NOW GO PEE ON A TREE HAM IS BAD FOR YOUR LEGS SAMUS IS OVERRATED JVOJ009jejwfoOMm0x98xhd[;=='/=D-a6r,k5W1a*lu=t4e$e#g5e%e!" Malleo somehow managed to say before continuing his awkward flying.

"Does that always happen to him whenever he meets a specific person?" Shrek asked.

"Naw, forget about it," Wario told the ogre. "What I would like to know though is why do you want to help us? Aren't you in an evil group?"

"I honestly don't know who I am anymore," the ogre answered. "I can't decide if I want to stick with the rest of the gang or if I should leave and form my own group. But, even if I am a villain or not, I can't believe some monster would do such a thing to such poor creatures, just for his own ends! I've meet some ruthless villains before, but this is insane!"

"I-I don't think I can do it, Shrek," Magolor whimpered. "I'm too weak."

"And that's why we can out here in the first place, to get stronger," Shrek reminded the little, wimpy alien.

"Well, I'm certainly not against having you guys helping us! Welcome aboard!" Wario said happily.

"What do we do about the Pichu right there though? We can't just leave him here!" Falco said.

"I'll take him with us. Hopefully my body heat will radiate onto him," Shrek suggested.

"Now, what do we do about food?" Weegee wondered.

"I'm sure he still have a ton of food and water in the trucks of our cars," the Magmar from before said.

"Neat! Now, let's roll!"

**XxXx**

"FINAL SHADOW BALL, INITIATE."

"Hyper Lightning Beam, charge up strength!"

"This battle really has gotten the intensity level turned way up," Prep Yoshi commented. Most of Route 120 was ablaze, forcing the remaining Pokémon in the area to flee. Good Yoshi, now wearing a samurai outfit, pulled out a sword, which was glowing in a bright blue. Mewinator, as Prep Yoshi liked to call it, started charging up an extreme Shadow Ball from its paws.

"SAY YOUR PRAYERS, GOOD YOSHI. MEET YOUR SHADOWY DOOM."

"By the power of Zekrom, feel thy taste of ye own medicine! Hyper Lightning Beam, unleash!"

A large blast of blue lightning came from the tip of Good Yoshi's blade as Mewinator launched a super sized Shadow Ball. The attacks collided, resulting in a massive explosion. The fire was somehow put out, leaving only the charred remains of the route. Both Good Yoshi, Mewinator, and Prep Yoshi still stood, but all three took damage, with the later nearly ready to pass out.

"WE ARE EQUALS. IF YOU WISH, WE COULD END THIS BATTLE NOW, AND YOU COULD JOIN OUR SIDE. SERIOUSLY, CONSIDER. WE HAVE COOKIES," Mewinator said.

"I... refuse to join forces with the enemy!" Good Yoshi shouted.

"Please, don't... make it hard..." Prep Yoshi panted. "We can rule the world and even betray that Icarus. Don't you want that..."

"No! You tainted my good name! I bet even Mario hates me now for what you have done!"

"So... who cares about that damn plumber..."

"That does it. He may not care about me anymore, but if you ever say no one cares about him, you're dead wrong."

"You'll... regret that decision..."

"I recall telling you the exact same thing when you tossed me out of town. But unalike I, you won't get your chance to get revenge."

"Yes... I will! Termicarpet, I summon you!" A metallic magic carpet flew in from above and lifted Prep Yoshi and Mewinator to safety.

"Blast it all! I will get you, atrocious prep!"

"Good luck on... pulling that off... away we go!"

"No, get back here!" But it was too late. The magic carpet flew away before Good Yoshi could do a single thing about it.

"Looks like someone failed to exterminate his target," Zinzolin commented, standing right behind Good Yoshi.

"What do you want, supposed guy turned good?" Good Yoshi inquired, raising an eyebrow.

"Hey, I just came here to see some carnage!" Zinzolin said in defense. "But, I suppose that training was a waste after all, eh?"

"Shut it. I'm going back to hunting that punk."

"Oh gee, my bad! I did have a secret of that stupid imposter of yours, but I guess a secret weakness surely isn't worth listening to, now is it?"

"... Alright, I'm listening."

**XxXx**

"So, you got roughed up by something so badly you don't even want to talk about it? Am I correct?"

"Yes, Lord Icarus," Prep Yoshi said. The evil dinosaur's face was on Icarus' flat screen TV, with the evil OC sitting in his luxurious chair of death and bacon. "What hurts most however, is my pride. Not only have I failed you in our quest for the Regi, but after that harsh battle... my pride is dying by the second."

"All right. I hope we will be able to talk about when you get here, but if you don't want to, fine," Lord Icarus the Dick said. "But if this happens again... I will punish you for it."

"Understood. Over and out." The TV then turned to Channel 666, also known as Death's Channel.

"Will the Grim Reaper finally get his show back on Cartoon Network? Tune in next time!"

"God damn, I hated that show," Icarus groaned. "That's the one good thing CN did right."

**XxXx**

"Still sitting around like a lazy ass, eh Icarus? Well, I'm capable of making you get up and take a walk, if you know what I mean... and when I mean that, I mean killing off your League of Super Shits."

The evil leader behind the death of Castelia City was watching Icarus through his high tech computer. The dark angel got up to get some food as the mystery villain began to laugh.

"Oh, yes... Anal, I really wouldn't trust Bane right now..."


	19. Ch 19: Up Mt Pichu (Ft Shrek)

**Chapter 19: Up Mt. Pichu (Ft. Shrek)**

Snow began to fall over the Mt. Pichu area as the WWE, the four LOSE members Shrek, Deadpool, Magolor, and Tingle, and the policemen stood at the entrance to the mountain path. Wario looked straight towards the hardly visible peak, really wanting to kick some major butt.

"Got all the food and water, gang?" Wario asked, still staring at the peak.

"Funk yeah we do," Funky assured the leader. "Bananas, water, granola bars, and garlic. More than enough to get us to the top and back down with no worries."

"If you need any help from us, just call the Onett Police Department," Magmar told the gang. "Alright boys! Let's go bury Layton!"

"Looks like it's just us," Tingle muttered as the policemen went to their cars.

"... Then let's roll," Wario said quietly. Everyone opened the gates to the mountain, ready to defeat the evil that lurked above.

**XxXx**

"Just as I suspected... Icarus appears to be after the Regi Pokémon."

The mystery villain was sitting in a large chair, staring at images of Prep Yoshi hanging around the areas in Hoenn that housed the ruins that contained the Pokémon Regice, Registeel, and Regirock.

"Hmmm... not sure why he wants both the Regi and the four well known essences, but I see no point in not trying to screw up his plans on getting either. After all, I am the true villain here. I can't let some minor fool keep walking around as if he controls the streets. Oh well, I've been saving my secret weapon for a reason."

Whipping out his cell phone, he tried to make a call.

"What's up?"

"Change of plans, Cyrus. Gather all of your goons and report back here immediately. I plan on dropping Project SMBZ in Mauville, and you might even get yourselves killed if you dawdle around there for much longer."

"Understood."

**XxXx**

"Palutena, slow down!" Toadette screeched. All the CTH members, including the new member Toon Link, were driving around Mauville City and through it's outskirts, having a race to take their minds off of Icarus and his goons for a bit.

"Why? I won't win if I do that!" Palutena said in her trollish manner, acting like her typical self.

"Looks like she's happy once again," Mario commented, swerving past a Volbeat. "Now it's a matter of time until she starts her farting up again..."

"Eh, they usually don't smell that bad," Fox replied while pulling right next to Mario. The space vulpine took a quick sniff of the air, only to gag violently. "Gah! Never mind, never mind, it is that bad!" Fox lost control of his car and went sliding right into the northern pond of Route 117, where a Corphish pinched his nuts.

"I'm gonna win, I'm gonna win!" Palutena sang while doing her unattractive pole dance.

"No you won't!" a voice shouted from way behind the rest of the racers. Before anyone could identify the voice, Palutena lost control of her car, which crashed into a pine tree.

"What was that?!" Palutena wondered as her anger levels grew. That's when a race car, driven by Dick Dastardly and his sidekick Muttley stopped right next to her. "Oh great... if it isn't the tiny dick..."

"That's a rather poor sexual pun, Pale Tuna!" Dick said with a smirk. "I've heard it a million times!"

"And like I haven't heard that pun a million times myself. Now, you better apologize for what you've done, or else I will kick some major bass," the green goddess threated.

"Sorry, but I'm too cool for saying sorry!" Dick taunted, driving away as fast as his car could go.

**XxXx**

The temperature kept dropping as the WWE and Shrek's gang walked up the mountain path. Snow was beginning to fall rather heavily, and it didn't seem like it was going to melt soon.

"Man, someone really needs to turn up the AC," Tails moaned. "It's colder than the Ice Cap Zone here!"

"Thankfully, I'm immune to the low temperature," Metal Sonic responded.

"The rest of us aren't though, jerk!" Malleo shouted at the robot with no personality. "The inside of my nose feels like it's freezing up!"

"I doubt that, lemme see," Wario said, turning around and walking towards Malleo.

"Wario, what in the fuck are you doing?!" Weegee asked while our yellow hero somehow managed to open Malleo's left nostril wide enough that Wario himself could fit in.

"Yep, you have teeny, tiny icicles hanging from your nose hairs, mate," Wario stated. "Heck, it even looks like the germs inside your nose are even making snowmen!"

"Hey, who's that guy over there?" One of said germs asked his buds, pointing towards the yellow moron.

"I dunno, but he sure is hella ugly," another germ stated.

"Wario, get your nose out of there and let's keep moving!" Snake ordered, sick of the plumbers shenanigans. Wario pulled his head out of Malleo's disgusting nose and the gang started climbing back up the rocky path.

"Sheesh, fairies are not meant to be up places like this!" Tingle said, shivering slightly.

"Eh, the cold never bothered me anyways," Shrek replied.

"Well, anyone married to the ice queen wouldn't be bothered by the damn cold!" Snake snarled.

"Can we just calm down? Remember what Wario said back in space: arguing with each other will just lead us to our graves in a war like this," Tails reminded the gang.

"Tails' right, guys," Duck Hunt said. "Let's take our anger out on whatever insane Pichu is up there."

"I like the sounds of that. Let's march!" Funky agreed.

**XxXx**

Morshu and his gang, minus Gay Piplup, stood at the pier of Seaside Hill. The gay Pokémon had been left in charge of the stand once again, as the rest of the workers of the ice cream stand heading to the Battle Resort to meet Dr. Robotnik and King Harkinian. Morshu's plans were going far better than initially expected, causing the shopkeeper to grin widely.

"I can't wait for the boat to get here... soon, I will eliminate Cia... no, the entire Lancia family itself!" Morshu shouted with pride, raising his fist high in the air. "I haven't been this happy since the day I got married!"

"Wait, you're married?! Since when did this happen?!" Fat Pikachu gasped.

"Well, uh... it's a long story, involving Cia," the shopkeep explained, still not wanting anyone else to know what happened to Koridai way back.

"Well, if you don't want to talk about it, that's fine," Mewtwo said. "If you ever want to, just talk with us."

"Yeah! After all, that's what friends are for!" the fat rodent said cheerfully. "Oh, look! The boat's here!"

"Now, let's move onward! To the Battle Resort!" Morshu shouted as the boat docked at the pier.

**XxXx**

The skies were cloudy as they usually were. Wingull, Pelipper, and Fearow were flying through, heading to their respective destinations. There was one thing in the sky however, that was not a normal sight to these parts. It was none other than a flying carpet, with Gwonam and Harkinian riding it.

"Mah boi, it sure is a nice day today!" the friendly king commented, enjoying the great view of both the sky and the sea below.

"It sure is, your majesty," Gwonam said while taking in a long sniff of the salty air. "Hopefully, Koridai can once again see skies like this soon, was Cia is dealt with once and for all."

"I just wonder what Morshu has in mind with this new Dinner Blaster's design. After all, never has a Dinner Blaster been created to be a death machine, just a mere weapon to slow down those who dare threaten the safety of someone's loved ones," Harkinian said. The wind began to pick up, with storm clouds forming in the distance. "I also wonder what's for dinner!"

"You'll never change, your majesty," Gwonam chuckled.

**XxXx**

The Cute Toot House, Dick Dastardly, and Muttley stood in the main square of Mauville City. Just a few hours prior, the city was filled with people, but know, not a single soul was in sight. Some dead bodies laid across the city, most with bullet holes in them.

"What happened? Everything was fine just two hours ago!" Mario wondered.

"I told you guys I heard gun shots from the city earlier! Fox yelled.

"I knew leaving the city would be a bad idea... I shouldn't have tried to make myself feel better," Palutena said, looking towards the ground.

"It's not your fault, Pal," Toadette assured. "But still... what happened?"

"That blue moster happened, that's what!" an old, raspy voice from behind said. The gang turned around to see none other than the usually cheerful Wattson standing behind them.

"Blue monster?" Fox inquired.

"Yes, he- oh no, he's right there!" Wattson shrieked.

"What?! Where?!" Mario panicked.

"There! Up in the sky!"

**XxXx**

Up in the skies above Mauville, a blue robot floated. His mono eye looked down at the once happy city, locating the CTH and Co. The robot specifically analyzed Palutena, noticing the Essence of Light within her blood. After a quick chuckled, said robot started charging up energy.

"Fear me, fools... for I am Mecha Sonic, the ultimate robot!"

**XxXx**

"Gah! I'm outta here!" Wattson screamed as he ran away.

"Prepare for your death, Palutena! The Essence of Light belongs to my master!" Mecha Sonic roared from above.

"Blast! He must be one of Icarus' minions!" Jigglypuff said.

"Icarus... that punk shall pay... let's take whoever this goon down and show him who's the boss!" Palutena shouted. Mecha Sonic slowly touched the ground, not intimidated by the group at all.

"Please, just a group of idiots and a goddess? Well, the cheating racer might serve as a challenge," Mecha Sonic taunted.

"Well, at least someone recognizes my power!" Dick said as Muttley chuckled.

"I was being sarcastic, nimrod," the blue robot bluntly stated. "Learn to use those brain cells, if you have any."

"Grrr, annoying piece of tin!" the cheater shouted. "It's morphing time!"

"What the hell is this, Power Rangers?" Fox wondered. A bright light blocked everyone else's view, even the blue robot's. After a few moments, the light cleared up and revealed that Dick was now inside a battle mech, with machine guns for hands.

"Now, I shall unleash my true cheating power! Prepare for your doom, pathetic excuse for scrap metal!"

"Oh my, like I'm scared of you!" Mecha Sonic yelled. "Heck, I wonder if your Power Level is even something to remotely worth fe-" He was cut off by a blast of dark energy striking his backside. Dick stood behind the robot, chuckling in glee.

"Scared now?" Dastardly smirked. "Now, say your farewells, before I vaporize you!"

"Ha!" Mecha Sonic laughed before vanishing. "You may be much stronger than what my expectations were, but that won't stop me from annihilating you!"

"Where are you, punk?!" Ness questioned, looking all over for the rodent robot. Of course, Mecha Sonic was in one place no one would have guessed. The earth beneath the PK boy erupted as Mecha Sonic emerged from the ground. Fox lunged for the robot using his Illusion Fox move, but Mecha Sonic warped out of the way just in time. The evil robot reappeared right behind Palutena and attempted to cut her throat with razor claws, but Toon Link stopped him by throwing a bomb at the blue pest.

"Let's see how you like this!" Mario shouted, leaping high into the sky. Before Mecha Sonic could react, a hoard of fireballs pelted him, leaving a few burn marks on the robot.

"Please, I could leave a worse burn on you!" the evil robot chuckled before vanishing once again. "CHAOS..." Mecha Sonic, surrounded by a dark red aura, reappeared right behind the now on ground plumber. "BLAST!" The entire square of the city blew up, sending all the CTH members and the Dastardly duo flying towards the surrounding routes. Palutena, Toadette, and Toon Link landed on the southern edge of the city, Route 110.

"Gah... this blasted blue punk is beating us good..." Palutena groaned, quickly getting on her legs.

"I d-don't think I c-c-can keep-p fighting..." the little mushroom girl panted. She had severe burns on her head and arms, and her clothes her charred.

"Oh no... Toon, get Toadette to Slateport and make sure she gets good medical attention!" the goddess commanded.

"Aye, will do!" Toon Link said, lifting the young girl onto his shoulders and running down south.

"Well, it looks like we're all alone, damned goddess!" Mecha Sonic gloated, floating towards the leader of the once strong gang. "And now that we're all by ourselves, why don't we have some fun... you can take your clothes off, I'll light some candles, and then I'll rip that damn fourth essence out of your sad excuse of a body!"

"You're not getting my essence that easily!" Palutena roared. "Especially after what you did to my friend and those innocent people back in Mauville!"

"Not in the mood, honey? Well, too fucking bad, my power greatly surpasses yours! Now, prepare yourself, because the Hour of Reckoning starts now!"

"Not so fast, numskull!" a voice from behind shouted. Before Mecha Sonic could even see who it was, he was hit by a massive laser beam, knocking him back a few hundred feet.

**XxXx**

"Damn it all to hell! Those freaks of nature have a I'ma Firin' Mah Lazor Cannon Over 9000 edition!"

The mystery villain was watching the whole battle. While it was pleased with showdown for the most part, when the table's were turned for the Cute Toot's favor, he wanted it to end.

"Mecha Sonic, get out of there with that essence without getting destroyed!"

"What about killing Palutena?"

"Forget about killing her! Just move on out of that place and report to Mt. Chimney, pronto!"

**XxXx**

"Eh... I suppose I must do whatever it takes to survive at this point..." Mecha Sonic sighed.

"Well, does that mean you're giving up, scarp heap?" Dick asked the evil hunk of junk as Muttley pointed the I'ma Firin' Mah Lazor Cannon right at said piece of metal.

"Yes, although I do suppose I should apologize for the damage I have caused. I really didn't want to do any of this, but my master is quite the brute. In truth, I really don't wish to hurt others. I may be strong, but not strong enough to oppose my master," Mecha Sonic lied.

"How can we believe you? Judging from your attitude back there, it seems that you were more than willing to kill all those people of that city!" Palutena questioned.

"I merely act like a violent, heartless murder to please my master. He can hear my every word. He can see my every movement. I wouldn't reveal this information normally, but... I'm sick of obeying his every command. Even if it means death, I want to escape this blasted, endless nightmare." Dick, Muttley, and Palutena formed a circle, each close enough that they could whisper.

"What do you think? I find it to be a load of hogwash!" Dick claimed. Muttley shrugged since he couldn't say a word.

"I think he might be telling the truth, but I can't think of anyway to telling if he's lying," Palutena whispered. While the cheating racer and the goddess held a small debate, Muttley stared at where Mecha Sonic once was, noting the robot's complete disappearance. Somewhat frightened, the blue dog tapped on the other two's shoulder's, pointing towards where the robot was.

"Drat! He got away!" Dick cursed. Palutena was about to comment on this as well, but she somehow got electrocuted, causing her to fall to the ground.

"Gah! Errrrrgghh..." the leader groaned as she fell into unconsciousness.

"Double drat! Now the green punk is out for the count!" the cheater added. "Muttley, go take this loser to Slateport! I'm going to find the rest of the members of her ragtag gang!" The blue dog just grumbled to himself as barely lifted Palutena onto his shoulders while his only friend ran back towards Mauville.

**XxXx**

"Where is that robotic freak?!" Cyrus muttered. He and a few of his Galactic minions were standing by the cable car station on Mt. Chimney, waiting for a certain blue robot.

"There he is, sir!" one of the grunts informed the leader, pointing towards Mecha Sonic, who was flying right towards them.

"It's about time you showed up, asshole!" Cyrus shouted at the blue punk. "You better at least have the goods to make up for it!"

"Of course I have the goods."

"Really? I suggest you prove it then!" Saturn, Cyrus' second hand man, shouted.

"Gee, you guys sure are crabby today. But, I guess I might as well prove myself either way," Mecha Sonic said. Almost faster than the human eye, he wiped out none other than the Essence of Light, which took the form of an uncut jewel.

"That's the goods, alright," Cyrus said. "Though he could have gotten I here in a much faster time than that."

"Well, I could have, or I could have murdered them slowly and painfully, like a usually do, which is also far more fun!" Mecha Sonic reminded the leader of Team Galactic.

"You don't always have to kill, you know," Saturn huffed.

"Like I care," Mecha replied. "Come on, let's head back to the base. Surely those punks are out of that area by now."

"Hmmm..." a figure from the small woods surrounding the peak of Mt. Chimney muttered. It was none other than the former Cute Toot House member Claus, under his Masked Man appearance, himself. "Another threat to Lucas' safety? I can't allow this." He turned to his sole minion, Villager, before continuing his words. "I've had it. I'm going to eliminate all foes of Lucas. I don't care who they are, I will kill them. Are you with me?"

"... Yes..." Villager silently said.

"Good. Now, it's time to find as many previous Cute Toot House Members as possible. It's time to build my cyborg army!" Claus roared.

**XxXx**

"There it is! The peak!" Wario shouted. The frozen top of the mountain was not far above from the WWE and LOSE members now, only being a quick climb to the top.

"Fin-n-n-ally! Now, let's beat the crud out of this Pichu punk, s-s-s-s-so we can go home and get some cocoa!" Funky Kong shivered. "I'm not sure h-h-h-how you guys are taking this cold so well!"

"Well, I have layers to keep me warm!" Shrek stated.

"Sexy layers..." Malleo thought to himself, drooling at the ogre's body.

"Well, the quicker we quit jabbering, the quicker we can reach the top, which means the quicker we can get home!" Weegee told the group. "Now, let's get our asses in gear and move onward!"


	20. Ch 20: WWE VS Pichu

**Chapter 20: WWE VS Pichu**

"Fufufu... looks like you're finally here, fools," Pichu laughed as the WWE and LOSE gang came into sight. Pichu had mutated even more, now having spikes sticking out of his back, and poison leaking from his mouth. Our heroes gasped at the disgusting sight.

"I feel like I'm gonna be sick..." Magolor muttered.

"Long time no see, eh Shrek? Remember me?" Pichu asked.

"Wait... Pichu?! I thought you were dead!" Shrek responded, taking a few steps back.

"And I thought you were originally female!" Waluigi added.

"I was dead, but I escaped hell and made my way back here, just to kill you!" the electric mouse stated. "As for what my gender is, who gives a shit? It's not like anyone actually reads this story or anything!"

"A lot of people read this story, and awesome people at that!" Malleo yelled. "There's GeneralDarkPit, MerchantAnna..."

"Hell no!" Pichu shouted. "Those maniacs are fucking faggots! Everyone but me is a fucking faggot! But Shrek and the rest of those League of Super Smartasses are the worst faggots, aside from LucarioFan3!"

"Pichu, you're fucking insane! Stop this at once!" the Shrexy Shrek ordered.

"I'm insane? No, you all are! I'm the only fucking sane creature throughout this hellhole of a universe! AND IT LOOKS LIKE YOU WON'T UNDERSTAND WITHOUT A LITTLE PAIN!" Pichu roared as fangs seemingly made out of blood popped out of his mouth "You don't have a single idea of how strong I truly am!"

*I'm Getting Serious! (Go! Go! Starman) begins to play*

"Fucking asshole needs to be taught a lesson!" Weegee said, lunging for the insane Pokémon. Pichu vanished right as Weegee was about to attack, leaving the evil meme to wonder where the enemy went. He got his answer when he got electrocuted from above.

"Weegee, no!" Malleo cried out. Weegee was now crispy as hell, but he wasn't about to back down yet.

"Asshole! I'll crush you!" the villainous meme screamed.

"How do you intend to do that? I am the superior villain, you piece of shit!" Pichu laughed. "Even Bowser is a better baddie than you!"

"That fucking does it! Take this, bitch!" Weegee roared as his was surrounded by a blood red aura.

"Oh no..." was all Malleo could say before Pichu was blasted by a storm of flames and lasers. "Weegee! This attack is too unstable! Stop it!"

"Hell no!" the younger brother replied. "Even if I die from this, as long as that punk dies, I'll die a fucking happy man!"

"You... MORTAL FOUL... YOU REALLY THINK IT IS THAT EASY... TO SLAY A GOD?!" Pichu questioned, his voice quickly warping into that of a demon. "I HAVE WAY MORE POWER THAN THIS! I HAVE ABSORBED BONECHILL HIMSELF! I THINK IT'S TIME I SHOWED YOU MY REAL POWER!"

"... We're dead," Snake said while humongous devil wings made out of ice popped out of Pichu's back. "Say your prayers."

"Bonechill?! FROM SUPER PAPER MARIO?!" Falco shrieked.

"FREEZE, VILE CREATURE!" Pichu shouted before firing an ice beam at Weegee, freezing the meme solid.

"Bro!" Malleo cried out. "That... does it... Wario, hand me a Super Star!"

"Alright, catch!" Wario said, tossing a Super Star at the red meme. After it touched him, he got surrounded by a bright light, which was quickly replaced by a golden aura. Malleo himself was sparkling, and his typical red and blue clothing was now golden and white, respectively.

"I AM STILL STRONGER, MERE FOOL!" Pichu screeched. "DON'T THINK YOU CAN TAKE ME DOWN!"

"It doesn't matter if I do, as long as I weaken you!" Malleo yelled back. "Besides, I know you won't be able to survive Shupah MalleoThe normally friendly meme flew towards Pichu, going straight through the left wing before flying back to destroy the other one. Afterwards, Malleo started charging up a laser beam from his eyes.

"WHAT... THIS POWER! IT'S TRULY REMARKABLE!" the demon mouse commented. He chuckled slightly before continuing. "Too bad it doesn't last long!" That's when the power of the Super Star escaped Malleo's veins, causing the plumber to crash right into the ground. The rest of the heroes rushed over make sure he was alright.

"Malleo! You OK? SAY SOMETHING?!" Wario begged.

"I'm... far from death... at least," Malleo coughed. "Just... take that punk out... before he spreads this pain..." Malleo passed out after that as Pichu cackled from above.

"Ohoho! Your friend may be alive, but not for long! Let's just see if you can even survive me in my weakened state!"

"Pichu, this is going to end, one way or another!" Shrek said. "I will kill you!"

"You know, I think it would be fun to destroy the whole universe... with no survivors! But one thing's for sure, there won't be any survivors on your team! It's time to meet your maker, Mr. Layers!"

**XxXx**

Spoderman was investigating a cave inside the Seaside Hill Zone that was rumored to contain a special energy so powerful, not even Arceus himself had. Most believed this rumor to be rubbish, but some still took it seriously. Spoderman decided to investigate, hoping the energy actually existed so that Dolan and the rest of the Dolan United Krew could use it's power to control Station Square and the rest of the planet.

"It must be somewhere around here..." Spoderman muttered. "This is the depth of the cave! It must be hidden in here!"

"Eh, can't you people realize that the myth is just that, a myth?" a voice from behind the MS Paint Spiderman said. Spoderman looked behind him, but he saw no one. "Down here, you twit!" Spoderman looked down to see Plankton, his arms crossed.

"Oh, hiya Plankton. What are you doing here?" Spoderman asked.

"I'm here to tell you that Dolan just got back from his trip from that stupid manga world, and he wants you to meet them," Plankton said sternly. "Now come on, he doesn't have all day, and quite frankly, I don't either."

"Yes, he's finally back!" MS Paint Spiderman said as the two began marching out of the cave. "Now I'll actually have something to do again!"

"Yeah, whatever," Plankton replied. "Just treat these people with respect. They're extremely sensitive, and if you tick them off even slightly... you'll be a beaten, dead seahorse."

**XxXx**

Dolan, Gooby, Bogs, and the Elite Four from the Pokémon Adventures Manga were waiting outside of the cavern Spoderman was in. The normally cool breeze of Seaside Hill wasn't blowing, and the sky above was cluttered with storm clouds.

"Hehehe... I can't wait to spread pain across Station Square!" Dolan chuckled in his usual, raspy voice.

"I just hope you keep your end of the bargain, Dolan," Lance stated. "If you dare as to trick us even slightly, we will end your life!"

"No need to worry, Lance," Dolan replied. "I will let the Pokémon of the world live in peace, as long as they stay out of our plans."

"That better be the case," Lorelei said. Lakithunder stared at the scene from a good distance away, wondering what was going on.

"Shockingly strange... I've never seen those guys around here..." the dark turtle said. "Although... that young redhead sure does look hot... she truly Expands Dong! I want to spark a relationship with her!"

"So, what's our first objective, Dolan?" Gooby wondered.

"First, we must find out where the Cute Toot House has been relocated," Dolan stated. "I heard that their gang was really weakened by the events that happened at the mall, so we can take them out with relative ease."

"He makes crushing rocks seem like such a breeze!" Lanky Kong, who showed up from nowhere, sang. "He's may move slow, he can't jump high, but this kong's one hell of a guy!"

"Oh my Arceus, I love this song!" Agatha commented, starting to dance to the infamous song.

"I love it so much, I wanna strip!" Lorelei said. She actually began to take her clothes off, which caused Lakithunder to act like monkey on drugs while having a sugar rush. In other words, he acted like your typical teenage boy after seeing a girl even partially nude.

"Let's boogey!" Dolan suggested. Everyone started dancing to song as Lakithunder flew by, as if he was a doll in Gmod. Donkey Kong also came out of nowhere and starting dancing and signing.

"What the hell?" Spoderman asked as he and Plankton exited the cave, noticing the chaos.

"I don't want to know," Plankton said.

"WALUIGI'S NUTS, PENIS, MERMAID MAN SMELLS, BIG, BOUNCY, MELONS AND BULLET SHELLS!" Everyone else sang, ruing the song.

**XxXx**

"Ahhh! It sure is nice to be back!" CTH Master Hand said as he, WWE Master Hand, and WWE Lucario stepped out of a portal and right into Station Square's outskirts.

"I find it strange how your world seems to be mashed up places from all places related to Smash Bros.," Lucario said, noting one major difference between the alternate universes.

"Well, they have to differ somehow, or else they won't be different universes, right?" CTH Master Hand chuckled. "Ah! It looks like my Lucario is heading this way!"

"You guys are back quicker than expected," CTH Lucario said. "So, this is my counterpart?"

"Yes, indeed," WWE Master Hand replied. "You two seem to have a lot in common, judging by how serious both of you are."

"And I'm glad about that fact," WWE Lucario said with a sigh of relief. "I would be ticked if my counterpart was a moron."

"Speaking of morons, I wonder how the WAA Weirdos Emissary is going?" WWE Master Hand thought out loud.

"Take a look for yourselves," CTH Lucario said as pointed towards a sign that said "Welcome to Station Square! Temporary home of the wonderful heroes, the WAA Weirdos Emissary! Oh, and the Kirby Crew".

"Wait... they're actually being treated as heroes?!" CTH Master Hand gasped. "What did they do?"

"They saved the city from this Evil Marc fellow, who tried to brainwash the whole town," CTH Lucario informed the others. "I'd say they deserved it. Although... the Cute Toot House hasn't been as lucky. While Evil Marc was about, Palutena lead us to the mall, where we fought against the Hot Topic Krew. Things ended in disaster for us, and now the Cute Toot House has been taking shelter in Mauville City. I had to quit because of my status with S.T.E.A.M,"

"Gods... but why did things end so badly for you guys?" WWE Master Hand inquired.

"Well... have you ever heard of Icarus?" This caused WWE Master Hand Lucario to fall into more confusion, while the other hand gasped in horror.

"That punk?! Oh fuck... this is terrible..."

"As much as I want to hear more about this Icarus, I honestly want to see the Cute Toot House in person," WWE Lucario said.

"Hmm... I guess you could go see them..." CTH Master Hand muttered. "I'll take you there. I hope we don't take too long, but I really need to see the House myself. I'm very concerned about them."

"Well, it is disappointing for you to leave when you just got here, but I guess since you shouldn't take too long, I don't mind," CTH Lucario said.

"We'll watch over until you're back," WWE Master Hand stated. "Which should only be for about how long, exactly?"

"At the very worst, three hours, and that's if they're not in Mauville," the counterpart hand answered.

"Alright. I guess you better get going?"

"Indeed. Let's get going, Lucario," CTH Master Hand said as he summoned a portal. The WWE Lucario and CTH Master Hand wandered into the portal, which vanished as soon as they stepped inside.

**XxXx**

AoStH Dr. Robotnik was sitting around at his newly rebuilt tea stand, handing tea to customers, most of which were currently Pokémon. Grounder and Scratcher were staring off into the distant sea, staring at an argument between Tentacruel and Boom Eggman. CTH Waluigi yawned, as he had no cutomers whatsoever.

"This is stupid!" Waluigi grumbled. "I should be the one having customers, not that fat freak!"

"Shut it, you Pingas!" Robotnik shot back. "You'd get customers if your food was decent!"

"Lies! My food is already decent, you bum!"

"Hey, I see Morshu!" Scratcher shouted. Robotnik's attention went from his idiotic rival to the sea, where he noticed a ship with Morshu and Fat Pikachu on the front deck.

"Sorry skinny dope, but I have other business to take care of!" Robotnik said. "Grounder! Scratcher! You're in charge of the stand until I finish my business with Morshu!"

"Oh boy, we get a prrrrrrromotion!" Grounder squeaked.

"Man, this place looks great!" Fat Pikachu sighed, already enjoying this trip.

"You bet. I might set up shop here too," Morshu commented. "But right now, we need to focus on ridding the world of Cia!"

"As much as I dislike her myself, why do you feel it is so necessary to kill her?" the fat mouse asked.

"... Aright, I'll tell. Once Harkinian gets here though, OK?"

"Fine by me, as long as I get to know."

**XxXx**

"No! It can't... end like this..." Tails shouted as he fell down onto the ground. Everyone but Wario, Shrek, Deadpool, Funky Kong, and Magolor were unconscious, or in Weegee's case, still frozen. Pichu laughed as the blizzard around them got worse.

"Just give up! There's no hope for you fools!" the evil mouse yelled. "You're going to die either way, so what's the damn point in fighting anymore! It's over!"

"Not on my watch!" Shrek roared. He and Deadpool tried to lunge for the satin mouse, but Pichu froze them with an beam of ice.

"Shrek!" Magolor shouted.

"You... I refuse to give up! After all the damage I have seen this world go through, and what it will go through, I will never back down!" Wario said proudly.

"Tell you what. Let's make a deal: you let me kill Shrek and the rest of the League of Super Evil, and I won't cause anymore harm. Sound good to you?" Pichu stated.

"Please! You'll spread chaos regardless of whether of not those guys are dead!" the yellow plumber pointed out.

"Well of course. I just figured you might have been stupid enough to accept the deal. But whatever, I guess you have more brains than it seems," Pichu responded. Afterwards, Pichu froze Wario with another beam of ice.

"Why... why does it have to end this way?" Magolor cried. "I don't want to see this! All this suffering! Why must things be this way?! Why can't evil just die?!"

"Because evil is stronger than good, in reality," the evil mouse claimed.

"Says who? If evil truly outclassed good, Mario would've never saved Peach. Giovanni would have the biggest criminal empire throughout the universe. Ganondorf would have the Triforce. DK and the rest of us Kongs would ave starved from the lack of bananas," Funky pointed out. "If anything, it looks like the opposite is true."

"Who are you to say that? I mean, you two are worthless!" Pichu yelled. "Magolor's a crybaby, and you're an irrelevant monkey! I have the power! In the end, I make all the decisions! You two merely help the stronger and relevant ones, while they fight! Or maybe you just stand in the background, watching! Or maybe you're just a trophy, meant for nothing more than teaching idiots pointless info and gathering dust!"

*Id Purpose from Fire Emblem Awakening begins to play*

"No..." Magolor said. "You don't make every decision. Not even the gods themselves can do that. Sometimes, us underdogs are the ones who take charge. There are those who stand by our side, no matter how weak, unpopular, big, irrelevant, difficult, or new they are."

"Your speech may be impressive, but I'm still in control!" Pichu insulted.

"No. You had your chance to shine," Funky said. "And you lost that. You were wiped away. You may have your fans, but I bet they wouldn't like you anymore if they found out you were like this." Strangely enough, as Funky said this, a Zoroark walked right next to the two standing heroes.

"Stop! You think my fans would betray me? I'm the only thing that matters to them!"

"No, you're not," Magolor pointed out as Ridley landed right behind him. "Just because they're your fan, doesn't mean they don't care for others." Now, Dixie Kong, Paper Mario, and Toad stood behind the two heroes. "Everyone has a fan." King K. Rool and Isaac stepped right next to Funky. "You can't control who likes who." Chef Kawasaki and Kamek joined the rest of the huge group of characters. "Some of us may never get a chance, but that doesn't mean that their fans will just ditch them." Waluigi somehow got up and stood next to Magolor. "And then there are those who had a chance, but lost it." Snake got back up and went next to the crowd. "And you know what I think?"

"W-w-what?" Pichu asked, actually somewhat intimidated by the large group of enemies, which only grew by the second. Blaziken, Balloon Fighter, Birdo, Lyn, and many others joined the group of heroes.

"You're a part of the latter. You are someone who had a chance, but you lost it. There is one thing that separates you from most of those who also had a chance. And I think everybody behind me shares the same opinion.

"YOU DON'T DESERVE A SECOND CHANCE!" the entire army yelled, which freed Wario, Weegee, Shrek, and Deapool from their frozen chambers, due to how loud they were.

"Now, say your prayers, you devil," Magolor said. He started charging up a large ball of magic in his hands, which he fired straight for the devil mouse. The attack connected, sending Pichu down the mountain. While he fell for the ground, he mutated back into his normal appearance.

"Sometimes, us underdogs are the ones who take charge," Funky said. "We can control things sometimes too. Never underestimate us, no matter how strong you are."


	21. Ch 21: Malleo is Missing!

**Chapter 21: Malleo is Missing!**

"And one, and two, and bend down!" the TV said. Dr. Gill Gilliam, the purple doctor fish from SpongeBob, who was inside the Slateport hospital/ Pokémon Center, was working out. Palutena and Mario were standing at the door, looking into the room.

"Uh, doc?" Mario said. Gill stopped his exercising to talk with the Cute Toot House members. "So, how's Toadette's condition now?"

"Oh, she's quite fine now," the doctor said happily. Palutena sighed at this news. "But, she's certainly in no condition to fight for the time being. She at least needs a week's worth of rest before she can rejoin you guys."

"Well, at least she can relax for a while without worrying about danger. But what about me? Are you sure I'm perfectly fine?" Palutena wondered.

"There's nothing we found that was wrong with you, so I'm assuming you are fit to fight evil," Gill answered. He went back to his exercising while the two CTH members looked at each other.

"I'm sure something is wrong with me. Maybe nothing major, but I know for sure I'm lacking some of my usual energy."

"I'm assuming it was whatever what caused you to fall to the ground back in Route 110. What else could it be?"

**XxXx**

The CTH Lucario and the WWE Master Hand were inside the town hall of Station Square, specifically inside the guest bedroom. Lucario was already asleep while Master Hand was on Skype with his counterpart.

"So, where is the Cute Toot House right now?" WWE Master Hand asked.

"Well, we already searched the areas north and west of Mauville, so that only leaves the southern area, unless they somehow managed to get across the water obstacle of Route 118. And that basically means they're stuck in Slateport, since Briney doesn't around the beach this late at night," the other hand informed. "Still, I'm not ure what kind of monster would attack a city like this..."

**XxXx**

"Fufufu... excellent! Those Cunt Toot Whores members are in Slateport!" Dolan chuckled. He and Gooby were inside the Sea Mauville, sitting a couch while watching the finale of Phineas and Ferb.

"Haha, Cunt Toot Whores. Sounds like something Mewtwo would say," Gooby commented. Dolan stared at him awkwardly before continuing.

"This only makes things easier! With them so close by, we can launch a full scale attack with ease!"

"Yeah, but that also means that they can find our hideout easily if they know we're after them!" Gooby warned.

"Point made. However, when I meant we, I meant someone else, who we will trick into doing it for us!" Dolan exclaimed. "Speaking of which, I just learned from Spoderman that he has kidnapped the red plumber and has left the note back in the our soon to be secondary base, the Smash Mansion!"

"Why would he put it there instead of the Pizza Hut where they hang out?"

"Because the Pizza Hut is all locked up at this time of night, dork," Dolan said before smacking Gooby with a newspaper.

"Why would we care? We're evil!" Gooby replied.

"You do realize even evil has standards, right?"

**XxXx**

"Man, that concert sure is running late," Mewtwo said. He, Morshu, Azumarill, and Dr. Robotnik were on top of a hill that was overlooking the concert for Nickleback. A large pile of scrap metal sat no too far behind them. "When's it going to start?"

"I don't think it is ever going to," Morshu said. "I heard some people back at the dump were complaining because some guy named Chad never showed up."

"Hmm... it truly is strange," Robotnik muttered. However, only one thing was happening in Azumarill's mind.

"PLOT PLOT PLOT PLOT PLOT PLOT PLOT PLOT!" a voice rang throughout the Aqua Rabbit's head.

"Hah! A HiImDaisy Persona 4 reference!" Robotnik chuckled.

"Who cares about that? All I have on my mind is murders!" Morshu joked. Mewtwo groaned at the references and proceeded to read a newspaper that was lying next to him.

**XxXx**

"WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN HE'S MISSING?!"

That voice woke Wario up and out of his hospital bed, as well as Waluigi and Tails. The trio looked around the room for the source of the voice, but had no luck in finding it.

"Wasn't that Weegee's voice?" Tails asked the other two.

"Sure sounded like it!" Waluigi said.

"Then what are we waiting for?" Wario questioned right before the back wall of the room exploded.

"WHAT AM I FIGHTING FOR?!" Zero screamed, running through the room like an idiot.

"Well, that was unneeded," the yellow plumber said. "But, let's get out there and find out what is going on!"

"WHERE THE FUCK IS HE WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS SHIT?!" Weegee roared as he ran into the room.

"Weegee, calm down! What's the probem?!" Waluigi asked.

"WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE?! YOU CAN'T TELL ME TO CALM THE FUCK DOWN! I'LL MURDER YOU!"

"Uhhh... this isn't going to end well," Tails muttered. Suddenly, a large, diamond cage dropped from the celling and trapped the evil meme.

"WHAT THE FUCK?! WHO'S RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS SHIT?!" Weegee shouted while trying to chew his way out of the cage.

"Huff... puff... oh, it looks like that cage trap actually works," Nurse Joy, who was slowly entering the room, gasped. Duck Hunt Dog and Funky Kong stood right behind the nurse. "God thing. I thought the whole building who be wrecked with him running around like that!"

"Uggghhh... I still feel dizzy from the battle with Pichu..." Waluigi groaned, feeling his forehead.

"Forget about that! We have much bigger issues at hand!" Duck Hunt exclaimed.

"What? What exactly is going on?" Wario asked the cartoon dog.

"It's Malleo! He's missing!" Funky answered. "This is why Weegee's beyond peeved!"

"I thought Weegee didn't care for Malleo's safety," Tails said.

"It seems he cares way more than he actually shows normally," Duck Hunt Dog noted. "Either way, we need to find him!"

"Yeah, but where in the heck would he be?" Wario thought. "I mean, Station Square isn't exactly filled with places to hold someone hostage without getting caught."

"Well, word has been buzzing around that the Smash Mansion has been mysteriously rebuilt," Nurse Joy informed. "People have begun to fear that the place is now haunted by spirits, causing everyone to steer clear of the place."

"Intriguing..." Waluigi said. "Whadda ya think, Wario?"

"It's not like we have many other leads," the yellow leader responded. "Once morning comes, we're heading to the Smash Mansion!"

**XxXx**

"Hahaha... now, without the Essence of Light, Icarus will be running around like a damned chicken lacking a head, looking for it. And the funniest part is, he will never find it."

The mystery villain, Cyrus, and Mecha Sonic were inside New Mauville staring at the essence that was stolen from Palutena. Zinzolin was just entering the evil lair, smiling greatly.

"Guess who was great news?" the new leader of Team Plasma said excitedly.

"You're not the only one with good news, I'm afraid," Cyrus replied. "Mecha Sonic here turned Icarus from a major threat to a minor pest."

"Good, good... although, I must inform you that I also found out where Shadow is!" Everyone took their gaze away from the essence and put their eyes on Zinzolin.

"Splendid! As if my day couldn't get any better! So, where is the punk?" the mystery villain asked.

"He and the rest of those Hot Topic idiots seem to be heading towards Hoenn, actually. I myself have no idea what they have in mind for this region, but it sure will be nice to obliterate them and take the Essence of Chaos, no?"

"Excellent... do you have any clue on where they plan on docking at?"

"It seems that their boat is heading straight towards Slateport. Of course, they may also head to Dewford, but I can't imagine them heading to Lilycove, so that leaves us with those two places."

"Hmm... I'll send out my orders first thing in the morning. For now, Cyrus and Zinzolin, I want you two to head to bed. Mecha Sonic, I want you to hide the Essence of Light from Yoshi. Surely, if he finds out that we have taken this thing from Palutena, he's going to betray us for certain, and he's vital to the plan. Understood?"

"Yes sir!" the three other villains exclaimed.

"Good... now, I have other business to attend to..." the other three left the room, with Mecha Sonic taking the essence, as the mystery villain stared at the giant computer screen. "And now... to eliminate Palpatine... before he manages to revive Death Hand himself..."

**XxXx**

It was very quiet out in space. But what the hell did you expect, IT'S LIKE EXPECTING WOLF TO ACT LIKE A NORMAL BEING AND NOT A WOLF DAMNIT. Either way, while it was silent, a battle was going on nearby. The Death Star was being attacked by Venom troops, as well as Andross himself. Despite the Empire's best efforts, the Vemon army was winning with ease.

"What? Is this it? I thought that the Empire had more strength than this!" Andross chuckled.

"Well, Palpatine isn't exactly who I'd consider to be a tough opponent, all honestly," the mystery villain's voice said through radio transmission. "Even with the Force and that army of his, he's really not all that threatening in reality."

"I dunno... I mean, if one were to fight him one on one, he could win," Andross replied.

"Eh, believe me, the Force's power is overrated. Anyone with enough willpower can effectively master it, and when you have it, it's only good for fighting those who lack the Force themselves. I have it myself, yet it's only good for chocking idiots in my way or for getting something across the room I'm too lazy to get."

"Well, that disappoints me. I wanted to learn it myself, since I was a little boy." The two villains continued their conversation until a massive explosion caught Andross' eye. The Death Star was destroyed, and the Venom army was flying away from the chaos. "And there goes the Death Star. Palpatine is finished."

"Good. Now, head back to Venom before anyone notices you."

"Affirmative. Troops, back to Venom!" The army left the burning space junk behind, not noticing the single ship the had seen the entire battle from above. Inside was a Palpitoad, a Poliwag, and a Squirtle.

"Now," the Palpitoad said with an evil chuckle. "Now is the time for action! General Poliwag, take us back to the Death Marill."

"As you wish, your greatness," the Squirtle obeyed, pressing a few buttons on the control panel of the ship. After a few seconds, the ship started moving at the speed of sound, zooming through space.

"They shall fear me! For I am Darth Palpitoad, soon to be ruler of the universe!" Palpitoad laughed maniacally as Poliwag sweat dropped.

"You're also the universe's worst excuse of a villain ever," Poliwag claimed.

**XxXx**

The Pikachu and and Greninja from the WWE universe were wandering around the beach near the Smasher's Palace, known to all as Beam Sword Beach. Rocks shaped like the swords themselves stuck out of the soft sand and pointed towards the sky, hence the name.

"There's the fact that we haven't heard word from Wario and his gang, Master Hand, or even father. Second, people from our world are randomly vanishing, with no clue on where they went, and the disappearances are becoming way more frequent. And lastly, everyone back at the palace seems to be losing it. How are you managing to cope with this, Greninja?" Pikachu asked.

"Eh, I'm just sure that everything will be fine in the end. Although, I am concerned about those disappearances. Those seem way out of place," the Ninja Pokémon said. "Besides, aside from Lucina, hardly anyone has lost it, and if they keep staying strong, they won't anytime soon."

"I suppose you're right. We just need to stay calm and think this through." The duo continued their walk until they heard a scream from above.

"OK, what was-" Greninja was interrupted by the sound of someone crashing into the ground right in front of them. After the dust settled, it was revealed that it was none other than Roll, Mega Man's sister, who crashed into the ground.

"Ow! Blast that shopkeep!" Roll grunted. She struggled to get up, but Greninja helped her.

"What the? You OK, lady?" Pikachu asked.

"I am, but Morshu won't be for long!" the robot girl said. She ran towards the eastern side of the beach, as the two Pokémon chased her.

"I'd like to know who this Morshu fellow is," Greninja stated.

"Oh, he's just a big jerk who won't allow other people to build businesses here," Roll answered.

"Wait, people are putting businesses here?" Pikachu wondered.

"Yeah. Lots of us have been making small stands to sell certain foods. I specialize in chicken." The gang kept running until a bomb blew up right in front of them, causing them to flew back where they came from.

"Mmm, I sure am one a roll!" Morshu chuckled. He stood on a cliff not too far from the recent explosion, and Fat Pikachu stood at his side.

"Ha! That's quiet the pun, Morshu!" Fat Pikachu giggled.

**XxXx**

"I see. So, they're at the hospital?" CTH Master Hand asked a Goomba. He and the WWE Lucario were in Slateport City, still searching for the Cute Toot House.

"Yeah. I heard something happened at Mauville, but they managed to stay alive. However, I also heard that Toadette got roughed up real bad," the Goomba informed the two.

I also heard that you like Mudkips!" a nearby Koopa joked.

"Ug... that meme honestly isn't all that funny," Lucario groaned.

"WHAT?!" a Mudkip with a moustache yelled. "YOU NO LIKE THE MUDKIP MEME?! YOU MUST DIE! MUDKIPS, ATTACK!"

"Oh no," Master Hand sighed. A huge army of Mudkip charged for the two heroes, all carrying torches.

"Don't worry, I got this," Lucario assured. He walked up to the mustached Mudkip and merely kicked him in the face, sending him to fly all the way towards the beach of Slateport. This caused the other Mudkips to panic before running towards the beach. "Mudkip. The most idiotic Pokémon species to ever set foot on the entire planet.

"Either way, we must visit the Cute Toot House and find out what the heck happened to Mauville. Let's move," Master Hand ordered. Lucario and the giant hand started heading towards the hospital as the sun began to rise in the east.

**XxXx**

On a yacht heading towards Hoenn, the Hot Topic Krew were wandering around. Greninja in particular was standing on the very edge of the front deck, staring at the rising sun.

"Why must that lovely Azumarill reject my love?" the frog thought to himself. "Is she interested with those of her own gender? Is she just playing hard to get? Or... does she not tolerate edgy characters such as I?" Greninja kept thinking about Azumarill as the boat got closer and closer to Hoenn.

"What's frogger thinking about?" Shadow asked Lucas, both of which were also on the front deck.

"Probably that blue rabbit thing again," the boy answered. "He know how he is about that girl."

"Meh. I don't see anything worth noting about her. Honestly, I don't see why he doesn't give up and find someone better looking." Lucas nodded in agreement as the recently rejoined Cia approached the two.

"Do you two have any meds?" she asked.

"What do you need medication for? You don't look sick or anything," Shadow remarked.

"Yeah, but I think I might be losing my mind. I was just wandering around the ship when I came across what looked like me hanging out with an Aegislash, Mario, Fox, and a few other guys I don't know. I heard them blabbering something about the Shi no Bara or whatever that was called and some alternate universe garbage, but I couldn't hear everything they said."

"Well... damn, you do need meds," Lucas said. Quickly digging into his right pocket, he pulled out a jar of pills and handed it to the fellow member.

"You know, now that I think of that Azumarill again, I wonder why that Morshu guy wants your head so badly," Shadow brought up. "I mean, what did you do to him?"

"I honestly don't remember. I heard of the fatass before, but I don't recall ever meeting him before," Cia muttered. "But... I dunno, but I almost feel like I deserved getting kidnapped.

"Are you fucking crazy?" Luigi asked as he walked up to the trio. "You didn't deserve any kind of pain from him. He's just a fatass who likes to mess with others, especially us."

**XxXx**

The newly rebuilt Smash Mansion stood tall, glimmering in the sunlight as dawn started in Station Square. The WWE stood right in front of said mansion, staring at the beauty of the place.

"So, this thing's just like the Smasher's Palace back home, I'm guessing?" Tails wondered.

"It sure as hell is, no doubt about it," Snake stated. "I just wonder who rebuilt this place if the Master Hand here didn't do it."

"Good question Snake, but we may discover the answer here," Wario commented, scratching his chin.

"Who gives a damn? Let's just go in their and find Malleo!" Weegee nagged. He swung the front door open, only to get sucked into a portal.

"Woah! What's that all about?" Waluigi gasped.

"It must be the work of EEEEVVVVVIIILLLL!" Mermaid Man yelled.

"It doesn't matter! Let's follow Weegee, gang!" Wario commanded. He lunged into the portal, with Waluigi, Falco, Crazy Hand, and Mermaid Man right behind him. The rest of the gang stared at each other for a bit.

"Do you think we really should do this?" Duck Hunt questioned.

"Do we have a choice? Malleo's missing, and we must find him at all costs," Funky mentioned.

"He's right, bud," Snake said, agreeing with the ape's comment. "Let's go through." The rest of the crew ran right into the portal, unaware that they were being watched.

"They went in, Dolan," Spoderman told the crude meme via phone.


	22. Ch 22: Smash Mansion Hijinx

**Chapter 22: Smash Mansion Hijinx**

"Hey, wake up. I said, wake up."

"Damn it Wario, wake the fuck up!"

"WHO, WHAT, EXPANSION!" Wario shouted as he awoke from his sleep.

"It's about time you woke up, fatass," Weegee said, the rest of the gang muttering amongst themselves.

"Where are we? Is this heaven?" the ignorant plumber asked. He took a good look around the place, which he realized was the inside of the Smash Mansion, thanks to the pictures of Master Hand and the Smash logo scattered about on the wall.

"I don't get it. We went through that portal only to wind up in the correct place?" Duck Hunt wondered. He scratched his chin while he stared at the sky, curious about this predicament.

"And where in the hell did we get these crowbars from?" Snake added. Wario then fully realized that everyone had a crowbar in hand.

"That's because the Smash Mansion has somehow been changed into a Gmod Death Run map!" a strange voice from behind the group of numskulls informed. Waluigi quickly turned around with a jump, being the most frightened by the voice.

"WAA- wait, Zoidberg?" The owner of the voice looked like Zoidberg, but he really wasn't.

"Actually, no," "Zoidberg" replied. "I'm Nogola!"

"That one Gomd guy?" Tails asked.

"No, I'm a mother fucking Santa Claus, who do you think I am?!" Nogola whined.

"Quit acting like a crybaby and tell us why you're here before I kill you!" Weegee demanded.

"I'm here to help you guys get through this place!" Nogola answered.

"That makes zero sense," Wario said.

"Neither does that fact that we're somehow in a Death Run map," Duck Hunt Dog reminded his idiotic friend.

"Point made. Alright, let's get moving," Wario ordered.

"Wait! Someone needs to move ahead before the rest of us!" Waluigi shouted. "Odds are there is a trap up ahead!"

"Hmm... Weegee, for being a big fat meanie lately, you have to go first!" the leader said.

"Fine, whatever," the crude meme groaned, changing his current weapon to the portal gun.

"Woah, what are you doing, punk?!" Snake growled. Weegee created a portal right in front of his feet before creating another one a fair distance away.

"He's cheating!" Nogola shouted.

"For Arceus' sakes, it's not like we're stuck in some video game! We're actually stuck in some shitty mansion that is crawling with booby traps, just like Walutena's stupid ass castle! And yet, you guys are concerned about cheating?!" Weegee yelled. The rest of the gang huddled together to talk about what Weegee just said, before turning back to the meme.

"Yes," the gang replied simultaneously. Weegee just groaned and whispered a few curse words under his breath at this response.

"Look, I'm not sure what is wrong with you dunces, but I'm going to get through this place without having to deal with bullshit. You can play fair all you want, but by the time you guys are about a quarter of the way there, I'll already be at the end of this shitty mansion."

"Quick, stop him!" Wario commanded. "We can't let him cheat!" The rest of the emissary tried to chase after the meme, but they didn't need to, thanks to a Thwomp that broke through the floor above and crushed Weegee.

"Ah, fuck it all!" Weegee groaned, sick of dealing with this kind of shit.

**XxXx**

"Oh, Palpatine. You really believe that I really didn't know that the real you was in Route 111 and not inside the Death Star? My, he's really stupid."

The mystery villain was inside their fortress, the New Mauville, watching Palpatine lurk around the rock that contained the Pokémon, Regirock. Cyrus walked in, Poké Ball in hand, and joined in on watching over Palpitane's actions.

"So, when do you plan on getting rid of him, once and for all, instead of playing dumb?"

"Soon enough, Cyrus. We have other matters to attend to right now."

"Such as finding Shadow?"

"Exactly. Speaking of which, I want you to head to Slateport and wait for him there, if that's truly where he's heading. Zinzolin is to cover the Dewford area."

"Understood, but are Mecha Sonic and Yoshi going to do?"

"I'm having Yoshi go out and travel across Hoenn to train. Mecha Sonic's going to keep a close eye on the Cute Toot House."

"Are you sure having Yoshi running around like that would be a good idea? I mean, what if he comes across Zinzolin or I attacking Shadow? Our cover will be blown, and that green dino will betray us for sure."

"Don't fret. I'll make sure he stays away from the Dewford and Slateport areas. Speaking of Zinzolin though begs the question of if he is awake or not."

"He is. Do you want me to inform him of his duties?"

"Go right ahead. Leave as soon as you two possibly can. I have some... other business to attend to."

Cyrus left the room, leaving the mystery villain all by themself. However, after the villain pressed a button on the nearby wall, another, secret door opened.

"Come on out, you two. I must speak with you."

Two figures walked into the room as told. What were these two characters, you may asked. They were none other than... Evil Marc and Pichu! The former had been revived through dark magic, while the latter was now part cyborg.

"Yes master?"

"You two have a very important mission: eliminate Palpatine, who is lurking around the Route 111 desert. And make sure no one else sees you. Got it?"

"Understood. We will leave immediately."

**XxXx**

"I'm really getting sick of this death trap nonsense!" Weegee groaned as the gang stood in front of a giant chasm, with seemingly no visible way across.

"Me too. Honestly I'd rather cheat at this point," Duck Hunt Dog stated.

"Oh, so now you want to cheat, but before it was some sort of sin."

"Not now Weegee! We need to find a way across!" Wario said.

"I just realized that this fanfic makes no sense at all," Nogola said. "That, and something's not right here..."

"What do you mean something's wrong?" Mermaid Man wondered.

"And more importantly, you just realized that this fanfic is shit?" Weegee added.

"There's supposed to be two platforms across this chasm here, yet there's not one in sight..." Nogola answered.

"Wait, how would you know that?" Snake questioned.

"... Uh, guys?" Waluigi stammered.

"Uh, what, dork?" Weegee asked as he was flipPING AS usual.

"... Look."

The whole gang turned around to where Waluigi was staring off.

A giant, glitchy black hole was approaching.

Everything was falling apart. (NO DUH DUMBASS)

"Run." Wario ordered.

And so they did.

All logic within the Death Run map had been destroyed. The gang made it across the chasm without falling.

But their fate was sealed.

They were goners.

**XxXx**

"What the hell?! What's with this fucking black hole?!" Dolan screamed as he was observing the map's mysterious destruction from his laptop. "You! You WAA Weirdos! You better get the hell out of there and find that letter! I will not let this plan fail because of some deus ex machina!"

**XxXx**

The boat to Seaside Hill from the Battle Resort was nearing its destination. Morshu and Fat Pikachu were leaning on the front deck, staring at the wide sea in front of them.

"Isn't beautiful?" Morshu asked his chubby friend.

"Sure is. It almost... makes me want to..."

"It wants to make you do what?"

Morshu kneeled down on his knees.

Fat Pikachu slowly started to lean forward.

He puckered up his lips.

Morshu realized what was going on and...

"What kind of stupid joke is this?" he asked.

"Gah! Dang it, I thought I would trick you into that!" Fat Pikachu groaned.

"Maybe next time, little guy." Morshu got back up and rubbed his weird friend on the head before he stared back at the sea.

"It splat tim," a random voice said. It was... SPLAT TIM! "I must do it."

"Wait, what the hell is going on?" Fat Pikachu wondered. After that, Splat Tim summed past the two as he flew off across the speed at the speed of Supah Sanic.

"I must serve as the desu ex machina!" Splat Tim screamed.

"It's deus ex machina, not desu!" Splat Tina, who was Tim's sister and waifu, replied as she was conveniently swimming by the boat. "Ugh... he's a weeb, but he's my hunky weeb."

**XxXx**

WWE Lucario and CTH Master Hand had finally made it to the Slateport hospital and walked inside. It was wide and spacious, but it smelled like dirty socks, moldy cheese, and Sonic 06, which made no sense, but SCREW YOU THIS IS TOTES LOGICAL!1!1!1PINGAS!1! The floor also felt like pants.

"The story has been revived! Thank Arceus for this day!" Mr. Briney screamed.

"Sir, calm down. Your blood pressure is bound to go up if you keep this up," Nurse Joy said.

"No! Don't tell me what to do, you fucking slut!"

"Geez, your world is much more... violent than what I've seen so far. At least before... this incident," Lucario muttered.

"The sad part is that, ever since this whole clique nonsense started, this has become the norm. Briney here was once a normal man until he got so engrossed with that crew crap that he went insane," Master Hand told the blue Aura Pokémon.

"Dear Arceus... was Wario actually onto something the whole time then?"

"For certain, but throwing more violence into the mix like what he has been doing is not helping," Master Hand said. That's when the giant hand took notice of the whole Cute Toot House, as well as Dick Dastardly, Muttley, and even Doc Brown! "Ah, there they are."

"Hey, look! It's Master Hand and Lucario!" Mario shouted. Everyone turned around and walked over to the duo.

"WHAT?! LUCARIO?!" Toadette shrieked with pure joy as she sped over to the two in her new wheelchair. "YAY! IT'S JUST LIKE THE GOOD OL' DAYS!"

"Hold it everybody. Let's not get too hyped up here. We have some serious business to discuss," Master Hand firmly stated.

"I-i'm sorry about what happened back at Mauville, Master Hand-" Palutena stammered out.

"Don't worry about that, it's not like it was your fault or anything," the giant hand stated. "Although, what's Emmet doing here?"

"Well, I had to pitch in to stop all this madness. That's what a normal citizen would do at a time like this," Doc Brown said.

"Too bad the amount of normal people have been decreasing," said Fox.

"What makes you say that, Fox, mah boi?" Ness asked as he munched on a Fsteak. "Most people are still normal!"

"Says the weirdest member of our group," Mario remarked.

"Can we please not dive into an irrelevant conversation?" Lucario begged.

"Yeah, let's get into some real discussion, like why did Lucario come back?" Toadette wondered. "I thought you went back to S.T.E.A.M.?"

"Oh, yes. You see, the thing is... this Lucario is not the one you know," Master Hand said. "In fact... he's not even one from this universe. He comes from the exact same one that the WAA Weirdos Emissary come from."

"Woah, what?!" Tiny Kong gasped. "But wait: if that's true, was is he here?"

"The Master Hand of his world, who also happens to be back at our Station Square, sent him here in order to help make sure the emissary was OK."

"Then why is the other Master Hand here?" Palutena asked.

"I... uh... actually forgot the answer to that, hehe," Master Hand chuckled nervously.

"Say, can you answer the question as to why the WAA Weirdos want to kick our asses so badly?" Mario wondered. "I mean, what did we do to them?"

"I'll answer this one: Wario somehow got word of the whole war going on between you and the Hot Topic Krew," Lucario started. "But here's the deal: Wario and his group, for the most part anyways, now believe that you guys are just as responsible for the chaos in this world as the Hot Topic Krew, and they want the fighting between you guys to stop."

"OK, but why are they only bringing more violence into this world then?" Doc questioned.

"Eh, they're idiots, what can you expect?" Lucario shrugged.

"Well, at least we can convince them to stop hating on us and help us take down Icarus," Mario claimed.

"That won't happen. They're stubborn as heck. The only thing that will change their mind is... actually, I'm not sure if they'll change their mind at all."

"Yay," Fox sarcastically cheered.

"That aside, I've more news that must be shared," Master Hand said. "I'm sure you've heard some rumors about the Hot Topic Krew, yes?"

"Wait, didn't we learn this stuff from the meeting?" Mario questioned.

"Look, this story may follow the Cute Toot House's story line for the most part, but not everything's going to be the same, don'tcha know?" Ness told the plumber.

"Let's not break the fourth wall, please," Lucario groaned loudly.

"Ness is correct, but, anyways... have you heard of the rumors?" Master Hand asked.

"Yeah, we all did, just a few hours ago even. Why do you ask?" Palutena stated.

"Well... I'm afraid there's not as much truth to it as they claim. Not even the part about Dark Pit and Lucas' attempt on killing Yoshi," the hand continued.

"What?! But we saw those two attacking him! They even attacked you, remember?!" Fox stuttered.

"You're right that Yoshi and I were assaulted. Thing is... it wasn't Dark Pit and Lucas who attempted murder that day."

"So, you're saying those two were posers and not the real Pittoo and Lucas?" Palutena asked.

"Indeed. Robots of Icarus, to be exact."

"That would explain why Pittoo denied everything about that when I scolded him over it: he was telling the truth!"

"But why would they try to kill Yoshi?" Mario wondered.

"That's because Icarus needed him disposed of. You see, Icarus needed someone who could not only wander around the streets and scoop up info while looking innocent, he needed someone to act like that in the Smash Mansion as well, since only Smashers, Assist Characters, and the like were allowed there on a daily basis. The only way he could do that was if he had an imposter of one of the Smashers, and he just so happened to have found one not long before the assault."

"Yoshi!" Toadette shrieked.

"That's right: the Yoshi that has been running around since that moment was nothing more than an evil member of the Yoshi race itself. The original plan was for the robot imposters to kill the Yoshi we know and love and gather up important things such as the keys to Yoshi's room and his keycard undetected. Of course, when those two dumbass robots were caught, Icarus had to launch his plan B, which has to steal a ambulance, pose as a medical professional, and rush to Yoshi's "rescue", only to steal the things he needed. I have no clue as to what he did with Yoshi however, but it's safe to say... he's dead."

But, that's only what they knew.

**XxXx**

"WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!" Funky Kong screamed. The WWE was somehow lucky enough to have survived the glitchy black hole so far, but the hole was speeding up now. The gang was running through a highly warped version of the Smash Mansion's upper floors, which were getting more and more warped by the second.

"I REFUSE TO DIE!" Weegee yelled with pride. "AS LONG AS MALLEO ISN'T BY MY SIDE, I WILL STAY ALIVE!"

"How the hell are we going to get out of this place?!" Dr. Eggman wondered in panic.

"Wait! Look up ahead! I think I see the light!" Waluigi screamed, pointing towards a light rectangle that stood a far ways away.

"Yeah, we're definitely dead at this point," Metal Sonic groaned.

"No we aren't! You guys go on! I'll try to hold back the black hole!" Nogola volunteered as he stopped running and faced the quickly approaching doom. "It's not like this thing can actually kill me or anything!"

"Wait, can that thing actually kill him?" Wario asked.

"Who the hell cares, let's keep moving!" Weegee yelled.

"Alright, black hole thing... eat Shrek!" Nogola cried out, whipping out a rocket launcher. He fired three Shrek clones out of it, which hurdled towards the impending hole of death. Of course, they failed to do anything, as they were destroyed the second they met with the black hole. "Oh well, I tried!" was all he said before the black hole sucked him up.

"No! We're doomed, doomed I tell you!" Crazy cried.

"Never give up, young lads! Failure is not what all true warriors strive for!" Mermaid Man reminded the group.

"I wouldn't give up if there was no reason to!" Duck Hunt stated. "It's time to say your prayers, boys!"

"Wah! Not yet it ain't, look!" Waluigi said. He pointed over towards the light rectangle, where Splat Tim was flying straight for them.

"What the?! Splat Tim?!" Wario wondered out loud. "Man, today just keeps getting stranger and stranger!"

"I AM THE DESU EX MACHINA!" Splat Tim roared as he turned around right before he was partially sucked into the black hole, somehow slowing it down. His body was slowly getting grinded up, with some blood spewing out onto the ground. It was so edgy, Dark Pit would've had an ogry.

"What a gross comment, LucarioFaggotRule34!" Weegee cursed.

"Flee now, idiots! Flee and save Malleo!" Splat Tim shouted.

"How does he know this stuff?" Waluigi wondered.

"Shut it and keep moving!" Snake ordered. "We're nearly there!"

**XxXx**

The actual, real life Smash Mansion was calm, yet empty. All there was, aside from a few paintings on Master Hand, a few chairs, a note stuck on the wall, and a picture of Palutena, Pit, Female Villager, Shulk, King Dedede, and Waluigi, was a desk with a computer on it. Suddenly, the entire mansion began to shake, which caused the birds, civilians, and hobo Shy Guys to flee away from the place. The computer started glitching out before it spewed out Wario, Waluigi, Falco, Crazy Hand, Weegee, Duck Hunt Dog, Snake, Mermaid Man, Tails, Dr. Eggman, Metal Sonic, and Funky Kong, in that exact order.

"We... we're alive!" Wario cheered.

"And it was all thanks to Splat Tim," Funky mentioned. "Let's take a minute to praise the manly Squid Kid, for his swagtastic swag and his courage to randomly save us from... whatever that was."

"HELL NO! WE HAVE MORE IMPORTANT STUFF TO DO!" Weegee roared.

"Woah, who shoved a dong up your butt, noob?" Wario asked.

"This note did, that's what!" the meme, who handed the note mentioned before to the yellow dork, replied.

Wario coughed a bit before he started reading the note, but he turned it over, and there was a letter! And then a message from his parents broke through the roof of the mansion.

"Well that was stupid," Duck Hunt stated.

"Quiet!" Wario ordered. "Now, let's see... it says...

"Dear pesky weirdos,

the tooters and I have taken over absolutely no place whatsoever! Malleo is now a permanent guest at our apartment in Mauville Hills. I dare you to find him if you can!

Signed, Palutena~"

"Waa! Didn't we already reference Hotel Mario?" Waluigi wondered.

"No, the Hot Topic Krew did. Lucky dastards," Wario mumbled.

"I don't care about references and shit, I only care about kicking the Cute Toot House's asses for this!" Weegee cured. "Let's roll!" Weegee than somehow flew out of the building and flew off towards the Seaside Hill Zone.

"You heard the meme, gents! Let's march, gang!" Wario ordered.


	23. Ch 23: A Random Trip To Hoenn

**Chapter 23: A Random Trip To Hoenn**

"GET OUTTA THE DAMN WAY!" Weegee yelled as he ran towards the dock of Seaside Hill, with the rest of the WWE right behind him.

"They must have somehow found out we were planning an alliance with the Hot Topic Krew! That must be why they did this!" Wario said to his best pal, Waluigi.

"Waa! That must be it for sure!" Waluigi agreed.

"I dunno... I mean, how would they have found out about our plans if they were in Hoenn for such a long time?" Falco said. "Unless... they consulted the Bread God! The Bread God could've told them!"

"Falco, that sounds so absurd. There's no way that was how they found out," Duck Hunt Dog said.

"You're right. There's no way the holy Bread God would've done that. They must have instead consulted the Toast Devil! Those fiends! I already knew they were bad, but bad enough to side with the manifestation of evil itself?! How dare they?!" Falco shouted. Duck Hunt groaned, realizing how pointless it was to reason with Falco.

"I see the dock!" Tails said, pointing towards the somewhat crowded pier up ahead.

"The Cute Toot House will suffer for their crimes!" Crazy Hand spazzed. "We'll beat 'em, and punch 'em, and dunk them in tar, and-"

"Cool it Crazy! Your blood pressure might get too high if you don't calm down!" Waluigi pointed out.

"I think... mine might... if I have to keep... running..." Mermaid Man panted as he started to slow down.

"Waa! Hang on Mermaid Man! We're almost there!" Wario said. "Just keeping moving!"

"Just keep moving, just keep moving!" Waluigi sang.

"Hell yeah, bitches!" Weegee shouted as he jumped right onto the yacht. "C'mon, step it up, dorks! You're too slow!"

"Hey! Those are my lines!" Sanic Hegehog yelled out to the other meme before Paul Blart tackled him.

"Oh! I forgot about the Wario Mobile!" Wario said. He somehow whipped the purple car out of his left pocket before he started driving it. Waluigi and Mermaid Man leaped in before the car got too far up ahead.

"No fair!" Metal Sonic whined. "My legs are getting tired, and they get to drive a car all the way there?!"

"No worries, mah boi! For you can ride with me!" Dr. Eggman said cheerfully. He was riding in his Egg Mobile, with Metal Sonic's seat decorated in pink, girly stuff.

"Forget it, I'll walk," the robot said.

"Hey, look! It's the WAA Weirdos!" Fat Pikachu said.

"Hey guys, where are you headed?" Morshu asked the goofy gang.

"We're heading to Hoenn," Funky Kong answered, stopping to talk to the shopkeep and his pals.

"Yipee for you," Mewtwo deadpanned.

"Why you heading over there for? Doesn't our city need your help?" Fat Pikachu said.

"Long story short, the Cute Toot House kidnapped Malleo, and we're going to rescue him."

"Those Cunt Toot Whores? Damn, they're still a thing?" Mewtwo wondered.

"Haha, Cute Toot Whores. Sounds like something Shadow Mewtwo would say," Weegee giggled, somehow overhearing the conversation.

"Why the hell must people bring up my fucking shitty dad?!" Mewtwo groaned in disgust.

"Hmm... almost sounds unbelievable. But I guess anything is possible," Morshu stated. That's when Azumarill tugged on the shopkeep's pants, getting his attention. "Hm? What is it, Azu?"

"Azu, Azumarill!" the Pokémon said, pointing towards the yacht, which was slowly leaving port.

"Come on, Funky! There's no time for chit-chat!" Snake shouted from the boat.

"Yeah, now hurry up!" Wario added.

"Oh shoot! How am I going to get there in time?!" Funky panicked.

"Here, you can use my Flame Runner to get across the gap between the dock and the yacht!" the CTH/ HTK counterpart of Funky said, pointing towards his infamous bike.

"Thanks, me!" the WWE Funky said, rushing over to the snazzy bike.

"Wait, how is that thing supposed to help him out if there's no ramp to send him flying?" Fat Pikachu wondered.

"HOLY BANANA SLAMMA THIS THING HAS WINGS!" WWE Funky screamed as he flew over the gang below.

"And this is why the Flame Runner is so awesome," Wario commented. Funky managed to land on the boat safely, with the rest of the WWE (except for Weegee cuz he's an ass) cheering in joy.

"But how the hell is that thing supposed to get back to the other Funky?" Tails questioned. He got his answer when the Flame Runner flew off without Funky on it.

"And this is why I don't question logic," Weegee said.

**XxXx**

Palutena and the rest of the WWE, except for Toadette and Tiny Kong, who were accompanying Doc Brown on some mission, were walking up Route 110, heading back to Mauville City, with Dick Dastardly, Muttley, and WWE Lucario following them.

"Why am I following you guys?" Lucario asked, scratching his back.

"Shouldn't you know, flea bag?" Dick teased, being a dick.

"Because Master Hand told you to, that's why," Mario remarked.

"Oh, right," Lucario said.

"Wahoo!" Mailtoad squeaked as he fell from the sky and landed in front of the CTH.

"The hell?" Fox cursed. "I swear, the world gets stranger with every passing moment."

"Hey Mario!" Mailtoad squealed, rubbing off the dirt on his clothes. "And whoever you dorks are! I've got some big mail FOR YOU."

"Uh... that's great! Who's it from?" Mario awkwardly said.

"No clue. The dude kept a hood on the whole time," Mailtoad replied. He quickly rummaged through his bag for the CTH's letter. "Ah, here it is!" He quickly yanked the dusty note out and handed it to Palutena. "Well, I have much more mail to deliver! See you guys later!" Mailtoad then began to randomly spin around before he spun right up into the air.

"Let's see..." Palutena muttered as she let out a cute little toot.

"What's it say?" Ness asked, munching on Doritos.

"It says...

"Dear Cute Toot House,

we have your old pal, Zelda, as a hostage. Either bring over 9000 bucks in cash or else we'll torture her right in front of your eyes. Bring the dough to Lilycove's sewers at sundown tonight or else.

Signed, us awesome bad guys

P.S.: You fucking suck ;P"

"Jesus fucking... just, what the hell?!" Mario asked in panic. "Who would do this?!"

"I dunno, but I don't care! We can't let them kill Zelda!" Palutena yelled.

"But we don't have enough cash to possibly free her, so what are we supposed to do?" Fox mentioned.

"I'll tell you what we'll do, we'll just take all the cash from Pit and Pittoo's college funds! It's not like the latter will ever go there anyways, so why bother saving it!" Palutena replied.

"Sounds like a plan, so let's make like Sonic and BOOM!" Dick shouted, running towards Mauville. The others quickly followed as Dolan and Gooby spied on them from the trees.

"Good, good... soon, the WWE and the CTH will kill each other..." Dolan said.

"Wait, why did you give them that letter?" Gooby asked.

"Because they need a reason to head away from this dump while we do... other business here," Dolan answered.

"Other business? You mean sex? Or going to the bathroom?" Gooby trolled.

"Gooby please."

**XxXx**

"Waa-haa-haa! Now this is the life!" Wario chuckled. He was lying on a recliner chair out on the yacht's front end. Waluigi was right next to him, looking up stuff on his laptop, while Weegee kept insulting people not too far away.

"Waa! That's for sure!"

"And that's why you are a fucking dumbass!" Weegee shouted at the same Koopa child that Waluigi knocked off the mechanical ride at the mall. "Now leave me and the rest of my gang alone!"

"Geez, who shoved a nuclear pickle up Weegee's butt?" Crazy asked, popping out of nowhere.

"I dunno, but I do know what will cheer him up!" Wario claimed.

"Why do I smell a musical number coming on?" our grouchy meme wondered.

"Teehee, "coming",' Snake inappropriately joked.

~Green Hill: Modern Act starts playing~

**XxXx**

Pac-Man: Wakawakawakawakawaka! (Pac-Man of the Kirby Crew starts chasing after Boos in Melee City)

**XxXx**

Wario: Oh yeah, oh yeah, oh yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah! (Wario leaps up from his chair and puts on awesome sunglasses)

Weegee: This song already freaking sucks ass!

Waluigi: C'mon, cheer up big guy! This song's just FOR YOU!

Crazy Hand: And don't ever forget to drink Mountain Dew! (Snoop Dogg falls down from the heavens and crushes Snake)

Wario: Whatever we're gonna do, we're gonna do it weirdly!

Waluigi: And ya wanna know why? (Snoop Dog gets off of Snake and brings out some Mountain Dew and Doritos)

Wario, Waluigi, Crazy Hand: Cause we're the WAA Weirdos Emissary!

Duck Hunt Dog: What the heck? Is going on? (DHD and the rest of the WWE come onto the front deck of the ship)

Donkey Kong: Wanna suck my big dong?

**XxXx**

~Another Winter from Scott Pilgrim VS The World starts playing~

Back at the Smasher's Palace in the WWE universe, Lucina, Toad, and the rest of the dorks inside the place actually notice the song.

Lucina: Woah there, wait, what the hell is going on?

Toad: I dunno, let's all sing along!

Greninja: Did he just say, "bang a Bronzong?"

Tingle: No, I think he said "throw around a gong!" (Tingle throws a giant gong, which crushes Palutena)

Mega Man: I think I just lost my entire mind!

Bowser: OK, but that ain't my problem!

Jigglypuff: Hey, that didn't rhyme! (Half of the screen goes back to the WWE, with the other half staying with the WWE/ SWB: DLAS Smashers)

Waluigi: Well, this is just sublime! The entire screen has split in half!

Lucina: Hey, is that Waluigi? I gotta tell him all of my true feelings!

Bowser Jr.: Oh boy.

Lucina: Waluigi, I love you! Oh, yes, yes I do! Nothing else matters more than to me than you!

Waluigi: Well, this is strange... OK, whoever you are... I'll tell you... just exactly what I love! I love: Barnacles, memes, sunglasses, tacos, Illuminati, Shrek, something something toaster, toys, Gmod, something something Another Dimension, and above all, WAR-I-O!

Lucina: Wait, what? (The DLAS part of the screen shatters, leaving the WWE to take the entire screen for themselves.

**XxXx**

"Gods, that was the fucking worst musical number I have ever heard!" Weegee complained. "And why is Snoop Dogg here?"

"I'm here to deliver the goods," Snoop said. He rummaged through his pockets, pulling out handfuls, of all fucking things, Oddish leaves. Oh, and a bottle of Coke Cola, if that helps make things more questionable. Not like everything isn't already questionable.

"Wait, Oddish leaves? Coke Cola? The heck?" Tails said.

"4Kidz drew over my weed and coke, replacing it with this unsmokable and unsniffable ship," Snoop answered somewhat angrily.

"Did they also rewrite your lines?" Weegee asked sarcastically.

"Why yes. And know you can see why I ducking hate those tiggas."

"Fuck yeah, weed!" the Gansta Weedle said, crawling over towards the gang. "Oh, and that Snoop Dogg busta. Damn. Today just ain't my day."

"Hey, don't dis a fellow gangster, buster," Snoop said. "That's against rapping code of honor."

"Fuck off, poser. I can kick your ass!"

"Oh yeah? Bring it then, homie!" The two gangsters charged for each other, leaving the others on the boat to stare in either awe or in confusion.

"Waa, you guys think we should break them up?" Wario suggested.

"Naw, it's not like the ship could be destroyed by them or something. Besides, we might get some actual entertainment from this," Snake stated.

"Hey, did you guys know that before I started saying this sentence, there were exactly two thousand and six words in this chapter?" Waluigi brought up.

"Thanks for the useless info," Weegee muttered. "Now, can something interesting please happen?!" The entire boat then began to shake, causing those on board to panic.

"I guess I should be thankful for your stupid curse, Weegee," Falco sarcastically groaned.

"I'm just thankful you're actually acting like your game self for once," Weegee said.

"One plus one equals something something smexy Bread God," Falco stupidly said, returning to normal.

"Well, that was short lived," Duck Hunt Dog sighed. "I still want to know what's causing the boat to shake though." Suddenly, a giant figure rose out of the water. It was none other than Godzilla, with his ten foot tall cousin, Swagzilla, standing on his head.

"Yo yo yo, mother fuckers!" Swagzilla greeted. "You bustas hear the news? My homeboy, Cloud Strife, he be joinin' Smash, yo!"

"What?! They let a freaking cloud into Smash, but not the grand Bread God?! SAKURAAAAIIIIIIIIIII!" Falco screamed.

"I certain he's not referring to a regular, white, cloud, Falco," Funky Kong said. "Doesn't stop it from a cruddy inclusion though. Cloud Strife's nothing but a Sony child, and a stupid one at that."

"Yo yo yo, don't be dissing mah home boi!" Swagzilla said, getting slowly but surely ticked off. "He's a fucking awesome newcomer. Everyone who gets into Smash must be loved by everyone. Anyone who refuses to deserves to die for not recognizing the true awesomeness of Sakurai."

"Oh please, you can keep treating Sakurai like a god, but he's far from perfect, smart one," Weegee said.

"Grab your popcorn boys, we're gonna have a big flame war!" Wario shouted towards everyone else on the boat.

"DID SOMEBODY SAY BIG?!" Ridley screeched, flying above the yacht with relative ease, makes crushing rocks such a breeze, he's too big, he's slow, he can fly high, but deez Ridley is one hell of a guy. Huh!

"No! Now back off!" Dr. Eggman shouted. He kicked the nearby Big the Cat, who flew right into the awesome purple reptile.

"YA MOTHA FUCKIN' NIGGA! YA THINK YA CAN DIS ME, MAH HOME BOI, AND MAH BROTHA FROM ANOTHA MOTHA OFF LIKE DAT?!" Swagzilla and Weegee's argument had already grown to enormous sizes, and the two were on the verge of fighting each other.

"Peh, please! What the hell can you do about it, wise ass? You'd need a brain to even stand a chance against me, punk!" Weegee smirked.

"DAT DOES IT, ASSHO! YA GONNA DINE IN HELL TONIGHT!" Swagzilla roared. He lept off of his cousin and onto the boat, ready to fight Weegee. Godzilla slowly wandered over to the ship to help his cousin out.

"This is madness! No, wait, this is just utter stupidity. You, risking your damn life, just because I don't think of Sakurai as some kind of god. That just goes to show how stupid people like you can be!" Weegee insulted.

"MADNESS?! THIS IS FUCKIN' TOKYO, YO!" Swagzilla lunged forward, ready to smash his left fist into Weegee's face. However, Ridley blocked the attack with a fireball, sending Swagzilla nearly flying off of the ship. Everyone else except for the WWE started running for the life boats. Except for the captain of the ship, who was wearing a dark hood.

"Damn! My ship will be toast if this battle goes on much longer!" the captain cursed. Of course, it wasn't just any mysterious captain. It was actually the mystery villain in disguise! It started mashing random buttons on the giant yacht's controls before a hologram of Mecha Sonic popped up in front of the villain.

"What's the crisis?"

"Godzilla, his annoying cousin, and some other guys are fighting my ship! I need immediate help in getting rid of at least Godzilla before this whole thing falls apart!"

"Oh shit, this is serious! I'll head over right now!"

"Good. I knew I could count on you. Hopefully you won't be long, right?"

"I'm only in Dewford. I'll only take a few minutes to fly on over."

"Thank the gods... Oh fuck!" Falco shattered right through the window at that moment, still alive and in decent shape, but not without some visible pain.

"Er... I need the power of my almighty ruler to win this fight!" Falco screamed, pulling out a loaf of bread from his right pocket. "For all that is good! I shall us the might of our lord and savior, Bread God, to defeat the monster named Godzilla!"

"You plan on killing Godzilla, one of the world's strongest mosters... with a loaf of bread?" the Mystery Villain asked, flabbergasted.

"I think you underestimate the power of bread, pheasant!" Falco said with pride.

"And I think I underestimate your stupidity," the villain scoffed.

"Hmph! Only a bird brained moron like you would make a terrible insult," Falco retorted. "No matter! I shan't waste my time on low life pheasants like you! It's time for action!" Falco leapt back down onto the front deck, where both sides were surprisingly mostly uninjured.

"Hey Falco, you alright?!" Wario asked. He and Waluigi ran right to his side, making sure his injuries were minimal.

"Worry about your own hide! I can handle more pain than this!"

"Whatever. Let's just take deez punks to downtown Chinatown!" Waluigi shouted.

"Fear not! I'll eliminate both of these feather fiends!"

"With what, the loaf of bread?" Weegee asked. "Get real weaponry, idiot!"

"More ignorant pheasants?! Sheesh! No matter! I will prove you-"

"Oh, just attack already, dumbass! I'm sick of your knightly chit-chat, bird brains!" the Mystery Villain shouted from above.

"Fine! Taste thy medicine and wrath of brad, foul fiends!" Falco shouted. He tossed his loaf of bread with all of his might... too bad it only landed a foot ahead of him.

"Gee, that was sure useful. At least it brings back some memories... stupid ones, but memories none the less," Weegee said.

"Mind if I use the Dinner Blaster to launch this thing, Falco?" Wario asked, picking up the loaf.

"Sure! That oughtta work!"

"Waa haa! Now those two are finished!" Waluigi chuckled while Wario shoved the loaf into the Dinner Blaster. "Everyone, get outta the way!"

"Wait?! And risk getting pummeled by these two zillas?! Why would we do that for?!" Duck Hunt Dog, who was running in circles around Swagzilla, asked.

"I think Wario's planning on using the Dinner Blaster!" Metal Sonic responded.

"Oh shoot! Run dudes, run!" Tails ordered. All of the WWE members and Ridley got as far away from Swagzilla and Godzilla, even though Swag still tried to chase the heroes.

"Ready... aim... fire!" Wario shouted. He pulled the trigger, launching the bread at high speed towards the smaller reptile. The attack just barely reached its target, but it still laid a massive punch. Swagzilla was sent flying back into his much larger cousin, who fell into the ocean. A few large waves hit the ship, but it stayed above water.

"Woah..." Tails muttered after the rush of waves. "Do you think they're dead?"

"Swagzilla, definitely. Godzilla may have survived, but he surely won't be in fighting condition after that," Falco proudly answered. "And that, kids, is the power of bread."


	24. Ch 24: The Two WAA Treaty

**Chapter 24: The Two WAA Treaty**

The yacht just reached the pier of Slateport City, AKA Route 109. The sun was starting to set, but it was still a long ways away from night. Meanwhile, as the boat started letting people on and off, Dark Pit, Lucas, and Shadow were sitting by the Seashore House.

"Those fucking rumors... I never called any of those guys by those names!" Dark Pit shouted.

"I thought you did call Luigi a coward though," Shadow said. "And you did for sure call me "Ow the Edge"."

"OK, yeah, I did call Luigi that, but that was before I really got to know the guy. And even though I did call you that, we're all Ow the Edge here, right?"

"Of course we're Ow the Edge. It's what makes us... us," Shadow replied with a chuckle. "Still, it sucks fucking ass that it's just us know. Course, we may still had Cia and Robin with us if they didn't have those kids."

"What really fucking sucks though is that we have to deal with that damn rumor of us supposedly trying to kill Yoshi," Lucas groaned. "I that we were past that!"

"I wish we were. I wish we were," Dark Pit sighed before he hugged Lucas. Cuz, you know, IN A RELATIONSHIP, you do that kind of stuff. Shadow chuckled at the two acting like total lovebirds, finding it cute. Eventually, they started making out as Shadow looked up towards the sky. Wingull and Pelipper flew above the near-cloudless sky, a sight that somehow relaxed the hedgehog. Shadow, despite losing many of hi friends thanks to the rumors, hadn't felt this calm in a very long time.

"You know... as much as I miss those guys, I think we'll be alright," the hedgehog remarked. "Stay low, wait until the right moment, kick Icarus' ass... then they may bother to care for us again." Of course, turning his head back to his friends, he realized that they were still making out and not paying attention. He chuckled again and looked back towards the sky. It was relatively normal... but a few seconds later, a blue blur broke through the only clouds, fliying straight for the pier. Shadow paid no mind however. All he cared about was this peace.

"Waa-haa-haa!" Wario laughed, running through the sands of the beach, not too far away from the three remaining HTK members. "It sure is a nice day for a beach extravaganza! Or however you spell that stupid word!"

"Wario, quit running around! We gotta get SpongeB- I mean, we gotta find the Cute Toot House!" Weegee ordered. "They matter more than this stupid beach!"

"Waa! Who cares about those tooters, I see the Hot Topic Krew!" Waluigi said as he pointed over towards the edgy trio.

"Yeah, so?" Weegee replied.

"So? So?! Have you forgotten that we need to form an alliance with them to save the world?!" Crazy Hand shouted. "As much as we need to find Malleo and the CTH, the alliance matters too!"

"OK, yeah, whatever," Weegee sighed. "You dingalings can form an alliance, but I'm heading up to Route 110. If you dorks don't show up in an hour, I'm leaving without you." The cranky meme started walking north, staring up at the sky. Wario and the rest of the gang huddled rather quickly afterwards.

"Waluigi, Falco, Crazy, Mermaid Man and I will hang back and trying to form that alliance with the edgy dorks. The rest of you guys follow Weegee and make sure he doesn't wander off in the event that this does take an hour," Wario said.

"Hey, you actually said something smart for once. Nice job, Wario!" Snake said. Wario and Waluigi glared at him for the insult. "What? With Geester not here, someone has to acknowledge your rare intelligent moments."

"I guess someone should say something when you aren't acting all perverted over a woman too then," Waluigi stated.

"Moving on, let's roll boys!" Wario said. The group then split up, the bigger goup hurrying after Weegee, leaving Wario and his gang to form the alliance.

"How are we gonna do this? I mean, they still are technically evil-" Falco started.

"EEEEVVVVVVILLLLLLL!" Mermaid Man shouted.

"... so they may not agree to help us out if they know what we're doing will be good rather than evil."

"Eh, I'm sure that even if they are extremely evil, they wouldn't want the world to be destroyed... at least, not by their own hands," Crazy said.

"That sentence was funny because Crazy Hand is a hand and he mentioned hands," Waluigi snickered while eating a Snickers.

"Hmph, you had to make such a stupid joke!" Wario scoffed.

"And you had to insult me for no reason, so I'm going to insult you for no reason!" Waluigi shouted back.

"Guys, stop! You're acting like Weegee! It's... as if you were infected by the Weegee Virus!" Falco pointed out.

"What?! Weegee's virus is spreading?! I must stop this! Up, up and away!" Mermaid Man yelled before flying into the air towards Route 110.

"Sheesh, can we just get this over with?" Crazy asked with a sigh.

"You're right! Men, let's form an alliance with edgeheads!" Wario shouted proudly.

"Hey, will you dumbasses keep it down?! I'm trying to make out with my boyfriend over here!" Dark Pit roared, which got the small group's attention.

"Well, ya ain't gonna make out with him any longer! You and I need to talk, edgy kid!" Wario shouted.

"Hey! Treat me with respect, fat head!"

"What?! Fat head?! Why you little-"

"Wario, stop!" Crazy begged. "Don't try to make things worse! The fate of the world depends on this moment!" Wario sighed, knowing Crazy was right. Shaking his head, he and the rest of his gang calmly walked up to Dark Pit's krew.

"OK, sorry, kid. I guess we should start this off right. The name's Wario, from the WWE!"

"Wait! I remember you! Your that gang that Metal Sonic comes from! He kicked my ass earlier! And I need revenge for that!"

"Geez, Dark Pit, calm down," Shadow said sternly. "We really don't need a fight at a time like this."

"The black hedgedog's right! You can get your revenge later! Right now, we have to discuss about an uprising evil that, ironically enough, the enemy of both of our group, and even the whole world!" Wario said.

"Wait, uprising evil? You talking about Icarus?" Lucas asked.

"The heck is an Icarus?" Waluigi also asked.

"Sigh... then what evil are you guys talking about?" Shadow wondered.

"Well... it would take a lot of explaiNING AS usual, you see," Wario answered. "I digress though. Can you fill us in on this Icarus fella?"

**One explanation from Dark Pit later...**

"Oh geez. I think he might be the one leading the cult or something," Falco said, scratching his neck.

"Wait, cult? What cult?" Dark Pit asked.

**One explanation from Wario later AND OH MY GOD THIS JOKE IS ALREADY SO EFFING OLD...**

"... Well then," was all Lucas could say. "I really don't think Icarus is involved in that cult nonsense though. Then again, I guess you can never know the truth..."

"Death Hand... why does that sound familiar?" Shadow thought.

"Either way, at least one evil threatens this world, and potentially ours too. I know you guys are also evil-" Crazy said before getting interrupted by the overly edgy Dark Pit.

"Hold it! In case our story wasn't clear enough, we're not fucking evil! All we wanted was to bring our store back to its former, edgy glory, that's all!"

"If that was your one and only goal, why did you bother trying to do terrorist like acts? Don't you realize that people, innocent people, were harmed by the consequences of your actions?" Wario asked wit suspicion.

"And why did you fucking tear the mall up the day I fought Metal Sonic?! For the living hell of it or something?! Face it, dumbass, you're no better than us goths!"

"Dark Pit, stop. This is an opportunity to get help, and you might blow the chances of that ever happening if you keep bringing tension into the whole matter," Lucas said.

"OK, yeah. Sorry for that outburst... weirdos..."

"So, what do you three say do we have a deal?" Wario asked. Dark Pit huddled with his pals and the three muttered amongst each other before splitting up.

"On one and only one condition," Dark Pit said.

"Eh? And what's that?" Wario asked.

"You guys help us get our friends back. I don't care if they don't rejoin our gang or whatever, I just want them to respect me and Lucas again," Dark Pit answered.

"Hmm... deal!" Wario shouted with glee. "Pleasure doing business with you!" Wario reached his hand out, which Dark Pit accepted, and the two did a firm handshake.

"So, what are you guys doing right now?" Dark Pit asked. "Looking for the cult or... ?"

"Naw, we're on our way towards a big battle. I'm not sure you should get involved though. You guys don't need more attention to you, since your heads are up for bounty now and all. Plus, this battle... really doesn't have much to do with the cult or Icarus, and is more or less personal," Falco responded.

"Eh... all right... good luck with the battle, I guess!" Shadow said.

"Thanks! Let's-a go, boys!" Wario commanded. The three other WWE members promptly followed Wario towards the north as the HTK started picking up the stuff around them. What they didn't realize however was that, from the other side of the Seashore House, they were being spied on by the mystery villain and Mecha Sonic.

"Hmm... you know, those WAA Weirdos are peaking my interest," the villain stated.

"Indeed. I'm especially intrigued by that battle they were talking about," replied Mecha Sonic, turning his blue head towards the Mystery Villain. "You want me to follow them?"

"Go right ahead, but make sure you don't get caught by our Yoshi. You know what will happen if he does spot you."

"Don't worry. I'm certain he won't even being out in the wilderness for much longer anyways," Mecha Sonic said before he took off for the skies.

**XxXx**

Dolan and Plankton were standing on top of the remains of Mauville, watching over Gooby and Spoderman, who were digging a massive hole. Plankton was fiddling around with a miniature computer while Dolan was keeping a close eye on the diggers.

"Still nothing on cameras two, three, and 4, but I just got something from camera one," Plankton stated.

"Eh? Like what?" Dolan asked, looking away from the diggers. Gooby noticed this and started goofing off while Dolan's attention was away.

"Appears to be a group of people, weird ones... hey, ain't that Mermaid Man?" Plankton replied. Getting a close look, Dolan saw all of the WWE members except for those negotiating with the HTK earlier. Mermaid Man was shouting at Weegee, who was shouting back with rather vulgar hand gestures, leaving the rest of the gang to try and stop the fight.

"Ah, so it's those WAA Weirdos. They must be approaching here for the Cute Toot House," Dolan remarked. "Where's their leader though? Bah, forget it. We need to evacuate before they get here."

"But don't we need to direct them towards Lilycove City too?" Plankton asked.

"Ah, good point," the evil leader said. He quickly pulled out a pizza paper I mean a piece of paper and his handy pen, which he had at all times, from underneath his hat. "I'll just write down that those cunts are in Lilycove..."

"Speaking of Lilycove though... how are Bonzi and Bogs doing?"

"Not sure," Dolan said. He then putt the note in his pocket and grabbed his phone out.

"OH MY GOD THAT IS DISGUSTING!" Spoderman screamed with a little girl voice, which drew both Plankton and Dolan's attention.

"The hell is going-," Dolan said before he looked down into the hole, only to find... Gooby... well, making himself excited, if that makes sense. I can't go into detail. "WHAT IN THE ACTUAL FUCK?! GOOBY! DISOBEYING MY RULES AND BEING OVERALL DISGUSTING?! SERIOUSLY?!"

"What?!" Gooby asked, pulling up his pants. "Can't a guy have that kind of fun every once in a damn blue moon?!"

"Not in fucking public!" Dolan shouted back. "Whatever! We must leave posthaste anyways. The WAA Weirdos are coming."

"THE WAA WEIRDOS ARE COMING, THE WAA WEIRDOS ARE COMING!" Gooby shouted randomly, failing his arms in the air. Everyone just stared at him, wondering why he was so out of whack today.

**XxXx**

"Good thing we showed up right then, or else that would've been... well, let's not talk about it," Wario said. The gang was traveling up Route 110, shuffling through the grass and avoiding the wild Pokémon that lurked in it.

"So... whadda you guys wanna jabber on about? Kittens? Memes? Death? Something actually worth having a big discussion about that doesn't involve our upcoming battle?" Waluigi asked.

"And pray tell, what exactly is wrong about talking about our battle?" Weegee asked back, actually not being a dick for once.

"Uh... that's actually a good question..." Waluigi groaned while scratching the back of his head. "Uh... because some of us may be uncomfortable about that topic?"

"Well, they better get comfortable with it, because we have to do this battle! We can't just leave Malleo with those dastardly tooters!" Eggman said.

"The man with the plan's right, we have to do this!" Weegee shouted with immense pride. "I say we discuss our battle strategy!"

"Hmm... well, we clearly need to sneak attack them! After all, nothing's stronger than a good stealth attack to the private parts!" Wario said. "And, uh... how about we head to Mauville first before we get too ahead of ourselves first, eh? Survey the landscape before we plan our... plan?"

"Sounds good enough for me," Weegee said. "Just as long as I get sweet justice on those jackasses for kidnapping my bro!"

After that, there was nothing but silence.

Pure silence.

Except for the shuffling grass. And the nearby waves of water. And the Wingull from above. And anything else you can think of as the gang continued northwards.

"OK, this is just plain boring," Funky said, with everyone nodding to his statement. "Hmm... maybe we should play some sweet jazz you liven things up!"

"I know the one and only thing that can turn things from boring to exciting at this point," Weegee claimed. "And I can't believe I'm the one saying it, nonetheless saying it at all, but..." Letting out a sigh, our evil meme turned his head over towards Wario. "Wario, mah boi... we need stupidity. Big time stupidity. Insanity. All of your wacky traits."

"Wa-waa? Really?"

Wario, Waluigi, Falco, and Crazy stopped dead in their tracks.

"... IT'S-A WACKY WARIO TIME!"

Then all hell broke loose.

Wario pulled out the Wario Mobile from his pocket, utilizing cartoon physics again. Everyone somehow managed to fit onboard before the fat plumber starting driving along the low road. Falco pulled out two air horns and while Waluigi grabbed a trumpet from Funky Kong. The two idiots started blaring them like crazy, with the end result actually sounding like the Hoenn Gym Leader theme. Everyone was having a good time, for perhaps the first time since... since this mess ever began. Since the Weirdos first showed. Even Weegee enjoyed this somewhat.

"You know... It's strange," Weegee thought inside his head. "Despite the fact that I hate Wario and his stupid pals... they somehow can make me happy on the occasion... it's especially strange when that one occasion is when my brother has been kidnapped... I should be in an uncontrollable rage... yet, here I am, enjoying the presence of my arch enemies... hell, do I even truly hate these guys? Is my hatred for them even real? Is it just some sort of persona that even I'm not entirely aware of, that exists for no real reason? Oh, the hell with it. Save the damn philosophy for later. I should just live through the good times without a care." Suddenly, the car stopped, brining Weegee back into reality. Looking around, he noticed that they were in the ruined Mauville City.

"Waa! What happened here?!" Wario asked, shocked by the state of the town.

"I believe there was something on the news about Godzilla running through this area of Hoenn. I can't quite remember though," Metal Sonic answered.

"The real question is though, where in the hell are the CTH then?" Snake pondered.

"I think this letter is the answer to all of our questions!" Waluigi said. He found the letter Dolan had waiting for them, lying on the remains of the Pokémon Center.

"Is that letter really anything worthwhile? I mean, that could just be any random letter," Weegee mentioned. "I seriously doubt it has anything to do with us."

"Waa, but it does!" the lanky plumber replied. "Come check it out!" Weegee shrugged before the rest of the gang decided to check the letter out for themselves. After everyone surrounded Waluigi, he started reading the letter out loud.

"Dear WAA Weirdos Emissary,

we have caught word of the recent crime the Cute Toot House has committed. We too have had it with those fiends, thus, we've decided to assist you in your quest. While we cannot provide any physical reinforcement, we can tell you where they went. After Godzilla ruined this town just a few hours prior, they left for Lilycove City. We caught word that some of their close friends, Paula and former member Zelda, were kidnapped and taken their. We cannot confirm this, but we believe that if they were indeed kidnapped, well, it was extremely warranted. Again, we apologize for not being able to do more, and we wish you luck on this mission.

Signed, the DUK organization,"

"Huh... is anyone else finding this fishy?" Weegee said.

"Well, it is written that only Li- I mean by some group we never heard of before... but, this is our only lead," Wario responded, scratching his belly.

"Trouble is getting there," Tails pointed out. "It'll take at least a few days for us to get there!"

"Hey, I can help you guy out with that!" SMG4 squealed, leaping out of the nearby bushes with a smile on his face.

"Waa! Where'd he come from?!" Waluigi asked, slightly in panic mode. Of course, no one bothered to answered as a polygonal Waluigi suddenly appeared in SMG4's hands.

"Waluigi LAUNCHER," a random voice blared before the polygon Waluigi was sent flying towards the gang. The other Waluigi crashed into Weegee, who in turn crashed into everyone else, before they all went flying. While most of the gang conveniently managed to land safely near Lilycove, poor Weegee was sent flying all the way to Mossdeep City, crash landing into the ground.

"Yeeeeep. Just live through the good times while they fucking last," the meme weakly said.

**XxXx**

~The Pokémon anime remix of Lilycove City starts playing~

Fox and Mario were sitting on a bench right next to the Pokémon Center, eating lotsa spaghetti under the setting sun. The Wingull watched them from the center's roof, wanting the food. All was calm in Lilycove... kinda.

"This spaghetti actually tastes pretty good!" Fox said with genuine gratitude, stuffing his mouth full of the yummy food.

"Thanks! I really tried my best on this batch!" Mario chuckled. The two kept eating until Mario got a text from Palutena. Grabbing the phone out of his man purse, he skimmed over the text in question. "Hmm... hold it! Palutena just texted me! Says that the whole Zelda thing was nothing but a hoax!"

"What?! Why in the hell would someone do that?! To lure us here to fight someone or something shit like that?!" the fox angrily shouted as the song stopped playing. That's when a loud crash could be heard from the west, that crash being the WWE landing. The entire town started fleeing, heading towards the newly built storm shelter that lied north of the town.

"What the?! What was that?!" Mario wondered. Meanwhile, Bonzi Buddy, the virus master, and Bogs Binny were spying on the two from the top of the Department Store, with Malleo and Paula tied up on a vending machine.

"Yes, yes... the end of the Cute Toot House and the WAA Weirdos Emissary draws near..." Bonzi cackled in sweet, evil delight.


	25. Ch 25: Melee In A Vanishing City Part 1

**Chapter 25: Melee On A Vanishing City Part 1**

The members of the Cute Toot House and the WWE Lucario were standing right in front of the Pokémon Center of Lilycove. The last remaining civilians kept running towards the storm shelter in the north, knocking each other down to get there before any potential chaos could begin.

"So, why are the townsfolk here so scared of one quick, painless quake?" Fox wondered.

"I heard that since the Groudon incident a while back, everyone here have really gotten skittish over earthquakes, no matter how big. Godzilla's recent rampage probably isn't helping things either," Mario answered, tugging slightly on his moustache. "In other news, I also heard that the residents like Mudkips, but that's irrelevant."

"Mario, not now," Palutena groaned. "The last thing we need are references."

"Agreed. I had too much of that garbage back home," Lucario said before sipping on his tea.

"So, what are we gonna do? See what was responsible for that quake, or just sit here like a bunch of lazy bones?" Ness asked.

"Hmm... you guys go take care of that. I'm going to head to the storm shelter and make sure things don't get too out of hand there," Lucario said before dashing off towards the north.

"Well, I guess it's just us then," Dick Dastardly said.

"Thanks for obvious info, Captain Dick Face," Palutena remarked, crossing her arms.

"Woah! If you guys want my help, I say you give me more respect than that!"

"Stop. We have a job to do, just an FYI," Toon Link said, fed up with this nonsense.

"Fox, mah boi, a winner is you! Lezzza goooooo like-a Mayro!" Ness said. He started walking off towards Route 121, leaving the rest of the CTH no choice but to follow.

**XxXx**

"Let's-a see..." Wario said, examining a piece of paper attached to a clipboard, with every member of the WWE except for the Malleo Brudahs surrounding him. "Metal Sonic, Funky... yep, everyone except for Weegee has been accounted for!"

"But where would he be?" Tails pondered, stretching his legs.

"Hmm... good question..." Wario muttered. The entire gang stopped to think, leaving the entire clearing silent... until Waluigi heard some sort of noise, that is.

"Waa?" The lanky plumber decided to poke his head through the nearby bushes and quickly scanned the environment and noticed nothing out of place, outside of a group of strange figures on the main road near Lilycove. Finding this trusty binoculars, he peered through them, only to discover that the figures were indeed the Cute Toot House. "Waa! It's them!"

"Who, what? What are you talking about, Waluigi?" Dr. Eggman asked. "Wait! You don't mean..."

"Yes, the Cute Toot House! Right on the main road!" Waluigi replied.

"Oh, I thought you were referring to the IRS. Those dorks won't leave me the heck alone..."

"Forget about the stupid IRS! This our chance! We can ambush them with relative ease!" Wario shouted.

"But what about Weegee? He'd help make this battle such a breeze!" Funky argued.

"Forget about him too! It's not like we can't find him later or something. This is our shot! Our, one, perfect, shot to ambush them! This will for sure drag us into the lead! And I for one will not waste it! Let's charge!" Wasting no time, Wario pulled out the Wario Mobile once again and hopped into the driver's seat, with Waluigi, Falco, and Mermaid Man taking up the other four seats and drove off towards the soon-to-be battlefield, leaving the rest of the gang to catch up. After running down some bushes and small trees, Wario made it onto the main road, made a sharp turn, and drove right into the CTH before they had time to react, sending the opposing team into the air.

~Back To Mad starts to play~

Wario's quartet leaped out of the Wario Mobile, letting it drive itself right into the ocean before exploding. Wario whipped out the Dinner Blaster and started charging it up before firing three shots, all three hitting Mario, Ness, and Fox. Palutena and Toon Link managed to land on the ground safely, staring right into Wario's eyes.

"What?! Wario?! The heck are you doing here?! And why are you attacking us?!" Toon asked.

"We're here to end you evil doers! Now, hand over Malleo, and maybe we'll make your deaths a little less painful!" Wario demanded, pointing the Dinner Blaster at the two.

"What?! Who the hell is this Malleo?!" Palutena brought up. Of course, Wario was fed up with this, and launched a heaping plate of spaghetti right towards Palutena's face in response, sending her towards the sea.

"Of course," Toon groaned. "I knew that guest at the hotel was right about some sort of cheap crossover battle coming on." The toony hero dashed over towards Wario, but was stopped by Waluigi, who clashed his tennis racket with Toon's Master Sword. The two traded blows with their weapons, surprisingly evenly matched.

**XxXx**

Fox crashed right into the Move Deleter's House, landing on and breaking his table. Rubbing the back of his head, he got up, groaning and examining his surroundings. "The hell? What the fuck is going on?!" he wondered. Suddenly, Falco broke the door down, holding his laser-pooping gum right at Fox's head. "Falco?! The hell is going on?!"

"I'll tell you what's going on, fox face! We're here to save Malleo and kill off your gang once and for all!" Falco responded.

"WHAT?! Why the hell wou-" Fox then realized that this couldn't be the Falco he was used to, and went into a battle stance. "Oh. So you're the WWE Falco. Look, I have no damn clue where you guys got the idea that we kidnapped that Malleo guy, but if you want to kill us... well, it won't be easy!"

"Hmph. Leaving that note and yet you guys pretend you're innocent? Some smart battle strategy you have there," Falco said. He started firing lasers with his gum, but Fox retaliated with his laser gun. Both sets of lasers were no use, as they only clashes with each other. This kept going on until a light blue arrow shot through the hole in the roof, nearly stabbing Falco in the toe.

"Wait, isn't that... one of Pit's arrows?" Fox wondered.

"Well, you'd you think it came from?" Pit said with a chuckle, slowly falling don right next to the fox.

"And guess who else decided to join the party?" a certain cocky voice added. Fox and Falco looked up to find the way past cool dick himself, Sonic, standing on the remains of the roof.

"Sonic?! What the hell happened to you?!" Fox wondered as the hedgehog jumped down next to the space furry.

"No time to explain that. We have company to deal with," Sonic replied, pointing towards Falco.

"Heh. Just some puny angel and a hedgehog who stars in cruddy games? Is that all the backup ya got, Fox?" Falco smirked.

"Oh, you did NOT just go there buddy!" Sonic shouted, his face turning red.

"Oh, but I did. Now then, let's settle this with fists... because TALK IS CHEAP, JUST LIKE YOUR FACE!" the space bird replied. He lunged for the trio, who lunged forwards as well. However, Pit, sent him flying right through the hole in the roof, care of his trusty Upperdash Arm. Falco screamed as Pit, Fox, and Sonic turned to each other.

"Now, with him out of the way, I can explain some things. First, for a while there, the Hot Topic Krew had me as a prisoner up until that battle we had at the mall-"

"Wait! If it wasn't you with us up until that point, then who was with us?!" Fox angrily asked.

"A robotic imposter of me. Original, I know, but that's besides the point. I managed to escape the HTK's grasp during the fight, but I got kidnapped again by some strange group, called the Dolan United Krew or something. I didn't get to hear much of what they were planning, but I did hear something about luring two groups together to kill each other. Judging from this fight, I'd say it was us and the Weirdos that those guy were talking about."

"But how did you manage to free yourself from both places?" Fox wondered. He then realized how pointless of a question that was and shook his head. "Nevermind. That can wait for later." He turned back towards the door, getting into another fighting stance. "We have to hold these guys off before they do manage to kill any of us."

**XxXx**

The WWE Barnacle Boy, who somehow managed to get to the CTH universe only to look for Mermaid Man, just exited the bathroom of the second floor, a newspaper underneath his right arm, only to find the second floor nearly ruined, with shelves knocked over, merchandise all over, and some holes in the walls.

"What the barnacle is going on here?!" Barnacle Boy shouted. "This is nearly as bad as Black Friday, only there's no one else around!"

"Are you really implying anything could be worse than Black Friday?" Wario asked, walking into the room.

"Eh, you're right, the day is a whole new level of madness. But still, what happened?"

"The Cute Toot House kidnapping Malleo, that's what," Wario answered.

"Uhh, the Cute Toot House kidnapped somebody?" BB asked. Of course, before BB could get the answer he wanted, Mario burst through the wall and smashed Wario hard in the face with his trusty hammer. As Wario flew across the room, Barnacle Boy fled the scene, nearly tripping over the merchandise on the ground. Thanks a lot Mario. Anyways, Wario crashed right into the cash register, knocking it over and sending money out of it.

"I was expecting a battle today, but not with you guys!" Mario said as Wario got right back up.

"Eh? Like that matters. The only single thing that matters is victory, and you know what they say: I'm-a gonna win all of the toasters toasting toast!"

"Nobody smart says that Wario. Then again, that would explain why you would say it," chuckled Mario. "Get it? Cause you're a moron!" Mario however got too obsessed with his insult, leading him to fall onto the floor into hysterics and Wario into sighing. But since this gave the yellow doofus time to come up with a strategy to defeat his mortal, red nemesis, Wario decided to use his time wisely. Looking over by the bathroom, HE found an Ice Flower leaning against the wall and ran over towards it

"Well, you're no smarter than me if you're going to waste your time and life chuckling like that," Wario said before he grabbed and swallowed the Ice Flower.

Mario slowly stopped his ignorant chuckling, slightly panting and wiping his forehead. "Heh. What are you jabbering on about, idi- OH SHIT!" Mario was then pelted by a small storm of iceballs, which he managed to block most damage by raising his arms up to his face, but it still hurt.

"That. That's what I'm jabberin' about, dork," Wario, now in an outfit of yellow overalls and a light blue hat and shirt, said proudly.

"OK, wise guy. I guess it's time for me to get truly serious, huh?"

"Nope, if anything, it's time for you to..." Wario opened his wide, disgusting mouth, charging up a giant iceball.

Mario groaned, realizing what stupid, obvious pun Wario was about to pull. "For me to freeze, yeah yeah- wait, CRA-!" Wario fired the fully charged iceball, which smashed into Mario at full force, freezing him solid and sending his frozen body flying out of the building. Wario ran after him, leaped high into the air, right next to his arch-rival plumber, and slammed his two fists right into him, shattering the ice and sending Mario to fly straight towards the ground and inconveniently landing on our favorite pervert, Solid Snake. Ness and surprisingly enough, Luigi, saw Mario's crash and rushed right up to him.

"Mario! Are you OK?!" Luigi asked in panic.

"Eh... really cold, slight pain, but I can keep fighting... wait, what are you even doing here? I thought you were in Rustboro!" Mario said, slowly getting off of the unconscious Snake.

"Yeah, about that- WAH! GIANT ICEBALL FROM ABOVE!" the green plumber shrieked, pointing to, obviously, and giant iceball headed straight towards them. The Mario Bros. and Ness ran over towards the eastern side of the city as Snake slowly got up, wondering what the big deal was about. Fortunately, he was barely able to notice the iceball in time, and escaped the attack, which froze over the small area in front of the Department Store.

**XxXx**

~Back To Mad stops playing as Vim Factory from Mario &amp; Luigi: PiT starts~

Bogs Binny and Bonzi Buddy were watching the battle intently from the top floor of the Department store, with Malleo and Paula tied up to chairs, also being forced to watch the battle.

"Hahaha! It's only a matter of time until these punks kill each other!" the purple monkey chuckled evilly. "How are you two enjoying this fight?"

"It's terrible! You guys should be killed for this, or something!" Malleo cried out.

"Eh, I honestly don't give a shit," Paula said.

"Gee, someone around here needs to get their mouth washed with soap! Ah well, ain't my problem. So, whadda you think of the battle, Binny?"

"Quite frankly, while the battle is fun to watch, I think we should leave this place right now," Bogs replied.

"What?! Why?! This fight is great! And it will only get better once both sides start to truly suffer!" Bonzi shouted.

"Yeah, but this fight seems to be getting too out of hand. The destruction these pieces of shit are doing was far beyond Dolan's initial predictions, and soon enough, this whole town will fall to bits... and us two won't survive."

"C'mon, you're just a pussy! Ain't nothin' gonna happen to us!"

"I'm not a damn pussy, asshole!" Bogs yelled.

"Really? Then you'd have the balls to stick around and enjoy the show while I head to the bathroom," Bonzi taunted. "Seriously, I think those nachos I had before just showed up to the chocolate factory." With that, the virus monkey ran over to the elevator, leaving Bogs alone with the two captives.

**XxXx**

~Back To Mad starts up again~

Wario, who was still in his Ice form, was trading punches with Mario, who was now in his Fire form right in front of the Contest Hall. Neither side was winning until Wario managed to land a punch into Mario's stomach, causing the normally red plumber to skid back a bit. Wario then started up his iconic Shoulder Bash attack and rammed into Mario before he stopped skidding, which sent Mario up into the air, where Wario launched his Wario Corkscrew move to do even more damage, the last hit sending Mario flying towards the northern end of the town. Meanwhile, Mecha Sonic was watching the fight from high above, "anal"yzing the situation.

"Hmm... neither side is winning, mass destruction..." Mecha Sonic muttered. "Hmm... ah, the hell with it. This is way too tempting. It's time to cause some murders!" The blue robot curled up and dived right down towards the ground, landing on top of the harbor. He scanned the area a bit, noticing Palutena all alone by the entrance of the town. After chucklLING AS usual like Sonic, he flew right towards the stinky goddess. "Hey honey? All alone, eh?"

"You?!" Palutena asked, turning her head around. "What are you doing here?! What do you want?!"

"Feisty, but I'm not in the mood for that. I came here after hearing a fight was going on and, well, being a villain and all, I couldn't help but join in the fun," Mecha Sonic answered.

"What?! So, that "I'm being forced to kill" stuff back at 110 really was nothing but bullshit!" Mecha Sonic had enough talking though, as he rammed into Palutena with an uppercut, sending straight up into the air.

"What's that, whore?! I can't hear a damn thing when you're flying away!" Mecha Sonic laughed. "But, enough fun and games. When the master's away, the robots will play."

**XxXx**

On what used to be the base of Team Magma sat the Spiritomb that was brought up in this story before. Sorry for his corny reintroduction, but someone had to jab at that fact. Anyways, he was busy watching the fight, specifically watching Sonic duke it out with Eggman and Metal Sonic.

"I wonder... which side is the heroes? Or are neither of them heroes?" Spiritomb wondered, tilting its head to the right. He didn't have much time to ponder however, as a hedgehog-shaped shadow loomed over him. He turned around, but he got trapped inside a bag before he could do anything.

"Ho-ho-ho... nothing personal, kid..." the owner of the shadow laughed. It was none other than the true edgy hedgehog, er, hedgeheg, Coldsteel. "Now... what else should I fucking do..." Coldsteel looked up towards the sky, only to notice Duck Hunt Dog flying towards him. Ducking down, the flying dog flew right into the ocean, with Mecha Sonic following the puppy. "I fucking guess leaving is the only fucking answer. Damn. I fucking I wanted to fucking kill someone." Before anything else could happen, Coldsteel warped himself away from the battle.

**XxXx**

Wario, still in Ice form, was hiding inside the harbor, drinking some Fresh Water he stole from the Department Store to heal himself up. After taking the final sip, he crushed the bottle in his left hand and tossed it right next to him. He got onto his feet and waddled over towards the exit when Waluigi entered the building.

"Wario! Big news! Some other Sonic robot joined the fight!" Waluigi warned.

"Wah? So, that means more help for us, or..."

"No, he's attacking both sides! He has attacking both Fox and Tails when I saw him!"

"Oh boy, a third party..." Wario grumbled, though Waluigi snickered at his comment. "Hey, wait, what's so- oh, I get it, third party, Sonic's a third party character! Hahaha!"

"Knock knock!" a certain Italian voice shouted from the other side of the building. Wario and Waluigi turned towards the other side of the room to see Fire Mario and Luigi, now in a Blue Shell, charging right for them. Neither had any time to react, resulting in Ice Wario getting struck by Fire Mario's Super Jump Punch, and Waluigi smashed into the legs when Luigi hid inside his shell while at full speed. Wario was sent straight through the roof, Mario in pursuit, while Waluigi merely tripped, though he was soon grabbed by the legs by Luigi and was tossed out of the building and right into the ocean, Super Mario 64 style.

"Haha! I haven't felt this good in a long time!" Luigi laughed, running after Waluigi. "Ain't nothing like kick your arch-rival's ass!"

**XxXx**

Mermaid Man was running away from Ness, who kept trying to assault the hero with blasts of PK Fire and his annoying "OK" quote, the two nearing the harbor. Just as it seemed like Ness was about to tackle Mermaid Man, Waluigi was sent flying out of the harbor, which managed to distract both of them, though Mermaid Man wasn't as distracted and picked up Ness before tossing him into the sea.

"Kids these days... it's like they don't even how to pay attention anymore..." the old man sighed.

"What are you walking about, you old coot?" Barnacle Boy, who came out of nowhere, asked.

"What?! Barnacle Boy?! I thought I told you to stay back at home!"

"You did, but you never told me you were going to an alternate stinking universe, nonetheless going to be gone for this long," BB answered, crossing his arms. "You know darn well you're too old for this kind of action, old man. Heck, you're too old for any kind of action. Now come on, we need to get going to our universe."

"No Barnacle Boy. I'm a super hero. Saving the world is my duty, and there is nothing you can do about it!"

"And what exactly do you think you can do to stop me from dragging you back, hmm?"

"Oh, only this thing."

Mermaid Man dug into his left pocket, rummaging around and somehow making clanging noise by doing so. Within a few seconds, he finally got what he wanted and pulled out a giant rocket launcher. Barnacle Boy's eyes bugged out big time.

"WHAT IN- MERMAID MAN?! THE DONUT ASSAULTER?! YOU'RE GOING TO USE THAT THING ON ME?! TH-THIS IS MADNESS!"

"No. This... is... donuts!"

Barnacle Boy screamed just like a little girl and ran faster than Sonic, running all the way towards Fortree, not wanting to be involved with this fight... or this universe for that matter.

"Mmm. Looks like I won't need this anymore," Mermaid Man said. Grabbing the Donut Assaulter with both hands, he turned towards the nearby ocean, leaned back, and tossed the weapon right into the sea. Cause you, let's waste weapons. But whatever. Suddenly, some of the water shot up like a geyser, with a purple aura surrounding the water. Luigi ran out of the harbor and noticed the aura geyser.

"What the hell is that?!"

The geyser and aura suddenly stopped as a purple figure popped right out of the ocean and started flying straight for Luigi, hurdling at magnificent speeds. The purple figure was actually Waluigi, now in his Cape form. Waluigi struck Luigi with an uppercut, then a flurry of insanely fast punches, and a rapid spin attack before finally sending the shelled plumber up into the sky with another uppercut. After that, Waluigi flew up in pursuit of his nemesis, only to kick Luigi back down towards the ground.

"Waa haa! The Super Feather is by far the best power-up!" Waluigi laughed, floating above the rest of the fight. "Say, where's Wario at..." Waluigi surveyed the area, putting his right hand above his eyes. He noticed that Ice Wario and Fire Mario were fighting on top of the Pokémon Center, trading punches yet again. This time though, Mario struck a kick right into Wario's chin, sending him flying towards Route 121. Waluigi grew cross at this sight and started flying right down towards Mario, who managed to notice the lanky plumber. In response, he pulled his fist back, said fist getting engulfed in flames.

"Falcon..."

Right as Mario was about to unleash his attack, Waluigi vanished into thin air.

"PUNCH!"

Of course, the attack did ultimately nothing, leaving Mario to wonder where in the hell Waluigi went. His answer hit him... literally, on the head. Waluigi reappeared right above him in some sort of spinning fashion and crushed Mario beneath his feet, as well as destroying a small potion of the Pokémon Center's roof.

**XxXx**

Mecha Sonic was floating in the sky again, right on the very edge of Lilycove's outskirts, scanning the ocean for the one he was waiting for. The one who would change the battle.

Weegee.

"Still no sign of him. You'd think he would have shown up but now, but- wait, what's that thing?" Mecha Sonic zoomed in his vision all the way towards the very edge of Route 124, where Weegee himself was, swimming towards Lilycove with unusually red, beady eyes. "Ah, excellent! He's not only heading this way, but h's already completely infected! All that time... figuring out the future... setting thing into place... soon, both clubs will be nothing but ashes... but, I suppose. Seems like it'll take him about two and a half hours to make it here. That still leaves plenty of time for me to kill some of these fools for him." Mecha Sonic turned his attention back towards the battle, noting Fox and Falco engaged in yet another laser fight on the beach, Eggman and Metal Sonic chasing Sonic and Palutena, and Snake throwing grenades from the top of the Cove Lily Motel.

"Will the WWE learn the truth about the CTH's intentions? Will Doc Brown, Toadette, and Tiny Kong show up to help? What has Weegee been infected with, and how does Mecha Sonic know about it? Tune in next time on the world's worst rip-off, WAA Weirdos Emissary Z!"


	26. Ch 1?: hUh? Wuz THIS?

**Chapter 1?: hUh? Wuz THIS?**

~In The Future from Pokémon Mystery Dungeon: Explorers Of Time/ Darkness starts to play~

Pizza Hut... dedededededead. SEEWHATHAPPENEDside Hill... dead. LilycoVe City... dead. The whole world... NO, NO, NO, the whole universe, DeAd. Gray Everywhere. Everything... STONE. Gravity... non3xistent. Waluigi... ONCE upon a time, fought Mario, on top of the POKéMON Center... both of them, now FROZEN. Frozen within stonE. Souls... sTILl there... but no LONGFORDEATHer ACTive. Everyone... waz in **the** exactic same p0sition. FroZEN. Hanging ininininin the RIAEHTREFERPI air. No 1 was SAFE... but 1 MANaged 2 git FAR FAR AWAY. He, however... waS in pure TERROR. hE kNew the _truth_ of WHAT happened. He stillllllllll hasnt gotten O-ver hwut HAPpened.

... bUT, wii have GONE off ov the MYMAINISMEWTWO main point. Th-th-th-that being... THE CURRENT STATE OF THE ORIGINAL UNIVERSE. **t**HE uniVERSUSverse... IF tiem wassssss still ACTive -TIME DIED RIGH- the univers3 wood haVe b33n lik this SINCE DecemB3r EiGhTh of 2015... TOOLONGgonloot. ANDANDDAN it stayed th_at_ way... UNtil today.

A purple portal opened up right by the Lilycove museum. Out of it came a small, mindless, hovering robot that resembled the head of Dr. Eggman. Inside of the robot sat a camera, which was recording everything.

**XxXx**

"Interesting... I knew I already made a breakthrough when I discovered that concept of alternate universes were real..." a dark figure commented, analyzing the live footage. The figure sat in a dark room, with the only light coming from the giant TV screen that showed the footage, though the figure was so far away that the light couldn't reach him. A remote control for the robot in the original universe was in the figure's hands, the figure fiddling with the one control stick to get a good view of everything. "But... this universe appears to be... dead. Like time itself just... stopped. Yet, it still exists... possibly leaving a chance to bring it back to life... and if my information on that Kynthia is correct, which it should be... I may not be able to restore it in full, but I should be able to restore specific people... just perfect for causing more chaos while I wait for the perfect chance to initiate the final part of my plan... but then again, even though killing this universe's Kynthia would be fun, I don't really need Grima on my tail... I guess I should find some other "dead" timeline to get the essence I need.


	27. Ch 2?: Chrom and Za- KYNTHIA BEHIND YOU

**Chapter 2?: Chrom and Za- KYNTHIA BEHIND YOU**

~Temporal Spire from Pokémon Mystery Dungeon: Explorers Of Time/ Darkness starts to play~

Anoththther dead TIEMline. Thisss 1one1, a DEad future of A different Hot ToPIC K**r_ew_** UNITEverse. Frommm what wou_l_d bee SeasDIED Hil ZONe in both the ORIGINal and REBOOTed WHY Weirdos Emissarrrrrrry universe, in this one, CaLLed Lake Seaside Dyre Dyre Hylia Hill Docks, sto0d hunDREADs of creatures IN what APpeared 2 be AAA fOoD court. maWHILE mosssssssst of T.H.E.M. were JusT liek everANDEVERyone back at-at the originAL WWE un!vers3: frozeN in SToNE./.. exCIApt for 1111one111101, that one BEINg Kynthia, the GODDess O**f **time, as well az eht owner **o**F the EKANS-essence **OF** tiem. SHE wazzzzzzz still frozen likIke everyone else, but..?. her SOUL was still ACTive. She could still see what was in front of her, she could still think... but that was it. She couldn't FIGHT against her frozen imprisonment. Despite her goddess status, she was still at the MERCY of the frozen time, though she could have prevented her insanity-inducing fate if she anticipated the universal time freeze beforehand. If she had an ITEM with massive energy like a Super Star, she could break free... but alas, with no one else unfrozen, that could never happen unless someone from another timeline came to help, that would never happen.

... And even though someone... er, something, from a different timeline would arrive, they wouldn't help at all.

~Temporal Spire stops playing~

Another portal opened, right behind Morshu's ice cream stand. Once again, the Eggman-like robot floated out of it, taking in the dead environment. Just what would have been a few seconds later, the robot found Kynthia's frozen body, her back facing the mindless robot. Not wasting any time, the robot quickly lunged for the frozen body, with a drill popped up from the top of the simple robot. In a matter of seconds, the drill pierced right in between her shoulder blades, going in just enough to enter her mostly lifeless body. She barely had any time to react emotionally to the GIGAIMPACT of the drill however, as the essence of time was absorbed into the robot within a matter of seconds, which deactivated her soul completely.

**XxXx**

The dark figure was once again watching the giant TV as the robot spiraled through the portal it used to get into that universe. The figure tapped its left foot, waiting for the robot to come back.

"Now... I could have just started "reactivating" people from that universe... but that other one from before... there's something about it that just... feels like it's only more fitting to start there. But I suppose, either way, I should probably stop focusing on these "dead" timelines and focus on the events going on within this one."


End file.
